G: Sorry we left you peeps hangin' so here's part 2 of PAINTBALL GUNS!
K: Once again, DO NOT OWN YGO!
______________________________________________________________________________
Yami Discovers...PAINTBALL GUNS!!!
(Part 2: ATTACK OF THE FUZZY PINK THINGS!!!)
Yami, Bakura, Malik, & Jounouchi were crouching their way through Anzu's house searching for her while searching for the pictures of Mai slaughtering cows.
Malik: RA! I'M GETTING BLINDED HERE! THERE'S TOO MANY FUZZY, PINK THINGS! YEECH!
Yami: Just shut up and take it like a man Malik!
Malik: I AM taking it like a man!
Bakura: Well you suck cock at it!
Yami: Shh! Listen.
A deep rumbling sound emanated within the depths of the kitchen. Jou took a quick peek in the door and quickly slammed it shut.
Bakura: What did you see?
Jou: *Ghostly look on his face* Anybody got a flamethrower?
Yami: Nope.
Jou: Grenades?
Malik: Nope.
The door burst open without warning, and out swarmed a gigantic stream of fuzzy, pink, hairballs. The group frantically took refuge behind a couch.
Bakura: What're we gonna do!? In a matter of minutes we're gonna be overrun by the pink, fuzzy things!
Yami: Wait, I think I've got something! *Pulls out a grenade*
Malik: Is that what I think it is?
Yami: It's a Napalm!
Jou: Well what're you waiting for!? Throw it! Throw it!
Yami: Here goes. FIRE IN THE HOLE!
Yami hurled the Napalm over the couch, into the swarm of fuzzy things. A deep boom emanated, as well as cries of millions of fuzzy things dying. When the carnage subsided the room was covered in...
Jou: WHIPPED CREAM?! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING YAMI?!
Yami: It sounded like a good idea. Besides, at least we got rid of the pink, fuzzy, hairballs.
Bakura: Well yeah, but why whipped cream?!
Yami: Let's just go on shall we?
Bakura: Yami's still hooked on whipped cream!
Yami: I am seriously going to smack you down fool!
Bakura: Yeah? Then do it!
Yami: You're still sore from the bruises baka. Don't push it. *adds the Death-glare*
Bakura: Okei, shutting up.
They went up a stairwell that was decorated with all sorts of strange arcane symbols.
They went up farther and farther up until they hit a sign near a door that said:
"WARNING! THIS AREA PROTECTED BY WATCH-POODLES! PROCEED @ YOUR OWN RISK!~Anzu"
Malik: I ain't scared of some scrawny, flea-bitten, mutts! I'm going in!
Bakura: No Malik! You don't even know how big they are!
Malik: Screw you! I'm goin' in!
Jou: Have it your way. *lets Malik pass*
Malik charged in with paintball guns blazing, while the door shut on him. The others simply waited while girlish screaming and gunfire erupted from the room. Seconds later, Malik practically flew out the door while Yami, Bakura, and Jou, slammed the door on the nuzzle of a giant, fuzzy, pink, poodle. Malik was curled in a fetal position sucking his thumb.
Malik: Oh Ra, That..was...fucking...scary.
Yami: What did you see in there?
Malik: I saw a big-ass, three-headed, poodle! It was guarding a door with a bunch of Petit Angels around it!
Bakura: Told you not to go in, but did you listen? Nooooooooooo, You didn't!
Malik: Oh shut up, before I shoot your bruises again!
Bakura: Shutting up.
Yami: I'll go in there!
Jou: No! Don't make the same mistake Malik-baka made!
Yami: Don't worry Jou, as long as I have whipped cream, I'm invincible! *goes inside*
INSIDE:
Yami was armed with a can of whipped cream inside the shocking pink room.
The poodle was waiting in front of the door. Tall, triple-headed, pink, & u-g-l-y-you-aint'-got-no-alibi, hideous. He opened the can and sprayed some into his mouth. Suddenly, he began to tremor & shake, soon he turned into...THE INCREDIBLE HULK?!
Yami: Yami-Hulk smash fuzzy, ugly, pink doggie! (AN: Think of the Hulk w/ Yami's hairdo!!! XD!!!)
After half an hour, Yami-Hulk kicked the everlasting piss out of the poodle by swinging it in a circle, and smashing them over the head with a gigantic...CAKE PAN!?
Y. Hulk: Me turn doggie into cake-batter! Me bake & take back to Aibou!
After the poodle was turned into cake batter & baked, Yami turned back into his normal self and stuffed the cake into one of his pockets.
