I'm ba-aaaaack! No, don't run away in terror for I bring another chapter! I decided we've seen enough of Jin for now, so here it is: the first chapter of this entire fic which features absolutely NO Jin! Now, I know many of you are now beating your key-boards yelling 'Why? WHY??!!' But fear not, for he'll be back soon, pumped and ready for action!
Serini the WaveTrapmaster: Riiiiiiiiiiiight. . . I didn't understand a word of that, but thanks anyhow! And I had no idea who rurioni kenshin was but I did a little research with the use of Google image search and found rurouni kenshin. . . who appears to be a bloke with a X scar. . . whatever! ^_~X -- hee hee, note the X scar
Makaveli: Awwww, you're so nice to me! I'm glad to hear your mum liked it! And I have granted your request with another chappie!
Chibi-Sugababy: Thanks a lot, I also liebe Ugly Baby. It's nice to be getting new reviewers this far into the story!
Lady Qiao: Who knows if Jin and Xiayu will get back together. . . . . . . you'll just have to wait to find out. . . . . . . . . . (I just love annoying my readers).
Disclaimer: Don't own it, never have, never will, but want to!
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Yo' Mama
In the sparring room of the Mishima castle, all of the characters are gathered and listening to / throwing fruit at Heihachi.
Heihachi: My friends!--
Random Crowd Member: HA!
Heihachi: Fine!
My casual acquaintances! Welcome to The King Of Fudge Fist Tournament . . .
He thinks (ee-gad!) for a few seconds, having made a mistake, then continues.
. . . first annual!
Random Crowd Member: Yoda is among us!
Heihachi: Anyway, I have gathered you, the finest warriors in the world, here today so that you can beat each other into bleeding pulps for sport!
A pause.
Crickets chirp, Law coughs, somewhere in the distance a wolf howls and one of Tiger's spare afros rolls across the hall.
(to himself) I knew I shouldn't have hired Jin to write my speech for me.
(to the crowd) The blood-ba-- tournament will commence with Ganryu--
Random Crowd Member: He's your boyfrie--
Before they have a chance to finish, Heihachi whips out a gun and shoots them dead.
Heihachi: Ganryu versus Michelle!
A slip of paper is passed forward to Heihachi. He reads it.
Okay, scratch that. Due to legal reasons, the first match is being revised.
A tournament official comes on stage and whispers something in his ear.
Instead it will be Ganryu versus Xiayu!
Random Crowd Member: Haha! careful not to put them on the same bench pre-fright -- he might sit on her!
Heihachi: Why won't you die!!??
He commences to pump bullets into the crowd member, after which he leaps into the crowd and begins pummelling them.
Eddy: Errr, Heihachi? You just killed your mother.
A pause.
Heihachi: I know.
* * *
Xiayu and Ganryu are poised and ready to begin their fight in the castle's sparring area.
Irritating Narrator: Fight!
Ganryu: Hey, Little Baby! Where's your mama?
Xiayu: She's right over there.
She points to a sweet-looking Chinese woman who waves.
Ganryu is a little fazed.
Ganryu: Yeah, well. . . yo' mama's so old. . . . erm. . . she's so old that. . . let's see here, was it? Maybe?
Xiayu is evidently growing impatient.
Ganryu: Okay. I've got it: Yo' mama is so old that she makes Jesus look old. . . . . wait, was that it? No, maybe Moses, or was it something about an ark?
Xiayu let's out a primal cry [I know what you're thinking (because I can read minds, mwah ha ha ha!), you're thinking, 'What the Hell is a primal cry, and how is it any different from a normal cry??' well, there is no difference, but it just sounds better] Anyway, she lets out a PRIMAL cry and punches Ganryu it the nose.
Crowd: Yay!
After he has recovered, Ganryu grabs Xiayu by the bunchies, lifts her off the floor, spins he around and throws her across the room. [Don'tcha wish the real Tekken fights were this exciting?]
Ganryu: I've remembered it!! Yo' mama is so old, she makes Jesus look young!
Crowd: Ooooooooooo
Xiayu: Watcha talkin' bout my mama?? Well, yo' mama is so FAT, when I wanna pass her on da highway, I have to leave da road!
Crowd: Oooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Ganryu: Don't talk about my mama you little munchkin!
He makes a run at her and they commence to have a rather grisly bitch fight.
Crowd: Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. . .
TO BE CONTINUED. . .
[What the Hell is going on? What's with the crappy 'yo' mamam' jokes? Since when did any of the fighters have parents? None of these questions, but probably some different ones, will be answered in the next chapter of Jin's Random And Severely Disturbed Super-Dooper Adventure!!]