Notes: Just to cover all my bases, Gundam Wing and anything affiliated with Gundam Wing does not belong to me in any way shape or form, although sometime I think how nice it would be to own the forms of Duo and Heero….but that's another story. Bob, however, is of my creation, inspired by Riot9. Take and be damned!
Road Trip
AHH! Don't do that! The first thing you should know is you never ever sneak up on a deer. God! Nearly gave me a heart attack! Well, what can I do for you? Oh, that's right. You're the one who's supposed to get my story, right? How you talked me into retelling that bit of a traumatic experience I'll never know. However, I'm a deer of my word. So where should I start? Oh, by the way, I'm Bob. Bob the Deer.
Well it was about a month ago…
* * * * *
"Yeah!" The voice of Duo Maxwell echoed through the two-story house. A figure all in black, with a braid to his waist, slid down the banister. Duo landed with a loud thud. After adjusting himself into a more comfortable position, Duo looked up to see Heero Yuy standing over him with a disapproving glare.
Duo quickly jumped to his feet and pecked his boyfriend on the lips. Heero was unaffected by the energetic nature of his companion.
"We're going camping! We're going camping! We're going camping!" Duo sang, skipping circles around Heero. His braid moved from side to side, occasionally slapping Heero in the gut. Heero stuck his leg out in front of Duo, tripping the excited boy. Seeing he had succeeded in shutting him up, Heero spoke.
"Don't gloat. Get your stuff together. I'm leaving in twenty minutes." With that, Heero walked away, leaving Duo on the floor.
"Hai!" Duo chirped after him. He'd been buying camping gear like mad for a week. Not only has Duo purchased every possible necessity for ever eventuality, but two of everything he thought was pretty.
The back of their S.U.V. was packed to the brim. Sleeping bags and duffel bags were strapped down tight to the rack on the roof. The back seat contained two ice chests of food and a 5 gallon tank of water. The only thing Duo had left to load was his floaties.
Precisely twenty minutes later, the engine of the S.U.V. revved up and Heero put the vehicle in reverse. In the passenger's seat, Duo fiddled with the radio dials and the air vents. Unable to sit still, he bounced to the music coming through the speakers. Heero's face was expressionless, hiding well the painful thought that it would be 12 hours of driving with "this."
"Hee-chan, you like the place I picked out, right? I mean it's pretty and secluded where no one can bother us. Not another soul for miles, except in the other camp sites; just you and me for a week." Duo petted Heero's arm which was occupied holding the steering wheel. The slightly irritated driver gave a grunt of approval. "Good," said Duo, "'cause I would hate it if you really didn't want to go there and were just doing it so I could be happy."
"You're going to have to drive eventually. You should sleep so you won't be tired when it's your turn." Heero glanced over to his boyfriend, giving him a rare smile of compassion. Newly assured of Heero's sentiments, Duo reclined the seat as much as possible and dozed off. "At least part of this trip will be quiet," thought Heero to himself.
After about six hours of driving, Heero had pulled over and switched with Duo. Duo, now in control of the car, decided music was in order. Pulling out his leather CD case, Duo rifled through his collection, every so often glancing back at the road. "Barbra Streisand, Billy Joel, Godsmack , soundtrack to Lilo and Stitch…" Duo ran though his list twice before finally selecting Wheatus. Unconcerned about Heero sleeping next to him, Duo blasted the music. Full of energy, he sang along with every word on the album, flailing his arms about en leau of dancing. Suddenly, Duo slammed on the breaks and screamed.
* * * * *
Well it was about a month ago, a little after my cousin Connie had come down from Canada to visit. I swear, since she moved up there, her Deeranese is being overrun by that accent they have. Anyway, I had just been to see her off and was heading back home. It's a long walk from the Northern Rim to…. You know the North Rim, up by that, what do they call it, border. Well after walking all day and only resting occasionally, I was pretty low on steam. So I stopped by the Express, that hard, black river in the middle of the trees, and got something to eat.
It had been a while since I'd eaten near the Express, so I was pretty excited. Not only did I get to stop and munch, but I got to munch on greens by the Express. Not may of us make that trek. A lot of deer go, but not all of 'em come back, at least not how they were before.
