Yowza! I came back for more.
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy belongs to Square. 'Nuff said, ya?
Reflections, chapter 2
Anima: Mother of Pain
When I was younger, I was beautiful.
No, wait. Perhaps that's not quite the right word. I was a bit too "earthy" to be considered beautiful. I spent much of my time outside, so my skin was dark and slightly chapped, having been kissed by the sun and the wind. I liked to smile and laugh, so my eyes had little lines around them. I wasn't afraid to work, either, so my hands were always calloused. But somehow, in spite of my "outdoorsy" ways-or maybe because of them-I met a man who saw me as beautiful, who won my heart and eventually asked me to be his wife.
My parents disapproved, of course. They wanted me to marry someone "respectable," a man whom members of each of Spira's tribes would admire and honor. I think they wanted me to marry a maester, a religious leader. Imagine their surprise when I introduced them to my fiancé, the Guado! It was the first time I'd done anything even remotely rebellious, and to say they were displeased is an incredible understatement. As they spent more time with him, however, they came to see what he truly was: a kind, honorable man who respected and loved their daughter. They came to respect and love him as well, so they were as thrilled as we were when I became pregnant with our only child, Seymour.
Shortly after Seymour's birth, however, things began to change. Not in my marriage, no. If anything, our relationship had grown stronger as we prepared for Seymour's arrival. But Seymour was half-human, half-Guado. He belonged to both tribes, but he was never truly accepted by either of them. The Guado children shunned him because of his human heritage, excluding him from their games and making fun of him when they thought he wasn't watching. The human children we encountered did the same thing; his Guado heritage was quite obvious to them, and so they ignored him, having inherited their parents' fear and mistrust of the Guado.
We did everything we could to help. We offered to talk to the children and their parents. We organized games and play groups, hoping the children could overcome their prejudices and learn to live together, just as Seymour's father and I had done. Sadly, our efforts failed, and Seymour finally told us we didn't need to try anymore. He said he didn't want to associate himself with these people who hated him. "I'll show them," he said. "One day I will be great, and they will be sorry they ever made fun of me!"
I cannot tell you how much it hurt, watching my only son change from a sweet, innocent child to a bitter, hate-filled man. I spent years watching him, knowing that no matter how much power he gained, he would only want more. Ironically, as he gained power, my own strength drained away. I became sick and frail, tormented with the knowledge that I had failed in my duties as a mother. I couldn't protect my son; therefore, I had no reason to continue living. I was ready to die.
But that wasn't my destiny. My love for Seymour and his father was too strong, I couldn't let go of them.and so I became a fayth. Instead of going on to the farplane, I allowed myself to be sealed into this glassy pool.
Now I am the aeon Anima. The pain I experienced in life has followed me to this semi-death. I didn't work as I should have to protect Seymour, so my arms are chained: I can no longer reach out and hold my husband or my child, ever again. I allowed my thoughts to torment me and tear me apart; my new body is covered with wounds that will never heal. The bandages that cover those wounds will never be enough, because I never allowed my family to comfort me, to help me through my pain. I am no longer merely in pain; I am pain. My pain is literally all I have left.and it is all Seymour has left, as well.
And so I pray. I pray that somehow, someday, my son's pain will end. I pray that when his pain does end, I will be free to let go of my own pain. And.I pray that somehow, someday, someone will be able to stop my son from carrying out his terrible plans. Perhaps the young summoner, the one who now carries my aeon, will be able to find him and stop him in time. She must stop him. Otherwise, my son is truly doomed.and all of Spira with him.
@}------
Good heavens, this is way depressing! I'll take this as a sign that I should keep with the Zoloft.*snicker* Hey, thanks to Tidus_DemonStar for the review! I went a little deeper with this one, it came out quite a bit longer (and sadder), and I'm very pleased with the results. Who's next? Lulu? Wakka? Rikku? R&R.
Disclaimer: Final Fantasy belongs to Square. 'Nuff said, ya?
Reflections, chapter 2
Anima: Mother of Pain
When I was younger, I was beautiful.
No, wait. Perhaps that's not quite the right word. I was a bit too "earthy" to be considered beautiful. I spent much of my time outside, so my skin was dark and slightly chapped, having been kissed by the sun and the wind. I liked to smile and laugh, so my eyes had little lines around them. I wasn't afraid to work, either, so my hands were always calloused. But somehow, in spite of my "outdoorsy" ways-or maybe because of them-I met a man who saw me as beautiful, who won my heart and eventually asked me to be his wife.
My parents disapproved, of course. They wanted me to marry someone "respectable," a man whom members of each of Spira's tribes would admire and honor. I think they wanted me to marry a maester, a religious leader. Imagine their surprise when I introduced them to my fiancé, the Guado! It was the first time I'd done anything even remotely rebellious, and to say they were displeased is an incredible understatement. As they spent more time with him, however, they came to see what he truly was: a kind, honorable man who respected and loved their daughter. They came to respect and love him as well, so they were as thrilled as we were when I became pregnant with our only child, Seymour.
Shortly after Seymour's birth, however, things began to change. Not in my marriage, no. If anything, our relationship had grown stronger as we prepared for Seymour's arrival. But Seymour was half-human, half-Guado. He belonged to both tribes, but he was never truly accepted by either of them. The Guado children shunned him because of his human heritage, excluding him from their games and making fun of him when they thought he wasn't watching. The human children we encountered did the same thing; his Guado heritage was quite obvious to them, and so they ignored him, having inherited their parents' fear and mistrust of the Guado.
We did everything we could to help. We offered to talk to the children and their parents. We organized games and play groups, hoping the children could overcome their prejudices and learn to live together, just as Seymour's father and I had done. Sadly, our efforts failed, and Seymour finally told us we didn't need to try anymore. He said he didn't want to associate himself with these people who hated him. "I'll show them," he said. "One day I will be great, and they will be sorry they ever made fun of me!"
I cannot tell you how much it hurt, watching my only son change from a sweet, innocent child to a bitter, hate-filled man. I spent years watching him, knowing that no matter how much power he gained, he would only want more. Ironically, as he gained power, my own strength drained away. I became sick and frail, tormented with the knowledge that I had failed in my duties as a mother. I couldn't protect my son; therefore, I had no reason to continue living. I was ready to die.
But that wasn't my destiny. My love for Seymour and his father was too strong, I couldn't let go of them.and so I became a fayth. Instead of going on to the farplane, I allowed myself to be sealed into this glassy pool.
Now I am the aeon Anima. The pain I experienced in life has followed me to this semi-death. I didn't work as I should have to protect Seymour, so my arms are chained: I can no longer reach out and hold my husband or my child, ever again. I allowed my thoughts to torment me and tear me apart; my new body is covered with wounds that will never heal. The bandages that cover those wounds will never be enough, because I never allowed my family to comfort me, to help me through my pain. I am no longer merely in pain; I am pain. My pain is literally all I have left.and it is all Seymour has left, as well.
And so I pray. I pray that somehow, someday, my son's pain will end. I pray that when his pain does end, I will be free to let go of my own pain. And.I pray that somehow, someday, someone will be able to stop my son from carrying out his terrible plans. Perhaps the young summoner, the one who now carries my aeon, will be able to find him and stop him in time. She must stop him. Otherwise, my son is truly doomed.and all of Spira with him.
@}------
Good heavens, this is way depressing! I'll take this as a sign that I should keep with the Zoloft.*snicker* Hey, thanks to Tidus_DemonStar for the review! I went a little deeper with this one, it came out quite a bit longer (and sadder), and I'm very pleased with the results. Who's next? Lulu? Wakka? Rikku? R&R.