Yami: Just great. That's the 3rd shirt that I've ripped out of. Oh well, I guess it's time for another trip to the Banana Republic.
The others burst in with guns drawn, and were surprised that Yami was still standing in the middle of the room. (Half-naked of course)
Jou: By Ra! You're still alive!? But how?!
Yami: Like I said, WHIPPED CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!! (starts pounding his chest like King-Kong)
Malik: *sweatdrop* Uh...yeah.--'
Then, just as they were starting to relax, the room shook and split open. Anzu flew in, as a pink, mutant wasp. (think of that wasp lady from Onimusha, and splice Anzu's face into it. Paint it pink too)
Anzu: Were you looking for the pictures? Well too bad! You'll never get them! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Bakura: And what makes you think you can stop us?
Anzu: CUZ' NOW I'M A GIANT, PINK, WASP! And the only way you bakas will ever escape, is to leave Yami with me!
Yami: So? That doesn't mean we can't stop a flying freak-show like you. AND WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'M GONNA STAY IN THIS PINK, FUZZY, HELL HOLE YOU CALL A HOUSE?! WITH YOU?!
Anzu: Why not? I like you! (AN: Oh God, That reminded me of Bud Hawley. Not cool.)
Yami: Yeah? Well the majority of peeps in this world, me included, simply hate you, mainly cuz we're borderline sick of your non-stop bitching about friendship!
Anzu-wasp: THAT'S IT! YOU'LL ALL PAY! COME MY CHILDREN! DEVOUR THEM ALL!!!
Then giant, flying, ants flew in and surrounded the squad of paintballers.
Bakura: Uh, Yami? Having some whipped cream wouldn't be a bad idea right now!
Yami: Crap! I ran out of whipped cream! And I got a vicious headache!
Jou: Well now what the fuck do we do?!
Malik: *Imitating southern accent* I say, speak softly and carry a big-ass flamethrower!
*Whips out flamethrower*
Jou: The hell? How come you didn't tell me you had a flamethrower earlier?!
Malik: Cuz' the authors needed some more "surprise" gags.
Bakura: Hey! That's MY flamethrower you fucker! Give it back!
Malik: Go suck a monkey! *torches Bakura*
Bakura: Gyahhh! THAT'S IT! FIRST YOU BRUISE ME, NOW YOU TORCH ME WITH MY OWN FLAMETHROWER! PREPARE TO DIE MALIK!!!
Black flames began to engulf the tomb robber for a few seconds until he transformed into...
Bakura: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOW I AM OROCCHI BAKURA! SUFFER THE FLAMES OF DARKNESS! *throws a sick-ass fireball @ Malik*
Malik evaded and the fireball hit a group of giant ants instead turning them all into flaming insectoid sausage links. This continued on for five more minutes while Bakura let out a continuous string of curses and fireballs at Malik.
MEANWHILE...(AN: LET THE TESTICULAR INJURIES BEGIN!!!XDXDXD)
Seto woke up in the middle of the lawn near the house covered in red paint. So far, this was the second time he got hit by the mounted paintball cannon from Jounouchi's car, the first time being used as a human "battering ram", the second time being knocked down by Yuugi when Seto tried to get horny on him. Now he was tethered to the lawn and stripped butt-nekkid with his legs spread wide open. The only thing he wore was a cup protector covering the Kaiba family's "jewels."
Seto: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?! MOKUBA?! WHERE ARE YOU?! DAMMIT MOKUBA LEMME OUTTA HERE!!!!
Mokuba appeared holding a paintball gun at Seto's balls.
Seto: What the hell do you plan to do with that gun?!
Mokuba: *answers with several shots to the groin.*
Seto: Gyahh! You sadistic little brat! What did I do to deserve this!
Mokuba: Nothing! Cuz Jounouchi paid me to make a DVD of you getting hit in the crotch repeatedly! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Seto: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Back Inside...
The whole place erupted in dark flames as the fight continued between the Anzu and the Paintballers. How will this fight end? Will Seto's pubic bones ever heal? And will Bakura ever get payback on Malik for torching him with his own flamethrower? Find out on chapter 3: The epic showdown!
G: You know something? That should've been Anzu tied out there on the lawn instead of Seto.
T: Then why did you have Anzu turn into a mutant wasp anyway? You could've had Orocchi Bakura using one of his sick-ass fireballs on Anzu instead!
K: Know something else? This should've been rated R instead of PG-13, because of the excessive use of the F-word. That and excessive groin injury.
G: Well, it's too late to change the rating now. Sides, the last chappie's gonna be really short and have more Anzu-bashing. I swear!
