(A/N: Hello, and thanx to all my lovely reviewers. *bonks people who read but didn't review on head* I thought this was a really good fic! *sniffles* Well, enough of the self-pity. I just wanted to tell all of you go-for-Kagome peeps that my favorite ending to this fic is actually…*tension*…well, why should I tell you? ^~ ANYways, italics aren't showing up, so…these little asterisks** will mean italics from now on.)
(PS: Does anyone know how to do REAL italics? I mean, I've seen 'em in other fics…)
DISCLAIMER: Unfortunately, she who is known as the blue cat/Sango-chan does not own Inuyasha. However…spiritually, Inuyasha, Duo Maxwell, and Seto Kaiba belong to me!!! ^^
Second Chance
By Sango-chan
Chapter 3
Lost in his thoughts, Inuyasha walked right into someone. Looking around, he saw a small girl-child in front of him. She smiled, unperturbed by the hanyou, and offered him a slightly wilted flower from the bunch proudly displayed in her arms. "Here, this is for you!"
Mutely taking the flower, Inuyasha finally recognized who the girl was. *Kaede! Does she know? Can she tell?* But looking upon the innocent happiness that shone in Kaede's face, Inuyasha dismissed his foolish thoughts. "Thanks," he mumbled almost incoherently, and started to walk away. He was stopped again by Kaede, and this time her gaze was steady and serious.
"Kikyo is lonely," she told Inuyasha, keeping her brown eyes locked with his golden ones. "She's always sad. Can you help her? I know you're a good demon!" Tears dropped down her cheeks. "Please!" The child's eyes seemed to grow years older, shining the weary wisdom of one who knows only too well what the world has to offer. And yet…there was hope there. Not knowing what to say, Inuyasha broke away from those heart-breaking eyes.
"I…I…"
He knew exactly what could help Kikyo, knew how to make her smile again, knew how to lift that burden from her shoulders. But at what cost? Was it worth it to leave Kagome behind…
Growling, Inuyasha shook his head. What was he talking about now? Kagome didn't even exist yet! Besides, all she did was 'sit' him and make fun of him! She was nothing to him…except that she was everything. Maybe he should take a hint from Sesshomaru – there was something to be said about not giving your heart to anyone – then it couldn't be broken.
"AAAUGH!!! What's wrong with me?!" Slapping himself on the head, Inuyasha cursed silently about thinking about taking his half-brother's advice. *That bastard…* He growled again and stomped off as frightened villagers hurried to make a path for the angry hanyou.
*****
It wasn't a comfortable night for Inuyasha, curled up in the crotch of a high tree, as he mumbled and twitched, half-formed dreams and memories tumbling through his troubled mind…
*****
*"Inuyasha! Come back here right now!"
But the young demon ignored his mother's cries and scampered toward the village by himself, pointy white ears pricked forward in anticipation and golden eyes shining with delight. Running as fast as he could go, the five-year-old tumbled a few times, a crimson ball rolling downhill, but picked himself up each time and hurried on even faster. He couldn't believe his luck! Finally, his mother was letting him out of the stuffy castle that he'd always been confined to. What an adventure! The little hanyou frowned, his happiness momentarily dampened by the fact that his father couldn't come. The demon lord had been sick for a period of time, and then, even after he slept peacefully without coughs and groans, the demon servants hadn't let him out of bed! Instead, his father had been shut into a small cave that was soon covered with a mound of rocks and dirt. Probably some kind of weird cure. Not letting himself be puzzled by the strangeness of court physicians, Inuyasha once again resumed his mad scamper toward the new world ahead.
Once he had reached the village, Inuyasha stopped, his golden eyes growing rounder and rounder. There was so much to see here! Woman laughed and talked, men stooped over young plants in the fields, and children ran around playing. Children! Other children to play with! At home, there was no one, for the children of his father's servants told him that he was too weak to join in their games, and the teenage Sesshomaru was always coldly aloof and scathingly ridiculing – even mean. But not here! As the other kids stopped and turned toward him, Inuyasha bounded forward excitedly. How come they didn't have any horns and why were their eyes so…weird?
The others crowded around him in earnest curiosity.
"Hey, how come you don't have any proper ears?"
"And why's your hair so white?"
Before Inuyasha could give an answer, someone stepped in front of him, blocking his view. He looked up into the face of an angry villager.
"Get out of here!" the man snarled, his face twisted in a mixture of fear and rage. "Don't you contaminate our children, half-breed! Get out and take your dirty mother with you!"
