ANTI-DEPRESSANT FUNNESS!!!
randomwriter96
Disclaimer: ..*sigh* I don't own LOTR..yet.
Btw~ LOVE THE REVIEWS! Sorry for not updating, Julia. ^^; Finals are soon, so this one's a bit short. Enjoy, anyway! (Please.)
I promised to give a warning. Here it is. And you had better read it cuz I reeaaaally don't want to be blamed for giving out TTT spoilers. Unless, of course, you already read the book. Well, then, if you have, keep going and skip the warning!
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING!!!!
Ok. Now you know that this is a warning. TTT SPOILER WARNING!!!!!
For those who are deprived, spoilers mean HINTS. BIGGER THAN HINTS. Spoilers tell you everything you want to know except that you DIDN'T want to know at that exact moment.
Did that confuse you?
Actually, for this chapter, I don't think you really need a warning either.
******************************************************** [Theoden and company STILL on the way to Isengard.slowpokes.]
"MY LEGS! OH, MY LEGS! STOP! MY LEGS ARE SO TIRED! LET'S STOP!" Theoden roared with the loudness of an.elephant.
"Umm.your majesty?" Aragorn lifted an index finger.
"WHAT??"
"Err.you're riding a horse."
"What does that have to do with my legs? Hey, guy with purple socks! Take them OFF! They annoy me! What were you saying? Oh yeah. Riding horses."
"Your legs are tired HOW?."
"THEY JUST ARE!"
"Eheh.just making sure, your majesty."
"Whatever. Now go do something productive.like getting me some fillet mignon or something," the king waved his hand carelessly towards Aragorn.
"Fillet mignon?.What's that?"
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A FILLET MIGNON IS?"
"..no.."
"Idiot! Imbecile!"
"I know, your majesty."
"GOOD!"
"But I know how to make a mean squirrel stew!"
"..ew."
"Oh.well, umm, I'll go inform someone that you want your.fillet miggot.or something." Aragorn started to leave when a hail of words were thrown right at him.
"MIGNON! IT'S MIGNON! MIGNON!"
"Ow.oww.my eardrums.oww." Aragorn winced.
"EXECUTIONER!!" the king screamed.
"Uh oh.the axe isn't for me, is it?" Aragorn eyes grew to the size of dinner plates and he scampered off towards the forest, the dots on the outfit beating him on the way for interrupting their tennis game.
"BEHEAD THAT GUY WITH THE PURPLE SOCKS!" Aragorn let out a sigh of relief. Suddenly, footsteps were quickly coming Aragorn's way. It was Legolas. With purple socks on.
"HELP ME, ARAGORN!"
"YOU are the one with the purple socks?" Aragorn asked, raising one eyebrow.
"YES! JUST HELP ME!"
"Just take them off!"
"THEY WON'T COME OFF!"
"WHY did you wear them in the FIRST PLACE?"
"IT WAS DARK! I THOUGHT THEY WERE BLUE!"
"Impossible.they HAVE to come off!" Aragorn tugged on Legolas's socks. They wouldn't come off.
"TOLD YOU!"
"STOP YELLING!" Aragorn yelled.
"OK!"
"Hang on.I have a plan!"
"Uh oh." Legolas was afraid.
"Do you know how to make fillet miggot?"
"What??"
"FILLET MIGGOT!"
"FILLET MIGNON?"
"Yeah, that's it!"
"What good does that do?"
"The king wants it!"
"SO?"
"IDIOT! MAKE A GOOD ONE FOR THE KING AND HE'LL FORGIVE YOU!"
".I knew that."
"Dumbbutt. Quick! Make one!"
"Ok! Ok! First we need."
"Need what?"
"I'M GETTING THERE! We need frozen fillet mignon and a microwave."
"ARRGHH..is that how you make fillet mignon??"
"Err..all elves make it that way with all their food."
"I am going to KILL Elrond.he said his cookies were HOMEMADE..liar."
"Oh my god!" Legolas shrieked.
"I know!! And to think I was dumb enough to think they were HOMEMADE."
"No, you idiot! The executioner's coming!"
".That's the second time I've been called an idiot, today.WHEN WILL THE TORTUROUS NAME-CALLING END!?"
"I DON'T CARE!!!! WHERE'S THE FILLET MIGNON?"
"WELL IF YOU DON'T CARE, I'M NOT GOING TO HELP YOU!"
"BUT YOU SAID YOU WOULD!" Legolas retorted.
"I TAKE IT BACK, YOU IDIOT!"
"YOU DISGUSTING MORTAL!"
"YOU INSUFFICIENT ELF!"
"YOU FASHION FAILURE!" Legolas drew out his dagger.
"YOU PERFECTIONIST!" Aragorn drew out his sword and swung it back to gain power to hit Legolas when THUMP!
"What was that?" Legolas asked.
"Eh?" Aragorn looked behind him. It was the executioner.
"Aragorn!! You're my savior! You knocked him out with your butter knife!" Legolas jumped up and down in joy.
"SWORD!"
"BUTTER KNIFE!"
"YOU STUBBORN GIT!"
"YOU PATHETIC IDIOT!"
"Now that's the THIRD time today..I've had ENOUGH of this I tell you."
Meanwhile.
Gandalf tapped the hot pink video tape depressingly, "Didn't ANYONE bring a VCR and a TV with him?."
