Crash Bandicoot meets Nazza
N.B. Crash Bandicoot and all related Crash stuff belongs to Naughty Dog and Sony/
Nazza is my own creation (obviously)/
"Luigi" guest stars in this fic/
This level is exactly the same as The Great Gate/
Whose Line is it Anyway is a cool show/

[CHAPTER 8: NATIVE FORTRESS]
They entered the warp hole, and fell to the ground on hard dirt.

'Hey, it wasn't a plothole after all!' said Luigi.

'Of course it wasn't,' said Crash. 'If it was a plothole Coco would be here.'

Suddenly Coco appeared out of nowhere.

(Creepy music)

'Who keeps on playing that creepy music?' asked Luigi.

(Creepy music)

'Found him!' said Crash. He dragged along a guy with a cassette player.

'Don't kill me, I'm just the sound effects guy!'

'Too late,' said Luigi as he sat on him.

'Coco! You're back!' said Crash.

'Yeah,' said Coco.

'Well,' said Nazza, 'tell us how you escaped.'

'No.'

'Yes.'

'No.'

'Do it Coco,' said Crash.

'No.'

'Nazza,' said Crash, 'I'm afraid you're going to have to do the scarily unthinkable.'

Nazza sighed. 'I suppose so. Coco, tell us and I'll kiss you.'

'I can't believe he did that,' whispered Luigi.

'Me either,' Crash whispered back.

'Okay, I'll tell you,' said Coco.

'Hurry up,' said Crash.

'Yeah, we want to see Nazza suffer,' said Luigi.

'Well, I was on the bridge...'

===FLASHBACK===

'I'll take care of this.'

'But Coco -'

'You'll be killed,' said Nazza.

===FAST FORWARD===

'YOU SHALL NOT PASS!' shouted Coco. She slammed the stick down, and the bridge cracked. The ice dragon, the bridge, and Coco, fell into the chasm.

'Coco!' shouted Nazza.

'Coco!' shouted Crash.

'Ice dragon!' shouted Luigi. 'I mean, chocolate!'

'It's Coco,' said Crash.

'Coco pops!' shouted Luigi.

'Stupid Luigi,' said Coco as she fell. She looked over and saw the ice dragon falling. 'Uh-oh, it might flame me.'

But somehow, the ice dragon had been killed when the bridge collapsed. Later forensics scientists found out it was a heart attack, caused most likely from Luigi's stupidity.

So Coco fell, and looked down. 'Eventually I'm gonna hit the ground, and I'm gonna die...'

Suddenly a snow tornado went over the crack in the glitchy level, and sucked her back up onto solid ground.

'Now to find a way outta here...'

===END FLASHBACK===

'So how did you get back here?' asked Crash.

'Yeah,' said Nazza. 'How?'

'I was walking through the level, then suddenly I fell down a plothole and appeared here.'

'Okay,' said Crash.

'Now, about what you said Nazza...' said Coco.

'Uh, I uh never said anything,' said Nazza, sweatdrops appearing on his forehead. 'No, I won't do it, no, get away, AAAAAAARGH!!!'

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

'That wasn't so bad, was it?' said Luigi jokingly.

'Shut up,' said Nazza, who was sitting on the ground with a pissed-off look on his face.

'I didn't think it was that bad,' said Coco.

'Hey, are we gonna start climbing this giant wall any time soon?' asked Crash.

'No,' said Nazza.

'Why not?'

'I'm still annoyed,' said Nazza.

'I wonder why,' said Luigi.

'Stop rubbing it in,' said Nazza.

'Can we start climbing now?' said Coco.

'No.'

'Well I'm gonna start climbing anyway,' said Crash.

'No.'

'Yes.'

'I'm outta here,' said Luigi.

And he walked away, and fell off the edge of a cliff.

'Whoops,' said Crash. 'Should've warned him about that.'

(Just so know, Luigi, I wasn't ripping you off just then - that would've happened no matter who it was)
(It just happened to be you)

'Can we start climbing now?' asked Coco.

'No.'

'Yes.'

'No.'

'Do it Nazza,' said Crash.

'No.'

'Coco,' said Crash, 'You know what to do.'

Coco smiled. 'Nazza, let us start climbing or I'll kiss you.'

'Okay, let's start climbing,' said Nazza.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

'I still think it would've been easier if we cut out a door,' said Nazza.

'But what if this fell down and collapsed on us?' said Coco. 'Then our faces might end up like Moe's in that episode of the Simpsons where he gets a facelift!'

'Uh, Crash,' said Nazza quietly, 'didn't you tell me a while ago she was living back in the seventies or something?'

'No...why would I say that?'