So I'm eating leisurely, saving up my energy for the long walk I still had ahead of me. I let my mind wander, relaxing myself and taking in the night. After a while, I got full and started walking again. It was when I had to cross the Express that it happened… I'll never forget it. It hit me like a falling tree hits the ground, hard. I stood there shocked, like a two-legger caught in headlights. That's when I blacked out.
* * * * *
Heero shot up in his seat a split second before Duo screamed. Duo's hands gripped the steering wheel hard, bracing himself for impact. The scream emanating from the long haired driver could have broken glass. Suddenly there was a loud "thump" quickly followed by another "thump" and the sound of glass cracking in a million pieces.
The S.U.V. came to a screeching halt. The view through the windshield was obstructed by the spider web of cracked glass and a large object now on the hood.
"Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!" Heero slapped Duo across the face in order to end his broken record of a boyfriend. "OUCH!! Heero! Are you alright? It just came out of nowhere, I swear. It hit us! I can't believe it jumped out and hit us!" Apparently the slap didn't work.
Heero exited the car to assess the damage. On the hood of the vehicle was a deer. Miraculously, the animal was not bleeding, but seemed to be unconscious. Heero slowly reached out a hand and touched the deer's snout. The creature didn't move.
"We have to take it with us." Duo demanded. "Who knows how hurt the poor guy is. I mean, how mean would it be to just leave him here, even if it was his fault?"
"Are you crazy? Bring a deer along with us? You're insane!" Heero was exasperated. Duo knew Heero was upset, he was exhibiting emotion. However, this didn't daunt him at all.
"We have to take him! Just so someone can look at him."
"You said yourself, no one around for miles! Seclusion and all that crap you raved about. Who the hell is going to look at the deer, which YOU HIT by the way?"
Duo frowned and caused his eyes to transform into those of a sad puppy. "Please?" His nose became strangely wet and he began panting with his tongue lolling out of his mouth
* * * * *
I woke up and found myself uncomfortably cramped. What I saw were two of you two-leggers with his head outside of the thing we were in. It was really hard to see through the spider webby thing. The other one with the long tail was sitting and looked mad. My head hit something so I couldn't stretch all the way. I became frantic and started pounding on everything. The one with the tail screamed, hurting my ears. The other one came back in and made us stop, I think. I was just as freaked out and continued to kick whatever I could. Soon I started biting things.
* * * * *
After an hour of struggling to put the deer in the back seat, Heero and Duo finally got underway again. Heero was now driving, not trusting Duo as far as he could throw him. He had to stick his head out the window in order to see the road. The windshield was shattered and way beyond repair. Duo sat sulking in the passenger seat.
It took about and hour but it finally happened. The deer had woken up. Duo screamed. Startled by the ear splitting noise, the deer started biting on Duo's headrest, grabbing some of Duo's hair in the process. Duo screamed even louder and an octave higher. This time the windows did shatter.
Heero had pulled over quickly when he heard the hooves on the ice chests. Bounding out of the car, he grabbed the backdoor and yanked it open. Yelling at Duo to get out of the car, Heero ran to the other side and opened the other backdoor, figuring the deer would eventually work its way out of the backseat.
* * * * *
It took me forever, but I finally got the hell out of there. After tasting all that crap in that one two-legger's tail, I was more than eager to go. My legs were in a weird position, and my side was hurting like mad, but my survival instincts yelled at me to run. The one with no tail gave me a way out, which confused me. It was almost as if he wanted me to leave. I had always heard from my uncles that usually you two-leggers want to keep us. I didn't care at the time. It was a way out and I took it. I stumble out onto the Express. I got up and ran as fast as my sore hooves could carry me. Ever since that night I don't go anywhere near the Express.
* * * * *
Duo was curled up in a ball crying on the side of the road. Heero came over to him and hugged him close.
"I'm sorry Heero! This is all my fault. If I hadn't put in the music, if I hadn't taken such a long nap, if I hadn't suggested camping, if I…"
"It's over," Heero said in an alarmingly comforting voice. He held Duo and rocked him back and forth. "This looks like a nice spot. Want to camp here?"
Duo's head shot up and he stared into Heero's eyes. In them he saw genuine concern and love. Hesitantly, Duo began to chant, "We're going camping, we're going camping, we're going camping."
