A/N: Thanks Scream Fire.
Part 4
Meanwhile, Tara has quietly left the two friends to talk, she had someone else to check up on.
She made her way downstairs to the sounds of Sponge Bob Square pants, one of Dawn's favorites.
Dawn was curled up on the sofa, under her duvet. Probably orders of the overprotective Buffy.
"Got room for one more?"
Dawn looked up at Tara, startled. She wanted to run to Tara, tell her how awful it'd been, how out of control Willow was... and how much it was down to Tara leaving.
"I guess." She answered as she kept her gaze straight ahead.
Tara slipped under the covers and stared at the TV as well. "What's Bob been doing now?" She asked lightly.
"I wasn't watching." Dawn shrugged.
Tara just nodded. She hated taking this approach but she knew she had to let Dawn talk rather than talk at her, so she pretended to watch the TV.
It didn't take long before Dawn broke out into a rant. "I almost died last night. I saw things I'll have nightmares about for weeks. All those people, hooked on magick. Willow... She was some other person. She called me stuff and... And when she was high, I didn't know what to do. I wanted to get her home, then I remembered there was no one there. Why did you have to leave? If you had stayed it would have been ok. Things would be better but you left, just like everyone else. Is it me? I know I'm annoying sometimes but... I... Why? Why did she do it?" Dawn had talked herself into a tearful state.
Tara gently and carefully put an arm around Dawn and pulled her close. She waited patiently for Dawn to calm down somewhat before deciding to speak. "Dawnie? Do you trust me?"
She continued when she felt Dawn nod. "Well, remember this: What has happened with Willow, me and anyone else who's left, is not because of you or who you are. It's other things, hard thing that are NOT your fault. Leaving was something I thought was best for us all at the time... I was wrong and I'm so sorry you went through what you did last night. But you know, no matter where I am or what'd happened, I will ALWAYS be there for you. I love you, Dawnie. Your family. We're all family around here."
Dawn cuddled further into Tara's side, too choked up to say much.
Tara stroked Dawn's hair, "It's going to take some time for WIllow to get over this. And you to. I know how much she's hurt you, just don't hold it against her too long. I know you Dawnie, you're not even mad at her but you need time to see she is finally herself again."
Dawn shook her head, "I'm not angry at Willow, I'm angry at what's happened. I don't understand."
"Understand what, sweetie?"
"Why Willow would sabotage everything she had for... Magick." Dawn explained.
Tara had to think carefully how she could explain this. She wasn't sure she quite understood herself. "You've felt like you wanted to be someone else before? Someone stronger?"
"Well, yeah."
"Willow felt that to when she realised just how powerful she was. She just wanted to make sure she could protect all of us and it got out of control." Tara told her sadly.
"Yet she only hurt us... And herself."
Tara noted the lack of anger in Dawn's voice."She did, but she knows and she will earn back our trust."
Dawn looked up at Tara with fear in her eyes, "Will she be ok?"
Tara took the time to see just how young Dawn was. Her life was troubled enough without thinking Willow, a sister, wasn't going to be ok. "Oh, honey, Willow will get better. I know she will because she knows she has a problem and we are all going to be here to help her through."
Dawn gave a small smile, "yeah we will."
*******
Tara approached Willow's bedroom as Buffy came out. They smiled briefly in way of greeting.
"Hey, can we talk?"
When the slayer saw the hesitation in Tara's eyes she added, "Will's asleep."
Tara nodded and followed Buffy into her room. She was worried when buffy closed the door.
What was so serious she felt the need for total privacy?
"W-what's wrong?" She asked.
Buffy sat crossed legged opposite the witch. "I just wanted to see how you were holding up."
"Me?" she asked with surprise.
Buffy felt bad that Tara thought no one would be looking out for her. "Yes you.
Tara gave an embarrassed smile. "I'm fine."
Buffy just looked at her, "Tara, I know you. Your being there for Willow, for Dawn and your being the strong one. That isn't easy, trust me, I know. And this must be killing you. I just wanted you to know I'm here for you if you need vent or just need a break."
Tara was silent for a while, "I wish I could take it all away. How ironic is that?" She said sadly, not making eye contact.
Buffy reached out and took Tara's hand, "You love her, it's only natural to want to stop her hurting."
"Last night was so hard, Buffy. I almost did take it away. Then I almost took her to hospital, but there's no way to make it easier. It's inside of her, punishing her the whole time and I can feel it. I can see it in her eyes.God, why did this happen?!" Tara snapped, her despair turning into anger.
Buffy wished she had an answer, it would make accepting the situation easier but she didn't understand why it happened. She sighed, "I don't know."
Tara looked up at the slayer through her tear blurred eyes. "I couldn't even hold her last night. She was terrified and all I could do was sit there. I love her so much, why am I doing this to her?"
"You're doing what's best for you both. Your being there for her, Tara, that's all she needs, things can't just be as they were."
"I'm so scared." Tara admitted.
Buffy squeezed her hand, "It'll be ok. She'll be ok. You will, Dawn will." Buffy changed to her super hero voice, usually reserved for the mocking of Xander. "We're all strong and together we're stronger."
The witch couldn't help but give a small but real laugh.
"Xander should be here soon. Willow's worried he'll be disappointed but I think seeing him might help. You know how close they are."
Tara nodded and wiped her tears. "Yeah, she needs Xander around. I-I should get back in there."
Buffy grabbed Tara before she made a run for the door. When Tara felt Buffy wrap her in a slayer strong hug she let go and relaxed. She felt safe for that short time and it gave her a refreshed feeling.
"Remember what I said." buffy told her sternly.
Tara gave her a grateful look and made her way back to Willow.
