~I REWROTE SOME OF THIS A COUPLE TIMES SO I HOPE ITS BETTER. I'VE JUST
DISCOVERED HOW COMPLICATED THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IS B/C I REWROTE THE LAST
BIT IN JESS'S POV AND HAD TO SWITCH THE VERB CONJUGATIONS AND PRONOUNS!
THANKS TO MY FAITHFUL REVIEWER'S CINDY, LAURA, HARLESSGIRL, AND THE TWO
NEWEST REVIEWERS, THE FLAMING SAFETY PIN NAZI, and DALAMMADT~
~Gin's POV~
~Next Saturday~
I pull in front of the Toretto house and obviously a raging party is going on. The whole street is parked with tricked-out imports and I have to park at the opposite end.
I walk up to the door and knock. Nothing. I knock again. Still nothing. Leon spies me from the window, finally, and comes to open the door.
"Well, well. What brings you here?" Leon teases. "Jess is in the dining room."
"I.I'm not here to see Jess.. I just need to talk to Dominic for a minute."
"Oh, ok.." Leon says confused. "Yo, Dom!"
Dom come to the door, "Hey Gin. Good to see you back. You here for-"
"No," I cut him short. "I left my shades here. I just came back for them."
Dom looks surprised, but leaves to get them. He returns and I smile, but just then, Jesse sees me.
"Gin?" He calls, almost frantically.
I look at him longingly for a minute and then hurry away, out the door. Damn my car for being parked so far away.
"Gin" He calls louder. I quicken my pace.
"Please, Gin, just talk to me. I thought things were going pretty good."
*So did I* I think.
"Things don't always work out, Jess. You should know that by now." My voice cracks as I hold back tears.
"Who was that guy I saw you with? Is this the reason you broke up with me? You found someone else?"
He's piercing my heart with thoughts like that. There is no one else. I feel like there never will be anyone else.
"Jack is only a friend, Jesse, not that it matters much now."
"Gin, you're crying. What, what's wrong?"
"Forget about it Jess! Stop! Just go back inside. It's better this way."
"No. Girl, I just...DAMN IT! There's no reason for this!"
I continue to walk, counting the cracks in the sidewalk as my shoes scuff across the ground.
"All I want to do is understand. I just want to know why!"
Finally, I can't hold it in any longer. I don't want to hold it in. "You want to know why? Here's the reason why." I yell, my voice cracking. "The last guy I fell in love with screwed me over! Literally! I found him fucking a girl I thought was my friend. I know now that it wasn't really love. I only thought it was. He never made my heart beat faster with just a touch, made me feel on top of the world when he smiled, gave me so much attention without a second thought. Jess....I have truly fallen completely in love with you so fast.....everything about you....your hair, your face, the way you can't get the words out when you get excited about something, how you can have the innocence of a little boy and then come and kiss me with such passion that I know you're a man, you, Jesse, YOU..... I just got so scared! Cuz the way I love you is such an intense feeling that if you ever cheated on me, I honestly might die of heartbreak, ignoring how cheesy and cliché that sounds! And all of this has happened in the span of what? A month and a half? I thought it would be easier to just break it off before I got hurt. NOW I pretty much screwed myself over because I can't stop this dull aching feeling that I'm constantly feeling when I'm not with you!" I continue to walk to my car. Slowly, ever so slowly.
Jesse stares after me and then, head hanging, silently does a U-turn and walks back up the sidewalk, up the stairs to the porch of the house. Dom is standing in the doorway. He's heard everything. Jesse looks at him with eyes of fear, hurt, and almost..shame.
"Jesse," Dom starts. "Don't be fucking stupid. She just said she loves you, and I sure as hell can tell you're whipped. Go after that girl before she walks out of your life altogether!"
Jesse stands still for about a half-second and then takes off running after me. He can run pretty fast so he makes it to me before I get near my car. When he reaches me, I'm still crying silently. Wet, salty tears trail down my cheeks and my vision is blurred. He turns me around to face him and wipes my tears away with his slightly callused thumbs and his shirttail. Jess holds me close and kisses me. I go loose for a second, caught in the moment, but then feel myself tense up once again. "Jess..we.I..can't. I'm sorry. I'm not strong enough to take the risks." I turn away and start to walk to my car once again. He stares, watching me go and then trudges back to the house, completely dejected, rejected, unwilling to face Dominic.
