Jess' days in the castle went surprisingly quickly, once Poppy and Severus
both agreed to let her leave the safety of the hospital wing and take an
apartment of her own. There was quite a suitable one in the east wing,
complete with a second bedroom, kitchenette, and loo. There was also the
sitting room and a second annex off of it that had serious playroom
potential. The entire thing was carpeted, making it ideal for a young boy
just learning to use his feet, and there was plenty of room to grow.
It wasn't long before, whether she wanted to admit it or not, the castle started to feel like home. Minerva and Albus took on the role of Nana and Poppa, and spent so much time with Lucas that he began to recognize them by their voices alone. Whenever Jess would walk past the Transfiguration classroom with him and he heard Minerva lecturing he would bounce and laugh and cause such a disturbance that Jess had to start taking an alternate route to the Great Hall to avoid disturbing the class.
Even Severus had taken an interest in the boy, though he'd never admit it, even to Albus. But Jess started to notice that every time she would go to pick Lucas up from his play date with the Headmaster Severus would have found some excuse to have spent the entire time that Lucas was there visiting Albus as well. Lucas even started to develop a bit of a sneer, which caused Jess to want to take the corners of his mouth and stretch them out to a huge smile whenever she saw it.
In fact, while she had hoped that Lucas would develop a strong attachment to Albus or even Flitwick rather than Snape, it seemed as though Severus was the one that Lucas got the most excited to see. At meals the boy insisted on being seated directly between Snape and Jess, which caused a bit of a problem seeing as how Jess' "assigned" seat was at the end of the table. Minerva had been quite willing to give up her seat next to Severus, however, seeming to know something that neither of them was aware of.
By Halloween it seemed hard to believe that the duo had only been in the castle a month. The way Lucas adored Severus, if one didn't know better he would have thought that Severus was the boy's true father. Of course, the shock of blonde hair on the boy's head and his icy green eyes told otherwise, but the strange attachment was still there.
That's why, on Halloween evening, Lucas was none to happy to be taken away by Minerva and Albus to attend the ball while Jess spent a quiet evening in her room. Never mind that Severus had shown up to present the boy with a costume. Jess had hoped that he would leave as soon as Lucas was gone. Hell, he could even take Lucas to the ball, Jess didn't care, as long as he left her alone.
The two were getting along slightly better as long as Severus didn't press her too hard on the issue of teaching. They chatted amiably enough while Jess changed Lucas and dressed him in his new costume. When it was all put together, Jess had to admit to herself, it was a rather adorable costume. It was a deep green velvet robe, and when the hood was pulled up it was sewn to look like the head of a dragon. Lucas didn't care much for the hood, and every time Jess would flip it up he would cry and toss it back down, but it was still sweet to see him all dressed up. His first Halloween had been a bit of a bust. David and Jess had had a fight and David had ended up not allowing Jess to take Lucas to her mother's to see his costume. The next week Jess' mother had died due to complications with a recent horseback riding accident and Jess had never really forgiven David for not letting her go to see her one last time.
After Albus and Minerva had taken away one very upset little boy (he had obviously been looking forward to a Halloween with his newest friend) Jess had told Severus all about Lucas' first Halloween.
Severus obviously wasn't planning on going anywhere, much to Jess' dismay, and so to be a good hostess she offered him a glass of Chianti when she poured herself one. He had accepted and sat on her loveseat, which was the only furniture that sat directly in front of her fireplace, and which also happened to be her favorite seat.
She felt a bit irritated that he had taken her spot, and she realized that there was room for her on the loveseat, but she'd be damned if she was bout to let Severus bully her into sitting next to him. She chose to sit on one of the chairs to the side of the fireplace and forego the comfortable heat that one got from sitting closer to it.
"Well, I don't know what you expect me to say other than I warned you."
"I don't expect you to say anything. I was just telling you the story. Fuck's sake."
