Belated disclaimer so I don't get sued: These are Joss Whedon's characters.
Wheee! Also, the last part with quotage and everything is taken from the
1st part of the "Bargaining" episode.
* * *
"Who the hell are you?" Spike yelled.
"Me? I'm your new best friend," she said as she stepped closer. "Let's play 'kill the vampire'. I'll go first."
Spike ran as fast as he could back to the Summers' house.
"Let me in!" he yelled as he banged desperately on the back door. "Bloody, let me in!"
As soon as the door opened, he rushed in.
"What is your problem?" Willow asked.
The amber-haired girl ran in after him.
"Oh."
The girl kicked Spike half across the room.
Willow ran after her. "What are you doing?"
"Fighting evil," she said, not looking at Willow.
"That's not evil!" She yelled. "That's impotent."
"Oh." The girl swallowed. "There's something you should know about your boyfriend…"
"He's not my boyfriend!"
"Whatever you call it, you should know that—"
"He's got a chip in his head! He can't hurt anybody."
"That's a fun delusion…"
"Look!" Willow pointed at Spike, who was crouched in a corner, holding his aching head in pain.
"So I hurt him. That was kind of the plan…"
"He helps us. He helped us stop the apocalypse."
"Wait, you know about the apoca—you knew Buffy!!"
Willow bit her lip. The pain of losing her best friend was still fresh on her mind.
"Umm, yeah. And where do you know her from?"
"I've heard stories…"
"Who are you?"
"I'm Alexia, the new slayer."
Willow practically rolled her eyes out of her head. "They don't waste any time, do they?"
"It's important."
"How long have you been here?"
"A couple of days…I'm not sure."
"And you're the reason for the lack of bad guys…?"
"Figured I'd help out since I have that whole calling/slayer-ability thing going on with me."
"Right. Ok. Well, come back tomorrow. We'll talk. Really."
Willow pushed Alexia out the door.
"Bye now!" Willow said cheerfully as she let the door close in the new slayer's face.
"Umm, bye?" Alexia said to the closed door.
* * *
"Spike, you okay?" Willow asked.
"As soon as I have a couple of gallons of whiskey…" he muttered, still holding his head.
"Sorry," said Willow. "Didn't realize that there was a possibility of you being in danger…"
"It's called the real world, luv. And I don't like that 'slayer'."
"I don't either. Besides, 'slayer' rhymes with 'traitor'."
Before a sound could escape Spike's mouth, Willow elaborated. "I don't mean Buffy," she said. "Buffy was special."
"And we've got robotic proof of that, don't we?"
Willow looked up the stairs and sighed.
"You can stay here tonight, Spike. We'll get this settled tomorrow," Willow said as she made her way towards the stairs.
"My whiskey?"
"I'm underage, dumbass."
Spike kicked the couch. At least that wasn't human. He closed the blinds and waited for sleep to overtake his dead, soulless body.
* * *
"So there's a new slayer?" Giles asked, pulling his glasses away from his face. "It figures that the council wouldn't bother to tell me…"
"I will have a new friend!" Buffy-bot said with a big grin.
"Yeah," said Willow, shaking her head. "So how exactly do we deal with this?"
"Well," Giles said. "This is good. We have a slayer, which makes Sunnydale a lot safer for all of us…"
Spike grunted loudly.
"Almost all of us, then," Giles corrected himself with an exasperated sigh.
"I don't like her." Spike said. "She tries to kill everything with fangs and pointy horns. Hell, she'd kill you if you were still a goddamn feoral demon!"
"I see your point," Giles said, "But that IS what a slayer is supposed to do."
"A bloody brainless slayer."
"Like me!" exclaimed Buffy-bot.
Spike snickered. "Even the Buffy-bot's got more brains than her!"
Giles shook his head and tried to steer the conversation back towards an actual point.
"We need to find her and talk to her."
"Well I told her to come back today," Willow said. "I might've scared her a bit, but considering that she's a slayer, I figure she's not hiding out under her bed."
"Wonderful."
Buffy-bot flashed a big shiny grin.
* * *
Alexia hadn't gotten the best impression from Buffy's supposed former friends, but she knew she had to go see them. Her sacred duty unfortunately required talking to annoying people or things for important information…
She sighed and made her way to the house where she had almost slayed a vampire the night before. So far, everyone she'd met in Sunnydale was proving her theory that people were stupid.
She knocked a couple of times on the door and waited for someone to show up, tapping her nails against the railing.
The red-haired girl from the night before opened the door.
"Oh, come in!" She said. "I'm sorry about last night, we've had a seriously bad track record with slayers who aren't Buffy."
