Dear Die-ary
Ch. 3: Three Years later...
A/n: This is Devi's POV. That's all I'm saying. Evanescence owns the song "My Immortal". I'm lonely. My friends have all abandoned me...(sniffs)... I'll be doing a Johnny/Jimmy thing soon. Dear god I never thought I'd say those words. I own Samara. I think the term 'Mim' is cute, even though it's another word for aunt, I don't care!
I wish you could see her, Johnny. My little girl has so much of her father in her. I can see you in her eyes. She has your eyes. Samara's third birthday was last week. She always asks where you are. Even though she never got the chance to know you, she still asks why you never come to the picnics we have. I know she can hear me crying at night. It's been three years and I still can't let you go.
"Mim, where's Papa?"
*I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone...*
Papa's gone, Samara. I've told you that before. Be careful, darling, or you'll lose your ball. She and the boy who lived next to you, Todd, are good friends. Todd asks about you from time to time. Samara, no!
"Uh-oh...Mim! Mim! My ball, it rolled into the old house! The one next to Squee's!"
Johnny, are you trying to tell me something? You were nothing but a human riddle... that craved to be solved. I nearly had the answer. But you stole it from me three years ago. I want to move on, but I can't. Something is holding me back. Samara, don't go into that house!
"I found it, Mim!"
Memories. This house brings back some of the most painful ones that I've ever had to deal with. The attempt on my life...And watching you take yours.
+ These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me+
I can feel you here. Hear your dying breaths. Why, dammit, why...Why?! On that night, I was going to tell you that I was carrying your child, Johnny. Instead, I found you lying on the floor, dying. Why did you leave me? How will Samara ever be able to cope with never knowing her father? Why did you leave me?
"I never really left,"
Johnny?
"PAPA!!"
*You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chases away all the sanity in me...*
Are you alive, or a ghost?
"I wish I could touch our daughter, I've missed you..."
Are you in heaven or hell?
"Papa! Why don't ever come play with me?"
"Samara, so this is my daughter..."
She seems to be more like you than me. She's quiet, and doesn't express her feelings. She paints, like you used to...
* + These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me+*
You yearn to hold her, don't you? I'd give anything to hold your hand again.
"Devi... I-I'm so sorry, I never realized how much my death had hurt you until I looked into our daughter's eyes... You need to move on, forget me. I know that you only wake up in the morning to see our child smile. I'm still here, in Samara."
* I've tried to hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all along*
Kiss me, Johnny...
A/N: Oh sweet mother of noodles! I am getting WAY too involved in writing romances!!!!! I am THAT lonely...
Ch. 3: Three Years later...
A/n: This is Devi's POV. That's all I'm saying. Evanescence owns the song "My Immortal". I'm lonely. My friends have all abandoned me...(sniffs)... I'll be doing a Johnny/Jimmy thing soon. Dear god I never thought I'd say those words. I own Samara. I think the term 'Mim' is cute, even though it's another word for aunt, I don't care!
I wish you could see her, Johnny. My little girl has so much of her father in her. I can see you in her eyes. She has your eyes. Samara's third birthday was last week. She always asks where you are. Even though she never got the chance to know you, she still asks why you never come to the picnics we have. I know she can hear me crying at night. It's been three years and I still can't let you go.
"Mim, where's Papa?"
*I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Because your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone...*
Papa's gone, Samara. I've told you that before. Be careful, darling, or you'll lose your ball. She and the boy who lived next to you, Todd, are good friends. Todd asks about you from time to time. Samara, no!
"Uh-oh...Mim! Mim! My ball, it rolled into the old house! The one next to Squee's!"
Johnny, are you trying to tell me something? You were nothing but a human riddle... that craved to be solved. I nearly had the answer. But you stole it from me three years ago. I want to move on, but I can't. Something is holding me back. Samara, don't go into that house!
"I found it, Mim!"
Memories. This house brings back some of the most painful ones that I've ever had to deal with. The attempt on my life...And watching you take yours.
+ These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me+
I can feel you here. Hear your dying breaths. Why, dammit, why...Why?! On that night, I was going to tell you that I was carrying your child, Johnny. Instead, I found you lying on the floor, dying. Why did you leave me? How will Samara ever be able to cope with never knowing her father? Why did you leave me?
"I never really left,"
Johnny?
"PAPA!!"
*You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chases away all the sanity in me...*
Are you alive, or a ghost?
"I wish I could touch our daughter, I've missed you..."
Are you in heaven or hell?
"Papa! Why don't ever come play with me?"
"Samara, so this is my daughter..."
She seems to be more like you than me. She's quiet, and doesn't express her feelings. She paints, like you used to...
* + These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all of me+*
You yearn to hold her, don't you? I'd give anything to hold your hand again.
"Devi... I-I'm so sorry, I never realized how much my death had hurt you until I looked into our daughter's eyes... You need to move on, forget me. I know that you only wake up in the morning to see our child smile. I'm still here, in Samara."
* I've tried to hard to tell myself that you're gone
And though you're still with me
I've been alone all along*
Kiss me, Johnny...
A/N: Oh sweet mother of noodles! I am getting WAY too involved in writing romances!!!!! I am THAT lonely...