Narrator: Last time where we left off Shinji and Toji take a visit to
Kaji's apartment for a friendly stay, and all the female cast members are
on some trip that the writer never told us. When Kaji leaves the two in
the living room Toji decides he wants to watch a movie. After getting into
Kaji's movie cabinet the two discover that Kaji has a big stash of
pornography. Now both Shinji and Toji are in a shocking situation and...
Toji: Will you SHUT UP! God, can you speak any louder, Kaji might have heard that!
Asuka: Yeah, don't you know that if Kaji hears that they will be in deep shit!
Narrator: Sorry.
Toji: Hey, since when does this show even have a narrator?!
Asuka: Yeah, since when does this show have a...
Toji: Asuka how about you shut up, your not even in this episode!
*Now back to where we left off*
(opens to Shinji and Toji covered in Kaji's porn stash)
Toji: (eyes widen) Oh..oh my God Shinji..Kaji must own like all of the "Hard to Find" titles. (starts to go through all the videos)
Shinji: (covers eyes) T....Toji we shouldn't be doing this! We need to put all this back before Kaji comes back and gets the wrong idea. (begins to put them back in the cabinet)
Toji: Good lord, he's got The Best of Sorority Girls, Pink Pussy Passions, Hot Summer Lust, A Visit to the Nurses Office, The Wrong Hole, Stripper Fantasies, Horny Home Girls!
Toji: (drools) These are the most hottest titles you could ever own!
Shinji: Come on Toji before it's too late!
Toji: Aww, come on, lets watch one, we got time.
Shinji: No we...
Kaji's Voice: Hey guys I will be there in a sec, I need to go take a dump.
Shinji and Toji: O..okay.
(both begin to cram the videos in the small cabinet)
Shinji: Jeez, can this guy keep any more of these?
(crunch)
Toji: Shit, I just sat on one!
Shinji: (continues to put them up) Just...hide it somewhere!
Toji: (throws the crushed tape behind him out of the window)
(crash) (window breaks)
Shinji: Almost there. (stuffs the remaining tapes in the cabinet)
Toji: Are all of them put away? (looks around room)
Shinji: (gets up and looks around) Yes.
Toji: Man that was a close one.
(both sigh then look at each other and gives a high five)
Toji: Lets sit down.
(Toji first lays down on the sofa and sinks in)
Toji: Whoa this is deep!
Shinji: What, the sofa? (sits on the opposite side cushion which suddenly causes him to sink and send Toji flying up to the ceiling)
Toji: Ahhhhhhhh! (hits the ceiling and goes through it)
*8 minutes later*
Kaji: (enters the living room with a six pack of beer in his hand)
Kaji: Sorry for the wait guys.
Shinji and Toji: (both sit nervous) Oh..it's fine.
Kaji: (takes a seat and puts six pack on the table) So guys, where are all the girls at?
Toji: Oh, they went on some vacation that Mr. Ikari gave them, I dunno.
Kaji: Oh really? Man, I wish I could have gone.
Toji: Heh, not me I would rather drink my own giz then be on a trip with bitches like Asuka.
Kaji: (laughs) Whatever you say.
Toji: (turns around to Shinji) How bout you? (pats him on the back)
Shinji: Hey, watch it.
Toji: Sorry man.
Kaji: (takes a can of beer, pops the ring and drinks)
Kaji: (makes a goofy ass smile) Want any?
(Shinji and Toji's eyes widen)
Toji: Whoa, really? We can have some?
Kaji: Sure. (hands Toji a can)
Toji: Alright! This is better than at midnights when Misato gets drunk!
Toji: (opends can and gulps down)
Kaji: (hands Shinji a can)
Shinji: (holds the can in his hand emotionless with eyes still wide open)
Toji: (puts can on table) Come on Shinji, drink up! It tastes great!
Shinji: (makes a faint whimper to where only Toji can hear)
Toji: What?
Shinji: ...look..
Toji: (looks where Shinji is looking which is right behind Kaji)
Toji: (shrieks in shock because he see's a tape that they forgot to put away right behind Kaji on one of the pillows on the sofa)
Toji: Shhhhhiiiiiiiiit....
Kaji: (turns head in confusion) Yo, what's wrong with you two?
(both snap out of it)
Shinji: (fake laughs)
Toji: Oh..absolutely nothing. (takes a big swig of beer) Ahh...soo good!
Kaji: Oooookaaaay..(continues drinking beer)
Toji: (leans over to Shinji and whispers through the side of his mouth)
Toji: Shinji, get up and say your going to get some water and snatch the tape.
Shinji: (nodes head and gets up)
Shinji: Uhh...Kaji?
Kaji: Yeah?
Shinji: I really don't feel like drinking alcohol and I was wondering if I could go and get some water.
Kaji: Sure, just don't get any from the kitchen sink, the water there is all dirty. Go to the bathroom sink for fresh water.
Shinji: Okay. (walks to the bathroom)
Shinji: (on his way he goes behind the sofa Kaji's sitting in and swiftly grabs the tape and heads to the bathroom)
Shinji: (wipes sweat from forehead) Man, now that one was close.
Shinji: (when arrives at the bathroom he reaches for the nob to the door) (right as he walks in he drops the tape and screams in horror) Ahhhhhhhh!
To be continued...
