Best of Me: Chapter 6
Hannya
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters or settings and, with medication and counseling, I'm learning to live with that. Now shoo!
Warnings: And here I go running with the lack of serious. Slash? Bad jokes?
A/N: What? This chapter took forever? *fidgets nervously* Well, you see, there was this squirrel and a bomb and, um.*runs away quickly*.
Saaa, this chapter sucks..(
CHAPTER 6
It was funny, really. Snape had assumed that his time as Potion's Professor to years of clumsy talentless wizard spawn had been punishment enough for his past Deatheater transgressions.
He was, obviously, very very wrong.
"Tell me again why this is necessary?" The victim in question grumbled, acidity lost as his newly found son affixed a rather ridiculous fake mustache to his stiff upper lip.
Harry grinned, "Because we can't go to Diagon's Ally as us and we *need* our school supplies."
Oh yes, this whole humiliating procedure was so two sixth years could go pick up new books and quills. Dark eyes darted involuntarily to the blond currently donning a floppy hat and stylish tinted half-moon glasses. "And while I can't use magic outside of school, the two of you are simply hopeless at glamour charms. Hence the disguises."
Silently cursing himself and his charges, Snape had little choice but to sit there and suffer as his hair was tied back in a ponytail and his robes traded for a loud tie-dye version. The fruit of his loins was slightly better off, using oversize prescription sunglasses and a muggle baseball cap with an anti-Deatheater patch sewn on to hide his notable infamous features.
Oh yes, no one would recognize them. Mostly because no one would believe that Snape would be caught dead in such a get up. Ha! If only..
And so, now suitably different from their usual appearances, the abused older wizard reached for the floo powder, almost missing the girlish squeak of protest from his child. "What now?!"
"We were actually going to, uh, portkey there, " the boy savior flushed behind his shades and pointedly ignored the snickering Slytherin behind him.
"He hates floo powder, " Draco sneered, getting an elbow to the ribs for his trouble. "But I think *it* hates *him* more."
Snape frowned. Floo powder? Who in a freezing hell had Floo Powder issues?! "Then how on Earth did you end up at the mansion?" Harry suddenly found his shoes very interesting as he cautiously answering,
"Well, Floo powder.but the look on your face kind of made it worth it."
The new school year hadn't even begun and all ready, his frayed nerves were twitching. This did not bode well for the first years. Draco eyed the head of his house cautiously. "Maybe we should go now." His Gryffindor counterpart nodded quickly and reached for the aforementioned port key before his parent spontaneously combusted.
"This day just gets better and better, " Snape muttered to himself, shifting uncomfortably in one of the pink/gold chair things in the fitting room of Madam Malkin's. The two former teenage enemies were chatting away like old gossips while he merely sat and enjoyed his 'break' from carrying 'his share' of the book bags. Maybe Voldemort would call for him or something.. Even Cruciatus would be better than this!
".So then I said, 'or should I say 'Dad'' and BOOM he was on the floor, out like a light."
Okay, forget never having any more children. At this point he was seriously contemplating giving up on women altogether!
Karma, apparently bored with torturing every other poor schmuck on the planet, chose that moment to interrupt his musings as a stranger nearly knocked him out of his chair in the rush to escape what had to be rabid wolves at the very least.
The high-pitched squeals of adolescent schoolgirls pierced the already chaotic air as the interloper hurriedly locked the door behind him and barricaded it with the matching chair. Snape winced in sympathy. Rabid wolves would have been a kindness. No, the predators in this case were far far deadlier.
Rabid fangirls.
Hogwart's finest by the sound of it.
Long unused instinct kicked in and with the grace of a large and slightly slimy ballerina, the Potions Master had secured the door with one very uncomfortable pink chair jammed under the doorknob. The next few minutes were, thankfully, a blur. Fangirls, while frighteningly obsessive, were unwilling to inflict actual property damage despite the tastiness of their prey and retreated after a few half-hearted thumps and muttered spells. . That done, the disguised gang turned to stare disbelievingly at the newcomer, exclamations flying like bullets.
"Moony!"
"Professor?!"
"LUPIN!"