'I have no idea,' said Nazza.

Suddenly he got an idea. 'Maybe if I shake this thing it will fall, and we won't have to climb all the way up this big wooden fence, and we won't have to climb all the way back down this fence to the warp pad!'

'Huh?' said Coco.

'Nothing.'

Nazza began shaking at the fence.

'Nazza, what are you doing?' asked Crash.

'Nothing...' said Nazza. He continued shaking the fence, until it was quite noticeably noticeable.

'Nazza, stop it!' said Crash. 'What are you trying to do, get us killed?'

'No...'

'I hope you were being sarcastic,' said Crash.

'I'm the King of Sarcasm!'

Suddenly, the whole fence rumbled, and fell.

'Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee' BANG '- ow! That hurt!'

'Well of course it will hurt, we just knocked down a fence that was like a million miles high or something,' said Crash.

'But now I got us to the end of the island and D'OH!'

'Ha ha!' said Coco. 'Didn't count on there being *another* wall, did you?'

'Why must you taunt me?' said Nazza. 'Why must you mock me!'

'Coz you look cute when you're in despair,' said Coco.

'I'm over it.'

'Do we start climbing again?' asked Crash.

'I suppose so,' said Nazza. 'I want to get to the end of the island.'

'Why?' asked Coco.

'Because then you say goodbye to me, and I go onto the next island!'

'I see...' said Coco. She began deviously planning a devious plan.

'I hope you're not planning something devious,' said Nazza.

'No...why would you think that?'

'It just popped into my head.'

'I see...' said Coco.

So they began climbing again.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

'You know,' said Nazza, 'it would've been easier if we'd taken the elevator.'

'Oh, so you wait until we're halfway up the fence before you tell us about the elevator, HUH?' said Coco.

'I'm scared,' Nazza said quietly to Crash. 'Isn't she sposed to like me?'

'It's her time of the month,' Crash replied.

'I see...' said Nazza.

Nazza continued climbing. 'Hey! If we climb over to the elevator and wait, we can hop on it?'

'Oh, so you wait until we're halfway up the fence before you tell us how we can catch the elevator, HUH?'

'How long is she gonna be like this?' whispered Nazza.

'Unfortunately a while,' Crash replied.

So Nazza climbed over to the elevator, waited until it came by and jumped on it. 'Ha ha! I'm on the elevator and you're not!'

'Uh, Nazza, the elevator has to go all the way down before it can come back up,' shouted Crash.

'D'OH!'

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

As Nazza came back up, he saw Crash and Coco were near the elevator's cable thingy.

'You guys gonna jump onto this platform?' shouted Nazza.

'Nah, we're not, HUH?' shouted Coco.

As he came up, they jumped onto the elevator. 'How much longer do you think it will take?' asked Nazza.

'A few more minutes,' Crash said.

===AN HOUR LATER===

'This definitely isn't a few minutes,' said Crash.

'Yeah, NAZZA! It's not a few minutes, HUH?' said Coco.

'Why do you keep saying HUH?' asked Crash.

'Why do you wanna know, HUH?'

Nazza leant over to Crash and whispered 'I don't know what's worse, Coco when she likes me or Coco when she hates me.'

'Luckily I only have to put up with one,' Crash replied.

'Just you wait, just you wait...'

'You planning on doing something?'

'No...what makes you think that?'

'Hey look!' said Coco. 'We're nearly at the top!'

They arrived at the top and jumped onto a small platform, only just big enough for them all.

'How are we going to get across?' said Nazza, pointing to a bigger platform on the other side of the giant fence, where the warp pad was.

'We go very slowly, so that we don't knock it down,' said Crash. 'Like someone else did just a few minutes ago. Not saying names, *Nazza*.'

'Well there are prop-thingies holding this one up,' said Nazza. 'So we can't knock it down.'

'Don't try knocking it down then.'

'I won't.'

'Okay then.'

Nazza slowly and carefully balanced his way across the giant wooden-pole-steak fence, when a strange animal jumped in front of him acting like a gorilla.

'Get out of my way Colin Mochrie!' shouted Nazza, pushing him off.

He continued walking along, and made it to the warp pad.

Crash and Coco did the same.

Yes, I just can't be bothered describing it to you.

'Let's jump into the warp pad now,' said Coco.

'Where will it take us?' asked Nazza. 'After all, this *is* the last level on this island.'

'It'll take us to the place where the boat is,' said Crash.

So they jumped into the warp pad.

A/N: Hehe no offence to any Colin fans (Colin is actually my favourite "Whose Line is it Anyway?" person)...ok, I couldn't think of anyone to put in as a cameo :S