********************************************************
randomwriter96
Disclaimer: ..*sigh* I don't own LOTR..yet.
Btw~ LOVE THE REVIEWS! Sorry for not updating, Julia. ^^; Finals are soon, so this one's a bit short. Enjoy, anyway! (Please.)
I promised to give a warning. Here it is. And you had better read it cuz I reeaaaally don't want to be blamed for giving out TTT spoilers. Unless, of course, you already read the book. Well, then, if you have, keep going and skip the warning!
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING!!!!
Ok. Now you know that this is a warning. TTT SPOILER WARNING!!!!!
For those who are deprived, spoilers mean HINTS. BIGGER THAN HINTS. Spoilers tell you everything you want to know except that you DIDN'T want to know at that exact moment.
Did that confuse you?
Actually, for this chapter, I don't think you really need a warning either.
******************************************************** [Theoden and company STILL on the way to Isengard.slowpokes.]
"MY LEGS! OH, MY LEGS! STOP! MY LEGS ARE SO TIRED! LET'S STOP!" Theoden roared with the loudness of an.elephant.
"Umm.your majesty?" Aragorn lifted an index finger.
"WHAT??"
"Err.you're riding a horse."
"What does that have to do with my legs? Hey, guy with purple socks! Take them OFF! They annoy me! What were you saying? Oh yeah. Riding horses."
"Your legs are tired HOW?."
"THEY JUST ARE!"
"Eheh.just making sure, your majesty."
"Whatever. Now go do something productive.like getting me some fillet mignon or something," the king waved his hand carelessly towards Aragorn.
"Fillet mignon?.What's that?"
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A FILLET MIGNON IS?"
"..no.."
"Idiot! Imbecile!"
"I know, your majesty."
"GOOD!"
"But I know how to make a mean squirrel stew!"
"..ew."
"Oh.well, umm, I'll go inform someone that you want your.fillet miggot.or something." Aragorn started to leave when a hail of words were thrown right at him.
"MIGNON! IT'S MIGNON! MIGNON!"
"Ow.oww.my eardrums.oww." Aragorn winced.
"EXECUTIONER!!" the king screamed.
"Uh oh.the axe isn't for me, is it?" Aragorn eyes grew to the size of dinner plates and he scampered off towards the forest, the dots on the outfit beating him on the way for interrupting their tennis game.
"BEHEAD THAT GUY WITH THE PURPLE SOCKS!" Aragorn let out a sigh of relief. Suddenly, footsteps were quickly coming Aragorn's way. It was Legolas. With purple socks on.
"HELP ME, ARAGORN!"
"YOU are the one with the purple socks?" Aragorn asked, raising one eyebrow.
"YES! JUST HELP ME!"
"Just take them off!"
"THEY WON'T COME OFF!"
"WHY did you wear them in the FIRST PLACE?"
"IT WAS DARK! I THOUGHT THEY WERE BLUE!"
"Impossible.they HAVE to come off!" Aragorn tugged on Legolas's socks. They wouldn't come off.
"TOLD YOU!"
"STOP YELLING!" Aragorn yelled.
"OK!"
"Hang on.I have a plan!"
"Uh oh." Legolas was afraid.
"Do you know how to make fillet miggot?"
"What??"
"FILLET MIGGOT!"
"FILLET MIGNON?"
"Yeah, that's it!"
"What good does that do?"
"The king wants it!"
"SO?"
"IDIOT! MAKE A GOOD ONE FOR THE KING AND HE'LL FORGIVE YOU!"
".I knew that."
"Dumbbutt. Quick! Make one!"
"Ok! Ok! First we need."
"Need what?"
"I'M GETTING THERE! We need frozen fillet mignon and a microwave."
"ARRGHH..is that how you make fillet mignon??"
"Err..all elves make it that way with all their food."
"I am going to KILL Elrond.he said his cookies were HOMEMADE..liar."
"Oh my god!" Legolas shrieked.
"I know!! And to think I was dumb enough to think they were HOMEMADE."
"No, you idiot! The executioner's coming!"
".That's the second time I've been called an idiot, today.WHEN WILL THE TORTUROUS NAME-CALLING END!?"
"I DON'T CARE!!!! WHERE'S THE FILLET MIGNON?"
"WELL IF YOU DON'T CARE, I'M NOT GOING TO HELP YOU!"
"BUT YOU SAID YOU WOULD!" Legolas retorted.
"I TAKE IT BACK, YOU IDIOT!"
"YOU DISGUSTING MORTAL!"
"YOU INSUFFICIENT ELF!"
"YOU FASHION FAILURE!" Legolas drew out his dagger.
"YOU PERFECTIONIST!" Aragorn drew out his sword and swung it back to gain power to hit Legolas when THUMP!
"What was that?" Legolas asked.
"Eh?" Aragorn looked behind him. It was the executioner.
"Aragorn!! You're my savior! You knocked him out with your butter knife!" Legolas jumped up and down in joy.
"SWORD!"
"BUTTER KNIFE!"
"YOU STUBBORN GIT!"
"YOU PATHETIC IDIOT!"
"Now that's the THIRD time today..I've had ENOUGH of this I tell you."
Meanwhile.
Gandalf tapped the hot pink video tape depressingly, "Didn't ANYONE bring a VCR and a TV with him?."
********************************************************