+Kitto, Kitto, Sonno Mama+
Standard Disclaimers Apply
Aki-niichan, Aki's Notebook
http://clik to/shiine
/Comments are most welcome!/
It had been one of those days, Tatsumi thought, glancing at his watch as he walked down the hallways. His stay at Kyoto had been extended to a full five days and four nights, simply because he could not find the one last remaining soul among Muraki's victims. A prostitute, whose carcass was found hanging from a tree, had insisted that her lover would still come to pick her up from the spot where they often met, refusing to believe that she was actually dead. Apparently Muraki had posed as a customer when he first approached her, and she claimed that whatever the doctor did to her she had experienced much worse from other men.
And so the panic-stricken girl fled and hid from Tatsumi all she could until just a few hours ago, when she had somehow discovered that she actually was dead, hair chopped of in random angles and arms and legs broken. With the matter settled with Tatsumi was now free to return to the JuChoOh. He had only made a sidetrip to buy kanchou some pound cake, but actually he was late enough. Watari could not possibly be able to finish all the paperwork he left behind on time…
Tatsumi opened the door to Watari's lab in a rush, but was surprised to see it empty.
"Watari?"
"Infirmary," Konou said from behind him, patting his back. "Welcome back, Tatsumi-san."
Tatsumi nodded, a bit startled. The infirmary? He noticed Konoe's expectant expression and he grinned at his pleasant superior.
"Aa. I left your souvenir on your desk, kanchou."
"Yokatta!" The old man replied, features that so often met Tsuzuki with haggard lines softening efficiently. "The happiness of old age! Arigatou, Tatsumi!"
Tatsumi waved a hand goodbye, turning towards the opposite end of the hall. The infirmary, was it?
Very well, Tatsumi told himself, it couldn't be helped. He had not planned on visiting Tsuzuki until after checking on Watari's progress, knowing that if he stopped by Tsuzuki's bedside that's where he would probably be staying for the rest of the day. Tsuzuki had sent him his bird familiar the other day just to say that he missed him and Tatsumi had felt absolutely giddy upon reading his message; if only it were that easy for him to be as open to Tsuzuki as Tsuzuki was to him.
"Yes it is!"
Tatsumi started, finding himself in front of the clinic door. Tsuzuki's voice had suddenly boomed all the way outside, sounding very excited over something. Tatsumi knocked.
"Hai?"
He slipped inside the door and outrageous cheering came from Tsuzuki, who had switched to happy-puppy mode the moment he saw the secretary. His bed was cluttered with all sorts of folders and papers, which came flying in the air when he jumped up to greet Tatsumi.
"Oi! Oi!" Watari yelped, diving for the laptop that slid off the sheets as Tsuzuki stood. "Watch it!"
"Aa, gomen, gomen!" Tsuzuki said, scratching the back of his head. He focused once more on Tatsumi, who had handed a small paper bag to Hisoka.
"I hope you like them, Kurosaki-kun." Tatsumi tapped at the top of Watari's head with the bottom of another paper bag, the scientist still on the floor. "And you, too, Watari."
"Mochiron!" Watari assured him, glancing at Hisoka curiously peeking into his souvenir. The boy looked secretly pleased – by now they could all read his expressions a little further, despite the fact that they all seemed like frowns.
Tsuzuki turned wide expectant eyes on Tatsumi, pulling impatiently on his coat sleeve like a child. "Ne, ne, Tatsumi, watashi mo?"
"Hai, anato mo." Tatsumi replied, voice softening.
"Should we leave?" Watari asked, transferring to Hisoka's bedside. He nudged at Hisoka to back up his teasing.
"Unless you want to molest Tsuzuki again." Hisoka automatically added, deadpan.
Both Watari and Tsuzuki's eyes widened, Watari's glare slowly transferring to Tsuzuki. "Tsuzuki! You…?" The words died at his throat, remembering Tatsumi's threatening presence – almost ominous when it came to Tsuzuki's well-being – and grabbed Hisoka by the elbow.
"We leave, bo-ya." Hisoka let himself be led out with his face still buried in a book. 003 came flying after them right before the doors closed.
