A/N: I'm doing a story about Hiei and what he would be like if he was obsessed with chocolate. So, I'm doing this story for fun and I just have to say I'm sorry if I hurt any Hiei fans out there. So, I hope you like it!
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Hiei's Chocolate Obsession
By Kurama's Kawaiiest Fangirl
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Our story begins at the grocery store. Hiei, Kuwabara, and Kurama are shopping and they head down the candy aisle and Hiei stops at a package of Oreos and rips open a package and scarfs them down
Hiei: Mmmmmm……Oreos…..Soooooo, gooooood….*Begins to drool* *Kuwabara stares at Hiei and notices that his eyes got so big that they look like they're gonna explode*
Kuwabara: *To Kurama* What's the matter with Hiei?
Kurama: Well, if I know Hiei, and trust me I know. There's only two times when his eyes get that big. One he eats the fertilizer, and trust me it's not a pretty sight.
Kuwabara: And the second?
Kurama: When he eats chocolate….I remember the last time it happened.
*Flashback*
Hiei is scarfing down chocolate and Kurama is watching in amazement.
Kurama: *Thinking* I never seen someone eat chocolate so fast….and I can't believe that he tried to eat Yusuke's shirt which only had a tiny chocolate stain on it, he licked at it for 12 hours straight and repeatedly saying "I must get it all you hear me?!!! ALLLLLLLLL!! MWHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!" oh well. *Out loud* You might want-
Hiei: CHOCOLATE!!!!!!! GIVE ME MOOOOOOOORE!!!!!
Kurama: Uh…Hiei? You're getting some drool on my shirt…. *Hiei rips it off and starts licking the shirt frantically* That was my favorite shirt! *Sigh* I guess I can always get a new one….nah.
End of Flashback
After Kurama was done telling his story he had already noticed that Hiei put in all the packages of Oreos in that he could find. Then Kurama turned to Hiei to see him fighting with an old man for the last package of Oreos.
Hiei: Give it to me! *Pulls on the Oreos and the old man pulls on the Oreos.*
Old Man: I've fathered 19 kids. Don't you think I suffered enough?
Hiei: I don't care how much you suffered! *Pulls on the Oreos* *Hisses*
Old Man: I'm very old…109 to be exact.
Hiei: I can tell.
Old Man: *Talking while straining to get the Oreos* Listen…*They both stop pulling* If I want to die I wanna die happy! *Snags Oreos away from Hiei's hands and starts to laugh evilly*
Hiei: *Shouting* Give that back Old Man!!! *Kicks him in the balls and the Old Man drops and is lying in the fetal position the Oreos and Hiei grabs them while sweatdrops are coming down Kurama's and Kuwabara's heads* Who's laughing now Old Man?! WHO'S LAUGHING NOW?!!! *Puts Oreos in the cart and runs back and forth down the aisle shoving candy in the cart repeatedly*
Kuwabara: I think Hiei went down the deep end…
Kurama: No, he hasn't got there yet, it takes him awhile.
Kuwabara: Don't you think the cart is getting a little full? *As he and Kurama look down at the cart and it has almost all of the sweets with chocolates in the cart*
Kurama: No, not yet. Let's go follow Hiei, he's going down to the pudding section of the store.
Kuwabara: Are you is going to let him to do this?
Kurama: Hey, I got all the food for Koenma's party. As long as I got that done I really don't care how Hiei gets his sweets.
Kuwabara: Yeah, I agree with you, but my main question is how is Hiei gonna pay for all this?
Kurama: We can only guess my friend. We can only guess…heck he could steal it.
Hiei runs down to the refrigerated pudding section and starts to pile in chocolate pudding. After 5 minutes Hiei has all the chocolate puddings in the cart but one, a baby in a cart seat is gripping on to it and won't let go of it.
