Title: Minority Report - The Remix
Disclaimer: It's kinda obvious that I don't own any of the original characters . they came from the wonderful Phillip K. Dick . or Steven Spielberg.
A/N: Okay, so I'm changing the layout of this fic again, but I'm too lazy to change the layout of the other chapter ... sorry! Anyhow, I, being a Colin fangirl, have decided to give Colin a larger role in this fic, due mainly to the fact that he didn't really appear very much in the movie and that he didn't even appear on the poster [grrr!]
.........................................
INT. OF TEMPLE
WALLY:: *freaks out totally* Okay, don't touch me, don't touch me!!
AUDIENCE: What is his problem?!
COLIN:: Why would I even want to?
TOM:: Calm down Wally, and just answer his questions.
WALLY:: *deep breaths* Okay ...
TOM:: That's good, just keep breathing ...
COLIN:: So how does all this work?
WALLY:: Ssshh!!!! They're sleeping?
COLIN:: Sorry * sexy whisper* how does all this work?
WALLY:: *loudly* Well, I don't know myself, but I'm guessing that we stick the pre-cogs in this pool so that they're trapped for eternity, and we glue these funny things to their head so that we see what they see in their twisted little minds.
AUDIENCE:: Riiiiiiight ...
COLIN:: *blinks* That makes everything crystal clear to me.
WALLY:: Yes, but we have to keep the levels of serotin steady or else they'll slip into too deep a sleep. You see, they only see murders cause it's the most destructive force to the human mind, and only when they're dreaming.
COLIN:: Okay, no need for so much information.
TOM:: It's better not to think of them as humans ... more like those inflatable things you find on swimming pools.
JED:: *helpfully* Or robots.
COLIN:: No, they're much more than that. *winks at Agatha, who winks back*
AUDIENCE:: *blink*
TOM:: You two, go back to work.
JED:: *puzzled* But uh, we didn't say anything.
AUDIENCE:: I think somebody forgot their lines ...
TOM:: Uh ... *sweatdrop*
COLIN:: *saves the day* Sorry. You know, as I'm the baddie and you're the hero, we have a connection.
TOM:: We both wear a lot of black?
COLIN:: No, we've both lost loved ones.
TOM:: Yeah, I miss Nicole ...
COLIN:: *whisper* I meant your kid, Sean ...
TOM:: Oh cut the very cute act Colin, and tell me, what are you looking for?
COLIN:: Flaws.
TOM:: There aren't any. I think.
COLIN:: Well, there must be. Nothing's perfect Tom ... well, except for me. *strolls off*
WALLY:: *leaps away*
AUDIENCE:: Uh-oh.
TOM:: *hands in pockets* Wow, I've never been in here alone before. *hums a merry little tune and wanders a little too close to the pool*
AUDIENCE:: Dammit Tom, get away from the pool!!
TOM FANGIRL:: You can't swim! It's too deep for you!
AGATHA:: *suddenly grabs Tom*
AUDIENCE:: ARGH!!
AGATHA:: Do ... you ... see ...?
TOM:: Yeah, you haven't got any eyebrows!
AGATHA:: *grabs Tom's head and tilts it upwards* Try looking up there.
TOM:: Oooh, funny lady drowning...
AGATHA:: Now go and find out more ... *slips on her goggles and oxygen mask, and falls back into the pool*
WALLY:: *goes ballistic* What are you doing Tom?! Are you insane?! Agatha's mine, you're not supposed to touch her!
COLIN:: *from the window above* Does anyone else think that Wally is obsessed with Agatha?
AUDIENCE:: Yes.
TOM:: Hmm, I must go and find out more. *waddles off*
INT. OF A VERY SPOOKY PLACE WITH A REALLY SCARY GUY PLAYING THE ORGAN.
TOM:: Hi there buddy. I need to get some very important top-secret information from our databases, which will almost definitely not be there and I will be tracked down by the wonderful Colin.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: *blinks* Do you even want to bother looking?
TOM:: Oh yeah, what the heck.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: For that, we go for a riiiiiiiiiide!!
RANDOM FROZEN BODIES START FLOATING UP, IN A BIZARRE BUT RARE AND BEAUTIFUL SCENE.
COLIN:: Hi.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: *really scared* aRgH!!
COLIN:: Did you just scream in alternate caps?
AUDIENCE:: ???
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Yes, I believe I did. Where did you come from?!