"Ehe he…" Tsuzuki scratched the back of his head, melting under Tatsumi's *still* calm stare. "How was your trip, Tatsumi?"
"Successful," Tatsumi answered tersely, pulling a chair to Tsuzuki's bedside from the corner of the room. "What is this I hear about you and Watari…?"
"Nan demo nai!" Tsuzuki chirped, laughing nervously. "It's just some joke between us…"
"Of course," Tatsumi replied, clearing his throat. Something about the way Tsuzuki's smile was slight, well, suspicious, but he ignored the sensation nonetheless.
Tsuzuki eyes were shining. "Ne, I missed you, Tatsumi. Did you miss me, too?"
"I did," Tatsumi answered, aware of where the conversation was headed.
"Then you remembered to buy me something, right? Right?"
"Actually," Tatsumi said, controlling a chuckle, "this might come as a surprise. I didn't get you dessert."
Tsuzuki's eyebrows twitched, smile unfaltering. "Is it Kyouyouba pudding?"
"Tsuzuki-san, I said…"
"No don't tell me. Savory buns, the small, soft kind!"
Tatsumi's hand landed on top of Tsuzuki's. "I'm not kidding, Tsuzuki-san."
"Wah, Tatsumi, hidoi! I don't believe you! You always bring me something to eat!" Tsuzuki's sat up immediately, stuffing his hands into Tatsumi's pockets. "Is it in here? In your sleeves? Are you gonna do a magic trick?"
"No, no, I'm not…" Tatsumi hands reached for Tsuzuki's, shaking his head. "There's something else that I had in mind. I saw it while buying kanchou's souvenir."
Tsuzuki looked mildly curious. "Really?" For a moment he thought about what it was, before his expression changed completely. "Hey, you didn't buy kanchou pound cake, did you?"
Tatsumi laughed, despite himself, seeing Tsuzuki's serious expression. "Tsuzuki, I still have something for you. Do you want it or not?"
"Of course I do!" Tsuzuki went on to complain about Hisoka taking his breakfast the other day, biting his lower lip for effect. "So you have to give me something!"
"Un." Tatsumi took out a small red sachet from his coat pocket, handing it over to Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki smelt it right away, wondering if it was something edible, then opened it.
It was… well what do you…
Er…
"Tatsumi?" Tsuzuki blinked. "What's this?"
Tatsumi took the package from his hands. "A pendant."
"Pendant…"
"For the gold chain I gave you, do you remember? Do you still have it?"
For no occasion; Tsuzuki has fallen asleep in Watari's current office, then Terazuma's, and Tatsumi was the one who woke him up. He remembered Tatsumi offering him a ride home, and he had noticed that Tatsumi was wearing a golden chain around his neck. Newly bought, in an assignment to Yokohama, and Tsuzuki knew how careful Tatsumi was with money so he had praised the necklace to the high heavens, the craftsmanship. The next day he had woken up with the necklace on his own neck.
"Or course." Tsuzuki had stopped wearing the necklace only last year, when an encounter with some runaway demons almost snapped the chain in half. The pendant glinted in Tatsumi's hand, a soft purple. An amethyst, plain, cut skillfully, with no adornments. Meant only to match with his eyes.
That Tatsumi… cutting the budget and splurging on a pendant… Tstzuki felt himself absolutely beaming. "Thank you." He wanted to say many other things, as well, remembering what Watari told him the other day. A reconciliation between the two of them was long overdue, Watari told him just this morning, and even Hisoka seemed to agree, but Tatsumi was just too difficult to understand. So kind to him, and yet…
"I wish," Tsuzuki let out, not wanting to suppress the spontaneous feeling, "sometimes, that you weren't so kind. I don't want to misinterpret your actions, Tatsumi."
For some reason Tatsumi looked very surprised when he heard that. And in one of those very, very rare moments, he sounded like he would stutter. "There's nothing to misinterpret."