"Well you expected me to say something or you wouldn't have told me the story. Honestly, Jess, I can tell you he was a nasty bastard until I'm blue in the face, but how many times to I have to say it before you'll believe me?" Severus kept his face trained on the fire and took a sip of Chianti when he had finished.
Jess was speechless. Had he known all along that every time he called David some derogatory name he caused her heart to flutter? Had he known that every time she disagreed with him what she really longed to say was that she agreed wholeheartedly? She had no idea what to say in this situation, so she polished off the last of her glass and asked, "More to drink?"
Severus didn't answer in either the affirmative or the negative, but simply held his glass out at arms length. She crossed the great expanse between them in three steps and took his glass, filled it, and returned it to him. She then returned to her chair and drained about half her glass. For some reason she was feeling uncomfortable and irritable. As if Severus had something that he desperately wanted to say to her but couldn't find the words. Or couldn't swallow his pride.
Anxiety getting the best of her, Jess stood and wandered about the room aimlessly, coming to rest directly in front of the mantel and leaning on it heavily, staring into the fire and fidgeting with her fingers, chewing her nails, doing anything she could to take her mind off the tension between herself and her former potions master who was quickly becoming a current crush. "Would you sit down and relax, please," came his silky voice from behind her. "You're making me nervous."
"Well I'm nervous myself." Jess answered curtly and while her words and tone were designed to push him away she found herself hoping he wouldn't withdraw. She wished desperately that she could just come right out and say what she was feeling. But even she wasn't sure exactly what that was, and she certainly couldn't find words for it. Besides conflicted.
"What could you possibly have to be nervous about? And after a glass and a half of Chianti? It must be something extremely worrisome."
"I'm just - nervous. About Luke. I think maybe I should go and get him from the ball. What if he's tired? Or hungry? He's really too young to be spending the evening away from me."
"I'm sure Minerva and Albus are quite capable of seeing to his needs. And I'm sure as well that he's having a grand time. And I'm also sure that that's not all you're anxious about."
"You're right. It's not. It's not at all. I'm also anxious that they might run out of nappies, or that me might catch a chill. That robe was awfully thin, you know, and it is chilly in the Great Hall -"
It was then that she felt it. The surprisingly warm fingers of her former potions master and head of house were drawing her hair from in front of her shoulder to join the rest of it behind her neck. She flinched and spun round quickly, dropping her glass on the carpet with a thick thud. Her eyes were wide and her pupils dilated, and the fear that she was about to be struck was evident in her face.
Severus' face was mere inches from hers, and his eyes studied her in her entirety. She could feel his breath on her neck and flinched again as he rose one hand to place his glass on the mantle. Gods his skin looked soft from this close up, and his eyes made two chocolate pools that danced and flickered with the fire.
"You're not anxious about nappies either."
Jess' breathing was quickening mightily, and she refused to look him in the eye, choosing instead to look past him to the window that overlooked the lake.
"Jess, he wasn't good enough for you." He went to place one hand on her cheek and she flinched again, closing her eyes and turning her head away as an automatic response. Severus persisted, though, and with the most gentility she had ever seen from him he brushed a few stray wisps of hair away from her cheek. The sensation of his skin on hers sent a shiver down her spine and she couldn't help but exhale heavily. This wasn't fair. He shouldn't be allowed to have such a profound effect on her.
"Just look what he's done to you. A woman like you -" he seemed suddenly shy and lost for words. "A woman like you deserves to be treated properly. He did you wrong, Jess, and if I'd have had my chance I would have given him exactly what he deserved." Severus' lips were drawing closer and the closer they drew the more Jess could feel some unnamable fear rising up in her chest.
She felt like a claustrophobic trapped in a closet. She desperately wanted out. With one deft movement she slid underneath his arm and retreated to the shadows, refilling his glass with Chianti and downing the whole thing in one long swig. Then she poured another and took a quick swig before turning to see Severus putting on his cloak and heading for the door.
