Title: Minority Report - The Remix
Disclaimer: It's kinda obvious that I don't own any of the original characters ... they came from the wonderful Phillip K. Dick ... or Steven Spielberg.
A/N: Sorry about the delay with this chapter, school started. [Argh!! *runs around screaming like a headless chicken* I love the elevator scene, and hmm, I love the chase scene too ... *drools* And The Phantom, I am aware that Tom stole your line [bad Tom bad!] but that was in ode to you.
.........................................
INT. OF SUBWAY.
TOM:: *wanders past loads of billboard type things which keep saying "Hello John Anderton!" Hehe, I'm safe, my name isn't John Anderton ...
STEVEN SPIELBERG:: *coughs and waves script in front of Tom's face* Actually it is. I'm only referring to you as Tom so that we don't confuse any of the fic readers out there.
TOM:: Okay. *carries on walking*
AUDIENCE:: Bad move.
COLIN FANGIRL:: So take it that Colin isn't the main role?
AUTHOR OF FIC:: Not if I have anything to do with it, hehe.
TOM:: *boards the subway*
AUDIENCE:: Baaaaaaaad move. They're gonna getcha Tom.
A GUY WHO LOOKS SUSPICOUSLY LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM HART'S WAR:: *looks up from newspaper, and back to it, which features a computerised Tom doing a funky chicken dance*
TOM:: Whoa, he looks awfully familiar ...
GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM HART'S WAR:: Wow, I've never seen a criminal before. Have you?
ANOTHER GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM DAREDEVIL:: Nope. Dude, is that John Anderton?
STEVEN SPIELBERG:: What happened to Cameron Crowe and Cameron Diaz?!
AUDIENCE:: Isn't it funny, they have the same name.
SOMEWHERE OFF SET, IN AN EMPTY TRAILER.
TWO CAMERONS:: Mmph! *they have tape on their mouths*
INT. OF SUBWAY.
GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM DAREDEVIL:: Maybe we should call the cops.
TOM:: I am a cop!!
GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM HART'S WAR:: Oh, so he is John Anderton.
TOM:: Oops.
AUDIENCE:: Get out of there John! Run!
COLIN FANGIRL:: He'll never make it on those short legs.
TOM:: *runs out but sees his old team heading for him* Eep.
FLETCHER:: Let's go get him boys!
RANDOM WOMAN:: And girls.
FLETCHER:: Fine, fine, boys and girls.
TOM:: *runs away screaming*
AUDIENCE:: Now this is getting exciting.
EXT. OF ALLEYWAY.
TOM:: *stops at a dead end as his team come flying and land. One falls over.* Ooh, rough landing there Fletcher.
FLETCHER:: I'll tell him to work on it.
AUDIENCE:: Talk is cheap. Cut the crap and get to the action.
FLETCHER:: Don't run Tom.
TOM:: You don't have to chase me. Or is it everybody runs?
FLETCHER:: It's everybody runs.
AUDIENCE:: I get the feeling this tagline is gonna be repeated throughout the movie.
TOM:: *does the most obvious thing ... runs*
FLETCHER:: *does the second most obvious thing ... switches on his jet- pack*
TOM:: Stop chasing me! We're friends, remember?
FLETCHER:: Not anymore!
TOM:: *climbs a ladder*
AUDIENCE:: Stupid, they have jet-packs! They can fly! They're gonna getcha!
TOM:: *Jet-Pack Guy leaps onto him* Argh! Noo! They've got me!
INT. OF A BEDROOM. [A/N: Sorry, I love this bit, so I had to keep it in!]
SAXOPHONE GUY:: *sits on his bed, playing his ... uh ... saxophone. I think.*
TOM:: *bursts in with Jet-Pack Guy and crashes on the bed* This is not meant to be a gay scene by the way.
SAXOPHONE GUY:: *nods his head vigorously*
TOM:: Bye.
SAXOPHONE GUY:: Can I have your autograph?
TOM:: Sure! Anything for a fan. *grins*
EXT. OF APARTMENT BUILDING
TOM:: Everybody runs ... *crashes into car*
COLIN:: *waves merrily from inside the car*
COLIN FANGIRL:: And he's back!
TOM:: *runs to the side of the car that Colin is sitting*
AUDIENCE:: Bad move.
COLIN:: *opens door and makes Tom fall over*
AUDIENCE:: Told you so.
COLIN FANGIRL:: Wow, he's so smart.
TOM:: *runs into a conveniently located building nearby*
STEVEN SPIELBERG:: It is not conveniently located. It just so happens to be a car factory near a residential area.
COLIN:: *follows Tom inside*
AUDIENCE:: Now it's gonna get exciting!! *ponder* How many times have we said that??