"I know," Tsuzuki said softly. Watari had insisted that Tatsumi only needed to raise the courage to admit his feelings, but that he still cared for Tsuzuki was a sure thing. If Tatsumi would only say something, anything alluding to that, even just a small word…
"No, I mean," Tatsumi coughed a little, forcing back his embarrassment. "You should know. I want you back, and…"
Tsuzuki's head snapped up sharply. "What was that?"
"And you should take your time thinking about what you feel about things, but you should be sure already about how I feel about things." Tatsumi stood up, ready to leave. He wondered how long it would be before Tsuzuki could fully trust him again – not that he didn't, but this was a different matter from their friendship. He felt, as he expected, Tsuzuki's hand grasp his and knew Tsuzuki would as for some sort of assurance that he had meant what he said. If only he was better at things like this, at relationships, at words, at feelings.
Perhaps in a year he would be able to prove to Tsuzuki…
Tsuzuki was smiling at him. "Okay."
"Okay?" Tatsumi repeated dumbly.
"I believe you." Tsuzuki answered plainly, pulling at his hand. Asking him to sit down. To stay.
"But," But just last week, Tatsumi thought, Tsuzuki had wrenched his heart with his total certainty that Tatsumi was not interested in him, and he wanted to hang himself for hurting Tsuzuki to such an extent that he was very willing to show Tatsumi how he felt but never seemed to think of receiving anything in return. He was about to blurt out something wondrous when the thought struck him.
Tsuzuki… "Tsuzuki-san, did Watari tell you anything?"
"Eh?" Tsuzuki smiled at him sweetly. "Why would you think that?"
"I take that as a yes," Tatsumi shuffled the top of Tsuzuki's head. "So you boys have been talking about me?"
"Plus Hisoka ^^" Tsuzuki added. The weight of Tatsumi's words were swirling in his head. He thought he might burst out in laughter any minute now.
"I see…" Tatsumi squeezed the hand still in his' he had been worrying for nothing after all. So Tsuzuki believe him now? It was, as Tsuzuki said, okay?
Tsuzuki's expression was soft, genuinely happy. But his eyes were serious; there was something else.
"What is it?"
Tsuzuki looked surprised, but not much. "You can read my mind, at times, I swear it." He tugged at Tatsumi's hand once more. "There's one more thing."
"Yes?" Tatsumi asked. Tsuzuki was blushing – kawaii – and he seemed apprehensive all of the sudden. "Go ahead." Perhaps some dessert, Tatsumi thought. With Tsuzuki it wouldn't be so strange a request; food was a happy memory for him.
"Just so, so it would be true," Tsuzuki sat up with a little effort, Tatsumi rushing to aid him, "Would you?"
"Yes?" Apple pie, Tatsumi figured. Or cinnamon rolls – Wakaba would be ore than happy to oblige.
Tsuzuki somehow decided not to ask anymore and leaned forward instead, pressing his lips against his, lingering, sighing softly. A second passes by, then another few. Tatsumi's eyes widened and he touched his lips.
"I missed that," Tsuzuki said, before settling back to his pillow. He closed his eyes. "Now you can get me my dessert."
Tatsumi simply looked at him. He felt his cheeks warming up; Tsuzuki had kissed him and he had missed that feeling more than anything else. And apparently Tsuzuki could read his mind in return. "I thought of no such thing."
"Yes you did!" Tsuzuki opened one eye, giggling. "A slice of pie for the kiss."
"I will get the whole pie, then," Tatsumi replied. To his surprise Tsuzuki did not blush at the implications of that, only smiled broader. And then he felt the need to touch him, to tell him so many things. To say it was real.
"I… Asato, listen, I must tell you this." Those words. They were dancing at the tip of his tongue. If only he could say them. But Tsuzuki opened both his eyes and shook his head.
"I know." He smiled at him and closed his eyes again. "I fell the same way." They stayed there in the silence, in remembrance. Tatsumi stayed until Tsuzuki drifted back to sleep, still holding his hand. And when he was about to leave he thought of their words, and he understood. They were the same.
"Yokatta."