Hiei: Give it to me! *Pulling really hard on the pudding while the baby isn't struggling at all and yet getting Hiei's pudding!* Give it to me! I'm warning you! * The baby still doesn't let go* Fine, I warned you!! *Starts to power up for Darkness of the Dragon Flame*
Kurama: *Sweatdrop* NO! Uh…*Starts looking frantically for a pudding and he sees one on the floor and picks it up* Here. Here is a pudding.
Hiei: *In whiny voice and points to the baby* But I want that one!
Kurama: You can't have that one now let's go. *Hiei groans as the head to a cash register and start to put their groceries on* Hiei how exactly are you going to pay for all those sweets?
Hiei: Oh, don't worry. I'll take care of everything.
Kuwabara: And how's that?
Kurama: *Hiei takes out Yusuke's credit card* *sweatdrop* Yusuke won't be happy…oh, who cares? He's never happy.
Register dude: That will be 1,000,000
Hiei: Here ya go *Gives register dude the credit card and soon, he gets it back*. I think that maxed it out.
Kurama: Did you max it out on purpose?
Hiei: What do you think?
Kurama: I think I shouldn't have asked. Let's head to Koenma's house. It's getting pretty close to starting. So, let's go. * Hiei and Kuwabara head over to Koenma's and Hiei is eating the chocolate while heading to his house.*
When they get there all the decorations were set up and it was about an hour before the party started. The party was basically for Koenma because it was his birthday. His dad couldn't make it because he was too busy. None the guests arrived yet, except for Yusuke, Botan, Shizuru, Yukina, and Kayko who were putting the last of the decorations up when Hiei, Kuwabara and Kurama arrived.
Koenma: Oh, good you're finally here! What took you so long?
Kuwabara: Let's just say it's better if we don't discuss it.
Kurama: Yeah, weird things can happen at a place where people are beating you up to get the last chocolate chips. So, where do we put all this stuff?
Koenma: Put it in the kitchen. What's the matter with Hiei? *He glances at Hiei and Hiei is scarfing down some pudding*
Kurama: Hmm? Oh, nothing. He usually acts that way. *Kurama, Hiei and Kuwabara head to the kitchen with bags in each hand. Which is mostly containing chocolate but Kurama decided it would be better not to tell Koenma*
By the time the party started Hiei had eaten all of his chocolate and was extremely hyper. He ran around the room where the party was being held and he poured 100 cups of punch. Then soon Koenma was going to give a speech.
Koenma: I would like to thank you all for coming. I'd like to thank my team for all the battles they did and I just want them to know that at the Dark Tournament I never doubted that they would win.
Ogre: *Whispering in Koenma's ear* You were always doubting they would win.
Koenma: *Hits Ogre in the face and continues with speech* I always knew they would win because they're a strong team that can win any battle, no matter how weak they are, I still believed in them. And since it's my birthday they were so nice, they wanted to make a statue of me.
Yusuke: More liked forced.
Genkai: Stupid Bastard. It took 19 hours straight to finish that damn statue. I'M A FIGHTER, NOT A SCULPTOR!!! DAMN YOU ROTTEN KID!! *Flips Koenma off*
Koenma: Oh, look Genkai's waving to me. Hi Genkai!.
Genkai: *Muttering* Damn kid….
Ogre: There's something I need to tell you. Something about Hiei.
Koenma: Not now Ogre. Can't you see I'm busy? Now, without further ado, I present to you Koenma!
Everybody is staring at the statue which is entirely made out of chocolate but that's not the part they're shocked at, Hiei ripped the Koenma's statue's dick with his teeth and started to eat it. And not only that but there was a giant crater where the face was supposed to be.
Koenma: What is he doing to my statue?
Ogre: Well, Hiei gets hyper when he eats chocolate.
Koenma: You never told me that!
Ogre: I tried to.
*flashback*
Genkai, Botan, Yusuke, Kurama and Kuwabara were working on the statue. Kurama told Koenma that Hiei couldn't participate for personal reasons.