Inuyasha stood there, stunned into silence, as behind the man women herded their offspring away. The children he had been talking so happily to a few minutes ago stole curious glances at him as they were lead away, their eyes now tinged slightly with a newfound fear. The small child was suddenly conscious of how everyone stared at him; spinning around, he snarled and their looks of loathing were replaced with terror as they hurried back to their tasks. Burying his face into his red-clothed arms, Inuyasha curled up into a tight ball, sobbing. His bright and beautiful day had turned grim and ugly.*
*****
*Mother walked in front of him bearing the small basket she would sell at the market, the produce from their small summer garden. They would use the money to buy their usual meager supply of winter's dried meat. 8-year-old Inuyasha walked behind as always, trying to protect her. But there was no way he could close her ears to the taunts of the villagers…
"Demon child!"
"Get away from us!"
"Prostitute!"
Inuyasha swiveled as he heard the slur on his mother and bared his sharp, doglike fangs. The man who had spoken met his glance for a second, his terrified gaze resting upon Inuyasha's claws and ears. Then he spun around, staring intently at the ground he was supposed to be hoeing. It would have almost been funny, almost.
"Look at those teeth! It's not natural!"
"Of course it's not natural! What do you expect from the hell-born scum of some blood-flecked demon and that soulless woman?"
"Death to both of them, I say."*
*****
*He had taken grief many times, borne the weight of it, heavy as a river stone, in his heart. Why should this be any different? He had trained for years to keep the tears at bay when they threatened to flow, putting on a tough front to protect Mother, confining the moments of self-pity to his small straw sleeping pallet.
Mother…
Inuyasha's head dropped to his chest as the tears he had fought to keep back dripped down, changing his cherry-red kimono to the dark crimson hue of fresh blood as they fell. Clenching his dirt-encrusted hands in anger, he knew that he wanted nothing more than to tear them apart. Sighing, Inuyasha relaxed. Mother would…had…never allowed it, no matter how frustrated he became.
"But Mother, this time…" Inuyasha saw red as he remembered how not one of the villagers had arrived to help, refusing Mother even to rest in the graveyard. He had dug a grave by himself with his bare hands, shoveless, and laid her there as gently as he knew how. Those same who had rebuffed his pleas for her came to watch him dig, thinking themselves hidden, watching in fearful awe and whispering excitedly to themselves as if it were a sports event. Then, Inuyasha had let his anger cool down to a sort of hot white glow, holding himself back until they least expected it. After placing a few stones as a sort of marker, he leapt off on some nonexistent task.
As expected, everyone sprung up as soon as they thought him gone. Yammering amongst themselves and inspecting, they examined the pitiful grave as if it were an ox on sale. Some of the older boys began to throw rocks, leaving little dents in the loosely packed soil. Laughing as if they had won a prize, the adults cheered their children on.
Inuyasha arrived among them in an angry blur of red and white. Moving so fast no one saw it, he picked up one of the stone-throwers up easily, holding him by the neck. Applying a little pressure, he received a satisfactory gurgle from the boy he held.
"GET OUT OF HERE!"
Scattering like hens before a fox, the little gravesite was soon empty of villagers, but for a man who lingered still, fearful but determined.
"Whaddaya want?!"
Quaking at the anger in the half-demon's voice, the man stuttered out, "P-p-please, sir, that's m-my only child. M-my-my wife, s-she is dead, he's t-the only one left!"
Still holding the boy, Inuyasha stepped forward, his adolescent body still shorter than the man's but already far more powerful.
"And what about your wife?" he asked in a low voice. "Did you laugh at her grave too? Or maybe you just threw rocks at it…?"
"I-I never threw rocks at your grave! M-my bo-boy wouldn't, either!"
"LIAR! GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I RIP YOU APART!"
The man scrambled away helplessly, still casting hopeful glances at his son, but fleeing as fast as possible. Once again the boy in his grip tried to speak, gurgling unhappily. Inuyasha's wild amber-gold eyes met his timid gray ones, and his mind gave a shock of recognization. This…was one of the children he had spoken with on his first day in the village! Henoji…dropping the boy, Inuyasha turned and was gone. Rubbing his throat, Henoji ran off.*
*****
"Mother!"
Inuyasha woke up with his hand on Tetsusaiga, drops of cold sweat pouring down his face. The dreams…so vivid, as if he were living the nightmare a second time. Despite his tenseness, exhaustion drew him back into sleep.