Owarimashita ~
+ E-mail all comments and suggestions for niichan to Kaede Shu, cherrysoftness@schuldich.zzn.com ++
Standard Disclaimers Apply
Aki-niichan, Aki's Notebook
http://clik to/shiine
/Comments are most welcome!/
It had been one of those days, Tatsumi thought, glancing at his watch as he walked down the hallways. His stay at Kyoto had been extended to a full five days and four nights, simply because he could not find the one last remaining soul among Muraki's victims. A prostitute, whose carcass was found hanging from a tree, had insisted that her lover would still come to pick her up from the spot where they often met, refusing to believe that she was actually dead. Apparently Muraki had posed as a customer when he first approached her, and she claimed that whatever the doctor did to her she had experienced much worse from other men.
And so the panic-stricken girl fled and hid from Tatsumi all she could until just a few hours ago, when she had somehow discovered that she actually was dead, hair chopped of in random angles and arms and legs broken. With the matter settled with Tatsumi was now free to return to the JuChoOh. He had only made a sidetrip to buy kanchou some pound cake, but actually he was late enough. Watari could not possibly be able to finish all the paperwork he left behind on time…
Tatsumi opened the door to Watari's lab in a rush, but was surprised to see it empty.
"Watari?"
"Infirmary," Konou said from behind him, patting his back. "Welcome back, Tatsumi-san."
Tatsumi nodded, a bit startled. The infirmary? He noticed Konoe's expectant expression and he grinned at his pleasant superior.
"Aa. I left your souvenir on your desk, kanchou."
"Yokatta!" The old man replied, features that so often met Tsuzuki with haggard lines softening efficiently. "The happiness of old age! Arigatou, Tatsumi!"
Tatsumi waved a hand goodbye, turning towards the opposite end of the hall. The infirmary, was it?
Very well, Tatsumi told himself, it couldn't be helped. He had not planned on visiting Tsuzuki until after checking on Watari's progress, knowing that if he stopped by Tsuzuki's bedside that's where he would probably be staying for the rest of the day. Tsuzuki had sent him his bird familiar the other day just to say that he missed him and Tatsumi had felt absolutely giddy upon reading his message; if only it were that easy for him to be as open to Tsuzuki as Tsuzuki was to him.
"Yes it is!"
Tatsumi started, finding himself in front of the clinic door. Tsuzuki's voice had suddenly boomed all the way outside, sounding very excited over something. Tatsumi knocked.
"Hai?"
He slipped inside the door and outrageous cheering came from Tsuzuki, who had switched to happy-puppy mode the moment he saw the secretary. His bed was cluttered with all sorts of folders and papers, which came flying in the air when he jumped up to greet Tatsumi.
"Oi! Oi!" Watari yelped, diving for the laptop that slid off the sheets as Tsuzuki stood. "Watch it!"
"Aa, gomen, gomen!" Tsuzuki said, scratching the back of his head. He focused once more on Tatsumi, who had handed a small paper bag to Hisoka.
"I hope you like them, Kurosaki-kun." Tatsumi tapped at the top of Watari's head with the bottom of another paper bag, the scientist still on the floor. "And you, too, Watari."
"Mochiron!" Watari assured him, glancing at Hisoka curiously peeking into his souvenir. The boy looked secretly pleased – by now they could all read his expressions a little further, despite the fact that they all seemed like frowns.
Tsuzuki turned wide expectant eyes on Tatsumi, pulling impatiently on his coat sleeve like a child. "Ne, ne, Tatsumi, watashi mo?"
"Hai, anato mo." Tatsumi replied, voice softening.
"Should we leave?" Watari asked, transferring to Hisoka's bedside. He nudged at Hisoka to back up his teasing.
"Unless you want to molest Tsuzuki again." Hisoka automatically added, deadpan.
Both Watari and Tsuzuki's eyes widened, Watari's glare slowly transferring to Tsuzuki. "Tsuzuki! You…?" The words died at his throat, remembering Tatsumi's threatening presence – almost ominous when it came to Tsuzuki's well-being – and grabbed Hisoka by the elbow.
"We leave, bo-ya." Hisoka let himself be led out with his face still buried in a book. 003 came flying after them right before the doors closed.
