The Simple Things
Disclaimer: Don't own the characters or the great lyrics
Summary: Jess's story, before and through the transfer to SH.
A/N On every chapter there's going to be a song by "ALL" which the chapter is kinda based on ;D
Thank you all my great reviewers!!!
ILoveJess – I have a problem with my explorer so I can't review/respond until I'll format it again, but I just had to thank you for your wonderful reviews, just so you know, I sat last night to write this chapter just in order to thank you so much. You really gave me a lot of motivation to write more. I've read some of you're work and I especially liked 'The dance' and 'No regrets' I'm going to read the others tomorrow after I'll finish this chapter. (It's already 4:00am here) I hope you'll like this one too it's definitely dedicated to you!! ;D
Chapter 3 – Auto Wreck
Adrian.
You know how it is, when you're most vulnerable the wrong kinds of people seem to smell it.
They're pro's. Know your weak points and use them all against you.
Adrian was a Pro. He played me like matter.
He found me, on the green bench, sitting, gazing, lost.
He offered me what I needed most then. A distraction.
And in return I did things for him. As long as I had a diversion, my conscious didn't bother me. The most important thing was that I didn't feel this great void anymore. Nothing else counted. It's not like I had a future or a family, or my heart to risk.
I had nothing. Nobody.
At first he wasn't very demanding, a little deal here a little delivery there.
But I was a quick learner and I've always had good instincts. Soon enough I became his best boy, his little star.
In return I got not just the easy money, or the 'respect', I also had that spark back, the thrill revived me, made me feel alive. If not love, I'll compromise on fear, excitement.
I myself never did drugs though, I might have not had a lot to live for, but I needed my mind to stay lucid. I knew if I'll do drugs, I'm signing my own death sentence and I might have been self destructive, but I was never suicidal.
I had my limits set to conventional cigarettes and I always made sure I didn't drink that last 'knock out' drink, didn't want to look like my beloved mother. Maybe she did set an example to me... How I didn't want to end up.
As the time passed, Adrian became more demanding. He saw my 'potential' and decided I was worth investing in. So he began to teach me.
The things he showed me. It was too easy. That kind of lifestyle.
I was playing the big kids' sandbox now.
Going downhill.
I needed someone to say 'no' to me.
I needed someone to stop me. Because I knew that I wouldn't stop it by myself.
And if it wasn't about to happen quickly, I was doomed. Gone.
Every person it seems, needs to have some limits to guide themselves through life.
My limits were not enough to hold me a live for much longer. I was vaguely aware of it.
Maybe that was the reason I got caught. 'Cause when I think about it, I was too good at my 'chores' to just accidentally be caught.
I was damn good at it.
I had to get caught. If I wanted to live.
-------------------------------------------
"Auto Wreck" By ALL
Where you going?
Do you even care?
Driven to distraction
Drives you to despair
You just spin your wheels
I recognize the panic
That your confidence conceals
It's your life
You decide
You're in control
Enjoy the ride
I hope when you begin to slide
That you know how to stop in time
Heading for a head on
Can't you see the signs?
You can't even see the road
Just the little white lines
The needle rides on empty
You exhale the exhaust
You smile and nod your head and tell me
That you're sure you're not lost
Asleep at the wheel, open your eyes
This is for real, this is your life
Fast as hell isn't to fast to die
Drive on by
Riding high
It's an easy life
Kiss it goodbye
Disclaimer: Don't own the characters or the great lyrics
Summary: Jess's story, before and through the transfer to SH.
A/N On every chapter there's going to be a song by "ALL" which the chapter is kinda based on ;D
Thank you all my great reviewers!!!
ILoveJess – I have a problem with my explorer so I can't review/respond until I'll format it again, but I just had to thank you for your wonderful reviews, just so you know, I sat last night to write this chapter just in order to thank you so much. You really gave me a lot of motivation to write more. I've read some of you're work and I especially liked 'The dance' and 'No regrets' I'm going to read the others tomorrow after I'll finish this chapter. (It's already 4:00am here) I hope you'll like this one too it's definitely dedicated to you!! ;D
Chapter 3 – Auto Wreck
Adrian.
You know how it is, when you're most vulnerable the wrong kinds of people seem to smell it.
They're pro's. Know your weak points and use them all against you.
Adrian was a Pro. He played me like matter.
He found me, on the green bench, sitting, gazing, lost.
He offered me what I needed most then. A distraction.
And in return I did things for him. As long as I had a diversion, my conscious didn't bother me. The most important thing was that I didn't feel this great void anymore. Nothing else counted. It's not like I had a future or a family, or my heart to risk.
I had nothing. Nobody.
At first he wasn't very demanding, a little deal here a little delivery there.
But I was a quick learner and I've always had good instincts. Soon enough I became his best boy, his little star.
In return I got not just the easy money, or the 'respect', I also had that spark back, the thrill revived me, made me feel alive. If not love, I'll compromise on fear, excitement.
I myself never did drugs though, I might have not had a lot to live for, but I needed my mind to stay lucid. I knew if I'll do drugs, I'm signing my own death sentence and I might have been self destructive, but I was never suicidal.
I had my limits set to conventional cigarettes and I always made sure I didn't drink that last 'knock out' drink, didn't want to look like my beloved mother. Maybe she did set an example to me... How I didn't want to end up.
As the time passed, Adrian became more demanding. He saw my 'potential' and decided I was worth investing in. So he began to teach me.
The things he showed me. It was too easy. That kind of lifestyle.
I was playing the big kids' sandbox now.
Going downhill.
I needed someone to say 'no' to me.
I needed someone to stop me. Because I knew that I wouldn't stop it by myself.
And if it wasn't about to happen quickly, I was doomed. Gone.
Every person it seems, needs to have some limits to guide themselves through life.
My limits were not enough to hold me a live for much longer. I was vaguely aware of it.
Maybe that was the reason I got caught. 'Cause when I think about it, I was too good at my 'chores' to just accidentally be caught.
I was damn good at it.
I had to get caught. If I wanted to live.
-------------------------------------------
"Auto Wreck" By ALL
Where you going?
Do you even care?
Driven to distraction
Drives you to despair
You just spin your wheels
I recognize the panic
That your confidence conceals
It's your life
You decide
You're in control
Enjoy the ride
I hope when you begin to slide
That you know how to stop in time
Heading for a head on
Can't you see the signs?
You can't even see the road
Just the little white lines
The needle rides on empty
You exhale the exhaust
You smile and nod your head and tell me
That you're sure you're not lost
Asleep at the wheel, open your eyes
This is for real, this is your life
Fast as hell isn't to fast to die
Drive on by
Riding high
It's an easy life
Kiss it goodbye