Harvest
Chapter 3 - for real…
ALBERT, THEY REJECTED ME.
"Well, Master, I'm not surprised. After all, you're really supposed to do your job. You know what happened the last time you left."
YES, I DO. AND THAT IS WHY I WILL TAKE PRECAUTIONS THIS TIME. ALBERT, YOU WILL AID ME IN THE CONSTRUCTION OF A NEW DEATH. I WILL NOT ALLOW SUSAN TO TAKE UP THE FAMILY JOB, AS IT WERE. NOR WILL I ALLOW THE DESCENDANT OF DEATH AND TIME. NEITHER OF THEM MUST BE ALLOWED TO TAKE MY POSITION. THEY WILL RUIN ALL I STAND FOR.
"Master, if I may be so bold, then why don't you keep standing for it?"
I HAVE NEVER FELT SO ALONE BEFORE. SUSAN WILL NOT STAY HERE. I KNOW HER NOW, AND I HAVE SEEN HER MANY TIMES. SHE HAS A HUSBAND, BUT NO PARENTS. HER OLD GRANDDAD MUST TAKE CARE OF HER.
"She's a grown woman!"
MARRIED TO A DESCENDANT OF ANOTHER PERSONIFICATION. THE SON OF TIME. AND THEY HAVE A CHILD! HE IS THE DESCENDANT OF DEATH AND TIME! EVEN I CANNOT FATHOM WHAT HE WILL DO. ALBERT, OBSERVE.
Death waved a bony finger. An inanimate skeleton was assembled before him and his servant out of ethereal parts. Death walked to his study, took his scythe, and placed it in the grip of the inert figure.
BY THE POWER GIVEN TO ME BY AZRAEL, DEATH OF THE UNIVERSE, I COMMAND YE TO TAKE UP THE PLACE OF THE REAPER OF LIFE!
Death blinked.
IT'S NOT WORKING, ALBERT.
"Master, it doesn't quite look like you…"
IT SHOULD WORK. WHY DOES IT NOT? I HAVE BEEN GIVEN POWER. I HAVE BEEN GIVEN FORM. WHY CAN I NOT GIVE IT MYSELF?
"Master… maybe you should just stop and maybe stay with your job?"
NO. ALBERT, YOU CONTINUALLY INSIST THAT I STAY. IT WILL NOT WORK. DEATH OR NOT, I MUST SEE MY GRANDDAUGHTER. AND MISS FLITWORTH. I MUST SEE MISS FLITWORTH. BILL DOOR WILL RETURN TO EARTH! SO WILL MR. SCRUB AND GRANDFATHER DEATH! THE INVISIBLE BEGGARS WILL BE A PART OF ME, AS WILL ALL OTHER ACQUAINTANCES I MADE IN THE WORLD. ALBERT, YOU WILL CARRY THE SCYTHE. THERE IS NOTHING FOR IT BUT THAT. YOU WILL CARRY THE SCYTHE, AND WILL BE GRANTED IMMORTALITY EVEN IN THE WORLD. IN THE EVENT THAT I RETURN, YOUR FORMER STATUS WILL BE RESUMED. ALBERT, I NAME YOU MY REPLACEMENT.
Albert stepped back. He watched his simple suit being replaced by a black robe. The scythe rose into his hands. The inert skeleton vanished. Albert became the Death of the Discworld. A lifetimer with the name Alberto Malich was now empty of sand. Another with the name Death filled with grains, pouring from future to past. Bill Door walked into the world again.