"Ehe he…" Tsuzuki scratched the back of his head, melting under Tatsumi's *still* calm stare. "How was your trip, Tatsumi?"
"Successful," Tatsumi answered tersely, pulling a chair to Tsuzuki's bedside from the corner of the room. "What is this I hear about you and Watari…?"
"Nan demo nai!" Tsuzuki chirped, laughing nervously. "It's just some joke between us…"
"Of course," Tatsumi replied, clearing his throat. Something about the way Tsuzuki's smile was slight, well, suspicious, but he ignored the sensation nonetheless.
Tsuzuki eyes were shining. "Ne, I missed you, Tatsumi. Did you miss me, too?"
"I did," Tatsumi answered, aware of where the conversation was headed.
"Then you remembered to buy me something, right? Right?"
"Actually," Tatsumi said, controlling a chuckle, "this might come as a surprise. I didn't get you dessert."
Tsuzuki's eyebrows twitched, smile unfaltering. "Is it Kyouyouba pudding?"
"Tsuzuki-san, I said…"
"No don't tell me. Savory buns, the small, soft kind!"
Tatsumi's hand landed on top of Tsuzuki's. "I'm not kidding, Tsuzuki-san."
"Wah, Tatsumi, hidoi! I don't believe you! You always bring me something to eat!" Tsuzuki's sat up immediately, stuffing his hands into Tatsumi's pockets. "Is it in here? In your sleeves? Are you gonna do a magic trick?"
"No, no, I'm not…" Tatsumi hands reached for Tsuzuki's, shaking his head. "There's something else that I had in mind. I saw it while buying kanchou's souvenir."
Tsuzuki looked mildly curious. "Really?" For a moment he thought about what it was, before his expression changed completely. "Hey, you didn't buy kanchou pound cake, did you?"
Tatsumi laughed, despite himself, seeing Tsuzuki's serious expression. "Tsuzuki, I still have something for you. Do you want it or not?"
"Of course I do!" Tsuzuki went on to complain about Hisoka taking his breakfast the other day, biting his lower lip for effect. "So you have to give me something!"
"Un." Tatsumi took out a small red sachet from his coat pocket, handing it over to Tsuzuki. Tsuzuki smelt it right away, wondering if it was something edible, then opened it.
It was… well what do you…
Er…
"Tatsumi?" Tsuzuki blinked. "What's this?"
Tatsumi took the package from his hands. "A pendant."
"Pendant…"
"For the gold chain I gave you, do you remember? Do you still have it?"
For no occasion; Tsuzuki has fallen asleep in Watari's current office, then Terazuma's, and Tatsumi was the one who woke him up. He remembered Tatsumi offering him a ride home, and he had noticed that Tatsumi was wearing a golden chain around his neck. Newly bought, in an assignment to Yokohama, and Tsuzuki knew how careful Tatsumi was with money so he had praised the necklace to the high heavens, the craftsmanship. The next day he had woken up with the necklace on his own neck.
"Or course." Tsuzuki had stopped wearing the necklace only last year, when an encounter with some runaway demons almost snapped the chain in half. The pendant glinted in Tatsumi's hand, a soft purple. An amethyst, plain, cut skillfully, with no adornments. Meant only to match with his eyes.
That Tatsumi… cutting the budget and splurging on a pendant… Tstzuki felt himself absolutely beaming. "Thank you." He wanted to say many other things, as well, remembering what Watari told him the other day. A reconciliation between the two of them was long overdue, Watari told him just this morning, and even Hisoka seemed to agree, but Tatsumi was just too difficult to understand. So kind to him, and yet…
"I wish," Tsuzuki let out, not wanting to suppress the spontaneous feeling, "sometimes, that you weren't so kind. I don't want to misinterpret your actions, Tatsumi."
For some reason Tatsumi looked very surprised when he heard that. And in one of those very, very rare moments, he sounded like he would stutter. "There's nothing to misinterpret."
