Chapter the fourth
Word soon spread, and by the next day the entire school knew that Tiffany was Harrys long lost sister, or Harry was Tiffanys long lost brother, either one, it doesn't really matter.
Draco had been hiding in his dormitory, and hadn't told anyone, with the exception of Snape, that Ron Weasley fancied him, and wanted to do naughty things with him. He shuddered at the very thought of it. He was just in the middle of a shudder when Snape knocked on the door.
"Come in", said Draco. He quickly added, "If you're Ron Weasley, no i don't want to marry you!".
Snape entered the room, and saw Draco huddled in the corner. Oh how he hated to see Malfoy like this, "But", he thought to himself, "I must stay strong, for Dracos sake".
"So, wassup?", asked Snape.
Draco looked up at Snape, hardly believing what he had just heard.
"What did you say?", asked Draco slowly.
"I ...er...said, wassup?".
"Tiffanys gotten to you too!", sobbed Draco. He put his head in his hands and began to weep. He wept for his country, he wept for his friends, he wept for his potions master, and he wept due to the fact that Ron Weasley fancied him, and because he had just hit his elbow on the wall.
"Don't cry!", said Snape, a tone of panic colouring his voice.
"But it hurts so much", bawled Draco.
"We all feel your pain, Draco", said Snape.
"No you don't!".
"We do, we do".
Draco continued to cry, and suddenly Snape was struck with an awesome idea. He now knew how to rid the school, and in fact, the world, of the evil that is Tiffany Brunswick. Snape silently left the room, and headed towards the kitchens.
Meanwhile, in the Great Hall, Harry was talking to Tiffany about America, whilst Ron looked depressed and Hermione felt like jabbing her quill into her throat and ending it all.
"We have tons of malls....", Tiffany was explaining, very enthusiastically.
"Why doesn't he like me?", shouted Ron, so he could be heard over the din that Tiffany was making.
"Because he's a spoilt snob!", Hermione shouted back. "You don't need him!".
Ron sighed. Hermione desparately wanted to express her dislike towards Tiffany, but felt that it wouldn't be right to say it in front of Harry.
By chance, both Ron and Hermione glanced out into the Entrance Hall, and saw Snape looking very suspicious. Because they were so terribly nosy, and they couldn't take the sound of Tiffanys voice a second longer, they decided to follow Snape and see what he was up to.
They followed him down to the kitchens, making sure to keep very quiet. They watched as he tickled the pear, and went into the kitchen, and waited a moment before doing the same. Hermione slowly opened the door, and peered into the kitchen.
"Whatever is he up to?", she pondered to herself. "And, my, how handsome he looks....".
This was a totally absurd thing to think, because Snape was at least three decades older than Hermione, plus, anyone that wasn't in Slytherin despised Snape, and rightly so. Also, Snape had greasy hair. Yet Hermione continued thinking this thought until Ron interupted her.
"What's he doing in there?", he whispered.
"Oh", she said. "I'm not sure. It looks like he's searching for something".
"What?".
"I said it looks like he's searching for something".
"I can't hear what you're saying".
"I said it looks like he's.....".
"Looks like i'm doing what?", came a cold voice.
Ron and Hermione looked up and saw Snape standing there with an enormous chopping knife in his hand.
"I...we....", stuttered Hermione.
"My God!", exclaimed Ron. "You're going to kill Tiffany!".
Snape looked a little guilty, and was just about to defend himself.....
"Nice one mate!".
"Oh", said Snape, looking relieved. "Thankyou. Now, you better not tell anyone about this. I'm planning on not getting caught".
"Your secret's safe with us", grinned Ron.
"Um...yeah....", said Hermione, still staring up at Snape. "Nice one....mate.....".
Word soon spread, and by the next day the entire school knew that Tiffany was Harrys long lost sister, or Harry was Tiffanys long lost brother, either one, it doesn't really matter.
Draco had been hiding in his dormitory, and hadn't told anyone, with the exception of Snape, that Ron Weasley fancied him, and wanted to do naughty things with him. He shuddered at the very thought of it. He was just in the middle of a shudder when Snape knocked on the door.
"Come in", said Draco. He quickly added, "If you're Ron Weasley, no i don't want to marry you!".
Snape entered the room, and saw Draco huddled in the corner. Oh how he hated to see Malfoy like this, "But", he thought to himself, "I must stay strong, for Dracos sake".
"So, wassup?", asked Snape.
Draco looked up at Snape, hardly believing what he had just heard.
"What did you say?", asked Draco slowly.
"I ...er...said, wassup?".
"Tiffanys gotten to you too!", sobbed Draco. He put his head in his hands and began to weep. He wept for his country, he wept for his friends, he wept for his potions master, and he wept due to the fact that Ron Weasley fancied him, and because he had just hit his elbow on the wall.
"Don't cry!", said Snape, a tone of panic colouring his voice.
"But it hurts so much", bawled Draco.
"We all feel your pain, Draco", said Snape.
"No you don't!".
"We do, we do".
Draco continued to cry, and suddenly Snape was struck with an awesome idea. He now knew how to rid the school, and in fact, the world, of the evil that is Tiffany Brunswick. Snape silently left the room, and headed towards the kitchens.
Meanwhile, in the Great Hall, Harry was talking to Tiffany about America, whilst Ron looked depressed and Hermione felt like jabbing her quill into her throat and ending it all.
"We have tons of malls....", Tiffany was explaining, very enthusiastically.
"Why doesn't he like me?", shouted Ron, so he could be heard over the din that Tiffany was making.
"Because he's a spoilt snob!", Hermione shouted back. "You don't need him!".
Ron sighed. Hermione desparately wanted to express her dislike towards Tiffany, but felt that it wouldn't be right to say it in front of Harry.
By chance, both Ron and Hermione glanced out into the Entrance Hall, and saw Snape looking very suspicious. Because they were so terribly nosy, and they couldn't take the sound of Tiffanys voice a second longer, they decided to follow Snape and see what he was up to.
They followed him down to the kitchens, making sure to keep very quiet. They watched as he tickled the pear, and went into the kitchen, and waited a moment before doing the same. Hermione slowly opened the door, and peered into the kitchen.
"Whatever is he up to?", she pondered to herself. "And, my, how handsome he looks....".
This was a totally absurd thing to think, because Snape was at least three decades older than Hermione, plus, anyone that wasn't in Slytherin despised Snape, and rightly so. Also, Snape had greasy hair. Yet Hermione continued thinking this thought until Ron interupted her.
"What's he doing in there?", he whispered.
"Oh", she said. "I'm not sure. It looks like he's searching for something".
"What?".
"I said it looks like he's searching for something".
"I can't hear what you're saying".
"I said it looks like he's.....".
"Looks like i'm doing what?", came a cold voice.
Ron and Hermione looked up and saw Snape standing there with an enormous chopping knife in his hand.
"I...we....", stuttered Hermione.
"My God!", exclaimed Ron. "You're going to kill Tiffany!".
Snape looked a little guilty, and was just about to defend himself.....
"Nice one mate!".
"Oh", said Snape, looking relieved. "Thankyou. Now, you better not tell anyone about this. I'm planning on not getting caught".
"Your secret's safe with us", grinned Ron.
"Um...yeah....", said Hermione, still staring up at Snape. "Nice one....mate.....".