Disclaimer: Ya. I am a poor idiot that owns nothing related to Zelda. And
this story's content that has to do with Zelda is also related to Zelda.
(Mysterious Voice: Of course) So I do not own that part either. Pretty
much all I own is my Zelda games, This computer, And my brain. (Mysterious
Voice: Which is very, very, small). So this is Nintendo's world and
characters.
Link The Pimp: (Chapter Name By: lemont111)
Mysterious Voice: Hey! Wazzup? The characters are so crazy I think I am now crazy too! So let the Mysterious Voice *Music plays* tell you this messed up story. We last left Link *Cricket chirps* at a party drinking beer!
Translate this!: (who know I could speak Spanish?) ¡Esto será un disclimer en el español! ¡Apenas tan usted sabe que yo no puedo hablar el español tan si usted me corrige! ¡Bueno aquí! ¡Yo no poseo Zelda! ¡Allí yo lo dije! sí, sé que esto es un segundo disclimer! ¡Si usted me odia que entonces muero! Las llamas se comerán con mi sopa. ¡Y sí cambié mi nombre a la Voz Misteriosa! ¡Bye! (ya I know I translated back to English and it came out like this: This will be a disclimer in the Spaniard! Barely so you know that I cannot speak the Spaniard so if you corrects me! Good here! I do not possess Zelda! There I said it! yes, I know that this is a second one disclimer! If you hates me that then I dwell! The flames will be eaten with my soup. And yes I changed my name to the Mysterious Voice! Bye!
Link: This is the best party ever! He said as he was getting it on with Saria.
Saria: I love you Link!
Link: I am only doing this because you asked me too.
*****LATER*****
Mysterious Voice: The party has now ended. Which is a bummer. *Sad music plays*. But Link starts his adventure. Link walks over to the bridge and Saria is waiting there.
Saria: Link *Cricket chips*.I always new you where different.. I knew you where.. oh shit! Never mind. Good bye.. We all no you aren't leaving because this is just a story writing by the Master of Zelda. *Music plays*
Mysterious Voice: Which is really me!
Saria: Don't interrupt me Mysterious Voice! *Music plays* any way Just get on
Link: Like I got on you?
Saria: . go on with the story.
Mysterious Voice: Fine Saria. *Sage music plays*
Mysterious Voice: Ok so let me Narrate! Link gets the ocarina from Saria. And leaves the forest for the first time. And there is a bird.
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora. Did you get all that Link?
Link: No.
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, Did you get it this time.
Link: Sure!
Kapepora Gaebora: You are a smart boy!
Link: what kind of name is Kapepora Gaebora?
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Link: Ya I know that but where your parents on crack when they named you that?
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Link: I know!
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Link: See ya!
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Mysterious Voice: Link then kills Kapepora Gaebora.
Mysterious Voice: But then Kapepora Gaebora comes out of no where because there was a hole from the computer to the story so he is still alive. And Kapepora Gaebora fly's away. And all you can hear is I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Mysterious Voice: Now Link finally enters the castle town.
Link: I finally enter the castle town.
Mysterious Voice: I already said that!
Link: I already said that!
Mysterious Voice: Stop copying me.
Link: Stop copying me!
Mysterious Voice: Fine, I am an idiot!
Link: I know you are.
Mysterious Voice: Crap! Why did I fall for that?
Link: because you suck and have no friends?
Mysterious Voice: That must be why... Hey hold on! I have friends.
Link: Stop trying to make the story longer and just tell the stupid story.
Mysterious Voice: NO! I mean yes... Just stop confusing me!
Link: No.
Mysterious Voice: Ok! Whatever anyway Link looks around the castle town and he sees this girl that is singing.
Link: Want to go to the back ally and get it on?
Girl (Marlon): Sure.
***AFTER THEY ARE DONE***
Marlon: Hey fairy boy, Thanks for letting me see your, PERSONAL Fairy! I love you to!
