It's not a pretend.

This story takes place right after "Till death do us part" (season 4)

It's my first fanfic so please, be gentle, but don't hesitate don't send any comment, advice or remark! I'd be really grateful ! Oh yes also, I'm French so please don't take care of the grammar mistakes.

Disclaimer : I don't own any of these characters… Miss P. and Jarod are the property of TNT and their creators.

Parker's manor. 09.03 pm

Parker enters her house, leaves her keys on the table near the door and takes her jacket away. She then heads to the kitchen and checks on her fridge before grabbing a bottle of whiskey.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."

She turns suddenly when she hears the familiar voice.

"Jarod…"

"Were you expecting someone else?"

Parker rolls eyes and grabs a glass but he places a hand over hers.

"don't Parker."

"Give me a good reason not to kill you right now Jarod."

He smiles with his cutest smile so she looks at him then at the bottle. She then sighs before grabbing some water bottle and filling her glass. Jarod watches her smiling then leaves the room. She turns to say something but sees he's disappeared.

"Jarod!"

She exits the kitchen to find him placing better some plate on the coffee table. She lets fall her glass, really surprised at the sight before us. Jarod has settled two covers on the table, the one facing to the other, nothing romantic, but certainly made with a lot of love and care. She notices the larger plate filled with the meal he got her ready. She stares at it a moment before turning the head to him, wondering, not able to speak.

"I think I owe you some explanations… about Thomas."

"I could call the sweepers… or Lyle or something"

Jarod smiles, goes to stereo and switches it on. The song starting is 'I'm your angel' by Céline Dion (I like her a lot but you can pick the song you want J ) . He feels her shocked look in his back and turns around to find her glare. She hesitantly looks at the stereo then at the table. Both are surprised by the softness in her voice.

"why?"

"Because it's been an exhausting week for you.. and I think you deserve some attention"

He can feel her hesitation before she closes eyes and lets herself sit down on the couch

"why you?"

Jarod sits down at the other side of the table and pours his glass with some wine. He tastes it before smiling.

"perfect wine. 1983."

He pours her glass before his own then serves themselves with the meal he prepared.

"Perfect to accompany this French meal.. has Sydney ever cooked it for you? I remember he taught me how to do it once"

Parker raises her eyebrows, wondering when Sydney could have done a such thing then smiles remembering that Jarod and the doctor have probably met during those past four years. She sighs at the thought.

"What?"

"It's been four years already… "

Jarod smiles slowly then looks around then at her.

"Aren't you fed up of that place? Don't you wanna change?"

"I had to I remind you.. and then The Centre killed him"

Jarod looks up at her realizing what he said and probably hurt her.

"I'm sorry I didn't want to.. "

"don't worry."

Jarod smiles at her soft respond. She eats some and closes eyes, savoring the taste before looking at him.

"It's good"

"I told you!"

Parker smiles softly at his excitement and his boyish behavior. The man before her stares at her in amazement, seeing her smile, which immediately disappear when she gets his look.

"What?"

"Nothing.. it's just been a while I last saw you smiling, that's all."

She looks at him then smiles sweetly and drinks some wine before looking around her.

"I wish I could move out.. but I'm not like you.. I'm not free like the wind.. "

"You think I am?"

She gets his hurt look and regrets immediately what she said.

"I didn't want to say that.. I mean.. somewhere you are… look at you… you could disappear and stop leaving us clues, we'd never find you, you can be sure of this."

She then replays what she just said and opens wide eyes.

"Why did you never leave? I mean totally.. you could have, we'd never find you without your leads and clues"

She sees hesitation in his eyes then he looks around.

"to tell you that I stayed to find clues about my past, about my family, about your family would be saying only the a little part of the truth"

"And what would be the other part"

Jarod looks at her then smiles slowly.

"Because of Sydney. Because he's always been like a father to me"

Parker doesn't look convinced, above all because he unsuccessfully tries to avoid her eyes.

"that's just another part, but it's not the only reason, is it?"

"Let's just talk about something else okay"

She looks a little disappointed then finishes her glass so he serves her again.

"Because you want the Centre down? You want them off the surface of the earth?"

"no… maybe also… "

She looks at him wondering then softly.

"why Jay?"

He looks up at her then smiles sweetly when realizing she used his childhood surname.

"Exactly because of that name.. Jay… because… because I lost a friend, deep in those sublevels and I'm trying hard to bring her back to the surface… But there's always an obstacle on our road, like her father, her past, the Triumvirate… and it's getting worse and worse-"

He's shut by her finger pressed on his lips. He closes eyes then opens them to see her kneeling down by his chair. She leaves her hands on his knees and looks up at him, playing with his pants.

"you don't have to do all this.. that friend was killed long ago, in a lift, in the same time as her mother and you know it.. and she'll never come back"

"yes she will! I'm trying hard.. I almost succeeded with the help of a friend but his death just made things worse… she's put that wall between herself and her real herself… between her heart and her head.. "

Parker looks at his knees then up at him. They stare in eyes a moment then she strokes his cheek slowly.

"But the little girl inside of her is really happy to have a friend like you and to have someone who she loves really much, even if he's dead now."