"I know about Faith," Alexia said.
"Oh. Well you can sit down, and I'm gonna go call Giles so we can talk to you."
"Umm, the place where I came from didn't seem too fond of Giles…"
"Well you can just make your own decision about whether you like him or not, k?"
"Ok," said Alexia tentatively. She wasn't used to making her own decisions. Her watcher had so much to teach her that she really didn't have time for questions. And honestly, she didn't want to know about much. If there was a kill, she was up for it. She saved people's lives and she got to kick some serious ass.
The red-haired girl came back into the room and sat across from Alexia on the coffee table.
"My name's Willow," she said. "I'm nicer than you probably think currently. Really."
"Well, you can't be evil, or else I'd kill you. So you're nice enough for me."
There was a weird silence as they waited for Giles to arrive, not knowing what to say to each other, but luckily Willow's mind was working.
"What's it like where you're from?" She asked.
"I'm not really from anywhere," she said. "I travel, I find evil, and I kill it. My watcher tells me what I need to know, and I move on."
"Where is your watcher?"
Alexia took a small black compact out of her pocket.
Willow was visibly confused.
"It's a cell phone," she said, opening it up. "He's the only one with the number."
"Yep, you gotta watch out for those evil tele-marketers!" Willow quipped.
"Right…"
"So, do you want anything? We have water and other consumables…"
"That's alright," Alexia lightly refused. "I think I'll be alright till umm…"
"Giles."
"Right, Giles gets here. I'm thinking we're safe for now."
"Right."
More unbearable silence. Willow was not loving this, and as soon as she heard a knock on the door, she practically ran to greet Giles.
"Giles," she said as she led him to the living room, "This is Alexia."
"Pleasure." Giles said as he held out his hand.
"We'll see about that," said Alexia as she shook it.
"So what brings you here to Sunnydale?" asked Giles as he took a seat on the couch.
"Well, it's on the hellmouth. I think that's reason enough. I like killing bad things. I'm an evil-thing-killer."
"I'm sure Spike can verify that," Giles said as he wiped his glasses with a handkerchief.
"I think I'm sorry about that…"
"Oh, don't worry. There's a lot of times we wouldn't mind. I don't know why he helps us, but he can be quite vital in the process sometimes…"
Alexia smiled politely and pretended she understood.
"Anyway," Giles continued. "Would you like to train with me?"
Alexia took out her cell phone. "I've got a watcher, but thanks."
Giles nodded. "Ah, yes. Well I suppose then that you can patrol for now and let us know if you find anything out of the ordinary…"
"I work by myself, and I have a watcher already, so enjoy your retirement days. Look, it's been really great meeting you all, but I've been just fine here, and honestly I don't need any of your help."
Alexia got up and walked out in a hurry.
"I suppose that went well," Giles said, unsure whether he believed that.
"I hate slayers who aren't Buffy…" Willow muttered.
* * *
"What's the what?" Xander asked.
All the scoobies were again at the table in the magic shop for another meeting. Well, all but one.
"And where is Giles?" Anya asked. "His punctuality is descending. And his head is getting balder…"
"Anya!" Willow said. "Giles isn't here because he isn't coming. And I don't want him to know about this, okay?"
Everyone was silent. Even Anya.
"I called this meeting because things haven't been good. Ever since Buffy died, the order of the world has shifted. I think we all need her, especially Dawn. But forgetting about our troubles, Buffy is most likely in some sort of hell dimension. And if we leave her in that after she sacrificed herself to save the world…"
Willow looked down, trying to will her tears away. Tara got up from her seat and wrapped her arms around Willow from behind.
"There's a spell we can do," Willow said, just barely keeping herself together. "We can get her out of hell, and we can give Dawn what she truly needs…we could bring Buffy back."
* * *
Spike and Dawn were sitting on the couch in the living room as Dawn finished up the last bit of pizza.
"So what do you fancy, bit?" Spike asked. "Game a rummy?"
"Willow and Tara said they'd be back early. You don't really have to hang. I mean, if you're bored."
"I'm not," Spike said as he got up from the couch and made his way to the wooden chest. "And yeah, I do."
"But I'm fine alone. It's not like anyone's coming after me. I'm not
the key - or if I am, I don't open anything anymore. It's over, remember?"
"I'm not going to leave you here by yourself." Spike said, bringing the cards over to the coffee table. "So forget it."
"I'm just saying-"
Spike slammed the stack of cards on the table mush harder than he meant to.
"No! I'm not leaving you to get hurt. Not again."