Link: I hate you I am a player and I will never love anyone! Casue that's what players do.
Marlon: Ok just comeback!
Link: No way.
Marlon: Fine take this chicken anyway. Link: Ok whatever.
*Link takes the chicken and put it in his pocket and it some how fits*
Mysterious Voice: Then Link walks over to the castle. And Marlon is their singing.
Link: How did you get here so fast?
Marlon: Love can do many things.
Link: Stay away from me!
Mysterious Voice: Then Link ran up to a large gate.
Guard: Since I like money I'll let you in if you give me 100 rupees!
Link: I'll kill you if you don't let me in!
Guard: Fine!
Mysterious Voice: Then the guard opens the gate and Link enters.
Guard: Stop their kid.
Mysterious Voice: Link took out his sword and killed all the guards he saw. Then he finally got to a big fat sleeping man. Link jabbed his or her stomach for Link could not tell.
Tarlon: What in tarnation?
Link: get out of my way.
Tarlon: Only if you do it with me.
Link: I pimp's got to do what a pimps got to do.
***AFTER LINK AND TARLON MAKE OUT***
Tarlon: Then ran of as fast as he could.
Mysterious Voice: That was my line. But since you took it I'll take yours. Oh no I have to get back before Marlon kills me!
Mysterious Voice: Then Link jumped over to the hole and got into the courtyard. Link also killed all the guards he could find. He finally got to Zelda's courtyard.
Zelda: Are you the hot fairy boy from the forest who has the rock that I need.
Link: I have more then 1 rock you can see. I'll let you SEE both if you do it with me.
Zelda: Ok, OK this wouldn't be the first time someone has asked me.
Mysterious Voice: So now Link and Zelda do it.
Zelda: Nice rock.
Link: Now do you want to see the rock that I got with the game shark? *Music Plays*
Zelda: Sure.
Mysterious Voice: Link don't forget that you have to look into the window.
*Link walks up to the window.*
Link: Who is that ugly guy?
Zelda: He is the guy that I did it with last night... I mean he is evil...And he is going to take over Hyrule so we are going to have to stop him.
Link: Ok whatever I'm leaving I think that Mysterious Voice *Music plays* is tired so now I am typing! Imagine a video game *Music plays* character like me Link! *types Music plays but it really never did*Can type! Any way here are some questions for next time: Why did Link Make out with 4 people this chapter? Why Tarlon? Why did Mysterious Voice *Music plays*Have link type? How come Mysterious Voice *Music plays* Makes so many grammar and spelling errors? No one knows it will always be a mystery!
Mysterious Voice: BYE! (No let's keep going)
Link: I can speak Spanish just like the Mysterious voice! Here: La mierda that means The Crap or shit! Mysterious Voice: Here is some German to! Navi ist eine sehr stumme Fee und soll sterben! That means that Navi is a very dumb fairy and should die!
Navi: Das ist ja nicht sehr nette Mysteriöse Stimme! Ich bin nicht stumm!
Zelda: Sie müssen Hyrule Burschen sparen! Hören auf, um in anderen Sprachen zu reden, und sprechen in eniglish!
All other then Zelda: Fine!
All other then Zelda: **Leaves**
Link: Hey Mysterious voice! **Music Plays**
Mysterious voice: yes?
Link: I love you!
Mysterious voice: Umm this is getting weird!
Link: Isn't Impa going to teach us Zelda's luyyaby?
Mysterious voice: SO MANY GRAMER AND STORY MISTAKES! AHHH!
**Impa appears out of no where**
Impa: Jeg taler nå i Norwegian! Er her Zeldas sang. *skuespillsang*
Ledd (Link): lært I en sang. **Loks som en idiot**
Translation:
Impa: I am now speaking in Norwegian! Here is Zelda's song. *plays song*
Link: I learned a song. **Looks like an idiot**
End Translation.