"Don't ruin it. And don't get too excited. You're the one who's going to have to tell Quatre what happened to his car."
Road Trip
AHH! Don't do that! The first thing you should know is you never ever sneak up on a deer. God! Nearly gave me a heart attack! Well, what can I do for you? Oh, that's right. You're the one who's supposed to get my story, right? How you talked me into retelling that bit of a traumatic experience I'll never know. However, I'm a deer of my word. So where should I start? Oh, by the way, I'm Bob. Bob the Deer.
Well it was about a month ago…
* * * * *
"Yeah!" The voice of Duo Maxwell echoed through the two-story house. A figure all in black, with a braid to his waist, slid down the banister. Duo landed with a loud thud. After adjusting himself into a more comfortable position, Duo looked up to see Heero Yuy standing over him with a disapproving glare.
Duo quickly jumped to his feet and pecked his boyfriend on the lips. Heero was unaffected by the energetic nature of his companion.
"We're going camping! We're going camping! We're going camping!" Duo sang, skipping circles around Heero. His braid moved from side to side, occasionally slapping Heero in the gut. Heero stuck his leg out in front of Duo, tripping the excited boy. Seeing he had succeeded in shutting him up, Heero spoke.
"Don't gloat. Get your stuff together. I'm leaving in twenty minutes." With that, Heero walked away, leaving Duo on the floor.
"Hai!" Duo chirped after him. He'd been buying camping gear like mad for a week. Not only has Duo purchased every possible necessity for ever eventuality, but two of everything he thought was pretty.
The back of their S.U.V. was packed to the brim. Sleeping bags and duffel bags were strapped down tight to the rack on the roof. The back seat contained two ice chests of food and a 5 gallon tank of water. The only thing Duo had left to load was his floaties.
Precisely twenty minutes later, the engine of the S.U.V. revved up and Heero put the vehicle in reverse. In the passenger's seat, Duo fiddled with the radio dials and the air vents. Unable to sit still, he bounced to the music coming through the speakers. Heero's face was expressionless, hiding well the painful thought that it would be 12 hours of driving with "this."
"Hee-chan, you like the place I picked out, right? I mean it's pretty and secluded where no one can bother us. Not another soul for miles, except in the other camp sites; just you and me for a week." Duo petted Heero's arm which was occupied holding the steering wheel. The slightly irritated driver gave a grunt of approval. "Good," said Duo, "'cause I would hate it if you really didn't want to go there and were just doing it so I could be happy."
"You're going to have to drive eventually. You should sleep so you won't be tired when it's your turn." Heero glanced over to his boyfriend, giving him a rare smile of compassion. Newly assured of Heero's sentiments, Duo reclined the seat as much as possible and dozed off. "At least part of this trip will be quiet," thought Heero to himself.
After about six hours of driving, Heero had pulled over and switched with Duo. Duo, now in control of the car, decided music was in order. Pulling out his leather CD case, Duo rifled through his collection, every so often glancing back at the road. "Barbra Streisand, Billy Joel, Godsmack , soundtrack to Lilo and Stitch…" Duo ran though his list twice before finally selecting Wheatus. Unconcerned about Heero sleeping next to him, Duo blasted the music. Full of energy, he sang along with every word on the album, flailing his arms about en leau of dancing. Suddenly, Duo slammed on the breaks and screamed.
* * * * *
Well it was about a month ago, a little after my cousin Connie had come down from Canada to visit. I swear, since she moved up there, her Deeranese is being overrun by that accent they have. Anyway, I had just been to see her off and was heading back home. It's a long walk from the Northern Rim to…. You know the North Rim, up by that, what do they call it, border. Well after walking all day and only resting occasionally, I was pretty low on steam. So I stopped by the Express, that hard, black river in the middle of the trees, and got something to eat.
It had been a while since I'd eaten near the Express, so I was pretty excited. Not only did I get to stop and munch, but I got to munch on greens by the Express. Not may of us make that trek. A lot of deer go, but not all of 'em come back, at least not how they were before.
