(Hey Grace this goes to you, and to Shoron, Tyler, and all the weird
people with whom I chat)
Yeah Um I thought of doing this collection of weird things because it's fun to have some more freak-vocab, and this way you'll scare the heck out your friends!! Um I usually say very very weird stuff to people and they usually just raise their eyebrow at me or just blink.um but they always come back with a smart remark that I can back up. For instance, you're so freakin' crazy you whisper to yourself "The world is a round cube" and someone next to you exclaims "what the heck??" and then they start asking you why is your mind so obstructed.well just answer this: "It's because I have you next to me, your evil influence has taken hold of my pea-sized brain, and I'm going to start saying weird things 'til I freak you out and you get away from me." Hey I would say this, except all my friends are as weird as me, and I don't need so many smart remarks.
One of the best times to be an imbecile to people (A/N be proud!!!) is when they're popular preps with no life of their own except copying their most popular friend's clothes, to try to imitate them, but failing. If you're on your own galaxy and you say something like "I wish I was a floating head, that flied buoyantly over the Rainbow Valley Candy factory (open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, once a month). And to rediscover all of Grace's cats that almost died because of the meat producing the Cauliflower Factory was making." Suddenly, the popular scubbus throws you a look of pure loath. Ahem what do you do? Just smile and say "yes I know you too are eager to come to the Rainbow Valley with me, but in Grace's bus there's only so much space for me and a group of Japanese tourists with flashing digital cameras (A/N no offense to any Japanese with flashing digital cameras). I'd take you except what you're wearing is not designed by the Drunk Girl, or Mango, or anyone from the cast of Saturday Night live. So you see, darling, you ain't popular enough to go. Sorry." And then you just do your thing. They're bound to either start crying or try to decipher what you just said.
And have you seen all the stupid logos in t-shirts these days? I myself own one that says "Sugar is good for you". But what I've seen is just the top of stupidity: "Want my phone number? It's 1-800-you-wish", "Boy problems? Just dump him", Thank God I'm beautiful", "stop checking me out" (I saw this one at the back pocket of some girl's jeans), "Oblivious", "The penguins have taken my sanity away", "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because you're all the same", and so on so forth. Hey if you find more of these let me know! Anyway, stick to the script, once I was walking down the street with my mom, and I saw the "thank God I'm beautiful" shirt, on a very ugly girl (trust me she was ugly), and I suddenly let go of my backpack, and cracked up in the middle of the street, with kids coming out of the elementary school. They all thought I was high on something (I probably was), but it was because of all those shifty shirts. I mean, if you see one that really gets on your nerves, just stop them and say: "How can you do this to me? I created you all equally, and now you pay me back wearing this piece of rubbish? You mean to tell me that you're cute, because I made you? Don't thank me, for I wasn't blind when I made you so ugly! You scared me and I ran away and you came out like that! Now do me God ,AKA me, a favor: go home take that shirt off, and grab a can of tuna, open it and put little pieces of sponge inside it. Hit yourself over your head with a salmon, and buy a spiked shoelace. Eat the can of tuna, caress your skin with the spiked shoelace, and chew on the raw salmon." That is sure to freak them out, or if it doesn't work, gimme a call, and I'll fix it!
Yeah Um I thought of doing this collection of weird things because it's fun to have some more freak-vocab, and this way you'll scare the heck out your friends!! Um I usually say very very weird stuff to people and they usually just raise their eyebrow at me or just blink.um but they always come back with a smart remark that I can back up. For instance, you're so freakin' crazy you whisper to yourself "The world is a round cube" and someone next to you exclaims "what the heck??" and then they start asking you why is your mind so obstructed.well just answer this: "It's because I have you next to me, your evil influence has taken hold of my pea-sized brain, and I'm going to start saying weird things 'til I freak you out and you get away from me." Hey I would say this, except all my friends are as weird as me, and I don't need so many smart remarks.
One of the best times to be an imbecile to people (A/N be proud!!!) is when they're popular preps with no life of their own except copying their most popular friend's clothes, to try to imitate them, but failing. If you're on your own galaxy and you say something like "I wish I was a floating head, that flied buoyantly over the Rainbow Valley Candy factory (open 24 hours a day, seven days a week, once a month). And to rediscover all of Grace's cats that almost died because of the meat producing the Cauliflower Factory was making." Suddenly, the popular scubbus throws you a look of pure loath. Ahem what do you do? Just smile and say "yes I know you too are eager to come to the Rainbow Valley with me, but in Grace's bus there's only so much space for me and a group of Japanese tourists with flashing digital cameras (A/N no offense to any Japanese with flashing digital cameras). I'd take you except what you're wearing is not designed by the Drunk Girl, or Mango, or anyone from the cast of Saturday Night live. So you see, darling, you ain't popular enough to go. Sorry." And then you just do your thing. They're bound to either start crying or try to decipher what you just said.
And have you seen all the stupid logos in t-shirts these days? I myself own one that says "Sugar is good for you". But what I've seen is just the top of stupidity: "Want my phone number? It's 1-800-you-wish", "Boy problems? Just dump him", Thank God I'm beautiful", "stop checking me out" (I saw this one at the back pocket of some girl's jeans), "Oblivious", "The penguins have taken my sanity away", "You laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at you because you're all the same", and so on so forth. Hey if you find more of these let me know! Anyway, stick to the script, once I was walking down the street with my mom, and I saw the "thank God I'm beautiful" shirt, on a very ugly girl (trust me she was ugly), and I suddenly let go of my backpack, and cracked up in the middle of the street, with kids coming out of the elementary school. They all thought I was high on something (I probably was), but it was because of all those shifty shirts. I mean, if you see one that really gets on your nerves, just stop them and say: "How can you do this to me? I created you all equally, and now you pay me back wearing this piece of rubbish? You mean to tell me that you're cute, because I made you? Don't thank me, for I wasn't blind when I made you so ugly! You scared me and I ran away and you came out like that! Now do me God ,AKA me, a favor: go home take that shirt off, and grab a can of tuna, open it and put little pieces of sponge inside it. Hit yourself over your head with a salmon, and buy a spiked shoelace. Eat the can of tuna, caress your skin with the spiked shoelace, and chew on the raw salmon." That is sure to freak them out, or if it doesn't work, gimme a call, and I'll fix it!