Dawn was silent for a bit as she realized what Spike was saying. Times like these made her feel like people really cared for her. People who were really alive…well, sort of.
"Now deal."
* * *
"Who the hell are you?" Spike yelled.
"Me? I'm your new best friend," she said as she stepped closer. "Let's play 'kill the vampire'. I'll go first."
Spike ran as fast as he could back to the Summers' house.
"Let me in!" he yelled as he banged desperately on the back door. "Bloody, let me in!"
As soon as the door opened, he rushed in.
"What is your problem?" Willow asked.
The amber-haired girl ran in after him.
"Oh."
The girl kicked Spike half across the room.
Willow ran after her. "What are you doing?"
"Fighting evil," she said, not looking at Willow.
"That's not evil!" She yelled. "That's impotent."
"Oh." The girl swallowed. "There's something you should know about your boyfriend…"
"He's not my boyfriend!"
"Whatever you call it, you should know that—"
"He's got a chip in his head! He can't hurt anybody."
"That's a fun delusion…"
"Look!" Willow pointed at Spike, who was crouched in a corner, holding his aching head in pain.
"So I hurt him. That was kind of the plan…"
"He helps us. He helped us stop the apocalypse."
"Wait, you know about the apoca—you knew Buffy!!"
Willow bit her lip. The pain of losing her best friend was still fresh on her mind.
"Umm, yeah. And where do you know her from?"
"I've heard stories…"
"Who are you?"
"I'm Alexia, the new slayer."
Willow practically rolled her eyes out of her head. "They don't waste any time, do they?"
"It's important."
"How long have you been here?"
"A couple of days…I'm not sure."
"And you're the reason for the lack of bad guys…?"
"Figured I'd help out since I have that whole calling/slayer-ability thing going on with me."
"Right. Ok. Well, come back tomorrow. We'll talk. Really."
Willow pushed Alexia out the door.
"Bye now!" Willow said cheerfully as she let the door close in the new slayer's face.
"Umm, bye?" Alexia said to the closed door.
* * *
"Spike, you okay?" Willow asked.
"As soon as I have a couple of gallons of whiskey…" he muttered, still holding his head.
"Sorry," said Willow. "Didn't realize that there was a possibility of you being in danger…"
"It's called the real world, luv. And I don't like that 'slayer'."
"I don't either. Besides, 'slayer' rhymes with 'traitor'."
Before a sound could escape Spike's mouth, Willow elaborated. "I don't mean Buffy," she said. "Buffy was special."
"And we've got robotic proof of that, don't we?"
Willow looked up the stairs and sighed.
"You can stay here tonight, Spike. We'll get this settled tomorrow," Willow said as she made her way towards the stairs.
"My whiskey?"
"I'm underage, dumbass."
Spike kicked the couch. At least that wasn't human. He closed the blinds and waited for sleep to overtake his dead, soulless body.
* * *
"So there's a new slayer?" Giles asked, pulling his glasses away from his face. "It figures that the council wouldn't bother to tell me…"
"I will have a new friend!" Buffy-bot said with a big grin.
"Yeah," said Willow, shaking her head. "So how exactly do we deal with this?"
"Well," Giles said. "This is good. We have a slayer, which makes Sunnydale a lot safer for all of us…"
Spike grunted loudly.
"Almost all of us, then," Giles corrected himself with an exasperated sigh.
"I don't like her." Spike said. "She tries to kill everything with fangs and pointy horns. Hell, she'd kill you if you were still a goddamn feoral demon!"
"I see your point," Giles said, "But that IS what a slayer is supposed to do."
"A bloody brainless slayer."
"Like me!" exclaimed Buffy-bot.
Spike snickered. "Even the Buffy-bot's got more brains than her!"
Giles shook his head and tried to steer the conversation back towards an actual point.
"We need to find her and talk to her."
"Well I told her to come back today," Willow said. "I might've scared her a bit, but considering that she's a slayer, I figure she's not hiding out under her bed."
"Wonderful."
Buffy-bot flashed a big shiny grin.
* * *
Alexia hadn't gotten the best impression from Buffy's supposed former friends, but she knew she had to go see them. Her sacred duty unfortunately required talking to annoying people or things for important information…
She sighed and made her way to the house where she had almost slayed a vampire the night before. So far, everyone she'd met in Sunnydale was proving her theory that people were stupid.
She knocked a couple of times on the door and waited for someone to show up, tapping her nails against the railing.
The red-haired girl from the night before opened the door.
"Oh, come in!" She said. "I'm sorry about last night, we've had a seriously bad track record with slayers who aren't Buffy."
"I know about Faith," Alexia said.