*****
*Inuyasha was picking up firewood when he sensed someone in the garden. He sniffed the air, and then immediately dropped the wood and ducked behind some trees. Demon. They came frequently, always ready to prey upon a young half-breed living alone and apart. Usually those who sought him were weak and easily defeated, but Inuyasha had learned not to take chances. Craning his neck around, he saw the intruder.
Golden-orange eyes stared back at him, alert and slightly interested. Above, strands of snow-white hair partially masked a vivid purple crescent moon, then flowed over the broad shoulders, waving past the red-streaked cheeks to stop below the flowered kimono with its ornately decorated armor and sword.
"Sesshomaru!" Inuyasha gaped in shock, recognizing his brother from the memory of the aloof adolescent who had always treated him with disdain in their childhood.
"Yes, it is I…little brother."
Inuyasha didn't know what to think. Sesshomaru had always been coldly distant, walking seemingly unaffected by anything that happened around him, barely aware of his brother's presence. But maybe, just maybe…he had come to stay, and they could be together as a family. Little brother…surely it was a sign of affection! Maybe Sesshomaru really did care, maybe…!
Leaping forward to greet his half-brother, 15-year-old Inuyasha's eyes shone with new hope. He was so happy, the sharp cut on his shoulder caught him completely unawares. Looking down at the source of the stinging pain, Inuyasha wondered if maybe he had scratched himself in the woods. Anyways, it didn't matter! Sesshomaru was here to be with him! Glancing at his older brother, Inuyasha saw him standing as statuesque as ever, except for the one hand slightly outstretched, a thin trail of blood dangling from his claws…
Inuyasha dodged the second blow barely in time, feeling the air beside his left ear whistle with the force and speed of Sesshomaru's attack. He landed twenty yards away from his full demon brother, his heart tightening and mentally cursing his own hopeful naiveté. Fool, he was a fool! Of course Sesshomaru didn't care about him, would never care about him. Who was he to imagine that someone might actually care?
Sesshomaru surveyed him, his eyes still appraising and seemingly bored. "Well, dear little brother, it seems your speed has hardly improved since we last fought…"
"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" Inuyasha's voice echoed with the bitterness of Sesshomaru's betrayal, and his heart ached with the lost hope that had sprung up when he had last heard that title.
'Little brother'…*
*****
The air shivered with demonic power as the two youkai circled each other warily. One, a sinuous female whose glimmering blue hair marked her inhuman, smirked confidently at her opponent.
"I wonder what half-breed flesh tastes like? Well, I'll soon find out." Laughing so as to expose her sharp teeth, she gave the other a hungry glance.
Inuyasha watched her suspiciously. This was no weakling he fought here, and he would have to be on guard. He had learned that painful lesson many times over during the past few years, as Sesshomaru's 'visits' became more and more frequent. Why did he always come back? It seemed to be some sort of obscene entertainment for his older brother…
She lunged for him, and he twisted his body as she passed, grazing his side. Streaking past him, the demoness left her back unprotected for a split second…a fatal mistake.
He leapt forward, tearing apart her body with one powerful swipe of his claws. As her flesh and blood rained down, Inuyasha stared coldly at the crimson hue of his hands and walked away, leaving the carcass behind. Let the crows feast upon it.
*****
Threading his way through the thick vine-strangled trees, Inuyasha arrived at the planned meeting place. Looking around, he saw that Kikyo hadn't come yet, so he settled down to wait for her. Inside, he was happy, light, as if a great burden had been lifted from his shoulders. This was the answer he had been searching for all these long, lonely years, a way to break the painful cycle of wanton cruelty and indifferent coldness that always resulted from encounters from both humans and demons…except for one. Kikyo…she was different, so different from the others. She was the one who had offered him the way out, along with the mysterious powers of the Shikon no Tama that she guarded.
Inuyasha mused, turning the situation over in his mind. No, he hadn't accepted this choice simply because of that. He could simply take the Jewel and make himself a full demon, powerful enough so that no one would ever dream of mocking him again. What changed his mind was not the Shikon Jewel but the one who held it…
Sniffing the damp morning air, still heavy with dew, he scented her warm fragrance approaching. Standing up, his perked ears informed him that she was coming from his right. He could just make out the shadowy outline of her form approaching, and he stood up to meet her. Kikyo's face came into view, her body…and three bolts of magical power and speed zipped toward him.
Jumping away, the arrows sped past Inuyasha to land harmlessly in the shrubbery. Shocked, stunned, the hanyou faced Kikyo, who held a new arrow nocked to her taut bowstring and whose face radiated cold hatred and anger.
