Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, the eighty-seven-line puppet-
show.
A/N: They're numbered so I don't get confused. Sorry. It's not a list, I promise! Just a puppet show, it is, really. Go ahead and read the first half, and if you want more, review!
1. Harry: I am in a flowerbed. Wohoo. Um, why? This doesn't make sense...oh, well.
2. Ron: Hey, Harry, you have to come to my house again!
3. Harry: Okay! Am I wasting a line here?
4. Ginny: Wow. I think my crush on you is back, Harry. You should be either pleased...or not pleased.
5. Harry: Time to go back to school!
6. Hermione: Yay!
7. Ron: Did you go to Bulgaria?
8. Hermione: I'm not going to answer that.
9. Ron: I am mad because Hermione won't answer my question about Bulgaria.
10. Hermione: I'm still not going to answer that.
11. Ron: I'm still mad.
12. Harry: Shut up.
13. Trewlaney: This number is unlucky - Harry, you will die!
14. Harry: Big whoop. Like I didn't already know that.
15. Harry: Wohoo. I should find something out on this line, but since the author of this fanfiction hasn't read the story yet, that would be kinda impossible. I am smarter now!
16. Ron: I will be this number in March. Should we get on with the story?
17. Hermione: As the story's nearly 900 pages long, we should.
18. Ron: I think this is the line where I tell Hermione I am crushing on her. But I'm too nervous.
19. Hermione: I heard that.
20. Ron: Oops. I'll go hide now.
21. Harry: We have to try out for Quidditch now, Ron, so stop hiding from Hermione and go outside. I am the captain now (at least, the author of this fanfiction thinks I am) and you will be the keeper.
22. Ron: Wow! Cool!
23. Hermione: I can see you. Run away, or I will be forced to tell you that I like you.
24. Ron: Aaaahhh!
25. Harry: Okay, you're the Keeper, now go snog Hermione or something, preferably somewhere where I can't see you.
26. Ron: Okay!
27. Harry: Uh oh, Defense Against the Dark Arts class.
28. New Teacher: I'm your new teacher. Fear me!
29. Class: We fear you! *scream*
30. New Teacher: Jeez, not that much.
31. Class: Oh. We don't fear you - that much!
32. Harry: Go easy on 'em, their last one was evil.
33. Class: EVIL!! EEEEVIL!!!
34. New Teacher: Oohh-kayyy.
35. Winky: I am Winky! And I AM ANGRY! GRRR!
36. Hermione: Winky, you have to quit your job and stir up a rebellion!
37. Winky: GET AWAY FROM ME!!!!!
38. Hermione: Jeez, gosh, jeez, goodness, jeez!
39. McGonagall: There is some formal event in which Weasley will be wearing the new dress robes his brothers bought him with oh-so-mysterious money. And now, over to Dumbledore, with important information for Harry. What do you have to tell us tonight, Albus?
40. Dumbledore: Well, Minerva - It is time, for me to tell you what I should have told you five years ago Harry. Please sit down. I am going to tell you everything. *whispers in Harry's ear*
41. Harry: Oh! *blush* I - I know all about that, Professor, you don't have to tell me - er - 42. Dumbledore: Darn it! Why did Sirius have to chicken out at the last minute?
43. Sirius: Chicken? Where? I'm hungry, give me chicken!
~*~
End first half. I'm just too lazy to write the rest right now. Please review, I would be most pleased if you thought my mock-funniness was funny!
show.
A/N: They're numbered so I don't get confused. Sorry. It's not a list, I promise! Just a puppet show, it is, really. Go ahead and read the first half, and if you want more, review!
1. Harry: I am in a flowerbed. Wohoo. Um, why? This doesn't make sense...oh, well.
2. Ron: Hey, Harry, you have to come to my house again!
3. Harry: Okay! Am I wasting a line here?
4. Ginny: Wow. I think my crush on you is back, Harry. You should be either pleased...or not pleased.
5. Harry: Time to go back to school!
6. Hermione: Yay!
7. Ron: Did you go to Bulgaria?
8. Hermione: I'm not going to answer that.
9. Ron: I am mad because Hermione won't answer my question about Bulgaria.
10. Hermione: I'm still not going to answer that.
11. Ron: I'm still mad.
12. Harry: Shut up.
13. Trewlaney: This number is unlucky - Harry, you will die!
14. Harry: Big whoop. Like I didn't already know that.
15. Harry: Wohoo. I should find something out on this line, but since the author of this fanfiction hasn't read the story yet, that would be kinda impossible. I am smarter now!
16. Ron: I will be this number in March. Should we get on with the story?
17. Hermione: As the story's nearly 900 pages long, we should.
18. Ron: I think this is the line where I tell Hermione I am crushing on her. But I'm too nervous.
19. Hermione: I heard that.
20. Ron: Oops. I'll go hide now.
21. Harry: We have to try out for Quidditch now, Ron, so stop hiding from Hermione and go outside. I am the captain now (at least, the author of this fanfiction thinks I am) and you will be the keeper.
22. Ron: Wow! Cool!
23. Hermione: I can see you. Run away, or I will be forced to tell you that I like you.
24. Ron: Aaaahhh!
25. Harry: Okay, you're the Keeper, now go snog Hermione or something, preferably somewhere where I can't see you.
26. Ron: Okay!
27. Harry: Uh oh, Defense Against the Dark Arts class.
28. New Teacher: I'm your new teacher. Fear me!
29. Class: We fear you! *scream*
30. New Teacher: Jeez, not that much.
31. Class: Oh. We don't fear you - that much!
32. Harry: Go easy on 'em, their last one was evil.
33. Class: EVIL!! EEEEVIL!!!
34. New Teacher: Oohh-kayyy.
35. Winky: I am Winky! And I AM ANGRY! GRRR!
36. Hermione: Winky, you have to quit your job and stir up a rebellion!
37. Winky: GET AWAY FROM ME!!!!!
38. Hermione: Jeez, gosh, jeez, goodness, jeez!
39. McGonagall: There is some formal event in which Weasley will be wearing the new dress robes his brothers bought him with oh-so-mysterious money. And now, over to Dumbledore, with important information for Harry. What do you have to tell us tonight, Albus?
40. Dumbledore: Well, Minerva - It is time, for me to tell you what I should have told you five years ago Harry. Please sit down. I am going to tell you everything. *whispers in Harry's ear*
41. Harry: Oh! *blush* I - I know all about that, Professor, you don't have to tell me - er - 42. Dumbledore: Darn it! Why did Sirius have to chicken out at the last minute?
43. Sirius: Chicken? Where? I'm hungry, give me chicken!
~*~
End first half. I'm just too lazy to write the rest right now. Please review, I would be most pleased if you thought my mock-funniness was funny!