Mysterious Voice: Where did I learn these languages? Ha ha ha, next chapter Link sees the dumb Goron's and learns Saria's song an maybe the temple!
Link The Pimp: (Chapter Name By: lemont111)
Mysterious Voice: Hey! Wazzup? The characters are so crazy I think I am now crazy too! So let the Mysterious Voice *Music plays* tell you this messed up story. We last left Link *Cricket chirps* at a party drinking beer!
Translate this!: (who know I could speak Spanish?) ¡Esto será un disclimer en el español! ¡Apenas tan usted sabe que yo no puedo hablar el español tan si usted me corrige! ¡Bueno aquí! ¡Yo no poseo Zelda! ¡Allí yo lo dije! sí, sé que esto es un segundo disclimer! ¡Si usted me odia que entonces muero! Las llamas se comerán con mi sopa. ¡Y sí cambié mi nombre a la Voz Misteriosa! ¡Bye! (ya I know I translated back to English and it came out like this: This will be a disclimer in the Spaniard! Barely so you know that I cannot speak the Spaniard so if you corrects me! Good here! I do not possess Zelda! There I said it! yes, I know that this is a second one disclimer! If you hates me that then I dwell! The flames will be eaten with my soup. And yes I changed my name to the Mysterious Voice! Bye!
Link: This is the best party ever! He said as he was getting it on with Saria.
Saria: I love you Link!
Link: I am only doing this because you asked me too.
*****LATER*****
Mysterious Voice: The party has now ended. Which is a bummer. *Sad music plays*. But Link starts his adventure. Link walks over to the bridge and Saria is waiting there.
Saria: Link *Cricket chips*.I always new you where different.. I knew you where.. oh shit! Never mind. Good bye.. We all no you aren't leaving because this is just a story writing by the Master of Zelda. *Music plays*
Mysterious Voice: Which is really me!
Saria: Don't interrupt me Mysterious Voice! *Music plays* any way Just get on
Link: Like I got on you?
Saria: . go on with the story.
Mysterious Voice: Fine Saria. *Sage music plays*
Mysterious Voice: Ok so let me Narrate! Link gets the ocarina from Saria. And leaves the forest for the first time. And there is a bird.
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora. Did you get all that Link?
Link: No.
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, I am Kapepora Gaebora, Did you get it this time.
Link: Sure!
Kapepora Gaebora: You are a smart boy!
Link: what kind of name is Kapepora Gaebora?
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Link: Ya I know that but where your parents on crack when they named you that?
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Link: I know!
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Link: See ya!
Kapepora Gaebora: I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Mysterious Voice: Link then kills Kapepora Gaebora.
Mysterious Voice: But then Kapepora Gaebora comes out of no where because there was a hole from the computer to the story so he is still alive. And Kapepora Gaebora fly's away. And all you can hear is I am Kapepora Gaebora!
Mysterious Voice: Now Link finally enters the castle town.
Link: I finally enter the castle town.
Mysterious Voice: I already said that!
Link: I already said that!
Mysterious Voice: Stop copying me.
Link: Stop copying me!
Mysterious Voice: Fine, I am an idiot!
Link: I know you are.
Mysterious Voice: Crap! Why did I fall for that?
Link: because you suck and have no friends?
Mysterious Voice: That must be why... Hey hold on! I have friends.
Link: Stop trying to make the story longer and just tell the stupid story.
Mysterious Voice: NO! I mean yes... Just stop confusing me!
Link: No.
Mysterious Voice: Ok! Whatever anyway Link looks around the castle town and he sees this girl that is singing.
Link: Want to go to the back ally and get it on?
Girl (Marlon): Sure.
***AFTER THEY ARE DONE***
Marlon: Hey fairy boy, Thanks for letting me see your, PERSONAL Fairy! I love you to!
Link: I hate you I am a player and I will never love anyone! Casue that's what players do.
Marlon: Ok just comeback!
