Disclaimer: *Yawn* Me no write Lord of the Rings. By the way, Tolkien is probably rolling over in his grave because of what I'm writing. Sorry!! ;)

A/N: Okey… time for an update. I've been lazy. What can I say? Ok, um, just to give you guys the heads up, I will be changing my pen name here. I'll wait like, four days after I post this until I change it just so everyone who reads this knows. I'm debating between two. One is Writers Blockhead, which I thought up all by my lonesome self! The other one is my Elven name (yes, I'm a geek, leave me alone. Oh, but if you'd like the website, I'll give it to you. They have both Hobbit and Elven names for you, anyway…) which is Merenwen Elanessë, and I think it's really pretty. So I'm asking for your opinion. Which do you like? Sniff, I'll listen. Erm, I've decided to listen to one of my reviewers and I'll try to do the traveling as well. I have a nifty idea for the whole Barrow-Downs scene, but I'll have to reread that chapter. And one other reviewer wanted me to add in somewhere, "yessum" and I'll do that too. Sorry to go on, I'll shut up now. OH! Wait, also, I'll be writing some of this according to the books, and others according to the movie. And sometimes I'll do neither and just do whatever the hell I want. It depends on which way I like best. J

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Frodo and Sam left that next morning. Frodo led the way while Sam brought up the rear. He kept his distance from his "master", but he didn't lag too far behind. Frodo finally aware of this, paused and turned around to look at his companion.

"Whatsa matter with you?" he asked with a bit of amusement. "I ain't gunna whip ya, you know!"

Sam looked down at his little hairy feet then back up to Frodo with a look of unease set upon his face.

"Sorry, Mr. Frodo, but last time I went with you on a trip… you…" poor little Sam stammered. His gaze turned upwards to the clouds, then the sun, then just about anything but Frodo's eyes.

"I ….what?" pressed Frodo with his hands upon his hips. Sam finally looked Frodo in the eye.

"You chased me around with a hot stick!" said Sam emotionally. His voice sounded hurt.

"Of course I was chasing you around with a hot stick." said Frodo in a you-should-have-known-that tone. "I was trying to brand you."

"You were trying to what me?" asked Sam offended and hurt. Frodo turned and continued to walk as if this wasn't a big matter.

"I was trying to brand you. It's what you're supposed to do with all your livestock." he said calmly over his shoulder.

Sam stopped dead in his tracks and looked at Frodo's bobbing head in front of him. He then shook his head and whipped a tear from his cheek. 'Livestock… that's all I am…' he thought to himself.

****

Later that day, just outside of Farmer Maggot's crops, Sam got so lost in his thoughts, he noticed that he had lost Frodo. Like a small child that had lost his mother, he began to call out, "Mr. Frodo!" Before long, his desparate cries became near screams.

Just then, Frodo reappeared from a bend further down the line.

"For Pete's sake, Sam, SHUT UP" said Frodo irritated. "You're actin' like a baby."

"I'm sorry Mr. Frodo, Gandalf just warned me not to loose you. He said if I did, he'd…"

"Lemme guess." interrupted Frodo. "He'd turn you into a purple three-eyed toad. Right?"

Poor little Sam looked to the ground and nodded.

"Stupid old wizard." said Frodo under his breath as he looked forward to the road ahead. Just then, something plowed right into him. Sam had to fight back a laugh as he watched something collide right into Frodo. His laughter soon turned into a big, "Urg!" as a second thing ran into him.

"Oi, Merry, it's Frodo!" said a hobbit that Sam recognized as Pippin.

"Hello, Frodo!" said Merry as he climbed off Sam. Sam, being a little hurt by not even being noticed, pulled himself up to his feet. He decided to get at the two hobbits.

"You've been in Farmer Maggot's crops again!" he yelled and pointed at them.

Merry and Pippin just blinked.

"What crops?" asked Merry sarcastically. "Ever since that drought hit four years ago, all that he's been growin' is the hair on his feet."

"Yeah, we were just out a playin in the mud and he came runnin' off his porch screamin' like a banshee."

Just then, they heard a voice yelling.

"TOOK! BRANDYBUCK!! YOU TWO HAVE PLAYED IN MY MUD ONE TOO MANY TIMES! I WANT A DUEL!"

A gunshot was then heard.

Merry and Pippin both squealed with fear and took off in the opposite direction. To Sam's unpleasant surprise, Frodo ran after them. Not knowing what else to do and not wanting to be turned into a frog, he followed.

Merry and Pippin talked back and forth as they ran.

"Ol' Maggot's lost the remaining bits of his mind." puffed Merry. "After his crops all went and died out, he's been tryin' sell mud to the fair hobbit-lasses sayin' it'll make em' look younger."

"I say …*pant* why not just get it….*wheeze* for free?" asked Pippin. "Merry and I were takin' a mud bath when you had gone and found us. As for Maggot, *cough* he's clearly over-reactin'."

Just then, all four hobbits tumbled down a somehow unseen cliff… hill… thingy.

Once to the bottom, Pippin jumped straight to his feet.

"Well, that was fun. Wasn't it?" he said in an honest perky tone.

The other three hobbits looked up at him in disgust. Pippin, however, did not notice. Something else caught his attention.

"CACTUS!!" Squealed Pippin. Merry looked down to where Pippin was pointing. They then simultaneously leaped into the air towards the cactus and began to munch with an occasional "ouch" here and there.

"Whatever happened to good ol' mushrooms?" Sam asked himself. Much like Bilbo, Sam had not adapted to this new western thing either, if you haven't noticed.

"They all died out from the drought," said Frodo. "Doofus."

Sam sat down and leaned back against the hill. 'This is going to be a long trip.' he thought to himself. Just then, Frodo grabbed him by the hairs on his little hobbit feet and swung him around to an uplifted root by a tree while screaming:

"Get off the road!!"

Something was coming.

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That's all for now. Me tired. Tell me what you think about the possible pen names and don't forget to review! ::Muah!:: Me love you all!! *Yawn Cough Sniff* K, beddy bye time. I'm a tad hyper….