"Did you tell him?"

She nods slowly, tracing every muscle on his face with her thumb then his eyebrows, looking attentively at them.

"Do you feel better now?"

Her nod answered and her thumb rested on his forehead as her fingers slid in his hair.

"You're so much like Thomas… "

"Park-"

Once again cut by her finger, he closes eyes and sighs silently under her stare.

"the same heart.. the same way to give and never asking in return.. the same kind of life… hitting the road each time it's possible for you… rebuilding everything that falls in your hands… "

"there's only one thing I want to rebuild Parker."

She raises her eyebrows surprised.

"You, the superman of the twentieth century, doesn't want to do everything he's doing? Doesn't want to help all the families he helps? "

"I didn't say that… there's only one thing I've been trying hard to rebuild during years and I never succeeded"

She looks a little hurt for him at his comment.

"Your family."

"yes and… "

She frowns at the 'and' then gets his soft look. They stare in eyes a long moment before she sighs and closes eyes, not wanting to hear the rest of his comment.

"and our relationship"

She stands up hesitantly and goes back to her seat under his hurt look.

"you know you've always been more than just Miss Parker the Ice Queen for me, you know it Parker."

"why did you send Thomas then?"

"Because I wanted you to be happy.. don't say you weren't."

"I didn't say I wasn't… "

There's a pregnant silent in the room as they look at each other awkwardly, eventually broken by her soft voice.

"Thank you Jay…. For making us meet… I never thanked you for that…"

"you thanked me a thousand times by making Thomas and yourself happy and by showing your love and true feelings at the Centre"

She looks at her then closes eyes. He looks down and rubs his hair before noticing tears rolling down her cheeks. He looks worried and goes to sit next to her on the couch. He reveals even more worry and hesitation in voice.

"what happens?"

She shakes her head so he slowly wraps an arm around her shoulders and surprisingly, she accepts it and rests her head onto his chest, wiping away the tears but more come.

"I'm so sorry Jarod"

"what for?"

"Everything I did.. everything I've done to hurt you.. "

"You've never hurt me, nor Sydney, nor Broots.. the Centre has.. your father and Raines… "

"Will you forgive me one day? I can't believe you're being so.. so sweet with me while I'm just… "

He shushes her with a finger on her lips and makes her turn the head gently so their looks meet. His lips parts, about to let words out but are softly closed by hers. He closes eyes and tries to savor the best of this kiss before realizing she's deepening it, wrapping her arms around his neck. All the passion between them is finally released as they wrap their arms around each other. Jarod presses her back against the couch and lays on top of her, never leaving her lips. A soft moan escape her lips as his hands slide down her body to her legs. Her hands grab his hair gently, pressing his lips against hers as her moans get louder. Jarod stands up suddenly woke up by her sounds, his eyes wide then closed, ready to receive a bullet he'll finally never get.

"Jay…"

"I'm.. I'm sorry I shouldn't have.. I'm sorry"

He goes to grab his coat before opening the entrance door. She stands up, grabs her gun and presses it on his chest before he get any chance to leave.

"Where do you think you're going?"

He looks at her scared, his eyes going from her gun to her face and back to her gun.

"Park-"

She for the last time cuts him with her lips pressed against his. He backs off, looking down.

"Don't do this to me.. I would never be able to leave after this."

"who said you had to?"

"They're after me.. your job is to bring me back to them Parker… Victoria… "

She looks up in his eyes when she hears her first name.

"Don't leave me behind again, not like four years ago"

"I can't stay Vicky.. I can't, I'm sorry"

"Just for tonight.. "

He looks at her then holds her hand and gently squeeze it.

"we both know we'd never be able to let it be just tonight… I'd want to see you more and more often and I'd let them take me so you could run away.."

"Oh please Jarod, they'll never let me go, you know it, you're the genius"

"I know… but my heart doesn't.. my heart belongs to you… "

She closes eyes, sighing then rests her head onto his chest as he wraps his comforting arms around her shoulders. Tears escape her eyes when she opens them to look at him.

"What can I do to make you stay?"

"Nothing.. unless you come with me."

"I could never do that.. I've my past.. the truth about mommy to find.. Sydney and Broots.. "

Jarod sighs silently before kissing her forehead.

"We're like Romeo and Juliet"

"Who?"

Parker smiles at him surprised.

"I'm surprised Wonder Boy.. never read Shakespeare?"

"sure.. all these.. King Lear and Hamlet things.. it's too depressing.."

Parker giggles and Jarod smiles innocently

"What could I ever make of you Wonder Boy.."

"a husband, a father.. a happy man"

She stares at him surprised before a smile spreads on her face.

"We have some issues to solve before, Pez Boy"

"and after?"

She looks at him then a shy smile appears on her face.

"you're really thinking about that?"

"it could be a nice thing"

"I mean, it's not like a pretend you can stop after a month.. it's a pretend for the entire life… "

He smiles cutely before capturing her lips with his. She slams the door shut and grabs him to the couch where they lay, their kiss never breaking. Her eyes close and a smile appears on her lips when she hears his last words before she looses herself in his arms.

"it's not a pretend. It's real life."

The End.