T: Well friends, It's time to depart. Till next chappie, R+R!
K: Once again, DO NOT OWN YGO!
______________________________________________________________________________
Yami Discovers...PAINTBALL GUNS!!!
(Part 2: ATTACK OF THE FUZZY PINK THINGS!!!)
Yami, Bakura, Malik, & Jounouchi were crouching their way through Anzu's house searching for her while searching for the pictures of Mai slaughtering cows.
Malik: RA! I'M GETTING BLINDED HERE! THERE'S TOO MANY FUZZY, PINK THINGS! YEECH!
Yami: Just shut up and take it like a man Malik!
Malik: I AM taking it like a man!
Bakura: Well you suck cock at it!
Yami: Shh! Listen.
A deep rumbling sound emanated within the depths of the kitchen. Jou took a quick peek in the door and quickly slammed it shut.
Bakura: What did you see?
Jou: *Ghostly look on his face* Anybody got a flamethrower?
Yami: Nope.
Jou: Grenades?
Malik: Nope.
The door burst open without warning, and out swarmed a gigantic stream of fuzzy, pink, hairballs. The group frantically took refuge behind a couch.
Bakura: What're we gonna do!? In a matter of minutes we're gonna be overrun by the pink, fuzzy things!
Yami: Wait, I think I've got something! *Pulls out a grenade*
Malik: Is that what I think it is?
Yami: It's a Napalm!
Jou: Well what're you waiting for!? Throw it! Throw it!
Yami: Here goes. FIRE IN THE HOLE!
Yami hurled the Napalm over the couch, into the swarm of fuzzy things. A deep boom emanated, as well as cries of millions of fuzzy things dying. When the carnage subsided the room was covered in...
Jou: WHIPPED CREAM?! WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING YAMI?!
Yami: It sounded like a good idea. Besides, at least we got rid of the pink, fuzzy, hairballs.
Bakura: Well yeah, but why whipped cream?!
Yami: Let's just go on shall we?
Bakura: Yami's still hooked on whipped cream!
Yami: I am seriously going to smack you down fool!
Bakura: Yeah? Then do it!
Yami: You're still sore from the bruises baka. Don't push it. *adds the Death-glare*
Bakura: Okei, shutting up.
They went up a stairwell that was decorated with all sorts of strange arcane symbols.
They went up farther and farther up until they hit a sign near a door that said:
"WARNING! THIS AREA PROTECTED BY WATCH-POODLES! PROCEED @ YOUR OWN RISK!~Anzu"
Malik: I ain't scared of some scrawny, flea-bitten, mutts! I'm going in!
Bakura: No Malik! You don't even know how big they are!
Malik: Screw you! I'm goin' in!
Jou: Have it your way. *lets Malik pass*
Malik charged in with paintball guns blazing, while the door shut on him. The others simply waited while girlish screaming and gunfire erupted from the room. Seconds later, Malik practically flew out the door while Yami, Bakura, and Jou, slammed the door on the nuzzle of a giant, fuzzy, pink, poodle. Malik was curled in a fetal position sucking his thumb.
Malik: Oh Ra, That..was...fucking...scary.
Yami: What did you see in there?
Malik: I saw a big-ass, three-headed, poodle! It was guarding a door with a bunch of Petit Angels around it!
Bakura: Told you not to go in, but did you listen? Nooooooooooo, You didn't!
Malik: Oh shut up, before I shoot your bruises again!
Bakura: Shutting up.
Yami: I'll go in there!
Jou: No! Don't make the same mistake Malik-baka made!
Yami: Don't worry Jou, as long as I have whipped cream, I'm invincible! *goes inside*
INSIDE:
Yami was armed with a can of whipped cream inside the shocking pink room.
The poodle was waiting in front of the door. Tall, triple-headed, pink, & u-g-l-y-you-aint'-got-no-alibi, hideous. He opened the can and sprayed some into his mouth. Suddenly, he began to tremor & shake, soon he turned into...THE INCREDIBLE HULK?!
Yami: Yami-Hulk smash fuzzy, ugly, pink doggie! (AN: Think of the Hulk w/ Yami's hairdo!!! XD!!!)
After half an hour, Yami-Hulk kicked the everlasting piss out of the poodle by swinging it in a circle, and smashing them over the head with a gigantic...CAKE PAN!?
Y. Hulk: Me turn doggie into cake-batter! Me bake & take back to Aibou!
After the poodle was turned into cake batter & baked, Yami turned back into his normal self and stuffed the cake into one of his pockets.
Yami: Just great. That's the 3rd shirt that I've ripped out of. Oh well, I guess it's time for another trip to the Banana Republic.