Already harassed, the werewolf in question merely snapped back, or, rather, *would* have snapped back had he not found himself with a chest full of Potter. "Harry!"
Snape Sr. and Malfoy Jr. exchanged a look, quickly, that included a sneer followed immediately by wary acceptance of the returning Marauder...for Harry, of course. "Well, as we all seem to know each other's names..Lupin, am I to assume that your renewed presence means you will be at Hogwarts again this year?"
Golden eyes twinkled triumphantly. "Yes, it seems that a great number of students convinced their parents that a werewolf teaching Defense Against Dark Arts was actually a rather clever idea. More surprising was the number of Slytherins among them." A questioning look was sent to the blond boy who had been wondering if he should get jealous over someone *else* having a chest full of Harry.
Draco, pink with the decency to blush, averted his eyes. It was a well- known fact that the young Malfoy ruled his house with the authority of a benevolent master. A combination of fear, respect, and helpless devotion derived from the boy's own charisma and confidence insured it. And, of course, with his better*cough*Gryffindor half, he'd smoothly led his minions,er, housemates right out from under Voldemort's nose without anyone the wiser.
But, really, that was a story for another chapter.
The overly affectionate Golden Boy in question smiled beautifically at his boyfriend before abandoning his almost uncle in favor of gifting the smug Slytherin with multiple sloppy kisses for the act. Snape manfully repressed the instinctive wince at his son and number one student acting like honeymooners and looked over to see Remus Lupin completely pole-axed.
Wisely keeping the maniacal cackling to his own head, Severus allowed himself a moment to bask in this turn of events. And the werewolf didn't even know why Harry was with *him* instead of those miserable excuses for blood relations he'd been with. "Maybe we should adjourn to lunch to discuss recent revelations?"
His son, finally content with the happy dazed look on his significant other's face, stepped away to adjust his sunglasses and nodded. "Sounds good. The Leaky Cauldron alright?"
"Perfect."
The mention of food was enough to jolt Lupin from disbelief to denial and the party left, new robes in hand and disguises straightened.
Of course, Snape did consider asking how the mutt had seen through said disguises but as their disguises were rather horrible and he'd almost managed to make it through the chapter without looking like a feeble minded idiot, he contented himself with trusting the wolf's nose. After all, he was presently sniffing the boys, obviously convinced this was all a nightmare or some cruel prank involving polyjuice and years of bent up revenge.
Ain't denial grand?
"You're dating a Slytherin."
"Yes."
"And Snape is your.."
"Father, that's right."
"Ah." There was a familiar thump as Remus hit the floor, out cold, missing the meal that the foursome had been enjoying. (Wait, that sounded kind of wrong.)
Draco, having used up his good deeds for the next decade or so, merely set his fork primely on the edge of his plate and used one neat boot to nudge the unconscious elder. "Deja-vu," He murmered before addressing the remaining conscious members of the party. "You think it's catching or something?"
Snape glared before attacking his meal with a vengeance and muttering between bites even as his son worked to wrestle the dead weight back into the chair and out from under the concerned waiter's feet. Well, at least the shopping was done.
It wasn't until later that night that the boys got to speak quietly about how everything was working in their plans. After all, there were unspoken questions to be addressed and plot holes to be paved. Draco sighed, resting his head on the brunette's chest, idylly playing with the discarded glasses from his disguise. "How long until Snape asks where my father is, do you think?"
Harry barely stirred from his own comfortable sprawl. "I don't know, it's like he barely believes *we're* here let alone the relatives that should be wondering where the hell we've gone."
"That's true, " the blond paused, and idea suddenly taking shape in his already sharp mind. "You know what Professor Snape needs?"
"After this mess? I don't know, therapy?" He didn't even need to open his eyes to feel the boy using him as a pillow roll his eyes.
"Yes, but what better *therapy* than the warm feelings between two people in love?"
Silence. "For one, when did you suddenly start quoting cheap romance novels and two, tell me you're not suggesting I set my father up with someone." Green eyes stared desperately up at the ceiling, unable to withstand the squicky images his own love's words had summoned upon the darkness of closed eyelids.