"Kikyo?!"
Her only answer was to draw the bowstring back further, moving her fingers so that the black ebony bow formed a perfect line with her arm and face – and with Inuyasha's heart. He watched, as if in slow motion, as one by one her fingers moved off the string and the arrow was thrust forward with deadly force. "Die, Inuyasha!" she cried out with contempt in her voice as the arrow was loosed and flew straight and steady right toward him. Inuyasha dodged it automatically, his mind still trying to register her sudden betrayal, and his heart already trying to forget the hatred in her gaze…
*****
Inuyasha awoke, grateful for the faint dawn light that gave him a brief respite from the painful memories that had consumed him during the night. Standing resolutely, he set off toward the village in search of Kikyo, the answers he had to have forming in his mind.
He found her just beyond the fields, fending off a demon whose beady eyes were locked upon the jewel that rested at her throat. Kikyo parried his thrusts with quick blows from her bow, and then backed up a few steps to loose an arrow at the youkai, an arrow that glimmered with the same magical powers that Kagome's arrows had always held. The demon gave a small cry, and then its body dissipated, forming a cloud of soft white vapors that slowly faded until they melded with the morning mists.
Inuyasha was astonished. He saw, now, thanks to the annoying preaching of Miroku, that Kikyo hadn't killed the demon. Its soul had been purified and had gone on to that mystical world of the afterlife. He also saw, however, the pale hue of Kikyo's face, and the way her body's muscles hung limp, drained of energy. Naraku/Onigumo's words from the future had been truly spoken. Kikyo's mystical powers were quickly dying…she couldn't last long in the onslaught of demons that would soon come seeking the Shikon no Tama. More than ever, he had to know.
Dropping down in front of her abruptly, Inuyasha faced her. Kikyo didn't seemed surprised, and he knew that she had sensed him long before. She sat a few feet away from him, as if she already knew what he sought.
"Do you think I'm a human?"
Kikyo didn't hesitate before giving him her answer. "You *are*! Half human, at least." Pausing to think of an explanation, she continued, "If the jewel falls into the hands of demons, its demonic powers must only grow. It shall never be destroyed! However…" She glanced at Inuyasha. "If it is used to make you human…than the jewel shall be purified…and shall most likely vanish into air."
Sensing that she was hiding something, Inuyasha prompted, "Kikyo, what will happen to you?"
Looking down with a mixture of emotions – fear, sadness, excitement – she said softly, "I am she who guards the jewel…if there is no jewel…I shall become but a woman."
He was shocked, but Kikyo's words brought back the faint echo of another memory, of a conversation like this one…identical to this one, as a matter of fact. Inuyasha's fists clenched in helpless anger and frustration as he gritted his teeth. Even knowing what would come, he was still powerless to stop it, powerless to cut short the flow of events that would inevitably lead to both their deaths! Everything was going the exact same way as before…Naraku! How could he know this and still let him live to destroy Kikyo, the woman whom he, however unknowingly, had given his heart to…?
"Kikyo…" the sadness in his own voice surprised him.
Speaking her thoughts aloud, Kikyo looked to the ground. "To be but a human…how would that feel?" She gazed at her own hands. "I must lose this power that I am so accustomed to…I would be like all those around me. What then?" She turned toward Inuyasha, her eyes begging him to hear her out. "This power holds me prisoner in its grip…I feel as if it controls my very being. I am caught, my soul unable to escape its boundaries. But…shall I be not who I am when it is gone? Perhaps it is not it that holds me but I who hold it…"
Unable to stand her pain any longer, Inuyasha stood up and said, "Kikyo…you don't have to be alone anymore! If you shed the Jewel's power over you…I can be there to help you."
Kikyo looked at him, her face radiantly beautiful with happiness. "But to be rid of the jewel, you shall lose your strength."
"I don't care! We could do it, together. You're not alone now." Inuyasha repeated to her. Kagome had taught him that…
Rising, as if unable to believe but still wishing to, Kikyo looked him right in the face, right in the heart. "If you wish to be human, Inuyasha, use the Shikon Jewel. Become a man! Tomorrow at dawn to this place, I will bring the Shikon no Tama."
"I promise." With that, he was gone, and he could feel Kikyo's eyes locked on him as he sped away.
(A/N: The kitty made a decision! Kikyo or Kagome…you decide! Heehee…I'll probably finish this in two or three chapters, and all votes will be counted in two months! VOTE!!! KIKYO OR KAGOME?)
Sayonara for now,
the blue cat =3