Jesse goes inside and I double back, sinking to the ground in front of their house, my back against the concrete wall, guarding their lawn from the sidewalk. My knees are pulled to my chest, as it starts to rain. I just sit there shaking, miserable, in so much pain that I might as well have been stabbed and the knife been twisted round and round in the wound. I feel so stupid for having done this because I already do feel like I'm going to die. Now it's partially my pride that won't let me go back. I just feel so incredibly retarded because it really doesn't make any sense what I did. I didn't want to take the risk of having my heart broken, but breaking up with him immediately did that.
"Shit!" I say to myself. I had left my sunglasses with Dom! Slowly, I rise and walk up the stairs, gently knocking on the door, only half-hoping someone can hear me.
Dom answers, holding the glasses playfully. He knew I would come back for them.
"Thanks," I whisper. I give him a quick hug. "Thanks for everything, being so welcoming." I turn away, walking out the door.
"Jesse fell for you, you know." I stop at his rough voice. "He's head over heels and I don't even think he fully knows how deep his feelings run. I can just tell. No one takes his beanie and lives. Please don't do this Gin." Silence ensues and then the door shuts gently.
I partially walk down the stairs, giving little gasps for air. Suddenly, I do a 180 and run up to the door, throwing it open. I storm into the house, my eyes darting all over the downstairs, looking for that familiar beanie.
I see him standing there with Leon in the kitchen, deep in conversation looking so perfect. Sharp pain shoots through my heart. The music's blaring and everyone's in his own world, but Letty sees me come in.
"Hey Gin. Didn't expect to see you here." She smiles.
"Letty, now's not the best time to talk." I say a little more curtly than I mean to.
I head into the kitchen soaking, shivering, and completely in turmoil. Jesse's back is to me, but Leon starts to speak. "Dawg.." he says.
~Jesse's POV~
She quickly taps me on the shoulder. I turn around confused to see her at all, and to see her soaking wet. She looks at me for a moment and then at Leon.
"Sorry Leon." She says as she lightly pushes him on the chest just to move him a little away from me. "I'm sorry..." she whispers, kissing me for only a second, because I don't kiss back, and then grabs my hat, puts it on her head and walks out the back door, into the backyard and the rain.
I'm very confused, a little ticked off by this time, thinking, * She breaks my heart and then takes my favorite hat? Who the fuck does this chick think she is? *
I follow her out into the rain. "Gin, you can' t have my fucking hat," I almost spit, knowing very fucking well she can have whatever she wants from me. I reach out my hand to take it off her head, but she grabs my wrist and pulls me back to the stairs leading out the rear of the house so she's standing even with me.
Quietly, she whispers again, "I'm so sorry. I feel so stupid for having done all of this because the whole reason was so I wouldn't get hurt, not even thinking of you, and I screwed myself because the moment I broke up with you I did get hurt." She babbles.
"You gotta take a little dirt to keep what you love." I say reminding her of the song she was singing along to on the beach.
"It's worth it to you?" She asks, incredibly surprised. I sheepishly nod my head. A great sigh escapes her lips and she smiles her incredibly smile. It lights up her whole face, and mine with it. She grabs my shirt and pulls me forcefully close. She places her left hand on the back of my neck and head, and pulls me into a kiss. My hands immediately go to her face and she wraps her arms tightly around my waist. Our kiss is at first gentle, but long- awaited passion creeps in and our roughness surprises us both. We're trying to get as close to each other as possible.
"Gin, I...I love you. It's.just, it's hard for me to say, cuz..cuz I've never been in love before." I blurt blushing slightly, still scared to say it even though I know she loves me, and then a huge grin takes over my face.
"I told you I was a mental case. I really am. I don't know what anyone sees in me."
"Yeah....and I told you......you're my mental case, always will be. There's no escaping now, cuz I'm not letting you go."
"So, you won' have a problem with my keeping your hat?" She grins playfully and I lightly nudge her shoulder because she got me to laugh. I pull her close and softly kiss her. She slips her tongue into my mouth and I put my other hand around her waist lifting her up as I walk the stairs into the house. We stand in the kitchen hugging, until she shiver again.
"Hold on for a sec." I run upstairs and return with a towel for her. Wrapping it around her, I hold her close for extra warmth. I don't want her to get sick.
I look over Gin's shoulder and Letty's in the doorway with Leon. She mouths a few words to me and does a little dance. "Someone's gonna get hooked up tonight!" My mouth drops open and my eyes widen, but I'm smiling. She puts one finger to her lips and leaves the doorway.