For some reason, the answering laughter was hollow, almost forced although the tone remained casual as Draco replied, "No, of course not."
Harry sighed this time, letting out the breath he didn't realize he'd been holding only to choke at the next sentence. "No, not just anyone. The *werewolf*!"
Shattered composure was quickly gathered up and glued back together clumsily. "Um, ah, that's vaguely disturbing, Draco."
"I'm well aware of that."
"But, " dawning awe lit up emerald green eyes, "it just might work!"
A smug, if adorably sleepy voice, drifted up to the boy who lived ear's. "Of course, it is *my* plan, after all."
TBC...
A/N: I am so unbelievably sorry this took so long! Things have been insane between school, work, and, congratulate me, I actually have a Significant Other of my own now! Of course, they're in Virginia for the next week and a half..*growls* But, alas, I apologize again for the lack of updating. Of course, if you want to review and gripe on me to hurry with the next chapter, hehehe...Oh, and, thanks for over ONE HUNDRED REVIEWS!!! *applause*
TANKU!
(Saavik) Aw, thank you! Spontaneous disruption of the computer lab peace for me?? (hippy flower) here you go, a lotta late but, hey, better late than never? (nagini: c r i m s o n) Yes! Support the Sevie/Remy future! (Pyro Bear) Thankies, sorry this chapter isn't as funny. (TanisaFyre) Yeah, I'm lazy too. Can you tell? (Apostrophe) Don't worry, I'll be back to tormenting Snape before you know it. (remmy) Sorry bout the wait, hope you like my Remus too! (jess) Aw shucks! (Human Eyed Owl) *giggles* And I thought I was the only one that thought I was funny (witchmaster) Poor Snape, yeah, expect him to um, 'blackout' again soon. (ryleeblack) sorry bout the wait? (Jewelclaw Lady of the Wind) Oh good, safety first! (kim) short, to the point, works for me. I updated! (RacingStripes) I'll update if you promise to work on A Bargin at Any Price! I *have* to know what happens! (Harmoni) No problem. (amy) My bad? (lusie) Merci!
Hannya
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters or settings and, with medication and counseling, I'm learning to live with that. Now shoo!
Warnings: And here I go running with the lack of serious. Slash? Bad jokes?
A/N: What? This chapter took forever? *fidgets nervously* Well, you see, there was this squirrel and a bomb and, um.*runs away quickly*.
Saaa, this chapter sucks..(
CHAPTER 6
It was funny, really. Snape had assumed that his time as Potion's Professor to years of clumsy talentless wizard spawn had been punishment enough for his past Deatheater transgressions.
He was, obviously, very very wrong.
"Tell me again why this is necessary?" The victim in question grumbled, acidity lost as his newly found son affixed a rather ridiculous fake mustache to his stiff upper lip.
Harry grinned, "Because we can't go to Diagon's Ally as us and we *need* our school supplies."
Oh yes, this whole humiliating procedure was so two sixth years could go pick up new books and quills. Dark eyes darted involuntarily to the blond currently donning a floppy hat and stylish tinted half-moon glasses. "And while I can't use magic outside of school, the two of you are simply hopeless at glamour charms. Hence the disguises."
Silently cursing himself and his charges, Snape had little choice but to sit there and suffer as his hair was tied back in a ponytail and his robes traded for a loud tie-dye version. The fruit of his loins was slightly better off, using oversize prescription sunglasses and a muggle baseball cap with an anti-Deatheater patch sewn on to hide his notable infamous features.
Oh yes, no one would recognize them. Mostly because no one would believe that Snape would be caught dead in such a get up. Ha! If only..
And so, now suitably different from their usual appearances, the abused older wizard reached for the floo powder, almost missing the girlish squeak of protest from his child. "What now?!"
"We were actually going to, uh, portkey there, " the boy savior flushed behind his shades and pointedly ignored the snickering Slytherin behind him.
"He hates floo powder, " Draco sneered, getting an elbow to the ribs for his trouble. "But I think *it* hates *him* more."
