Disclaimer: Aren't mine...sadly. Wish they(at least two of them) were, cause they'd be a lot happier!

Arching: Sure! Especially for any other Spike/Cordelia sites, I'm all for allowing them use age of this story. Enjoy!

Author: Leather Tuscadero

Title:Illusions

Pairings: Spike/Cordelia

Summary:Spike leaves behind his life in Sunnydale, also moving on from Buffy and starts working with Angel's crew. And, he discovers that he and Cordelia Chase, of all people have something in common.

Feedback:Please!!! Reply to the group ok?

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Life sucked.

So did unlife. Especially his.

He did it all for her, and for what? Did the silly bint appreciate it? No. He'd seen her...kissing Angel...Oooh big surprise there Spikey boy. He sighed to himself. But it wasn't Angel's fault.

It was his.

He knew better than to let his hopes for a relationship with her get to high. And they'd come crashing down on his head.

Just his luck.

Now he was standing by his sire, looking around the hotel Angel called "Hyperion".

"We're home, Spike." Angel walks into the hotel, while Spike trails behind him.

Home?

Got to be somewhere. The blonde English vampire supposed. Spike followed Angel into the hotel, seeing Wesley the British Watcher who looked quiet different from what he expected. Spike had expected another stiff walking Giles. Though, Giles had surprised him hadn't he? He wasn't so stiff anymore.

"Angel, you're back." Said a voice from the stairs. She walked down, catching his attention. She smiled, but it was slow, rusty. The sort of smile that snuck up on you. Cordelia Chase caught Spike's attention. Was this the same loud mouthed, air headed secretary he'd met a while back?

Things change.

Oh, how they change

~*~*~*~

She was back. She hated the fact that things had changed, so much. Most of it had been her fault, she had allowed herself to become victim to some ancient evil that worked to destroy her. And it had almost won. Nothing was the same now. Not any of her friends....they all had jobs at Wolfram and Hart of all places now.

And Angel had gave Connor up.

That's what hurt the most, though she understood his reasoning. He wanted to give him a better life, the sort Angel hadn't been able to provide. Cordelia's dreams of being a family for Connor had went up in smoke. She had the demon's memories, the demon that had seduced Connor. Lucid Cordelia had been in love with Angel.

Was there love there now? She wasn't sure. Sometimes, she caught him staring at her with that soft look on his face, or their hands brushed...but the big warm feeling that wrapped itself around her like a blanket was no longer there. The I have to see Angel Ever Moment feeling was gone too.

It hurt.

She hated change. Drastic change, anyways. But that's what her life had been about, hadn't it? She was once the Queen of Sunnydale High, her family got bankrupt, so Cordelia had decided to go to Los Angeles to start her own career. She had become a vision girl for Angel....fell in love with him....

And it all spiraled out of control. She heard the door to the Hyperion open. She had been talking to Lorne in the hallway. At least one of her friends still cared about her.

When she looked, Angel was back and her heart fluttered. There would never be any hope though. Hope was dead. She smiled shyly. "Angel, you're back."

And then she noticed the pale haired companion he'd brought with him.

~*~*~*

They found themselves to becoming friends. They were a lot alike, actually. Both had lives changed drastically. Spike had told her why he'd gotten a soul--for Buffy, who could never love him. And she told him why she had stayed--for Angel, whom she could never love...

"So." Spike said as he paced Cordelia's room in the Hyperion. She was really thinking of moving out, getting her own place again. Maybe move back in with Phantom Denis. If she asked him to, he'd hold the house for her. Scare away any potential customers.

"So?" Cordelia looked up at him. "It's beautiful." She handed Spike back the book of poetry he'd let her read. He looked at her oddly.

"You think so?"

"I do."
Spike nodded, as though he wasn't sure what to say. "I loved her, you know." He began, pacing still. "Gave her what I could...and that was me. Wasn't good enough for her, so..."

"Don't do this Spike." Cordelia lay a hand on his shoulder. "Buffy's nothing but a whiny bitch. She always has been." She told him. "Her problem is, she's got everyone convinced she's so god damned wonderful...gag me much?" Cordelia asked with that Queen C spark in her eyes. Spike chuckled a moment and turned to face Cordelia, realizing they were only inches from each other.

Her breath held. He'd never do it, not in a million years. Not when her heart still belonged to Angel, as his did to Buffy's.

But...

What if he did? What if he kissed her?

Things couldn't get any more stranger than they already were, right? Right. She closed her eyes, waiting. For a moment, Spike looked confused, finding his hand brushing back some of her dark hair. It was beginning to grow long again. He'd told her it was pretty long, and she'd kept it long...for him.

He'd told Buffy once he loved her hair, and she had cut it. Weird how things turned, wasn't it? He had lived in illusions, hoping the Slayer could love him the way he loved her. And here was a woman, who was in his dilemma now. Spike watched as Cordelia closed her eyes. She kept hanging on to the possible hope that there could be something between her and Angel...but there wouldn't be. Not anymore.

Spike sighed a moment. Illusions...that's all it was really. He needed to move on, wash his hands clean of his former life. He leaned forward, and found himself placing his lips on hers, deepened the kiss by slipping in a small amount of tongue. Placing a hand on her hip and pulling her forward. Heard her silent gasp, watched as her arms wrapped around his.

Hopefully, this is where the Illusions ended.

The End.