Link: No way.
Marlon: Fine take this chicken anyway. Link: Ok whatever.
*Link takes the chicken and put it in his pocket and it some how fits*
Mysterious Voice: Then Link walks over to the castle. And Marlon is their singing.
Link: How did you get here so fast?
Marlon: Love can do many things.
Link: Stay away from me!
Mysterious Voice: Then Link ran up to a large gate.
Guard: Since I like money I'll let you in if you give me 100 rupees!
Link: I'll kill you if you don't let me in!
Guard: Fine!
Mysterious Voice: Then the guard opens the gate and Link enters.
Guard: Stop their kid.
Mysterious Voice: Link took out his sword and killed all the guards he saw. Then he finally got to a big fat sleeping man. Link jabbed his or her stomach for Link could not tell.
Tarlon: What in tarnation?
Link: get out of my way.
Tarlon: Only if you do it with me.
Link: I pimp's got to do what a pimps got to do.
***AFTER LINK AND TARLON MAKE OUT***
Tarlon: Then ran of as fast as he could.
Mysterious Voice: That was my line. But since you took it I'll take yours. Oh no I have to get back before Marlon kills me!
Mysterious Voice: Then Link jumped over to the hole and got into the courtyard. Link also killed all the guards he could find. He finally got to Zelda's courtyard.
Zelda: Are you the hot fairy boy from the forest who has the rock that I need.
Link: I have more then 1 rock you can see. I'll let you SEE both if you do it with me.
Zelda: Ok, OK this wouldn't be the first time someone has asked me.
Mysterious Voice: So now Link and Zelda do it.
Zelda: Nice rock.
Link: Now do you want to see the rock that I got with the game shark? *Music Plays*
Zelda: Sure.
Mysterious Voice: Link don't forget that you have to look into the window.
*Link walks up to the window.*
Link: Who is that ugly guy?
Zelda: He is the guy that I did it with last night... I mean he is evil...And he is going to take over Hyrule so we are going to have to stop him.
Link: Ok whatever I'm leaving I think that Mysterious Voice *Music plays* is tired so now I am typing! Imagine a video game *Music plays* character like me Link! *types Music plays but it really never did*Can type! Any way here are some questions for next time: Why did Link Make out with 4 people this chapter? Why Tarlon? Why did Mysterious Voice *Music plays*Have link type? How come Mysterious Voice *Music plays* Makes so many grammar and spelling errors? No one knows it will always be a mystery!
Mysterious Voice: BYE! (No let's keep going)
Link: I can speak Spanish just like the Mysterious voice! Here: La mierda that means The Crap or shit! Mysterious Voice: Here is some German to! Navi ist eine sehr stumme Fee und soll sterben! That means that Navi is a very dumb fairy and should die!
Navi: Das ist ja nicht sehr nette Mysteriöse Stimme! Ich bin nicht stumm!
Zelda: Sie müssen Hyrule Burschen sparen! Hören auf, um in anderen Sprachen zu reden, und sprechen in eniglish!
All other then Zelda: Fine!
All other then Zelda: **Leaves**
Link: Hey Mysterious voice! **Music Plays**
Mysterious voice: yes?
Link: I love you!
Mysterious voice: Umm this is getting weird!
Link: Isn't Impa going to teach us Zelda's luyyaby?
Mysterious voice: SO MANY GRAMER AND STORY MISTAKES! AHHH!
**Impa appears out of no where**
Impa: Jeg taler nå i Norwegian! Er her Zeldas sang. *skuespillsang*
Ledd (Link): lært I en sang. **Loks som en idiot**
Translation:
Impa: I am now speaking in Norwegian! Here is Zelda's song. *plays song*
Link: I learned a song. **Looks like an idiot**
End Translation.
Mysterious Voice: Where did I learn these languages? Ha ha ha, next chapter Link sees the dumb Goron's and learns Saria's song an maybe the temple!