Snape frowned. Floo powder? Who in a freezing hell had Floo Powder issues?! "Then how on Earth did you end up at the mansion?" Harry suddenly found his shoes very interesting as he cautiously answering,
"Well, Floo powder.but the look on your face kind of made it worth it."
The new school year hadn't even begun and all ready, his frayed nerves were twitching. This did not bode well for the first years. Draco eyed the head of his house cautiously. "Maybe we should go now." His Gryffindor counterpart nodded quickly and reached for the aforementioned port key before his parent spontaneously combusted.
"This day just gets better and better, " Snape muttered to himself, shifting uncomfortably in one of the pink/gold chair things in the fitting room of Madam Malkin's. The two former teenage enemies were chatting away like old gossips while he merely sat and enjoyed his 'break' from carrying 'his share' of the book bags. Maybe Voldemort would call for him or something.. Even Cruciatus would be better than this!
".So then I said, 'or should I say 'Dad'' and BOOM he was on the floor, out like a light."
Okay, forget never having any more children. At this point he was seriously contemplating giving up on women altogether!
Karma, apparently bored with torturing every other poor schmuck on the planet, chose that moment to interrupt his musings as a stranger nearly knocked him out of his chair in the rush to escape what had to be rabid wolves at the very least.
The high-pitched squeals of adolescent schoolgirls pierced the already chaotic air as the interloper hurriedly locked the door behind him and barricaded it with the matching chair. Snape winced in sympathy. Rabid wolves would have been a kindness. No, the predators in this case were far far deadlier.
Rabid fangirls.
Hogwart's finest by the sound of it.
Long unused instinct kicked in and with the grace of a large and slightly slimy ballerina, the Potions Master had secured the door with one very uncomfortable pink chair jammed under the doorknob. The next few minutes were, thankfully, a blur. Fangirls, while frighteningly obsessive, were unwilling to inflict actual property damage despite the tastiness of their prey and retreated after a few half-hearted thumps and muttered spells. . That done, the disguised gang turned to stare disbelievingly at the newcomer, exclamations flying like bullets.
"Moony!"
"Professor?!"
"LUPIN!"
Already harassed, the werewolf in question merely snapped back, or, rather, *would* have snapped back had he not found himself with a chest full of Potter. "Harry!"
Snape Sr. and Malfoy Jr. exchanged a look, quickly, that included a sneer followed immediately by wary acceptance of the returning Marauder...for Harry, of course. "Well, as we all seem to know each other's names..Lupin, am I to assume that your renewed presence means you will be at Hogwarts again this year?"
Golden eyes twinkled triumphantly. "Yes, it seems that a great number of students convinced their parents that a werewolf teaching Defense Against Dark Arts was actually a rather clever idea. More surprising was the number of Slytherins among them." A questioning look was sent to the blond boy who had been wondering if he should get jealous over someone *else* having a chest full of Harry.
Draco, pink with the decency to blush, averted his eyes. It was a well- known fact that the young Malfoy ruled his house with the authority of a benevolent master. A combination of fear, respect, and helpless devotion derived from the boy's own charisma and confidence insured it. And, of course, with his better*cough*Gryffindor half, he'd smoothly led his minions,er, housemates right out from under Voldemort's nose without anyone the wiser.
But, really, that was a story for another chapter.
The overly affectionate Golden Boy in question smiled beautifically at his boyfriend before abandoning his almost uncle in favor of gifting the smug Slytherin with multiple sloppy kisses for the act. Snape manfully repressed the instinctive wince at his son and number one student acting like honeymooners and looked over to see Remus Lupin completely pole-axed.
Wisely keeping the maniacal cackling to his own head, Severus allowed himself a moment to bask in this turn of events. And the werewolf didn't even know why Harry was with *him* instead of those miserable excuses for blood relations he'd been with. "Maybe we should adjourn to lunch to discuss recent revelations?"
His son, finally content with the happy dazed look on his significant other's face, stepped away to adjust his sunglasses and nodded. "Sounds good. The Leaky Cauldron alright?"
"Perfect."
The mention of food was enough to jolt Lupin from disbelief to denial and the party left, new robes in hand and disguises straightened.