~REVIEWS REVIEWS REVIEWS OR YOU WON"T GET THE HOOKUP FOR A WHILE!!!! AND...... OH IT'S A DOUBLE HOOKUP BABY! SO LETTY/DOM FANS REVIEW TOO!!!!!!~
~Gin's POV~
~Next Saturday~
I pull in front of the Toretto house and obviously a raging party is going on. The whole street is parked with tricked-out imports and I have to park at the opposite end.
I walk up to the door and knock. Nothing. I knock again. Still nothing. Leon spies me from the window, finally, and comes to open the door.
"Well, well. What brings you here?" Leon teases. "Jess is in the dining room."
"I.I'm not here to see Jess.. I just need to talk to Dominic for a minute."
"Oh, ok.." Leon says confused. "Yo, Dom!"
Dom come to the door, "Hey Gin. Good to see you back. You here for-"
"No," I cut him short. "I left my shades here. I just came back for them."
Dom looks surprised, but leaves to get them. He returns and I smile, but just then, Jesse sees me.
"Gin?" He calls, almost frantically.
I look at him longingly for a minute and then hurry away, out the door. Damn my car for being parked so far away.
"Gin" He calls louder. I quicken my pace.
"Please, Gin, just talk to me. I thought things were going pretty good."
*So did I* I think.
"Things don't always work out, Jess. You should know that by now." My voice cracks as I hold back tears.
"Who was that guy I saw you with? Is this the reason you broke up with me? You found someone else?"
He's piercing my heart with thoughts like that. There is no one else. I feel like there never will be anyone else.
"Jack is only a friend, Jesse, not that it matters much now."
"Gin, you're crying. What, what's wrong?"
"Forget about it Jess! Stop! Just go back inside. It's better this way."
"No. Girl, I just...DAMN IT! There's no reason for this!"
I continue to walk, counting the cracks in the sidewalk as my shoes scuff across the ground.
"All I want to do is understand. I just want to know why!"
Finally, I can't hold it in any longer. I don't want to hold it in. "You want to know why? Here's the reason why." I yell, my voice cracking. "The last guy I fell in love with screwed me over! Literally! I found him fucking a girl I thought was my friend. I know now that it wasn't really love. I only thought it was. He never made my heart beat faster with just a touch, made me feel on top of the world when he smiled, gave me so much attention without a second thought. Jess....I have truly fallen completely in love with you so fast.....everything about you....your hair, your face, the way you can't get the words out when you get excited about something, how you can have the innocence of a little boy and then come and kiss me with such passion that I know you're a man, you, Jesse, YOU..... I just got so scared! Cuz the way I love you is such an intense feeling that if you ever cheated on me, I honestly might die of heartbreak, ignoring how cheesy and cliché that sounds! And all of this has happened in the span of what? A month and a half? I thought it would be easier to just break it off before I got hurt. NOW I pretty much screwed myself over because I can't stop this dull aching feeling that I'm constantly feeling when I'm not with you!" I continue to walk to my car. Slowly, ever so slowly.
Jesse stares after me and then, head hanging, silently does a U-turn and walks back up the sidewalk, up the stairs to the porch of the house. Dom is standing in the doorway. He's heard everything. Jesse looks at him with eyes of fear, hurt, and almost..shame.
"Jesse," Dom starts. "Don't be fucking stupid. She just said she loves you, and I sure as hell can tell you're whipped. Go after that girl before she walks out of your life altogether!"
Jesse stands still for about a half-second and then takes off running after me. He can run pretty fast so he makes it to me before I get near my car. When he reaches me, I'm still crying silently. Wet, salty tears trail down my cheeks and my vision is blurred. He turns me around to face him and wipes my tears away with his slightly callused thumbs and his shirttail. Jess holds me close and kisses me. I go loose for a second, caught in the moment, but then feel myself tense up once again. "Jess..we.I..can't. I'm sorry. I'm not strong enough to take the risks." I turn away and start to walk to my car once again. He stares, watching me go and then trudges back to the house, completely dejected, rejected, unwilling to face Dominic.
Jesse goes inside and I double back, sinking to the ground in front of their house, my back against the concrete wall, guarding their lawn from the sidewalk. My knees are pulled to my chest, as it starts to rain. I just sit there shaking, miserable, in so much pain that I might as well have been stabbed and the knife been twisted round and round in the wound. I feel so stupid for having done this because I already do feel like I'm going to die. Now it's partially my pride that won't let me go back. I just feel so incredibly retarded because it really doesn't make any sense what I did. I didn't want to take the risk of having my heart broken, but breaking up with him immediately did that.