Genkai: I don't know why I have to help make statue for a stupid baby.
Koenma: Because you're part of the team and since in my speech I say that the team made it for me, well, add them together .
Genkai: Stupid brat…Don't people think I suffered enough? Noooooooooooooooo, people have to shove more labor work into me before I die.
Ogre: I need to tell why Hiei can't participate.
Koenma: Can't you see I'm busy here?!
Ogre: But it's important!
Koenma: So, is this! I don't have time to sniff the roses or talk to you! I'm very busy!
Ogre: But I really need to tell you!!
Koenma: What is it of "I'm busy" don't you understand?!! When I say "I'm busy" it means I'm busy! I don't have time to talk!!
Ogre: Yes, sir…
Genkai: *Thinking* I'll get my revenge for him making me do this slave work. *Genkai powers up for an attack and shoots it right in the face making a giant crater in the face* *Out loud* That will teach you what happens when you mess with an old prune like me!!!
Koenma: What?! What happened to my face! My poor statue! Fix it right now!
Botan: We're out of chocolate!
Koenma: Oh, well. I guess some things just can't be fixed.
*End of flashback*
People are basically looking at 2 things. Hiei eating the Koenma statue's dick or the face that looks like a crater.
Ogre: I hate to tell you I told you so, but I did tell you so. But did you listen? Nooooooooooooooo. You were too busy gawking at your statue to be told that when Hiei eats chocolate he gets really hyper and can't stop.
Koenma: Okay, okay. No, need to rub it in…
Yusuke: So, Hiei gets hyper when he eats chocolate?
Kurama: *Nervously* And fertilizer…
Yusuke: What?! You knew?!!!! Why didn't you tell me?!
Kurama: *Nervously* Well, you-you were busy.
Yusuke: Well, I better go stop him. *Yusuke heads over to Hiei who has finished eating the dick and is now climbing on the statue again and trying to pull the pacifier out* Now, it's time to stop Hiei. *Hiei growls at Yusuke and keeps trying to pull the pacifier out* Hiei let's go!! *Pulls on Hiei's arm and Hiei bites Yusuke's hand* OW!!! He bit me!
Kurama: Awwwww….he wants to be your friend.
Yusuke: Ha, ha, very funny. I'd like to see you try.
Kurama: All right. Hiei come here, *singsong* I have chocolate…*Waves candy bar in the air in front of Hiei and Hiei comes over*
Yusuke: Hey! That was a bribe! You cheated!
Kurama: So? I got him to come didn't I? Besides it's only a soy bar.
Yusuke: Yeah, a CHOCOLATE soy bar.
Kurama: Listen all we have to do now is get him home.
Yusuke: I'm not doing it.
Kurama: Well, don't look at me. I'm not doing it.
Yusuke: I gotta take Kayko home, and Kuwabara just left a couple minutes ago with Shizuru and Yukina.
Kurama: What if…? *He walks over to Botan* Botan we have a favor to ask you. Can you take Hiei home?
Botan: Uh…okay. *Botan takes Hiei home and Hiei gets ready for bed and gets in the bed, and falls asleep* Oh, he's so cute when he's asleep…
Hiei: Botan?
Botan: Huh? What is it Hiei?
Hiei: Well, I was wondering…never mind it's a dumb question anyway….
Botan: What? What is it?
Hiei: Well, I was wondering if we could…*quickly* go on a date. But I know what you would say, you would say no because it's embarrassing having a freaky hyper person around you.
Botan: Actually, I think you're cute when you're hyper.
Hiei: Really? So, what about that date?
Botan: I'd love to Hiei. What about tomorrow night at 7:00 P.M.?
Hiei: That sounds great. So, I'll pick you up tomorrow at 7:00.
Botan: Now I gotta get going. *Kisses Hiei on the cheek* Bye, Hiei
The End
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A/N: Well what did you think of it? Pleeeeeease review!