COLIN:: The author of this fanfic wanted more of me. So here I am.
TOM:: I don't understand ... we are actors ... in a movie ... audience watching ... yet someone is typing everything I say ... brain overload ...
THE HEAD OF A NEARBY "PRISONER" EXPLODES.
AUDIENCE:: WHOA!!
COLIN:: Whoa. Did you do that?
TOM:: *shocked yet rather pleased* Yes, I do believe I did.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Sorry pal, the stuff you wanted has been erased.
TOM:: Dang.
COLIN:: What stuff?
TOM:: I'm not saying.
COLIN:: Pleeeeeeeease ... pretty pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease ... *puppy dog look*
COLIN FANGIRL:: *drool*
TOM:: Don't try that look with me pal.
COLIN:: It was worth a try.
TOM:: So now I'm going have to beat the information out of Agatha.
COLIN:: Geez, you don't need to beat it out of her ...
TOM:: *pissed off* Yeah, you're a real ladies man, aren't ya? *goes to leave*
COLIN:: Well ... *smug look*
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Be careful. You dig up the past, all you get is dirty.
COLIN:: Shouldn't that be dirt?
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Oh. Yeah. Dirt. No. Wait.
TOM + COLIN:: *have already left*
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Oh well, at least I have my organ. *plays really badly*
AUDIENCE:: Wow, that scene was so tense, none of us said anything.
INT. OF LAMAR'S OFFICE
TOM:: So, I discovered this weird thing, that half our databases have been erased! Dontcha think that's funny?
LAMAR:: Ooooookay ... so what have you got there? *pointing to a "CD" that Tom is holding, which is actually something that looks like a piece of glass*
TOM:: Oh, this is the twins' record of some random woman called Anne Lively. How weird, having an adjective as your surname.
LAMAR:: Not as weird as having a verb as your surname.
AUDIENCE:: Gosh, that was clever. I bet Tom will take a while to figure that out.
TOM:: ???
LAMAR:: So, Anne Lively eh? *ponders*
AUDIENCE:: Oooh, something's up ...
TOM:: So I'm just gonna go now. Byees.
AUDIENCE:: Is the real plot actually starting soon?
Disclaimer: It's kinda obvious that I don't own any of the original characters . they came from the wonderful Phillip K. Dick . or Steven Spielberg.
A/N: Okay, so I'm changing the layout of this fic again, but I'm too lazy to change the layout of the other chapter ... sorry! Anyhow, I, being a Colin fangirl, have decided to give Colin a larger role in this fic, due mainly to the fact that he didn't really appear very much in the movie and that he didn't even appear on the poster [grrr!]
.........................................
INT. OF TEMPLE
WALLY:: *freaks out totally* Okay, don't touch me, don't touch me!!
AUDIENCE: What is his problem?!
COLIN:: Why would I even want to?
TOM:: Calm down Wally, and just answer his questions.
WALLY:: *deep breaths* Okay ...
TOM:: That's good, just keep breathing ...
COLIN:: So how does all this work?
WALLY:: Ssshh!!!! They're sleeping?
COLIN:: Sorry * sexy whisper* how does all this work?
WALLY:: *loudly* Well, I don't know myself, but I'm guessing that we stick the pre-cogs in this pool so that they're trapped for eternity, and we glue these funny things to their head so that we see what they see in their twisted little minds.
AUDIENCE:: Riiiiiiight ...
COLIN:: *blinks* That makes everything crystal clear to me.
WALLY:: Yes, but we have to keep the levels of serotin steady or else they'll slip into too deep a sleep. You see, they only see murders cause it's the most destructive force to the human mind, and only when they're dreaming.
COLIN:: Okay, no need for so much information.
TOM:: It's better not to think of them as humans ... more like those inflatable things you find on swimming pools.
JED:: *helpfully* Or robots.
COLIN:: No, they're much more than that. *winks at Agatha, who winks back*
AUDIENCE:: *blink*
TOM:: You two, go back to work.
JED:: *puzzled* But uh, we didn't say anything.
AUDIENCE:: I think somebody forgot their lines ...
TOM:: Uh ... *sweatdrop*
COLIN:: *saves the day* Sorry. You know, as I'm the baddie and you're the hero, we have a connection.
TOM:: We both wear a lot of black?
COLIN:: No, we've both lost loved ones.
