Charlie's POV
We get outside and walk over to the decorative fountain and sit on the edge. God knows what a fountain is doing in a mall, but it's there. Complete with pennies at the bottom from the people who wish for things.
We have just under an hour until Adam and Maya get out from their film, since it started later and is longer, I checked as we left.
"AAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!"
I'm sorely tempted to Argh right back at her, but I'm quite scared of the consequences. Instead I fight the smirk on my face and calmly say, "You Arghed? Something wrong, dear?"
She starts talking very quickly and I have no idea what she's staying. After a few minutes I deduce that she must be talking Irish.
I goggle at her for a few seconds, then open my mouth with no idea what to say. "Planet Earth is full! Go home!" As unplanned responses go, that was one of my best.
She grins and reverts back to English. "I would, but the Flufflogians don't like me either!" She pulls a face and wails pitifully. "Now I'll never get back to my home planet. Fluffloga is such a beautiful place!"
I have no idea what I'm going to do next. I guess Taz has that effect on people. I amaze myself by picking her up and turning her upside down. I dangle her over the fountain. "Be shushed or I'll drop you in head first!" I tell her.
"Charlie, pull me back up!" She says in a horrified tone.
She called me Charlie. For a moment I think I've gone to far and scared her, but no, when I put her the right way up I realise her hair has gotten wet and the water in the fountain has a wonderful purple tinge to it.
"I only just had my hair dyed." She explains.
I take her hand and we make a quick exit laughing all the way.
I haven't had this much fun for ages. As Taz drags me into a store and I take one last look at the fountain. I pull her to a stop and nod at it.
She claps her hand to her mouth to smother her laugh. The purple dye has made it's way around the system, and now the water spouting at the top is coming out purple too.
"There's only one thing for it." She says.
"What's that?"
"We're going to have to clean it."
I gawp at her. That sounds like something Linda would say, she'd make us own up and scrub the blasted thing.
"I don't have much patience for cleaning." Taz confides. "I recon if we threw a bottle of washing up liquid in there it would do the trick."
Hello dear sweet soul-mate. "You're on!"
"You're going to have to buy it, I stick out like a sore thumb."
"Having the same colour hair as a bruise?" I say.
She grins and elbows me in ribs. "You go buy it, I'm going to the ladies to sit under a hand dryer and see if I can sort out my hair. I look kinda suspicious."
I meet Taz quarter of an hour later. Her hair is standing out wildly in all directions. She obviously doesn't care either. I hate girls who are obsessed with how they look. Besides, I think she's cute.
I did not just have that thought. I have a girlfriend. I'm perfectly happy.
Yes, I'm perfectly happy with my boring activist girlfriend who would never dream of vandalising a water fountain in the name of having a good time.
Taz takes the detergent bottle from me and viciously stabs it with her keys. She takes off her jacket and folds it over her arm, concealing the bottle.
We saunter over to the fountain, drop it in and walk away calmly. We're at the other side of the mall before we stop walking. And our pace had stepped up several notches.
My heart is pounding, we could be in so much trouble for this. Taz's face is lit up with exhilaration. Again, I have to say, I've not had such a good time in ages. I'm definitely glad I came.
"Ooh! Toy shop!" She says, looking around. "Can we go in? Please!!"
Who am I to deny her?
I follow her and she looks like a kid at Christmas. I hope she doesn't have any more wild plans. I don't know if I can keep up with her.
"Race ya?" She says, pointing to some space hoppers.
Stop thinking, Conway. She reads your mind.
"I'm highly tempted. If I wasn't almost six feet tall I would say yes, but you have an unfair advantage, since you haven't grown since you were the age Space Hoppers were invented for." I grin.
"I'll give you a head start." She grins back.
"Let's see what else they have in here." I suggest.
She slips her hand through my arm and we continue deeper into the store…
Right into the Ice Age section. Her eyes light up. "It's the bizarre squirrelly thing!" She says, holding up a toy. "It's so cute!" She turns over the tag, winces at the price, but says, "It's called Scrat! Bless!"
Cue her bizarre squirrelly thing impression.
As anticipated, she does launch into a highly amusing impersonation of it.
I take the toy off her and march off as if in a huff. She follows, a little confused, but still making strange 'eek'ing noises.
I set the toy down on the counter and reach for my wallet. She's completely dumbfounded. She's silent. It's a miracle.
And I feel really good as I hand the Scrat to her, and not just because she's quieted down.
"Thanks, Charles."
I take her hand again as we walk out of the store, no thought goes into the action, I just do it. "You're more than welcome."
Outside of the store kids are surging towards the other end of the mall. She grabs one in a fairly aggressive way.
"What's happening?" She asks in an innocent tone. "Is somebody famous here?"
"No!" He replies excitedly. "Someone's thrown something in the fountain, there's purple foam everywhere!"
Taz and I exchange amused looks. "This I gotta see!" She decides and starts dragging me to the other end of the mall.
We follow the crowd, and I begin to get nervous about Taz's hair. She sticks out a mile in a crowd of boring looking people.
Conway, you just gave her another indirect compliment.
Not out loud.
Now you're having an internal argument.
"Oh. My. God." Taz sums it up rather well.
There is a mountain of purple foam where the fountain used to be. And it's surrounded by every single security guard in Minnesota.
"Protect the bubbles!" I say to Taz, who gets what I'm saying and crumples on the ground with laughter.
Someone taps me on the shoulder. I turn to face Maya, who glances at the hysterical purple leprechaun at my feet and then to the Great Bubble Mountain. She sighs deeply. "How much soda did you give her?"
"None." I reply.
"She did this without the aid of saccharine?" Maya rolls her eyes at me. "You encouraged her, didn't you?"
I offer my hand to Taz and she gets up, there are tears streaming down her face. Maya can't fight the laughter, and with Banksie doubled up in mirth, there really is no point.
I have to almost carry Taz out of the mall, and as we walk it occurs to me that Maya never even considered that this wasn't Taz's doing.
I wonder what else she's done.