Preview: In my next story Hiei and Botan go on a date and Hiei goes hyper! Will everything turn out in the end? Find out in my next episode!!
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Hiei's Chocolate Obsession
By Kurama's Kawaiiest Fangirl
~*~
Our story begins at the grocery store. Hiei, Kuwabara, and Kurama are shopping and they head down the candy aisle and Hiei stops at a package of Oreos and rips open a package and scarfs them down
Hiei: Mmmmmm……Oreos…..Soooooo, gooooood….*Begins to drool* *Kuwabara stares at Hiei and notices that his eyes got so big that they look like they're gonna explode*
Kuwabara: *To Kurama* What's the matter with Hiei?
Kurama: Well, if I know Hiei, and trust me I know. There's only two times when his eyes get that big. One he eats the fertilizer, and trust me it's not a pretty sight.
Kuwabara: And the second?
Kurama: When he eats chocolate….I remember the last time it happened.
*Flashback*
Hiei is scarfing down chocolate and Kurama is watching in amazement.
Kurama: *Thinking* I never seen someone eat chocolate so fast….and I can't believe that he tried to eat Yusuke's shirt which only had a tiny chocolate stain on it, he licked at it for 12 hours straight and repeatedly saying "I must get it all you hear me?!!! ALLLLLLLLL!! MWHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!" oh well. *Out loud* You might want-
Hiei: CHOCOLATE!!!!!!! GIVE ME MOOOOOOOORE!!!!!
Kurama: Uh…Hiei? You're getting some drool on my shirt…. *Hiei rips it off and starts licking the shirt frantically* That was my favorite shirt! *Sigh* I guess I can always get a new one….nah.
End of Flashback
After Kurama was done telling his story he had already noticed that Hiei put in all the packages of Oreos in that he could find. Then Kurama turned to Hiei to see him fighting with an old man for the last package of Oreos.
Hiei: Give it to me! *Pulls on the Oreos and the old man pulls on the Oreos.*
Old Man: I've fathered 19 kids. Don't you think I suffered enough?
Hiei: I don't care how much you suffered! *Pulls on the Oreos* *Hisses*
Old Man: I'm very old…109 to be exact.
Hiei: I can tell.
Old Man: *Talking while straining to get the Oreos* Listen…*They both stop pulling* If I want to die I wanna die happy! *Snags Oreos away from Hiei's hands and starts to laugh evilly*
Hiei: *Shouting* Give that back Old Man!!! *Kicks him in the balls and the Old Man drops and is lying in the fetal position the Oreos and Hiei grabs them while sweatdrops are coming down Kurama's and Kuwabara's heads* Who's laughing now Old Man?! WHO'S LAUGHING NOW?!!! *Puts Oreos in the cart and runs back and forth down the aisle shoving candy in the cart repeatedly*
Kuwabara: I think Hiei went down the deep end…
Kurama: No, he hasn't got there yet, it takes him awhile.
Kuwabara: Don't you think the cart is getting a little full? *As he and Kurama look down at the cart and it has almost all of the sweets with chocolates in the cart*
Kurama: No, not yet. Let's go follow Hiei, he's going down to the pudding section of the store.
Kuwabara: Are you is going to let him to do this?
Kurama: Hey, I got all the food for Koenma's party. As long as I got that done I really don't care how Hiei gets his sweets.
Kuwabara: Yeah, I agree with you, but my main question is how is Hiei gonna pay for all this?
Kurama: We can only guess my friend. We can only guess…heck he could steal it.
Hiei runs down to the refrigerated pudding section and starts to pile in chocolate pudding. After 5 minutes Hiei has all the chocolate puddings in the cart but one, a baby in a cart seat is gripping on to it and won't let go of it.
Hiei: Give it to me! *Pulling really hard on the pudding while the baby isn't struggling at all and yet getting Hiei's pudding!* Give it to me! I'm warning you! * The baby still doesn't let go* Fine, I warned you!! *Starts to power up for Darkness of the Dragon Flame*
Kurama: *Sweatdrop* NO! Uh…*Starts looking frantically for a pudding and he sees one on the floor and picks it up* Here. Here is a pudding.
