Adaline
I do NOT own Zoids...
~*~**~
Fiona sat on the floor. It smelled of antiseptic and band-aids. She closed her eyes and heaved out a sigh. She looked at each of the test strips that were scattered restlessly on the floor. Each said positive. Each one of them. There wasn't even one to give hope that it wasn't true. They all pointed to one possibility. Fiona opened her eyes and gazed up at the ceiling tiles, suddenly curious how many small black dots were in each ceiling tile.
An aggravated rap came from the door. 'Fiona! You're taking all day!' Fiona made no hurry to clean up the test strips and hide the box. Moonbay needed no knowledge of this. 'Fiona!' the impatient female roared.
'Shizuka ni, Moonbay!' Fiona yelled angrily. 'Baka.' Fiona whispered under her breath.
'I heard that!' said Moonbay kicking the door open with her turquoise cowboy boots. 'You'd think that you're trying to look like me in here!' said Moonbay snickering. 'Darling, I missed you so much~! Its been ages since we last saw each other!' Moonbay said to her reflection. Fiona rolled her eyes impatiently as she gathered her brush from the floor. Moonbay began to take the rubber bands that suspended her hair as Fiona crawled out of the bathroom. 'Sayonara!' Moonbay called after her.
Fiona lay on the bed. She lay on her side, picking the wallpaper off of the wall. She kept one hand resting on her abdomen, as if it might run away if she let it go. A plan for the future is what she needed. She couldn't stay here anymore, especially with what was going to happen. But dare she interrupt Van's career? Dare she pull him away from Zoid Piloting to raise a family? She shook her head. Although she loved Van with all of her heart, she didn't see what was so beautiful about Zoid Piloting. A warm feeling grew inside of her when she thought of the child. What would she name it? Would it be a boy or a girl? Would she be a good mother? Fiona turned on her back. Everything seemed so far off...so impossible to reach.
Fiona lay in that bed for hours. Hour after hour, she got no sleep. Hour after hour she pondered her incredeculous fate. 'Hey Fiona, you seem a little out of it today...are you sure you don't want to go back to the nurse?' said Van. Fiona sat up on her bed to face Van.
'Van, that nurse is a fat cow. I don't want to go back to her.' Van smiled.
'Alright, well at least tell me what's on your mind.' he said.
Fiona sighed. 'Its-' did she dare say it? 'It's nothing Van, just a stomach ache.' Fiona shook her head. She couldn't keep lying like this. If she couldn't tell Van, whom could she tell?
'Van! Beat it! I have to talk to Fiona!' Moonbay said. Van turned his attention towards Fiona.
'Are you sure? Are you sure its just a stomach ache?' Fiona glanced over Van's shoulder towards Moonbay who appeared to be fuming.
'Y-yeah Van...just a stomach ache.' Van smiled and ruffled her hair as if she was still the child she was four years ago. Moonbay gave him a fuming glance as he passed.
Moonbay held up a white test strip and waved it in Fiona's face.
'Explain this Tomodachi.' she said accusingly. Fiona's face turned a magnificent shade of red as she grabbed for the strip. Moonbay got so close to Fiona's face, she could felt herself humbled under the eyes of her companion.
'Are you pregnant, chairudo?' Fiona backed herself away from Moonbay's stare with unintentional force.
'Masaka, Moonbay! Masaka!' Moonbay grabbed Fiona's shirt and pulled her towards her.
'Ok then, Chairudo. Who is the father?'
Something felt heavy in Fiona's mouth. It took a few minutes before she realized it was her tongue and was able to answer.
'N-nani?' she stuttered finally.
'You heard me. Who's the father? I swear, if it is that Thomas fella, I'm gonna--'
'It's not Thomas...its...' Fiona's voice seemed to drift off into the wind as her words disappeared. A sudden burst of anger overtook her.
'Why do you care?' she asked angrily. Despite her attempt, Moonbay did not back down.
'Fiona, you're going to have a chairudo and you're still a chairudo yourself!' said Moonbay in her best I'm-your-elder-so-you-better-listen-to-me tone.
'I don't have to listen to this.' said Fiona angrily as she got up and started to leave. Moonbay grabbed angrily at her arm.
'Chairudo--'
'And stop calling me a child! I'm no child!' the Native American woman blazed brilliantly. She heaved Fiona back and let her go, leaving her stumbling backwards. She then said quietly.
'Van's the father isn't he? Isn't he? Tell me chairudo!' Fiona's face twisted into an unfamiliar scowl.
'If you two girls are done kissing, I suggest you come down to the cafeteria. Van needs to tell us something.' Moonbay and Fiona looked towards the door and saw the disappearing shadow of Irvine.
'Baka.' scowled Moonbay as she left Fiona alone in the dark room.
Fiona locked the door as soon as Moonbay stepped out.