"I'm sorry, Jess. It was the Chianti. Always goes to my head." Severus refused to look at her, looking instead at the floor. Just before he ducked out the door he turned and faced her for one brief second. "Forgive me for my forwardness." Then he ducked out, leaving her to contemplate the strange events of the evening.
It wasn't long before, whether she wanted to admit it or not, the castle started to feel like home. Minerva and Albus took on the role of Nana and Poppa, and spent so much time with Lucas that he began to recognize them by their voices alone. Whenever Jess would walk past the Transfiguration classroom with him and he heard Minerva lecturing he would bounce and laugh and cause such a disturbance that Jess had to start taking an alternate route to the Great Hall to avoid disturbing the class.
Even Severus had taken an interest in the boy, though he'd never admit it, even to Albus. But Jess started to notice that every time she would go to pick Lucas up from his play date with the Headmaster Severus would have found some excuse to have spent the entire time that Lucas was there visiting Albus as well. Lucas even started to develop a bit of a sneer, which caused Jess to want to take the corners of his mouth and stretch them out to a huge smile whenever she saw it.
In fact, while she had hoped that Lucas would develop a strong attachment to Albus or even Flitwick rather than Snape, it seemed as though Severus was the one that Lucas got the most excited to see. At meals the boy insisted on being seated directly between Snape and Jess, which caused a bit of a problem seeing as how Jess' "assigned" seat was at the end of the table. Minerva had been quite willing to give up her seat next to Severus, however, seeming to know something that neither of them was aware of.
By Halloween it seemed hard to believe that the duo had only been in the castle a month. The way Lucas adored Severus, if one didn't know better he would have thought that Severus was the boy's true father. Of course, the shock of blonde hair on the boy's head and his icy green eyes told otherwise, but the strange attachment was still there.
That's why, on Halloween evening, Lucas was none to happy to be taken away by Minerva and Albus to attend the ball while Jess spent a quiet evening in her room. Never mind that Severus had shown up to present the boy with a costume. Jess had hoped that he would leave as soon as Lucas was gone. Hell, he could even take Lucas to the ball, Jess didn't care, as long as he left her alone.
The two were getting along slightly better as long as Severus didn't press her too hard on the issue of teaching. They chatted amiably enough while Jess changed Lucas and dressed him in his new costume. When it was all put together, Jess had to admit to herself, it was a rather adorable costume. It was a deep green velvet robe, and when the hood was pulled up it was sewn to look like the head of a dragon. Lucas didn't care much for the hood, and every time Jess would flip it up he would cry and toss it back down, but it was still sweet to see him all dressed up. His first Halloween had been a bit of a bust. David and Jess had had a fight and David had ended up not allowing Jess to take Lucas to her mother's to see his costume. The next week Jess' mother had died due to complications with a recent horseback riding accident and Jess had never really forgiven David for not letting her go to see her one last time.
After Albus and Minerva had taken away one very upset little boy (he had obviously been looking forward to a Halloween with his newest friend) Jess had told Severus all about Lucas' first Halloween.
Severus obviously wasn't planning on going anywhere, much to Jess' dismay, and so to be a good hostess she offered him a glass of Chianti when she poured herself one. He had accepted and sat on her loveseat, which was the only furniture that sat directly in front of her fireplace, and which also happened to be her favorite seat.
She felt a bit irritated that he had taken her spot, and she realized that there was room for her on the loveseat, but she'd be damned if she was bout to let Severus bully her into sitting next to him. She chose to sit on one of the chairs to the side of the fireplace and forego the comfortable heat that one got from sitting closer to it.
"Well, I don't know what you expect me to say other than I warned you."
"I don't expect you to say anything. I was just telling you the story. Fuck's sake."
"Well you expected me to say something or you wouldn't have told me the story. Honestly, Jess, I can tell you he was a nasty bastard until I'm blue in the face, but how many times to I have to say it before you'll believe me?" Severus kept his face trained on the fire and took a sip of Chianti when he had finished.