Hiei: *In whiny voice and points to the baby* But I want that one!
Kurama: You can't have that one now let's go. *Hiei groans as the head to a cash register and start to put their groceries on* Hiei how exactly are you going to pay for all those sweets?
Hiei: Oh, don't worry. I'll take care of everything.
Kuwabara: And how's that?
Kurama: *Hiei takes out Yusuke's credit card* *sweatdrop* Yusuke won't be happy…oh, who cares? He's never happy.
Register dude: That will be 1,000,000
Hiei: Here ya go *Gives register dude the credit card and soon, he gets it back*. I think that maxed it out.
Kurama: Did you max it out on purpose?
Hiei: What do you think?
Kurama: I think I shouldn't have asked. Let's head to Koenma's house. It's getting pretty close to starting. So, let's go. * Hiei and Kuwabara head over to Koenma's and Hiei is eating the chocolate while heading to his house.*
When they get there all the decorations were set up and it was about an hour before the party started. The party was basically for Koenma because it was his birthday. His dad couldn't make it because he was too busy. None the guests arrived yet, except for Yusuke, Botan, Shizuru, Yukina, and Kayko who were putting the last of the decorations up when Hiei, Kuwabara and Kurama arrived.
Koenma: Oh, good you're finally here! What took you so long?
Kuwabara: Let's just say it's better if we don't discuss it.
Kurama: Yeah, weird things can happen at a place where people are beating you up to get the last chocolate chips. So, where do we put all this stuff?
Koenma: Put it in the kitchen. What's the matter with Hiei? *He glances at Hiei and Hiei is scarfing down some pudding*
Kurama: Hmm? Oh, nothing. He usually acts that way. *Kurama, Hiei and Kuwabara head to the kitchen with bags in each hand. Which is mostly containing chocolate but Kurama decided it would be better not to tell Koenma*
By the time the party started Hiei had eaten all of his chocolate and was extremely hyper. He ran around the room where the party was being held and he poured 100 cups of punch. Then soon Koenma was going to give a speech.
Koenma: I would like to thank you all for coming. I'd like to thank my team for all the battles they did and I just want them to know that at the Dark Tournament I never doubted that they would win.
Ogre: *Whispering in Koenma's ear* You were always doubting they would win.
Koenma: *Hits Ogre in the face and continues with speech* I always knew they would win because they're a strong team that can win any battle, no matter how weak they are, I still believed in them. And since it's my birthday they were so nice, they wanted to make a statue of me.
Yusuke: More liked forced.
Genkai: Stupid Bastard. It took 19 hours straight to finish that damn statue. I'M A FIGHTER, NOT A SCULPTOR!!! DAMN YOU ROTTEN KID!! *Flips Koenma off*
Koenma: Oh, look Genkai's waving to me. Hi Genkai!.
Genkai: *Muttering* Damn kid….
Ogre: There's something I need to tell you. Something about Hiei.
Koenma: Not now Ogre. Can't you see I'm busy? Now, without further ado, I present to you Koenma!
Everybody is staring at the statue which is entirely made out of chocolate but that's not the part they're shocked at, Hiei ripped the Koenma's statue's dick with his teeth and started to eat it. And not only that but there was a giant crater where the face was supposed to be.
Koenma: What is he doing to my statue?
Ogre: Well, Hiei gets hyper when he eats chocolate.
Koenma: You never told me that!
Ogre: I tried to.
*flashback*
Genkai, Botan, Yusuke, Kurama and Kuwabara were working on the statue. Kurama told Koenma that Hiei couldn't participate for personal reasons.
Genkai: I don't know why I have to help make statue for a stupid baby.
Koenma: Because you're part of the team and since in my speech I say that the team made it for me, well, add them together .