'Chairudo! Chairudo! Open this door!' Moonbay banged heavily on the door. And then a heavy silence settled between the two women. 'Fine. Chairudo, just remember who you are.' Fiona listened to the evil clicking of her boots as she descended down the hallway. Fiona leaned against the door and sank down. How could Moonbay know her so well? How could she know what she was going to do? Fiona shook her head. She didn't know. They all knew nothing.
Fiona stripped off all of her clothes angrily. She lay on Van's bed, in her underwear. She turned over and inhaled his scent; it was a scent of fresh starts and new beginnings. But the end of all. Fiona let the tears slip from her eyes and onto the pillow. She tried to imagine what Van would say if he was here. 'Laying in your underwear on a bed is not going to solve your problems! You gotta get up and do something!' she said to herself instinctively. She put on a light blue dress, the kind that simple country girls wore, before they were married. It hung loosely on her shoulders and spread out at her knees. The sleeves were torn as if they'd been used before. From where this dress came from was out of her knowledge...in fact the whole thing was a blur.
'Geez.... I train in the military for four years and here I am. A guard, pressing a button all day, and for minimum wage too!' said the Guard. He pushed the button again and again and watched the restricting pole go up and down and up and down. A blur of light blue caught his eye. 'What the-' He stepped out of the box cautiously, watching for another flash of blue. 'Hey, you! Girl!' he grabbed her wrist. 'Do you know this a restricted area?' The girl kept looking down; the Guard guessed she was too ashamed to say anything. He opened the gate. 'Get outta here! And don't let me catch you here again!' he said heaving her outside.
Fiona smiled. Never had she been so happy to have been kicked out of anything. 'Go on! Go back to your town!' the guard yelled as he retreated into his hut. Fiona pulled the hood of her cloak over her head and ran into the uncertain darkness that awaited her.
"Ugh! Where could she've gone!"? Roared Van, sweeping off all of the utensils on the table.
"Van, being mad isn't going to help find her," said Irvine coolly.
"Ah, what do you know." he said, walking away.
"He's right Van, yelling won't bring Fiona back." Thomas said. He looked at Moonbay, who was gazing at the ceiling and smiling. "What are you smiling about?"
"She's looooong gone," said Moonbay, chuckling.
"And you find this funny?" Irvine asked angrily.
"Where's she gone? Tell me!" Van yelled, grabbing Moonbay's shirt.
"Relax Van," she said pushing him away. "She'll come back."
"Come back? Come back when?" asked Thomas.
"She's naive" Moonbay shrugged. "She's afraid, she has no one to turn to, or no where to go. Eventually, she'll come back."
"What do you mean? She has me! She has us!" yelled Van.
"Hey, I didn't run away" Moonbay held her hands up innocently. "Don't go yelling at me."
"Do you know where she is?" Van asked again.
"Not really, but I know generally where." said Moonbay.
"Where?"
"I told you, she'll come back."
"I want to find her now!"
"Van, I wouldn't go looking for her. This is a lesson that she has to learn on her own."
"Moonbay! She could get hurt!" Irvine protested.
"Fiona can fend for herself."
"No she can't!"
"If you won't have faith in her, then she won't have faith in herself, Van. Besides, it's all your fault she went away." Said Moonbay angrily.
"I didn't do anything. Maybe if she wasn't so stupid--"
"Don't call her stupid! She's just scared!" Moonbay yelled getting up.
"Why else would she've run away then? Intelligent people just don't run into the desert!"
"Well if you hadn't gone and gotten her pregnant she wouldn't have!" Moonbay shouted. She immediately clasped her hands over her mouth. And looked away. Van looked at her as if she were a crazy woman.
"What-what?"
Moonbay hesitated, and then said quietly. "She's scared. She didn't want to take you away from Zoid Piloting. She loves you Van. That's why she left."
Thomas flushed an angry red and left the room, in disbelief.
"You've messed up big time, Van." Irvine said shaking his head.
"It can't be," said Van shaking his head. "I've got to go find her." he started to run out of the room.
"Hold on there, tiger!" Moonbay grabbed his arm. "If you go after her she'll feel even more guilty. Let her come back on her own."
Van scowled and walked away.
"Think he'll go after her?" Irvine asked.
"Duh!" said Moonbay. "Wasn't that my implied message?" Irvine looked at her in shock.
"Moonbay, I'll never understand you," he said.
"That's alright, Cowboy." she blew him a kiss. "I always knew I was too good for you."
Never in her life had Fiona been so cold. Snow fell on the grassy hills. How could it be so hot and so cold just a few miles apart? She shivered and walked on. The white flakes stuck to her cloak and her bare legs.
It was so cold...
As she stood on top of a hill, she saw dim lights. A cottage? A town? She walked on, the snow biting away at her bare feet. Yes, it was a town. She grasped her lower body.
"You here that, little one? We're going to be alright after all." she spoke to her unborn baby.
Knocking on a door, a rough faced young couple opened the door. They looked so tired, but so kind.