So I'm eating leisurely, saving up my energy for the long walk I still had ahead of me. I let my mind wander, relaxing myself and taking in the night. After a while, I got full and started walking again. It was when I had to cross the Express that it happened… I'll never forget it. It hit me like a falling tree hits the ground, hard. I stood there shocked, like a two-legger caught in headlights. That's when I blacked out.
* * * * *
Heero shot up in his seat a split second before Duo screamed. Duo's hands gripped the steering wheel hard, bracing himself for impact. The scream emanating from the long haired driver could have broken glass. Suddenly there was a loud "thump" quickly followed by another "thump" and the sound of glass cracking in a million pieces.
The S.U.V. came to a screeching halt. The view through the windshield was obstructed by the spider web of cracked glass and a large object now on the hood.
"Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!" Heero slapped Duo across the face in order to end his broken record of a boyfriend. "OUCH!! Heero! Are you alright? It just came out of nowhere, I swear. It hit us! I can't believe it jumped out and hit us!" Apparently the slap didn't work.
Heero exited the car to assess the damage. On the hood of the vehicle was a deer. Miraculously, the animal was not bleeding, but seemed to be unconscious. Heero slowly reached out a hand and touched the deer's snout. The creature didn't move.
"We have to take it with us." Duo demanded. "Who knows how hurt the poor guy is. I mean, how mean would it be to just leave him here, even if it was his fault?"
"Are you crazy? Bring a deer along with us? You're insane!" Heero was exasperated. Duo knew Heero was upset, he was exhibiting emotion. However, this didn't daunt him at all.
"We have to take him! Just so someone can look at him."
"You said yourself, no one around for miles! Seclusion and all that crap you raved about. Who the hell is going to look at the deer, which YOU HIT by the way?"
Duo frowned and caused his eyes to transform into those of a sad puppy. "Please?" His nose became strangely wet and he began panting with his tongue lolling out of his mouth
* * * * *
I woke up and found myself uncomfortably cramped. What I saw were two of you two-leggers with his head outside of the thing we were in. It was really hard to see through the spider webby thing. The other one with the long tail was sitting and looked mad. My head hit something so I couldn't stretch all the way. I became frantic and started pounding on everything. The one with the tail screamed, hurting my ears. The other one came back in and made us stop, I think. I was just as freaked out and continued to kick whatever I could. Soon I started biting things.
* * * * *
After an hour of struggling to put the deer in the back seat, Heero and Duo finally got underway again. Heero was now driving, not trusting Duo as far as he could throw him. He had to stick his head out the window in order to see the road. The windshield was shattered and way beyond repair. Duo sat sulking in the passenger seat.
It took about and hour but it finally happened. The deer had woken up. Duo screamed. Startled by the ear splitting noise, the deer started biting on Duo's headrest, grabbing some of Duo's hair in the process. Duo screamed even louder and an octave higher. This time the windows did shatter.
Heero had pulled over quickly when he heard the hooves on the ice chests. Bounding out of the car, he grabbed the backdoor and yanked it open. Yelling at Duo to get out of the car, Heero ran to the other side and opened the other backdoor, figuring the deer would eventually work its way out of the backseat.
* * * * *
It took me forever, but I finally got the hell out of there. After tasting all that crap in that one two-legger's tail, I was more than eager to go. My legs were in a weird position, and my side was hurting like mad, but my survival instincts yelled at me to run. The one with no tail gave me a way out, which confused me. It was almost as if he wanted me to leave. I had always heard from my uncles that usually you two-leggers want to keep us. I didn't care at the time. It was a way out and I took it. I stumble out onto the Express. I got up and ran as fast as my sore hooves could carry me. Ever since that night I don't go anywhere near the Express.
* * * * *
Duo was curled up in a ball crying on the side of the road. Heero came over to him and hugged him close.
"I'm sorry Heero! This is all my fault. If I hadn't put in the music, if I hadn't taken such a long nap, if I hadn't suggested camping, if I…"
"It's over," Heero said in an alarmingly comforting voice. He held Duo and rocked him back and forth. "This looks like a nice spot. Want to camp here?"
Duo's head shot up and he stared into Heero's eyes. In them he saw genuine concern and love. Hesitantly, Duo began to chant, "We're going camping, we're going camping, we're going camping."
"Don't ruin it. And don't get too excited. You're the one who's going to have to tell Quatre what happened to his car."