Genkai: Stupid brat…Don't people think I suffered enough? Noooooooooooooooo, people have to shove more labor work into me before I die.
Ogre: I need to tell why Hiei can't participate.
Koenma: Can't you see I'm busy here?!
Ogre: But it's important!
Koenma: So, is this! I don't have time to sniff the roses or talk to you! I'm very busy!
Ogre: But I really need to tell you!!
Koenma: What is it of "I'm busy" don't you understand?!! When I say "I'm busy" it means I'm busy! I don't have time to talk!!
Ogre: Yes, sir…
Genkai: *Thinking* I'll get my revenge for him making me do this slave work. *Genkai powers up for an attack and shoots it right in the face making a giant crater in the face* *Out loud* That will teach you what happens when you mess with an old prune like me!!!
Koenma: What?! What happened to my face! My poor statue! Fix it right now!
Botan: We're out of chocolate!
Koenma: Oh, well. I guess some things just can't be fixed.
*End of flashback*
People are basically looking at 2 things. Hiei eating the Koenma statue's dick or the face that looks like a crater.
Ogre: I hate to tell you I told you so, but I did tell you so. But did you listen? Nooooooooooooooo. You were too busy gawking at your statue to be told that when Hiei eats chocolate he gets really hyper and can't stop.
Koenma: Okay, okay. No, need to rub it in…
Yusuke: So, Hiei gets hyper when he eats chocolate?
Kurama: *Nervously* And fertilizer…
Yusuke: What?! You knew?!!!! Why didn't you tell me?!
Kurama: *Nervously* Well, you-you were busy.
Yusuke: Well, I better go stop him. *Yusuke heads over to Hiei who has finished eating the dick and is now climbing on the statue again and trying to pull the pacifier out* Now, it's time to stop Hiei. *Hiei growls at Yusuke and keeps trying to pull the pacifier out* Hiei let's go!! *Pulls on Hiei's arm and Hiei bites Yusuke's hand* OW!!! He bit me!
Kurama: Awwwww….he wants to be your friend.
Yusuke: Ha, ha, very funny. I'd like to see you try.
Kurama: All right. Hiei come here, *singsong* I have chocolate…*Waves candy bar in the air in front of Hiei and Hiei comes over*
Yusuke: Hey! That was a bribe! You cheated!
Kurama: So? I got him to come didn't I? Besides it's only a soy bar.
Yusuke: Yeah, a CHOCOLATE soy bar.
Kurama: Listen all we have to do now is get him home.
Yusuke: I'm not doing it.
Kurama: Well, don't look at me. I'm not doing it.
Yusuke: I gotta take Kayko home, and Kuwabara just left a couple minutes ago with Shizuru and Yukina.
Kurama: What if…? *He walks over to Botan* Botan we have a favor to ask you. Can you take Hiei home?
Botan: Uh…okay. *Botan takes Hiei home and Hiei gets ready for bed and gets in the bed, and falls asleep* Oh, he's so cute when he's asleep…
Hiei: Botan?
Botan: Huh? What is it Hiei?
Hiei: Well, I was wondering…never mind it's a dumb question anyway….
Botan: What? What is it?
Hiei: Well, I was wondering if we could…*quickly* go on a date. But I know what you would say, you would say no because it's embarrassing having a freaky hyper person around you.
Botan: Actually, I think you're cute when you're hyper.
Hiei: Really? So, what about that date?
Botan: I'd love to Hiei. What about tomorrow night at 7:00 P.M.?
Hiei: That sounds great. So, I'll pick you up tomorrow at 7:00.
Botan: Now I gotta get going. *Kisses Hiei on the cheek* Bye, Hiei
The End
~*~
A/N: Well what did you think of it? Pleeeeeease review!
Preview: In my next story Hiei and Botan go on a date and Hiei goes hyper! Will everything turn out in the end? Find out in my next episode!!