TOM:: Yeah, I miss Nicole ...
COLIN:: *whisper* I meant your kid, Sean ...
TOM:: Oh cut the very cute act Colin, and tell me, what are you looking for?
COLIN:: Flaws.
TOM:: There aren't any. I think.
COLIN:: Well, there must be. Nothing's perfect Tom ... well, except for me. *strolls off*
WALLY:: *leaps away*
AUDIENCE:: Uh-oh.
TOM:: *hands in pockets* Wow, I've never been in here alone before. *hums a merry little tune and wanders a little too close to the pool*
AUDIENCE:: Dammit Tom, get away from the pool!!
TOM FANGIRL:: You can't swim! It's too deep for you!
AGATHA:: *suddenly grabs Tom*
AUDIENCE:: ARGH!!
AGATHA:: Do ... you ... see ...?
TOM:: Yeah, you haven't got any eyebrows!
AGATHA:: *grabs Tom's head and tilts it upwards* Try looking up there.
TOM:: Oooh, funny lady drowning...
AGATHA:: Now go and find out more ... *slips on her goggles and oxygen mask, and falls back into the pool*
WALLY:: *goes ballistic* What are you doing Tom?! Are you insane?! Agatha's mine, you're not supposed to touch her!
COLIN:: *from the window above* Does anyone else think that Wally is obsessed with Agatha?
AUDIENCE:: Yes.
TOM:: Hmm, I must go and find out more. *waddles off*
INT. OF A VERY SPOOKY PLACE WITH A REALLY SCARY GUY PLAYING THE ORGAN.
TOM:: Hi there buddy. I need to get some very important top-secret information from our databases, which will almost definitely not be there and I will be tracked down by the wonderful Colin.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: *blinks* Do you even want to bother looking?
TOM:: Oh yeah, what the heck.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: For that, we go for a riiiiiiiiiide!!
RANDOM FROZEN BODIES START FLOATING UP, IN A BIZARRE BUT RARE AND BEAUTIFUL SCENE.
COLIN:: Hi.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: *really scared* aRgH!!
COLIN:: Did you just scream in alternate caps?
AUDIENCE:: ???
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Yes, I believe I did. Where did you come from?!
COLIN:: The author of this fanfic wanted more of me. So here I am.
TOM:: I don't understand ... we are actors ... in a movie ... audience watching ... yet someone is typing everything I say ... brain overload ...
THE HEAD OF A NEARBY "PRISONER" EXPLODES.
AUDIENCE:: WHOA!!
COLIN:: Whoa. Did you do that?
TOM:: *shocked yet rather pleased* Yes, I do believe I did.
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Sorry pal, the stuff you wanted has been erased.
TOM:: Dang.
COLIN:: What stuff?
TOM:: I'm not saying.
COLIN:: Pleeeeeeeease ... pretty pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease ... *puppy dog look*
COLIN FANGIRL:: *drool*
TOM:: Don't try that look with me pal.
COLIN:: It was worth a try.
TOM:: So now I'm going have to beat the information out of Agatha.
COLIN:: Geez, you don't need to beat it out of her ...
TOM:: *pissed off* Yeah, you're a real ladies man, aren't ya? *goes to leave*
COLIN:: Well ... *smug look*
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Be careful. You dig up the past, all you get is dirty.
COLIN:: Shouldn't that be dirt?
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Oh. Yeah. Dirt. No. Wait.
TOM + COLIN:: *have already left*
REALLY SCARY GUY:: Oh well, at least I have my organ. *plays really badly*
AUDIENCE:: Wow, that scene was so tense, none of us said anything.
INT. OF LAMAR'S OFFICE
TOM:: So, I discovered this weird thing, that half our databases have been erased! Dontcha think that's funny?
LAMAR:: Ooooookay ... so what have you got there? *pointing to a "CD" that Tom is holding, which is actually something that looks like a piece of glass*
TOM:: Oh, this is the twins' record of some random woman called Anne Lively. How weird, having an adjective as your surname.
LAMAR:: Not as weird as having a verb as your surname.
AUDIENCE:: Gosh, that was clever. I bet Tom will take a while to figure that out.
TOM:: ???
LAMAR:: So, Anne Lively eh? *ponders*
AUDIENCE:: Oooh, something's up ...
TOM:: So I'm just gonna go now. Byees.
AUDIENCE:: Is the real plot actually starting soon?