ANTI-DEPRESSANT FUNNESS!!!
randomwriter96
Disclaimer: ..*sigh* I don't own LOTR..yet.
Btw~ Thankees for the reviews! :o) They were lovely.
Random FACT: I got my hair cut! Cut! Lots of it all gone. :o(
I promised to give a warning. Here it is. And you had better read it cuz I reeaaaally don't want to be blamed for giving out TTT spoilers. Unless, of course, you already read the book. Well, then, if you have, keep going and skip the warning!
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING!!!!
Ok. Now you know that this is a warning. TTT SPOILER WARNING!!!!!
For those who are deprived, spoilers mean HINTS. BIGGER THAN HINTS. Spoilers tell you everything you want to know except that you DIDN'T want to know at that exact moment.
Did that confuse you?
WARNING!
********************************************************
[On their way to the big battle!]
"Aragorn..." Legolas sleepily poked Aragorn. They had to share a tent, since there were no other spare ones left from Rohan. (And NO, NOTHING HAPPENED. Perverts.) "Ew. You have a tomato mush stain. Anyway, wakey wakey!" Snort. Aragorn just rolled over and continued snoring.
"Mrmhmm..." He snorted.
"Sorry, Aragorn, but don't worry. I'll buy you hearing aids later," Legolas cleared his throat. "ARAGOORN!! WAKE UP!!"
"AHHHH! LEGOLAS! WHAT IS IT?? ARE WE BEING ATTACKED? SAVE ME!" Aragorn shrieked, trying to jump out of his sleeping bag, only to find that he was stuck in it.
"No..we're not being attacked. It's breakfast time," Legolas brushed his hair then tossed it (like in the Pantene Pro-V commercials!).
"What? There's an infested lime? Where?" Aragorn dug his finger in his ear. Legolas rolled his eyes, then strolled out. Aragorn frowned with a confused expression on his face. Then, he proceeded to try to free himself from his own sleeping bag. It was quite stubborn.
"Get OFF me, you..." Aragorn used some pretty colorful language after that. Still didn't work. At that precise moment, he rolled into the side of the tent, causing it to tip and snap Aragorn shut inside. Which caused Aragorn to roll around frantically.right into the campfire. Therefore, setting the tent on fire. Which caused Aragorn pain. Much pain.
10 minutes later...
A singed Aragorn finally wrenched himself out of the burned-down tent. His pink bathrobe was no longer pink. His cow slippers no longer...looking like cows. The Rohan subjects were trying their very best to bite back their giggles.
"HAHAHA!! Ahem. Sorry."
They weren't very good at it.
"You are SO lucky I had a bucket of water right next to me," Legolas loomed over the sprawled Aragorn. Aragorn let out a little cough, and then said raspily.
"Yeah, I guess...Oh no..."
"What? Do you have a severe burn? I can treat that, you know...I'm very good at-" Legolas started.
"Shut up, you ass. It's the bathrobe...Arwen gave it to me...she's going to kill me..."
"Oh. Well, don't forget to invite me to the funeral," Legolas said cheerily, then picked up his bags and walked towards Air-rod (his borrowed horse, in case you forgot). Suddenly.
"ARRRGH! GIMLI, DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!" Aragorn shrieked.
"Gimli?" Legolas frowned. "I don't recall him coming with us..." ZOOOP! Gimli suddenly appeared and held his axe up.
"You don't...RECALL?"
"Err...of course I do!" Legolas grinned nervously.
"Yay!" Gimli said and BLOOP, he disappeared somewhere.
"Woah...that conditioner is really getting to my head." Legolas blinked furiously, being quite confused. WHOOSH! "Huh? What was that?"
"It's me! And don't you DARE look!" Aragorn said, from behind a clump of trees.
"Why ever not?" Legolas asked, not getting the point.
"I'm CHANGING, you moron," Aragorn sighed exasperatingly.
"Okaaaay, I DIDN'T need to know that..."
"What's wrong with changing?"
"Images, Aragorn, images,"
"Perverted elf,"
"PERVERTED?? I'm the purest elf on Middle Earth!"
"Ha! Pure, my ass. So you're a virgin, huh?"
"Yes, and I will STAY a virgin until marriage," (much to the disappointment of many hopeful rabid fangirls).
"God, you make me sick," Aragorn rolled his eyes and stepped out from behind the trees. (FULLY CLOTHED, perverted people).
"Why?"
"NEVER MIND, Legolas..." Aragorn sighed, then mumbled, "you blonde ditz."
"I HEARD THAT!"
"And what are you gonna do about it? Throw a BRUSH at me? Oh no.I'm so AFRAID..." CLONK! A brush came flying out of nowhere and connected with the back of Aragorn's head. "OWWW! I didn't mean that!"
"Suuuure...now give me my brush back!" Legolas demanded.
"No way in hell," Aragorn stuck his tongue out at Legolas.
"GIVE IT TO ME!"
"NO!"
"YES!"
"SHUT UP, YOU TWO! ARE YOU COMING OR NOT?" Theoden marched over and grabbed the brush.