"I know," Tsuzuki said softly. Watari had insisted that Tatsumi only needed to raise the courage to admit his feelings, but that he still cared for Tsuzuki was a sure thing. If Tatsumi would only say something, anything alluding to that, even just a small word…
"No, I mean," Tatsumi coughed a little, forcing back his embarrassment. "You should know. I want you back, and…"
Tsuzuki's head snapped up sharply. "What was that?"
"And you should take your time thinking about what you feel about things, but you should be sure already about how I feel about things." Tatsumi stood up, ready to leave. He wondered how long it would be before Tsuzuki could fully trust him again – not that he didn't, but this was a different matter from their friendship. He felt, as he expected, Tsuzuki's hand grasp his and knew Tsuzuki would as for some sort of assurance that he had meant what he said. If only he was better at things like this, at relationships, at words, at feelings.
Perhaps in a year he would be able to prove to Tsuzuki…
Tsuzuki was smiling at him. "Okay."
"Okay?" Tatsumi repeated dumbly.
"I believe you." Tsuzuki answered plainly, pulling at his hand. Asking him to sit down. To stay.
"But," But just last week, Tatsumi thought, Tsuzuki had wrenched his heart with his total certainty that Tatsumi was not interested in him, and he wanted to hang himself for hurting Tsuzuki to such an extent that he was very willing to show Tatsumi how he felt but never seemed to think of receiving anything in return. He was about to blurt out something wondrous when the thought struck him.
Tsuzuki… "Tsuzuki-san, did Watari tell you anything?"
"Eh?" Tsuzuki smiled at him sweetly. "Why would you think that?"
"I take that as a yes," Tatsumi shuffled the top of Tsuzuki's head. "So you boys have been talking about me?"
"Plus Hisoka ^^" Tsuzuki added. The weight of Tatsumi's words were swirling in his head. He thought he might burst out in laughter any minute now.
"I see…" Tatsumi squeezed the hand still in his' he had been worrying for nothing after all. So Tsuzuki believe him now? It was, as Tsuzuki said, okay?
Tsuzuki's expression was soft, genuinely happy. But his eyes were serious; there was something else.
"What is it?"
Tsuzuki looked surprised, but not much. "You can read my mind, at times, I swear it." He tugged at Tatsumi's hand once more. "There's one more thing."
"Yes?" Tatsumi asked. Tsuzuki was blushing – kawaii – and he seemed apprehensive all of the sudden. "Go ahead." Perhaps some dessert, Tatsumi thought. With Tsuzuki it wouldn't be so strange a request; food was a happy memory for him.
"Just so, so it would be true," Tsuzuki sat up with a little effort, Tatsumi rushing to aid him, "Would you?"
"Yes?" Apple pie, Tatsumi figured. Or cinnamon rolls – Wakaba would be ore than happy to oblige.
Tsuzuki somehow decided not to ask anymore and leaned forward instead, pressing his lips against his, lingering, sighing softly. A second passes by, then another few. Tatsumi's eyes widened and he touched his lips.
"I missed that," Tsuzuki said, before settling back to his pillow. He closed his eyes. "Now you can get me my dessert."
Tatsumi simply looked at him. He felt his cheeks warming up; Tsuzuki had kissed him and he had missed that feeling more than anything else. And apparently Tsuzuki could read his mind in return. "I thought of no such thing."
"Yes you did!" Tsuzuki opened one eye, giggling. "A slice of pie for the kiss."
"I will get the whole pie, then," Tatsumi replied. To his surprise Tsuzuki did not blush at the implications of that, only smiled broader. And then he felt the need to touch him, to tell him so many things. To say it was real.
"I… Asato, listen, I must tell you this." Those words. They were dancing at the tip of his tongue. If only he could say them. But Tsuzuki opened both his eyes and shook his head.
"I know." He smiled at him and closed his eyes again. "I fell the same way." They stayed there in the silence, in remembrance. Tatsumi stayed until Tsuzuki drifted back to sleep, still holding his hand. And when he was about to leave he thought of their words, and he understood. They were the same.
"Yokatta."
Owarimashita ~
+ E-mail all comments and suggestions for niichan to Kaede Shu, cherrysoftness@schuldich.zzn.com ++