Disclaimer: It's kinda obvious that I don't own any of the original characters ... they came from the wonderful Phillip K. Dick ... or Steven Spielberg.
A/N: Sorry about the delay with this chapter, school started. [Argh!! *runs around screaming like a headless chicken* I love the elevator scene, and hmm, I love the chase scene too ... *drools* And The Phantom, I am aware that Tom stole your line [bad Tom bad!] but that was in ode to you.
.........................................
INT. OF SUBWAY.
TOM:: *wanders past loads of billboard type things which keep saying "Hello John Anderton!" Hehe, I'm safe, my name isn't John Anderton ...
STEVEN SPIELBERG:: *coughs and waves script in front of Tom's face* Actually it is. I'm only referring to you as Tom so that we don't confuse any of the fic readers out there.
TOM:: Okay. *carries on walking*
AUDIENCE:: Bad move.
COLIN FANGIRL:: So take it that Colin isn't the main role?
AUTHOR OF FIC:: Not if I have anything to do with it, hehe.
TOM:: *boards the subway*
AUDIENCE:: Baaaaaaaad move. They're gonna getcha Tom.
A GUY WHO LOOKS SUSPICOUSLY LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM HART'S WAR:: *looks up from newspaper, and back to it, which features a computerised Tom doing a funky chicken dance*
TOM:: Whoa, he looks awfully familiar ...
GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM HART'S WAR:: Wow, I've never seen a criminal before. Have you?
ANOTHER GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM DAREDEVIL:: Nope. Dude, is that John Anderton?
STEVEN SPIELBERG:: What happened to Cameron Crowe and Cameron Diaz?!
AUDIENCE:: Isn't it funny, they have the same name.
SOMEWHERE OFF SET, IN AN EMPTY TRAILER.
TWO CAMERONS:: Mmph! *they have tape on their mouths*
INT. OF SUBWAY.
GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM DAREDEVIL:: Maybe we should call the cops.
TOM:: I am a cop!!
GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE COLIN FARRELL FROM HART'S WAR:: Oh, so he is John Anderton.
TOM:: Oops.
AUDIENCE:: Get out of there John! Run!
COLIN FANGIRL:: He'll never make it on those short legs.
TOM:: *runs out but sees his old team heading for him* Eep.
FLETCHER:: Let's go get him boys!
RANDOM WOMAN:: And girls.
FLETCHER:: Fine, fine, boys and girls.
TOM:: *runs away screaming*
AUDIENCE:: Now this is getting exciting.
EXT. OF ALLEYWAY.
TOM:: *stops at a dead end as his team come flying and land. One falls over.* Ooh, rough landing there Fletcher.
FLETCHER:: I'll tell him to work on it.
AUDIENCE:: Talk is cheap. Cut the crap and get to the action.
FLETCHER:: Don't run Tom.
TOM:: You don't have to chase me. Or is it everybody runs?
FLETCHER:: It's everybody runs.
AUDIENCE:: I get the feeling this tagline is gonna be repeated throughout the movie.
TOM:: *does the most obvious thing ... runs*
FLETCHER:: *does the second most obvious thing ... switches on his jet- pack*
TOM:: Stop chasing me! We're friends, remember?
FLETCHER:: Not anymore!
TOM:: *climbs a ladder*
AUDIENCE:: Stupid, they have jet-packs! They can fly! They're gonna getcha!
TOM:: *Jet-Pack Guy leaps onto him* Argh! Noo! They've got me!
INT. OF A BEDROOM. [A/N: Sorry, I love this bit, so I had to keep it in!]
SAXOPHONE GUY:: *sits on his bed, playing his ... uh ... saxophone. I think.*
TOM:: *bursts in with Jet-Pack Guy and crashes on the bed* This is not meant to be a gay scene by the way.
SAXOPHONE GUY:: *nods his head vigorously*
TOM:: Bye.
SAXOPHONE GUY:: Can I have your autograph?
TOM:: Sure! Anything for a fan. *grins*
EXT. OF APARTMENT BUILDING
TOM:: Everybody runs ... *crashes into car*
COLIN:: *waves merrily from inside the car*
COLIN FANGIRL:: And he's back!
TOM:: *runs to the side of the car that Colin is sitting*
AUDIENCE:: Bad move.
COLIN:: *opens door and makes Tom fall over*
AUDIENCE:: Told you so.
COLIN FANGIRL:: Wow, he's so smart.
TOM:: *runs into a conveniently located building nearby*
STEVEN SPIELBERG:: It is not conveniently located. It just so happens to be a car factory near a residential area.
COLIN:: *follows Tom inside*
AUDIENCE:: Now it's gonna get exciting!! *ponder* How many times have we said that??