"Shit!" I say to myself. I had left my sunglasses with Dom! Slowly, I rise and walk up the stairs, gently knocking on the door, only half-hoping someone can hear me.
Dom answers, holding the glasses playfully. He knew I would come back for them.
"Thanks," I whisper. I give him a quick hug. "Thanks for everything, being so welcoming." I turn away, walking out the door.
"Jesse fell for you, you know." I stop at his rough voice. "He's head over heels and I don't even think he fully knows how deep his feelings run. I can just tell. No one takes his beanie and lives. Please don't do this Gin." Silence ensues and then the door shuts gently.
I partially walk down the stairs, giving little gasps for air. Suddenly, I do a 180 and run up to the door, throwing it open. I storm into the house, my eyes darting all over the downstairs, looking for that familiar beanie.
I see him standing there with Leon in the kitchen, deep in conversation looking so perfect. Sharp pain shoots through my heart. The music's blaring and everyone's in his own world, but Letty sees me come in.
"Hey Gin. Didn't expect to see you here." She smiles.
"Letty, now's not the best time to talk." I say a little more curtly than I mean to.
I head into the kitchen soaking, shivering, and completely in turmoil. Jesse's back is to me, but Leon starts to speak. "Dawg.." he says.
~Jesse's POV~
She quickly taps me on the shoulder. I turn around confused to see her at all, and to see her soaking wet. She looks at me for a moment and then at Leon.
"Sorry Leon." She says as she lightly pushes him on the chest just to move him a little away from me. "I'm sorry..." she whispers, kissing me for only a second, because I don't kiss back, and then grabs my hat, puts it on her head and walks out the back door, into the backyard and the rain.
I'm very confused, a little ticked off by this time, thinking, * She breaks my heart and then takes my favorite hat? Who the fuck does this chick think she is? *
I follow her out into the rain. "Gin, you can' t have my fucking hat," I almost spit, knowing very fucking well she can have whatever she wants from me. I reach out my hand to take it off her head, but she grabs my wrist and pulls me back to the stairs leading out the rear of the house so she's standing even with me.
Quietly, she whispers again, "I'm so sorry. I feel so stupid for having done all of this because the whole reason was so I wouldn't get hurt, not even thinking of you, and I screwed myself because the moment I broke up with you I did get hurt." She babbles.
"You gotta take a little dirt to keep what you love." I say reminding her of the song she was singing along to on the beach.
"It's worth it to you?" She asks, incredibly surprised. I sheepishly nod my head. A great sigh escapes her lips and she smiles her incredibly smile. It lights up her whole face, and mine with it. She grabs my shirt and pulls me forcefully close. She places her left hand on the back of my neck and head, and pulls me into a kiss. My hands immediately go to her face and she wraps her arms tightly around my waist. Our kiss is at first gentle, but long- awaited passion creeps in and our roughness surprises us both. We're trying to get as close to each other as possible.
"Gin, I...I love you. It's.just, it's hard for me to say, cuz..cuz I've never been in love before." I blurt blushing slightly, still scared to say it even though I know she loves me, and then a huge grin takes over my face.
"I told you I was a mental case. I really am. I don't know what anyone sees in me."
"Yeah....and I told you......you're my mental case, always will be. There's no escaping now, cuz I'm not letting you go."
"So, you won' have a problem with my keeping your hat?" She grins playfully and I lightly nudge her shoulder because she got me to laugh. I pull her close and softly kiss her. She slips her tongue into my mouth and I put my other hand around her waist lifting her up as I walk the stairs into the house. We stand in the kitchen hugging, until she shiver again.
"Hold on for a sec." I run upstairs and return with a towel for her. Wrapping it around her, I hold her close for extra warmth. I don't want her to get sick.
I look over Gin's shoulder and Letty's in the doorway with Leon. She mouths a few words to me and does a little dance. "Someone's gonna get hooked up tonight!" My mouth drops open and my eyes widen, but I'm smiling. She puts one finger to her lips and leaves the doorway.
~REVIEWS REVIEWS REVIEWS OR YOU WON"T GET THE HOOKUP FOR A WHILE!!!! AND...... OH IT'S A DOUBLE HOOKUP BABY! SO LETTY/DOM FANS REVIEW TOO!!!!!!~