Yay! Now that my mock SATs are finished, I'll be writing like a . . . .um. . . . fast writer. Anyway, we're on to chapter 7 now, and thank-you for reviewing!
Makaveli: Thanks for reviewing my last 2 chappies, much appreciated!
Lady Quiao: Lucky you, this chapter is all about Jin and Xiayu, but will they end up together? Who knows. Me! That's who! Mwah ha ha ha ha!!!
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An Announcement
One year later, Jin and Xiayu sit lazily in front of a modest hut in the famous jungle desert forest swamp waste-lands of Burkina Faso surrounded by emus.
Xiayu: Oh Jin, I could never have dreamt that a freak window-leaping accident could lead to me becoming the happiest emu-farmer in the whole of the jungle desert forest swamp waste-lands of Burkina Faso.
Jin: I know what you mean -- those voices in my head stopped shouting abuse at me months ago and now they sing me easy-listening music.
Just at that moment, a huge Jeep comes crashing through the underbrush.
Heihachi leaps off the vehicle and stomps over to Jin and Xiayu, squishing several Emus along the way.
Heihachi: Jin! Xiayu! Where have you been?! I've been looking everywhere for you!
Jin: Really?
Heihachi: No, I was actually looking for the remote, but since I found you maybe you'd like to know about the King of Fudge Fist Tournament I'm organising.
Xiayu: King of Fudge Fist? Wasn't it the King of Iron Fist?
Heihachi: Yeah, but the Jacks, Yoshimitsu and Tetsujin considered it a racial slur so we had to change it.
Jin: Well, it's nice of you to tell us, but Bitchums-Snugglebuns [which had become his pet-name for Xiayu since the un-wedding] and I,
He puts his arm around her Disney style.
we're not interested in glory, theme-parks or money anymore, we've become Peace Troopers, see, we got badges.
They show Heihachi their badges.
We even became vegetarians.
Heihachi: But you own an emu farm.
Xiayu: Yeah, and?
Heihachi: You farm emus.
Jin: Well done! And dogs go meow.
Heihachi: Riiiiiiiiiiiiight. But anyway, these emus get sent to a slaughter house, killed and eaten.
Jin: They told us they were being taken to a wildlife reserve!
Xiayu and Jin burst into tears.
Xiayu: Speeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeckles!
Jin: We have nothing left to live for here! come on, Bitchums-Snugglebuns, let's go!
They climb into the Jeep with Heihachi, and chug back to, err, wherever it is the Tekken characters congregate.
* * *
Jin, Heihachi, Xiayu and Ogre (who came along because he also wanted to find the remote) are sitting in the Jeep.
Xiayu: Jin.
Jin: Yeeeeeeees, Bitchums-Snugglebuns.
Xiayu: I'M PREGNANT!!
Jin: What?!
Xiayu: Je suis enciente! Ich bin schwanger! Soy Embarazdo! ego sum--
Ogre: Okay, okay, I think he understands.
Jin: No I don't.
Xiayu: Urgh!
* * *
Five hours later, Jin is being pinned down by Ogre while Heihachi holds his eyes open and Xiayu creatively explains a few thing to him with the aid of hand-puppets. [And in case you were thinking it, there is NOTHING dirty going on here!!!]
Xiayu: . . . and then the egg queen and the sperm fairy join forces to create a cute little baby.
Jin: No more! No more! I understand!
* * *
Back in the Jeep, they finally arrive back at 'Tekken Island' shall we say?
Jin: I'm gunna be a daddy!
Xiayu: Jin, it's not yours.
Jin: Hey, I bought this shirt fair and square.
Xiayu: No, Jin, the baby, it's not yours.
TO BE CONTINUED. . .
[Will Jin ever forgive Xiayu? Who's baby is it? Does this even make sense?? Find out in the next puke-curdling chapter of Jin's Random and Severely Disturbed Super-Dooper Adventure!]
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You already know what I'm gunna say so review already!