Part 4
Meanwhile, Tara has quietly left the two friends to talk, she had someone else to check up on.
She made her way downstairs to the sounds of Sponge Bob Square pants, one of Dawn's favorites.
Dawn was curled up on the sofa, under her duvet. Probably orders of the overprotective Buffy.
"Got room for one more?"
Dawn looked up at Tara, startled. She wanted to run to Tara, tell her how awful it'd been, how out of control Willow was... and how much it was down to Tara leaving.
"I guess." She answered as she kept her gaze straight ahead.
Tara slipped under the covers and stared at the TV as well. "What's Bob been doing now?" She asked lightly.
"I wasn't watching." Dawn shrugged.
Tara just nodded. She hated taking this approach but she knew she had to let Dawn talk rather than talk at her, so she pretended to watch the TV.
It didn't take long before Dawn broke out into a rant. "I almost died last night. I saw things I'll have nightmares about for weeks. All those people, hooked on magick. Willow... She was some other person. She called me stuff and... And when she was high, I didn't know what to do. I wanted to get her home, then I remembered there was no one there. Why did you have to leave? If you had stayed it would have been ok. Things would be better but you left, just like everyone else. Is it me? I know I'm annoying sometimes but... I... Why? Why did she do it?" Dawn had talked herself into a tearful state.
Tara gently and carefully put an arm around Dawn and pulled her close. She waited patiently for Dawn to calm down somewhat before deciding to speak. "Dawnie? Do you trust me?"
She continued when she felt Dawn nod. "Well, remember this: What has happened with Willow, me and anyone else who's left, is not because of you or who you are. It's other things, hard thing that are NOT your fault. Leaving was something I thought was best for us all at the time... I was wrong and I'm so sorry you went through what you did last night. But you know, no matter where I am or what'd happened, I will ALWAYS be there for you. I love you, Dawnie. Your family. We're all family around here."
Dawn cuddled further into Tara's side, too choked up to say much.
Tara stroked Dawn's hair, "It's going to take some time for WIllow to get over this. And you to. I know how much she's hurt you, just don't hold it against her too long. I know you Dawnie, you're not even mad at her but you need time to see she is finally herself again."
Dawn shook her head, "I'm not angry at Willow, I'm angry at what's happened. I don't understand."
"Understand what, sweetie?"
"Why Willow would sabotage everything she had for... Magick." Dawn explained.
Tara had to think carefully how she could explain this. She wasn't sure she quite understood herself. "You've felt like you wanted to be someone else before? Someone stronger?"
"Well, yeah."
"Willow felt that to when she realised just how powerful she was. She just wanted to make sure she could protect all of us and it got out of control." Tara told her sadly.
"Yet she only hurt us... And herself."
Tara noted the lack of anger in Dawn's voice."She did, but she knows and she will earn back our trust."
Dawn looked up at Tara with fear in her eyes, "Will she be ok?"
Tara took the time to see just how young Dawn was. Her life was troubled enough without thinking Willow, a sister, wasn't going to be ok. "Oh, honey, Willow will get better. I know she will because she knows she has a problem and we are all going to be here to help her through."
Dawn gave a small smile, "yeah we will."
*******
Tara approached Willow's bedroom as Buffy came out. They smiled briefly in way of greeting.
"Hey, can we talk?"
When the slayer saw the hesitation in Tara's eyes she added, "Will's asleep."
Tara nodded and followed Buffy into her room. She was worried when buffy closed the door.
What was so serious she felt the need for total privacy?
"W-what's wrong?" She asked.
Buffy sat crossed legged opposite the witch. "I just wanted to see how you were holding up."
"Me?" she asked with surprise.
Buffy felt bad that Tara thought no one would be looking out for her. "Yes you.
Tara gave an embarrassed smile. "I'm fine."
Buffy just looked at her, "Tara, I know you. Your being there for Willow, for Dawn and your being the strong one. That isn't easy, trust me, I know. And this must be killing you. I just wanted you to know I'm here for you if you need vent or just need a break."
Tara was silent for a while, "I wish I could take it all away. How ironic is that?" She said sadly, not making eye contact.
Buffy reached out and took Tara's hand, "You love her, it's only natural to want to stop her hurting."
"Last night was so hard, Buffy. I almost did take it away. Then I almost took her to hospital, but there's no way to make it easier. It's inside of her, punishing her the whole time and I can feel it. I can see it in her eyes.God, why did this happen?!" Tara snapped, her despair turning into anger.
Buffy wished she had an answer, it would make accepting the situation easier but she didn't understand why it happened. She sighed, "I don't know."
Tara looked up at the slayer through her tear blurred eyes. "I couldn't even hold her last night. She was terrified and all I could do was sit there. I love her so much, why am I doing this to her?"
"You're doing what's best for you both. Your being there for her, Tara, that's all she needs, things can't just be as they were."
"I'm so scared." Tara admitted.
Buffy squeezed her hand, "It'll be ok. She'll be ok. You will, Dawn will." Buffy changed to her super hero voice, usually reserved for the mocking of Xander. "We're all strong and together we're stronger."
The witch couldn't help but give a small but real laugh.
"Xander should be here soon. Willow's worried he'll be disappointed but I think seeing him might help. You know how close they are."
Tara nodded and wiped her tears. "Yeah, she needs Xander around. I-I should get back in there."
Buffy grabbed Tara before she made a run for the door. When Tara felt Buffy wrap her in a slayer strong hug she let go and relaxed. She felt safe for that short time and it gave her a refreshed feeling.
"Remember what I said." buffy told her sternly.
Tara gave her a grateful look and made her way back to Willow.