"Oh. Well you can sit down, and I'm gonna go call Giles so we can talk to you."
"Umm, the place where I came from didn't seem too fond of Giles…"
"Well you can just make your own decision about whether you like him or not, k?"
"Ok," said Alexia tentatively. She wasn't used to making her own decisions. Her watcher had so much to teach her that she really didn't have time for questions. And honestly, she didn't want to know about much. If there was a kill, she was up for it. She saved people's lives and she got to kick some serious ass.
The red-haired girl came back into the room and sat across from Alexia on the coffee table.
"My name's Willow," she said. "I'm nicer than you probably think currently. Really."
"Well, you can't be evil, or else I'd kill you. So you're nice enough for me."
There was a weird silence as they waited for Giles to arrive, not knowing what to say to each other, but luckily Willow's mind was working.
"What's it like where you're from?" She asked.
"I'm not really from anywhere," she said. "I travel, I find evil, and I kill it. My watcher tells me what I need to know, and I move on."
"Where is your watcher?"
Alexia took a small black compact out of her pocket.
Willow was visibly confused.
"It's a cell phone," she said, opening it up. "He's the only one with the number."
"Yep, you gotta watch out for those evil tele-marketers!" Willow quipped.
"Right…"
"So, do you want anything? We have water and other consumables…"
"That's alright," Alexia lightly refused. "I think I'll be alright till umm…"
"Giles."
"Right, Giles gets here. I'm thinking we're safe for now."
"Right."
More unbearable silence. Willow was not loving this, and as soon as she heard a knock on the door, she practically ran to greet Giles.
"Giles," she said as she led him to the living room, "This is Alexia."
"Pleasure." Giles said as he held out his hand.
"We'll see about that," said Alexia as she shook it.
"So what brings you here to Sunnydale?" asked Giles as he took a seat on the couch.
"Well, it's on the hellmouth. I think that's reason enough. I like killing bad things. I'm an evil-thing-killer."
"I'm sure Spike can verify that," Giles said as he wiped his glasses with a handkerchief.
"I think I'm sorry about that…"
"Oh, don't worry. There's a lot of times we wouldn't mind. I don't know why he helps us, but he can be quite vital in the process sometimes…"
Alexia smiled politely and pretended she understood.
"Anyway," Giles continued. "Would you like to train with me?"
Alexia took out her cell phone. "I've got a watcher, but thanks."
Giles nodded. "Ah, yes. Well I suppose then that you can patrol for now and let us know if you find anything out of the ordinary…"
"I work by myself, and I have a watcher already, so enjoy your retirement days. Look, it's been really great meeting you all, but I've been just fine here, and honestly I don't need any of your help."
Alexia got up and walked out in a hurry.
"I suppose that went well," Giles said, unsure whether he believed that.
"I hate slayers who aren't Buffy…" Willow muttered.
* * *
"What's the what?" Xander asked.
All the scoobies were again at the table in the magic shop for another meeting. Well, all but one.
"And where is Giles?" Anya asked. "His punctuality is descending. And his head is getting balder…"
"Anya!" Willow said. "Giles isn't here because he isn't coming. And I don't want him to know about this, okay?"
Everyone was silent. Even Anya.
"I called this meeting because things haven't been good. Ever since Buffy died, the order of the world has shifted. I think we all need her, especially Dawn. But forgetting about our troubles, Buffy is most likely in some sort of hell dimension. And if we leave her in that after she sacrificed herself to save the world…"
Willow looked down, trying to will her tears away. Tara got up from her seat and wrapped her arms around Willow from behind.
"There's a spell we can do," Willow said, just barely keeping herself together. "We can get her out of hell, and we can give Dawn what she truly needs…we could bring Buffy back."
* * *
Spike and Dawn were sitting on the couch in the living room as Dawn finished up the last bit of pizza.
"So what do you fancy, bit?" Spike asked. "Game a rummy?"
"Willow and Tara said they'd be back early. You don't really have to hang. I mean, if you're bored."
"I'm not," Spike said as he got up from the couch and made his way to the wooden chest. "And yeah, I do."
"But I'm fine alone. It's not like anyone's coming after me. I'm not
the key - or if I am, I don't open anything anymore. It's over, remember?"
"I'm not going to leave you here by yourself." Spike said, bringing the cards over to the coffee table. "So forget it."
"I'm just saying-"
Spike slammed the stack of cards on the table mush harder than he meant to.
"No! I'm not leaving you to get hurt. Not again."
Dawn was silent for a bit as she realized what Spike was saying. Times like these made her feel like people really cared for her. People who were really alive…well, sort of.
"Now deal."