Wishing You Were Here

Chapter 2 – Waiting

A/N Thank you to everyone who reviewed! I'm so happy ^^. I tried to make this chapter a little longer but it's a POV one and I didn't want it to drag on. Hope you like! *fluff warning*

Three years. It's been three long years Yama...

Tai looked up from where he was sitting, alone in the middle of the park. Black ominous storm clouds leered from a distance.

You didn't even say goodbye... I thought I had forever to tell you- but... Isn't it funny how I always prove myself wrong?

He was completely still, eyes slightly unfocused, staring absent-mindedly into space. Thunder clapped, but it sounded so far away…

That day- when you didn't come to school, I thought, maybe you had overslept or something. But then you didn't show the next day or the next, and I panicked. I don't think I ever realised until that point just how much you meant to me.

A smile played on his lips, and he batted distractedly at a strand of chocolate hair that had fallen into his eyes. The clouds inched a little closer.

I went to your house that night, the lady next door told me you had left four days ago.

There was this sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach but the shock kicked in, keeping me from thinking about it.

I think I did the only thing I knew how to do; run.

I don't know where I ran, or how long I ran for, I just had to run. Run because if I concentrated hard enough on it, I could pretend that I hadn't heard; that none of this was happening.

But then the shock wore off and all I felt was hollowness. I was completely empty, like there was nothing left.

And then there was this deep soul gripping fear. It ripped me up from inside and it hurt, Yama. It hurt so much I thought I was going to die. I wished I would die to make it stop. I didn't know what it was; only that it really scared me.

But I know now. That fear Yama, it was the fear of losing you.

Because I needed you. I needed you because I loved you with everything I had and now I couldn't even tell you. It just- It just tore me up and I was thinking, all these times I could've told you but never did, I felt sick to the stomach.

Now you'd never know how I felt inside. Nobody knew. Everyone just saw the outside of me; no one ever bothered to look closely. Nobody really and truly looked at me. Nobody except you.

And when the mask split, everyone was afraid. They were afraid of me Yama, all my friends, family- It didn't matter. They all let me down one by one because they didn't like what they saw. They didn't like the real me, they only liked the mask.

I didn't know what to do. I couldn't rely on anyone anymore.

At first I thought it was all your fault. You deserted me. I felt like I was losing everything I ever had.

I had nothing left to live for. You were the entire reason for my existence; and you were gone, just like that.

I was angry at you. Angry because you had just up and dumped me, and yet I missed you terribly. Angry at myself because I let you do that to me.

But I could never be angry at you for long.

By that time, I was so wrapped up in my depression, Mum, Dad and Kari thought I would never be the same again.

Sora helped. She did everything she could as a best friend and it helped a lot to know that at least someone cared about me.

Eventually I got better. I still missed you but I think I realised that I couldn't stay like that forever.

It took a long time for me to trust anyone again. Sora encouraged me a lot and I was really grateful for what she'd done. But then it became obvious that she wanted to be more than friends with me and I couldn't accept it. I totally pushed her away. I avoided her at lunchtimes; I hung up when she tried to call. I know it was childish but I just couldn't handle it.

I mean, how could she? I thought she was the only person to understand what I was going through, how much I loved- no love- you, but it turned out she didn't really.

It was ages before I even attempted to talk to her and only because Kari finally got impatient with me and screamed and shouted about how stupid and ignorant I was.

Sound familiar Yama? I'll admit I only tried to talk to Sora because of those two words. Kari was right. I was stupid and ignorant. It only takes a few times for me to finally accept it. It didn't help that you were always telling me exactly that before you- well, disappeared.

It was like you had dropped off the edge of the planet. You didn't leave anything, no addresses, no phone number, not even an email. Takeru didn't know anything; your mother didn't know anything. Yama, she was your mother, for Christ's sake!

I asked everyone, even the people at the office. Nobody knew where you had gone. I still don't know where you've gone. But I'm waiting Yama.

I'll always wait for you.

The sky cracked open and it started to snow.

~