Aaauuughh! the gaps between updates are growing ever bigger! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry! But I've been so busy now that I'm back at school. And I fear that with my oncoming SATs, that it's gunna be even harder for me to update. Soooooooooooooo I propose another vote, either I can carry on updating the way I am (ie. scrambling to the keyboard to type it up every few weeks) or I can slice the chapters in half and in theory that should mean I'll be updating twice as often (in theory communism works). So it's up to YOU to decide, so when you review write 'halve' at the end if you think I should chop 'em, or alternatively write 'leave them be, oh Evil Chopper Of Chapters!'

Makaveli: Danke! I love this story too, sorry that I couldn't quite fulfil that 'update soon' request! ^ ~

Kawaii Ed: Thanks. I think I remembered to review one of your fics, let me check . . . yes! I did, wow, I'm quite impressed with myself! I usually never remember stuff! but where's that update I demanded, eh??

ChibiShiva: Hee hee. Get up! You're wearing a hole in the carpet from all that rolling around! But thank-you!

Lady Qiao: Your wish is my command, oh Great Chap Reviewer!

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The Return of Super Jin!

Picking up where we left off, Xiayu and Ganryu are still slapping away.

Two Jerry Springer oompa-lumpas (the security people were replaced by oompa-Lumpas because they're cuter) attempt to break up the fight. One, however, is sucked into Ganryu's rolls of flab, and the other cowars in the corner.

Crowd: Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. . .

Kazuya enters.

Crowd: Kazuya, Kazuya, Kazuya. . .

Kazuya: Shut the Hell up! And you two, what are ya, five?!

Ganryu: I thought the host was supposed to be understanding and compassionate.

Kazuya: Yeah, well I'm demanding and passionate. . . . . when it comes to rage.

A laughter sign above the arena blinks and the audience begin laughing hysterically, though most of them are already crying hysterically anyway.

Once Xiayu and Ganryu have sat down Kazuya begins.

Welcome to Kazuya Mishima, and today's--

An oompa-lumpa walks into the arena and says something to Kazuya.

Since that title doesn't fit legibly on to a TV screen, it is being shortened to (through his teeth) 'Kazzy Mishma'.

Applause sigh blinks and (guess what!) the audience applauds.

Anyway, in today's fight we have (reading from cue card) 'My fighting opponent is fat. . . . . he's also ugly, smelly, wears a nappy, never bathes, is annoying, dumb, has no friends-- Xiayu!

He turns to see Xiayu trying to hide a pen behind her back.

Man, this goes on for pages.

Anyway, let's get start with you, Ganryu. When did you first meet Xiayu?

Ganryu: When I peeled her off my shoe at the . . . second, I think, King of Iron Fist Tournament, I had stepped on her.

Kazuya: (bored) Oh. what a riveting life you do lead. (to audience) This is boring, go home, Everyone.

Just as the audience is getting up to leave, a crash is heard from above and Jin leaps through the roof (not the window this time) in the form of. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . SUPER JIN!!!!! (with a bag over his head).

The audience applauds and wolf whistles.

Xiayu: Jin, what are you--

After him leaps Super-Sidekick Ugly Baby!!!

The audience applauds even more, and anyone who wolf-whistles is arrested on charges of being a paedophile.

Xiayu: Where have you been, Young Man??

Jin: Well first I was weeping in my room, then--

Xiayu: Not you! The baby!

Ugly Baby: Ummmmm, I was just, ummmmm. . .

Jin: He's been with me the whole time, I swear it, Officer!

Xiayu: And Jin, what's with the bag on your head?

Jin: Well, it's a piece of brown paper which is folded into a cube shape with one open side, and it's used to hold various items, food, equipment, heads--

Xiayu: No, Baka! Why are you wearing it?!!?

Jin: Because I couldn't find a box.

Kazuya: What's with the frickin bag, Mo-ron!?

Jin: Well, that's what Poo-Faced Xiayu Grrl should have been asking.

Xiayu: Rrrrrrrrrr!!

Jin: Well, Poo-Faced Xiayu Grrl, there's something you should know, I. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Xiayu!!!

Xiayu is drawing a moustache and glasses on the sleeping Ganryu in permanent ink.

Xiayu: (obviously not listening) Yeah, yeah, I'm listening. . .

She continues drawing.

Ganryu inhales the pen.

Jin: Xiayuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!

Xiayu: Yeah!

Jin: I. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . am ugly!

He tries to rip the bag off but it gets caught.

Ow, ow, ow.

Ugly Baby: What? Where?

Jin: On my ear, it's. . . . . . . . . . . . . . ow, ow.

They finally tear it off to reveal a big, ugly, spotty mass of original Jin.

Xiayu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Kazuya: Now this is a show!

TO BE CONTINUED. . .

[How dramatic!! How will Jin cope with being ugly? Why on earth would he want to be ugly anyway? Are you implying that there's something wrong with ugly people???!!! Find out next chapter!]

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Yay! I'm enjoying this story myself, but you've got to do your bit and review! I went to the trouble of writing it after all, you lazy, good for nothings! Just kidding, I love you all! Remember to vote, and I'm very very very sorry if it takes a while for me to update, I have a good reason, ummmmmm, my dog ate it!