Jess was speechless. Had he known all along that every time he called David some derogatory name he caused her heart to flutter? Had he known that every time she disagreed with him what she really longed to say was that she agreed wholeheartedly? She had no idea what to say in this situation, so she polished off the last of her glass and asked, "More to drink?"
Severus didn't answer in either the affirmative or the negative, but simply held his glass out at arms length. She crossed the great expanse between them in three steps and took his glass, filled it, and returned it to him. She then returned to her chair and drained about half her glass. For some reason she was feeling uncomfortable and irritable. As if Severus had something that he desperately wanted to say to her but couldn't find the words. Or couldn't swallow his pride.
Anxiety getting the best of her, Jess stood and wandered about the room aimlessly, coming to rest directly in front of the mantel and leaning on it heavily, staring into the fire and fidgeting with her fingers, chewing her nails, doing anything she could to take her mind off the tension between herself and her former potions master who was quickly becoming a current crush. "Would you sit down and relax, please," came his silky voice from behind her. "You're making me nervous."
"Well I'm nervous myself." Jess answered curtly and while her words and tone were designed to push him away she found herself hoping he wouldn't withdraw. She wished desperately that she could just come right out and say what she was feeling. But even she wasn't sure exactly what that was, and she certainly couldn't find words for it. Besides conflicted.
"What could you possibly have to be nervous about? And after a glass and a half of Chianti? It must be something extremely worrisome."
"I'm just - nervous. About Luke. I think maybe I should go and get him from the ball. What if he's tired? Or hungry? He's really too young to be spending the evening away from me."
"I'm sure Minerva and Albus are quite capable of seeing to his needs. And I'm sure as well that he's having a grand time. And I'm also sure that that's not all you're anxious about."
"You're right. It's not. It's not at all. I'm also anxious that they might run out of nappies, or that me might catch a chill. That robe was awfully thin, you know, and it is chilly in the Great Hall -"
It was then that she felt it. The surprisingly warm fingers of her former potions master and head of house were drawing her hair from in front of her shoulder to join the rest of it behind her neck. She flinched and spun round quickly, dropping her glass on the carpet with a thick thud. Her eyes were wide and her pupils dilated, and the fear that she was about to be struck was evident in her face.
Severus' face was mere inches from hers, and his eyes studied her in her entirety. She could feel his breath on her neck and flinched again as he rose one hand to place his glass on the mantle. Gods his skin looked soft from this close up, and his eyes made two chocolate pools that danced and flickered with the fire.
"You're not anxious about nappies either."
Jess' breathing was quickening mightily, and she refused to look him in the eye, choosing instead to look past him to the window that overlooked the lake.
"Jess, he wasn't good enough for you." He went to place one hand on her cheek and she flinched again, closing her eyes and turning her head away as an automatic response. Severus persisted, though, and with the most gentility she had ever seen from him he brushed a few stray wisps of hair away from her cheek. The sensation of his skin on hers sent a shiver down her spine and she couldn't help but exhale heavily. This wasn't fair. He shouldn't be allowed to have such a profound effect on her.
"Just look what he's done to you. A woman like you -" he seemed suddenly shy and lost for words. "A woman like you deserves to be treated properly. He did you wrong, Jess, and if I'd have had my chance I would have given him exactly what he deserved." Severus' lips were drawing closer and the closer they drew the more Jess could feel some unnamable fear rising up in her chest.
She felt like a claustrophobic trapped in a closet. She desperately wanted out. With one deft movement she slid underneath his arm and retreated to the shadows, refilling his glass with Chianti and downing the whole thing in one long swig. Then she poured another and took a quick swig before turning to see Severus putting on his cloak and heading for the door.
"I'm sorry, Jess. It was the Chianti. Always goes to my head." Severus refused to look at her, looking instead at the floor. Just before he ducked out the door he turned and faced her for one brief second. "Forgive me for my forwardness." Then he ducked out, leaving her to contemplate the strange events of the evening.