The others burst in with guns drawn, and were surprised that Yami was still standing in the middle of the room. (Half-naked of course)
Jou: By Ra! You're still alive!? But how?!
Yami: Like I said, WHIPPED CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!! (starts pounding his chest like King-Kong)
Malik: *sweatdrop* Uh...yeah.--'
Then, just as they were starting to relax, the room shook and split open. Anzu flew in, as a pink, mutant wasp. (think of that wasp lady from Onimusha, and splice Anzu's face into it. Paint it pink too)
Anzu: Were you looking for the pictures? Well too bad! You'll never get them! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Bakura: And what makes you think you can stop us?
Anzu: CUZ' NOW I'M A GIANT, PINK, WASP! And the only way you bakas will ever escape, is to leave Yami with me!
Yami: So? That doesn't mean we can't stop a flying freak-show like you. AND WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'M GONNA STAY IN THIS PINK, FUZZY, HELL HOLE YOU CALL A HOUSE?! WITH YOU?!
Anzu: Why not? I like you! (AN: Oh God, That reminded me of Bud Hawley. Not cool.)
Yami: Yeah? Well the majority of peeps in this world, me included, simply hate you, mainly cuz we're borderline sick of your non-stop bitching about friendship!
Anzu-wasp: THAT'S IT! YOU'LL ALL PAY! COME MY CHILDREN! DEVOUR THEM ALL!!!
Then giant, flying, ants flew in and surrounded the squad of paintballers.
Bakura: Uh, Yami? Having some whipped cream wouldn't be a bad idea right now!
Yami: Crap! I ran out of whipped cream! And I got a vicious headache!
Jou: Well now what the fuck do we do?!
Malik: *Imitating southern accent* I say, speak softly and carry a big-ass flamethrower!
*Whips out flamethrower*
Jou: The hell? How come you didn't tell me you had a flamethrower earlier?!
Malik: Cuz' the authors needed some more "surprise" gags.
Bakura: Hey! That's MY flamethrower you fucker! Give it back!
Malik: Go suck a monkey! *torches Bakura*
Bakura: Gyahhh! THAT'S IT! FIRST YOU BRUISE ME, NOW YOU TORCH ME WITH MY OWN FLAMETHROWER! PREPARE TO DIE MALIK!!!
Black flames began to engulf the tomb robber for a few seconds until he transformed into...
Bakura: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! NOW I AM OROCCHI BAKURA! SUFFER THE FLAMES OF DARKNESS! *throws a sick-ass fireball @ Malik*
Malik evaded and the fireball hit a group of giant ants instead turning them all into flaming insectoid sausage links. This continued on for five more minutes while Bakura let out a continuous string of curses and fireballs at Malik.
MEANWHILE...(AN: LET THE TESTICULAR INJURIES BEGIN!!!XDXDXD)
Seto woke up in the middle of the lawn near the house covered in red paint. So far, this was the second time he got hit by the mounted paintball cannon from Jounouchi's car, the first time being used as a human "battering ram", the second time being knocked down by Yuugi when Seto tried to get horny on him. Now he was tethered to the lawn and stripped butt-nekkid with his legs spread wide open. The only thing he wore was a cup protector covering the Kaiba family's "jewels."
Seto: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?! MOKUBA?! WHERE ARE YOU?! DAMMIT MOKUBA LEMME OUTTA HERE!!!!
Mokuba appeared holding a paintball gun at Seto's balls.
Seto: What the hell do you plan to do with that gun?!
Mokuba: *answers with several shots to the groin.*
Seto: Gyahh! You sadistic little brat! What did I do to deserve this!
Mokuba: Nothing! Cuz Jounouchi paid me to make a DVD of you getting hit in the crotch repeatedly! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Seto: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Back Inside...
The whole place erupted in dark flames as the fight continued between the Anzu and the Paintballers. How will this fight end? Will Seto's pubic bones ever heal? And will Bakura ever get payback on Malik for torching him with his own flamethrower? Find out on chapter 3: The epic showdown!
G: You know something? That should've been Anzu tied out there on the lawn instead of Seto.
T: Then why did you have Anzu turn into a mutant wasp anyway? You could've had Orocchi Bakura using one of his sick-ass fireballs on Anzu instead!
K: Know something else? This should've been rated R instead of PG-13, because of the excessive use of the F-word. That and excessive groin injury.
G: Well, it's too late to change the rating now. Sides, the last chappie's gonna be really short and have more Anzu-bashing. I swear!
T: Well friends, It's time to depart. Till next chappie, R+R!