Author's note: Hey if you want a sneak peek at what's yet to come here it is. There will be more stupid humor, alcohol, late night porn viewing, crazy ideas about sneaking into NERV Headquarters, did I mention more stupid humor? Also Aida joins in. Chapter 3 will be up soon after I get my studying done for my final exams.
Toji: Will you SHUT UP! God, can you speak any louder, Kaji might have heard that!
Asuka: Yeah, don't you know that if Kaji hears that they will be in deep shit!
Narrator: Sorry.
Toji: Hey, since when does this show even have a narrator?!
Asuka: Yeah, since when does this show have a...
Toji: Asuka how about you shut up, your not even in this episode!
*Now back to where we left off*
(opens to Shinji and Toji covered in Kaji's porn stash)
Toji: (eyes widen) Oh..oh my God Shinji..Kaji must own like all of the "Hard to Find" titles. (starts to go through all the videos)
Shinji: (covers eyes) T....Toji we shouldn't be doing this! We need to put all this back before Kaji comes back and gets the wrong idea. (begins to put them back in the cabinet)
Toji: Good lord, he's got The Best of Sorority Girls, Pink Pussy Passions, Hot Summer Lust, A Visit to the Nurses Office, The Wrong Hole, Stripper Fantasies, Horny Home Girls!
Toji: (drools) These are the most hottest titles you could ever own!
Shinji: Come on Toji before it's too late!
Toji: Aww, come on, lets watch one, we got time.
Shinji: No we...
Kaji's Voice: Hey guys I will be there in a sec, I need to go take a dump.
Shinji and Toji: O..okay.
(both begin to cram the videos in the small cabinet)
Shinji: Jeez, can this guy keep any more of these?
(crunch)
Toji: Shit, I just sat on one!
Shinji: (continues to put them up) Just...hide it somewhere!
Toji: (throws the crushed tape behind him out of the window)
(crash) (window breaks)
Shinji: Almost there. (stuffs the remaining tapes in the cabinet)
Toji: Are all of them put away? (looks around room)
Shinji: (gets up and looks around) Yes.
Toji: Man that was a close one.
(both sigh then look at each other and gives a high five)
Toji: Lets sit down.
(Toji first lays down on the sofa and sinks in)
Toji: Whoa this is deep!
Shinji: What, the sofa? (sits on the opposite side cushion which suddenly causes him to sink and send Toji flying up to the ceiling)
Toji: Ahhhhhhhh! (hits the ceiling and goes through it)
*8 minutes later*
Kaji: (enters the living room with a six pack of beer in his hand)
Kaji: Sorry for the wait guys.
Shinji and Toji: (both sit nervous) Oh..it's fine.
Kaji: (takes a seat and puts six pack on the table) So guys, where are all the girls at?
Toji: Oh, they went on some vacation that Mr. Ikari gave them, I dunno.
Kaji: Oh really? Man, I wish I could have gone.
Toji: Heh, not me I would rather drink my own giz then be on a trip with bitches like Asuka.
Kaji: (laughs) Whatever you say.
Toji: (turns around to Shinji) How bout you? (pats him on the back)
Shinji: Hey, watch it.
Toji: Sorry man.
Kaji: (takes a can of beer, pops the ring and drinks)
Kaji: (makes a goofy ass smile) Want any?
(Shinji and Toji's eyes widen)
Toji: Whoa, really? We can have some?
Kaji: Sure. (hands Toji a can)
Toji: Alright! This is better than at midnights when Misato gets drunk!
Toji: (opends can and gulps down)
Kaji: (hands Shinji a can)
Shinji: (holds the can in his hand emotionless with eyes still wide open)
Toji: (puts can on table) Come on Shinji, drink up! It tastes great!
Shinji: (makes a faint whimper to where only Toji can hear)
Toji: What?
Shinji: ...look..
Toji: (looks where Shinji is looking which is right behind Kaji)
Toji: (shrieks in shock because he see's a tape that they forgot to put away right behind Kaji on one of the pillows on the sofa)
Toji: Shhhhhiiiiiiiiit....
Kaji: (turns head in confusion) Yo, what's wrong with you two?
(both snap out of it)
Shinji: (fake laughs)
Toji: Oh..absolutely nothing. (takes a big swig of beer) Ahh...soo good!
Kaji: Oooookaaaay..(continues drinking beer)
Toji: (leans over to Shinji and whispers through the side of his mouth)
Toji: Shinji, get up and say your going to get some water and snatch the tape.
Shinji: (nodes head and gets up)
Shinji: Uhh...Kaji?
Kaji: Yeah?
Shinji: I really don't feel like drinking alcohol and I was wondering if I could go and get some water.
Kaji: Sure, just don't get any from the kitchen sink, the water there is all dirty. Go to the bathroom sink for fresh water.
Shinji: Okay. (walks to the bathroom)
Shinji: (on his way he goes behind the sofa Kaji's sitting in and swiftly grabs the tape and heads to the bathroom)
Shinji: (wipes sweat from forehead) Man, now that one was close.
Shinji: (when arrives at the bathroom he reaches for the nob to the door) (right as he walks in he drops the tape and screams in horror) Ahhhhhhhh!
To be continued...
Author's note: Hey if you want a sneak peek at what's yet to come here it is. There will be more stupid humor, alcohol, late night porn viewing, crazy ideas about sneaking into NERV Headquarters, did I mention more stupid humor? Also Aida joins in. Chapter 3 will be up soon after I get my studying done for my final exams.