Of course, Snape did consider asking how the mutt had seen through said disguises but as their disguises were rather horrible and he'd almost managed to make it through the chapter without looking like a feeble minded idiot, he contented himself with trusting the wolf's nose. After all, he was presently sniffing the boys, obviously convinced this was all a nightmare or some cruel prank involving polyjuice and years of bent up revenge.
Ain't denial grand?
"You're dating a Slytherin."
"Yes."
"And Snape is your.."
"Father, that's right."
"Ah." There was a familiar thump as Remus hit the floor, out cold, missing the meal that the foursome had been enjoying. (Wait, that sounded kind of wrong.)
Draco, having used up his good deeds for the next decade or so, merely set his fork primely on the edge of his plate and used one neat boot to nudge the unconscious elder. "Deja-vu," He murmered before addressing the remaining conscious members of the party. "You think it's catching or something?"
Snape glared before attacking his meal with a vengeance and muttering between bites even as his son worked to wrestle the dead weight back into the chair and out from under the concerned waiter's feet. Well, at least the shopping was done.
It wasn't until later that night that the boys got to speak quietly about how everything was working in their plans. After all, there were unspoken questions to be addressed and plot holes to be paved. Draco sighed, resting his head on the brunette's chest, idylly playing with the discarded glasses from his disguise. "How long until Snape asks where my father is, do you think?"
Harry barely stirred from his own comfortable sprawl. "I don't know, it's like he barely believes *we're* here let alone the relatives that should be wondering where the hell we've gone."
"That's true, " the blond paused, and idea suddenly taking shape in his already sharp mind. "You know what Professor Snape needs?"
"After this mess? I don't know, therapy?" He didn't even need to open his eyes to feel the boy using him as a pillow roll his eyes.
"Yes, but what better *therapy* than the warm feelings between two people in love?"
Silence. "For one, when did you suddenly start quoting cheap romance novels and two, tell me you're not suggesting I set my father up with someone." Green eyes stared desperately up at the ceiling, unable to withstand the squicky images his own love's words had summoned upon the darkness of closed eyelids.
For some reason, the answering laughter was hollow, almost forced although the tone remained casual as Draco replied, "No, of course not."
Harry sighed this time, letting out the breath he didn't realize he'd been holding only to choke at the next sentence. "No, not just anyone. The *werewolf*!"
Shattered composure was quickly gathered up and glued back together clumsily. "Um, ah, that's vaguely disturbing, Draco."
"I'm well aware of that."
"But, " dawning awe lit up emerald green eyes, "it just might work!"
A smug, if adorably sleepy voice, drifted up to the boy who lived ear's. "Of course, it is *my* plan, after all."
TBC...
A/N: I am so unbelievably sorry this took so long! Things have been insane between school, work, and, congratulate me, I actually have a Significant Other of my own now! Of course, they're in Virginia for the next week and a half..*growls* But, alas, I apologize again for the lack of updating. Of course, if you want to review and gripe on me to hurry with the next chapter, hehehe...Oh, and, thanks for over ONE HUNDRED REVIEWS!!! *applause*
TANKU!
(Saavik) Aw, thank you! Spontaneous disruption of the computer lab peace for me?? (hippy flower) here you go, a lotta late but, hey, better late than never? (nagini: c r i m s o n) Yes! Support the Sevie/Remy future! (Pyro Bear) Thankies, sorry this chapter isn't as funny. (TanisaFyre) Yeah, I'm lazy too. Can you tell? (Apostrophe) Don't worry, I'll be back to tormenting Snape before you know it. (remmy) Sorry bout the wait, hope you like my Remus too! (jess) Aw shucks! (Human Eyed Owl) *giggles* And I thought I was the only one that thought I was funny (witchmaster) Poor Snape, yeah, expect him to um, 'blackout' again soon. (ryleeblack) sorry bout the wait? (Jewelclaw Lady of the Wind) Oh good, safety first! (kim) short, to the point, works for me. I updated! (RacingStripes) I'll update if you promise to work on A Bargin at Any Price! I *have* to know what happens! (Harmoni) No problem. (amy) My bad? (lusie) Merci!