"Won't you come in out of the cold?" they asked. They gave her hot chocolate and sat at the kitchen table with her. There house was simple, but it had an essence of love in it. It held something greater then the laughter of children, but the love of many years to come.
"So, what's your story?" the woman asked. She had stringy hair and looked tired.
"I ran. I ran away."
"From home?"
"No, from my--" What could she call Van? A boyfriend? A lover? A friend? A one-night stand?
"I understand." said the woman.
"I was scared. I wanted to get away." Fiona said squeezing the mug.
"Why were you scared?" asked the man. He looked a little older then the woman and his eyes were a worn green.
"I'm--I'm pregnant," she said, her voice quivering. A silence of understanding passed between them.
"Did the father leave?" asked the man.
"No, no. He's a soldier in the Guardian Force."
"Ah, a soldier."
"He's so wonderful though. He would've made a wonderful father." Fiona said dreamily.
"What's his name, sweetheart?"
"Van. Van Flyheight."
"No! Your kidding! The same Flyheight that defeated the DeathSaurer! You're carrying his child?"
Fiona smiled weakly. "Afraid so."
"Well, you're welcome here as long as you want to stay."
"May I ask a personal question?" Fiona asked quickly.
"Sure."
"Why, I mean, why don't you have any children?"
The tired woman looked sad. "I can't have children," she said quietly. "Your so lucky."
"I don't think so..."
"Good night Miss." said the man who took his wife's hand.
As they left, they turned out the light.
I am lucky, thought Fiona. I have Van's memory, and that's all I need of him now.
It had been months since Fiona's disappearance. Van didn't go out looking for her.
Fiona stayed with the couple for four months. She helped the woman, whose name was Adrienne, with the cooking and cleaning. Fiona grew and grew. Until one night, she woke up screaming. Adrienne and her husband rushed her to the midwife.
She gave birth to a small infant whom she named, Adaline Vanessa.
"Where is she?" Van said gazing out a window.
"Van, she's going to come back." Moonbay said gently. "She loves you and she would never leave you."
"Then where the hell is she?" Van yelled walking away angrily.
"I don't know..." Moonbay whispered.
"Miss Adrienne." Fiona walked into her kitchen, carrying her child.
"Hello, Fiona, dear." she said.
"I want to ask you a favor," said Fiona quietly.
"What is it?" asked her husband, walking into the room.
"I'm giving Adaline up for adoption." Fiona sad slowly, she was practically choking on her tears.
"I want you to take her," she said.
"Take her? But, your doing such a good job of raising her!"
"No! I'm only sixteen years old. I can't support a child. I'd," she paused. "I'd like to come back for her, after a awhile."
"How long will you be gone?"
Fiona shrugged. "Years? Months? I don't know. I want to come back for her. I want to be a mother, someday. But not now, not while I'm not ready."
"You take care, then," said Adrienne taking the baby gently.
Fiona left them in the room to use their old fashioned telephone. She phoned the base where Van was.
"Hello? Army Base 113. Laboratory 4 speaking."
"Hello? May I speak to Van Flyheight?"
"Who is this?" asked the man rudely.
"F-fiona."
"Hold, please."
There was a long silence and Fiona almost hung up. She took the receiver away from her ear to put it down when she heard a hello at the other end.
"Hello? Fiona?" Van practically yelled into the phone.
"Don't break her eardrums, moron!" Moonbay said in the background.
"Van...?" she asked softly.
"Fiona? Where are you? Where have you been?"
"I--" she stopped. "I'm in a town."
"Are you alright?" he asked softly.
"Yeah." Fiona frowned. He didn't ask about the baby yet.
"Do you want me to come get you in the liger?"
"I don't know..." said Fiona faintly.
"Fiona? What's wrong?"
Tears ran down Fiona's face. She loved this man so much, but yet he had cost her so much.
"I--I'll come back." she said.
"When? How soon?"
"I don't know. Maybe in a week."
"No, I'm coming now. Where are you?"
"I think, its Dawson Town," she said.
"What? That's more then 100 miles away! Did you walk all that way?"
"I don't know."
"Ok, I'm coming." he hung up and a dull dial tone filled her ears.
Fiona began to feel tired, just like Miss Adrienne. She gathered up her rucksack and thanked the couple.
"I'll come back little one. I promise." she said to her daughter.
She left, and immediately saw the blade liger on the outskirts of town.
He must've gotten new boosters, thought Fiona.
"Fiona?" Van asked when he came up to her.
"You look tired," he said. "Are you okay?"
Fiona nodded weakly and followed him into the Liger.
It was a long bounding journey back to the base. The world passed them and remained silent.
"Fiona--was it...I mean, was it a stillbirth?" he asked. Fiona didn't answer.
One day, thought Fiona, I'm going to go back for her. She's my daughter. One day, when Van stops fighting, I'll go back for her. Then, we can settle down. But for now, She'll just remain a memory...until someday...