"Err...yeah," Legolas tried to remain calm and dignified outside (while inside, he was trying his very very best to not reach over and snatch his brush, then laugh in Aragorn's face).
"Good. Heeey, this is a nice brush. I like it," Theoden walked off, clutching Legolas's brush.
"Noooooo..." Legolas fell on his knees and whined.
"HAHAHAHA!" Aragorn smirked, laughing in Legolas's face.
"Shut up, you," Legolas glared at him, then grabbed another brush from one of his mysterious pockets, furiously brushing his hair while walking towards Air-rod.
"Wha-! How can-? How many brushes can one guy bring with him??"
"I heard that! I brought six, in case you wanted to know!" a far-off voice was heard. (Obviously Legolas's).
"Damn Elven ears,"
"I HEARD THAT TOO!"
"What am I supposed to do? Not talk at all?!"
"YES,"
"Errg," Aragorn fumed while striding towards Bob (HIS borrowed horse, in case you also forgot). "Eh? Bob? What happened to you?!" Bob stood there, silent and edgy as always, but he was somehow...shiny. Very shiny. Shiny like you've never seen a horse shiny before. Bob just blinked.
"Theoden...what happened to Bob?..."
"Eh? Who's Bob? Ohhh! Hello Bob! What's wrong with Bob?"
"He's...SHINY. Like Legolas's hair in the- Wait a minute...LEGOLAS!!!"
"YEAH?"
"What did you do to Bob??"
"JUST A LITTLE SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONING! WHY?"
"He's JUST a little SHINIER than usual!"
"THAT'S FINE! DOESN'T HE LOOK PRETTY?"
"No, not really!"
"ARE YOU DISSING THE WAY I WASH HAIR?"
"No...but-!"
"FINE, IF YOU WANT TO CRITICIZE, DON'T CRITICIZE AT ALL! I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU ANYMORE!"
"...Well, that doesn't make sense..."
"IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!"
"STOP YELLING IN MY EAR!" Theoden mounted his horse and shouted.
"Sorry," Aragorn mounted Bob.
"SORRY!" Legolas yelled from far-off.
"SORRY WHAT?" Theoden was seeing red.
"UMM...SORRY A HUNDRED TIMES?"
"NO!"
"UMM...SORRY A THOUSAND TIMES?"
"NO!"
"UMM..."
"IT'S 'SORRY, YOUR MAJESTY'!"
"OH! SORRY!"
Theoden decided right then and there that once this whole battle was over with, he was going to make Legolas scrub every room in the Golden Hall with nothing but a toothbrush.
********************************************************
randomwriter96
Disclaimer: ..*sigh* I don't own LOTR..yet.
Btw~ Thankees for the reviews! :o) They were lovely.
Random FACT: I got my hair cut! Cut! Lots of it all gone. :o(
I promised to give a warning. Here it is. And you had better read it cuz I reeaaaally don't want to be blamed for giving out TTT spoilers. Unless, of course, you already read the book. Well, then, if you have, keep going and skip the warning!
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING!!!!
Ok. Now you know that this is a warning. TTT SPOILER WARNING!!!!!
For those who are deprived, spoilers mean HINTS. BIGGER THAN HINTS. Spoilers tell you everything you want to know except that you DIDN'T want to know at that exact moment.
Did that confuse you?
WARNING!
********************************************************
[On their way to the big battle!]
"Aragorn..." Legolas sleepily poked Aragorn. They had to share a tent, since there were no other spare ones left from Rohan. (And NO, NOTHING HAPPENED. Perverts.) "Ew. You have a tomato mush stain. Anyway, wakey wakey!" Snort. Aragorn just rolled over and continued snoring.
"Mrmhmm..." He snorted.
"Sorry, Aragorn, but don't worry. I'll buy you hearing aids later," Legolas cleared his throat. "ARAGOORN!! WAKE UP!!"
"AHHHH! LEGOLAS! WHAT IS IT?? ARE WE BEING ATTACKED? SAVE ME!" Aragorn shrieked, trying to jump out of his sleeping bag, only to find that he was stuck in it.
"No..we're not being attacked. It's breakfast time," Legolas brushed his hair then tossed it (like in the Pantene Pro-V commercials!).
"What? There's an infested lime? Where?" Aragorn dug his finger in his ear. Legolas rolled his eyes, then strolled out. Aragorn frowned with a confused expression on his face. Then, he proceeded to try to free himself from his own sleeping bag. It was quite stubborn.
"Get OFF me, you..." Aragorn used some pretty colorful language after that. Still didn't work. At that precise moment, he rolled into the side of the tent, causing it to tip and snap Aragorn shut inside. Which caused Aragorn to roll around frantically.right into the campfire. Therefore, setting the tent on fire. Which caused Aragorn pain. Much pain.
10 minutes later...
A singed Aragorn finally wrenched himself out of the burned-down tent. His pink bathrobe was no longer pink. His cow slippers no longer...looking like cows. The Rohan subjects were trying their very best to bite back their giggles.
"HAHAHA!! Ahem. Sorry."
They weren't very good at it.
"You are SO lucky I had a bucket of water right next to me," Legolas loomed over the sprawled Aragorn. Aragorn let out a little cough, and then said raspily.
"Yeah, I guess...Oh no..."
"What? Do you have a severe burn? I can treat that, you know...I'm very good at-" Legolas started.
"Shut up, you ass. It's the bathrobe...Arwen gave it to me...she's going to kill me..."
"Oh. Well, don't forget to invite me to the funeral," Legolas said cheerily, then picked up his bags and walked towards Air-rod (his borrowed horse, in case you forgot). Suddenly.
"ARRRGH! GIMLI, DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!" Aragorn shrieked.
"Gimli?" Legolas frowned. "I don't recall him coming with us..." ZOOOP! Gimli suddenly appeared and held his axe up.
"You don't...RECALL?"
"Err...of course I do!" Legolas grinned nervously.
"Yay!" Gimli said and BLOOP, he disappeared somewhere.
"Woah...that conditioner is really getting to my head." Legolas blinked furiously, being quite confused. WHOOSH! "Huh? What was that?"
"It's me! And don't you DARE look!" Aragorn said, from behind a clump of trees.
"Why ever not?" Legolas asked, not getting the point.
"I'm CHANGING, you moron," Aragorn sighed exasperatingly.
"Okaaaay, I DIDN'T need to know that..."
"What's wrong with changing?"
"Images, Aragorn, images,"
"Perverted elf,"
"PERVERTED?? I'm the purest elf on Middle Earth!"
"Ha! Pure, my ass. So you're a virgin, huh?"
"Yes, and I will STAY a virgin until marriage," (much to the disappointment of many hopeful rabid fangirls).
"God, you make me sick," Aragorn rolled his eyes and stepped out from behind the trees. (FULLY CLOTHED, perverted people).
"Why?"
"NEVER MIND, Legolas..." Aragorn sighed, then mumbled, "you blonde ditz."
"I HEARD THAT!"
"And what are you gonna do about it? Throw a BRUSH at me? Oh no.I'm so AFRAID..." CLONK! A brush came flying out of nowhere and connected with the back of Aragorn's head. "OWWW! I didn't mean that!"
"Suuuure...now give me my brush back!" Legolas demanded.
"No way in hell," Aragorn stuck his tongue out at Legolas.
"GIVE IT TO ME!"
"NO!"
"YES!"
"SHUT UP, YOU TWO! ARE YOU COMING OR NOT?" Theoden marched over and grabbed the brush.
"Err...yeah," Legolas tried to remain calm and dignified outside (while inside, he was trying his very very best to not reach over and snatch his brush, then laugh in Aragorn's face).
"Good. Heeey, this is a nice brush. I like it," Theoden walked off, clutching Legolas's brush.
"Noooooo..." Legolas fell on his knees and whined.
"HAHAHAHA!" Aragorn smirked, laughing in Legolas's face.
"Shut up, you," Legolas glared at him, then grabbed another brush from one of his mysterious pockets, furiously brushing his hair while walking towards Air-rod.
"Wha-! How can-? How many brushes can one guy bring with him??"
"I heard that! I brought six, in case you wanted to know!" a far-off voice was heard. (Obviously Legolas's).
"Damn Elven ears,"
"I HEARD THAT TOO!"
"What am I supposed to do? Not talk at all?!"
"YES,"
"Errg," Aragorn fumed while striding towards Bob (HIS borrowed horse, in case you also forgot). "Eh? Bob? What happened to you?!" Bob stood there, silent and edgy as always, but he was somehow...shiny. Very shiny. Shiny like you've never seen a horse shiny before. Bob just blinked.
"Theoden...what happened to Bob?..."
"Eh? Who's Bob? Ohhh! Hello Bob! What's wrong with Bob?"
"He's...SHINY. Like Legolas's hair in the- Wait a minute...LEGOLAS!!!"
"YEAH?"
"What did you do to Bob??"
"JUST A LITTLE SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONING! WHY?"
"He's JUST a little SHINIER than usual!"
"THAT'S FINE! DOESN'T HE LOOK PRETTY?"
"No, not really!"
"ARE YOU DISSING THE WAY I WASH HAIR?"
"No...but-!"
"FINE, IF YOU WANT TO CRITICIZE, DON'T CRITICIZE AT ALL! I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU ANYMORE!"
"...Well, that doesn't make sense..."
"IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!"
"STOP YELLING IN MY EAR!" Theoden mounted his horse and shouted.
"Sorry," Aragorn mounted Bob.
"SORRY!" Legolas yelled from far-off.
"SORRY WHAT?" Theoden was seeing red.
"UMM...SORRY A HUNDRED TIMES?"
"NO!"
"UMM...SORRY A THOUSAND TIMES?"
"NO!"
"UMM..."
"IT'S 'SORRY, YOUR MAJESTY'!"
"OH! SORRY!"
Theoden decided right then and there that once this whole battle was over with, he was going to make Legolas scrub every room in the Golden Hall with nothing but a toothbrush.
********************************************************