Finding Faith
Chapter 5

Coming into Queen Beatrix International Airport
Oranjestad, Aruba
10:45 AM, May 20th 2006

As the Cessna Citation descended making its final approach to the airport, Faith could only stare out the window at the bluest water she'd ever seen in her life. The facts that they were flying in a luxury corporate jet, and spending two weeks in the Caribbean sun at a private home made the whole thing seem surreal.

She turned and looked at the man sitting beside her. Once, he had been the Zeppo of the Scooby Gang; now he's the head of the Supernatural Branch of the X-Files Division. He is a man who commanded respect, and he got it because he had earned it.

Looking closer at him, Faith could see that some of the boy still remained inside. She saw the boy who was excited because he was taking her someplace new and fun. Faith felt her own excitement grow as she thought about two weeks with Xander and no work. It was going to be just sun and fun for the two of them.

She was still wondering if she had really heard him say that he loved her on that road in Oklahoma, or whether she had just dreamt it. Now would be the time to find out, she told herself.

The plane landed and taxied over to the parking area for private jets. The ground crew ran the stair ramp up to the plane and the couple strode down the stairs, basking in the Caribbean sun. Xander left a few last-minute instructions for the pilot, gathered up their luggage and they then rode the cart over to the terminal. There, Xander picked up the car that was reserved for them, and the directions to Iguana Villa.

Mulder and Scully had stayed here a couple of years ago before to recuperate, when Mulder had been injured by a vampire, and they unreservedly recommended it to anyone who needed to get away. was a huge three bedroom private house on the beach in Malmok. The beach was white sand, and it was in a cove perfect for snorkeling.

They picked up the Mustang convertible, and headed out to the villa.

Xander pulled in the driveway and parked in the carport. Popping the trunk, he grabbed their luggage and carried it in.

Faith was amazed at the luxury the place exuded. It just said peace and comfort in quiet understated elegance. She explored while Xander put the luggage in the master bedroom.

When she went to look for Xander, she found him out on the deck, standing by the hot tub, looking out at the beach. It was beautiful.

Hearing her come up behind him, he reached around behind himself and pulled her to him.

"It's beautiful," she whispered.

"Yes, it is, and so are you," he said back to her, kissing the top of her head. "So, since we were up late last night, and didn't sleep much the day before, how about a nap, and then we can go into town for dinner later?"

"Works for me." Faith replied, yawning.

Later that Afternoon

Xander woke first. He lay there quietly, enjoying the feel of the brunette sleeping up against him. Since finding Faith he had felt more relaxed; he focused easier and he felt whole. He brushed the hair back out of her face and smiled as she struggled to wake up.

Her beautiful hazel eyes opened to find Xander looking at her; to her embarrassment she blushed.

"Damn you, Xander, I always find you staring at me when I wake up," she greeted him.

He leaned down and kissed her on the forehead before speaking to her.

"Do you want to get the first shower while I check in?"

"Yeah, sounds good to me. What time is it, anyway?"

"Little before five; we slept about six hours. We both must have been exhausted," he told her.

They both got up and Faith grabbed some clothes and headed for the shower, while Xander went into the living room and called Mulder.

According to his boss, absolutely nothing was going on that required their branch's attention, so everything was set for Buffy and the rest of the gang to arrive next Saturday. Mulder and Scully, unfortunately, had to testify to Congress, and were going to have to pass on their visit here this time. Evidently, several members of Congress were still looking for someone to blame for the Turners Falls incident.

Hearing Dana issuing instructions to Mulder in the background, Xander grinned and promised that they both would relax and have a good time. He also agreed to check in again, in three days time. For Xander and Faith, it was their time to relax.

Faith exited the shower, wrapped in a towel, and leaned out the door.

"How should I dress for dinner Xan?"

"Casual, I guess. We're going out to a pretty nice restaurant, though, so I'm not sure," he replied.

Faith looked over what she had brought and finally picked out a maroon, backless, halter top cocktail dress that came to her knees. There was, however, a slit in the left side that went up to almost her hip.

Faith dressed slowly, hoping to pleasantly shock Xander, if possible. She even chose a pair of nylons with the seam running up the back of the leg that he had mentioned turned him on.

She then slipped on a pair of strappy heeled sandals that she knew he liked. Their relationship needed to move forward, and she was going to see if she could give it a damn good shove.

Xander also showered and dressed slowly, as he pensively considered their relationship, trying to decide how to get things moving as well. He pulled on a maroon dress shirt and khaki slacks and then, after a minute's thought, grabbed a tan and maroon Jerry Garcia tie and knotted that around his neck. He slipped on his suede blazer as he settled down to wait for Faith to finish getting ready.

Catching some movement out of the corner of his eye, Xander turned his head to look.

When he looked at the gorgeous brunette full on, Xander's breath caught, and he felt as though he had been punched in the stomach.

Faith had put her hair up, leaving the velvet texture of her tanned neck and shoulders exposed. The thin strapped dress was modest, but displayed enough cleavage to attract interest.

The way the dress displayed her newly recovered figure was eye catching as well. Her legs and little shoes fit the outfit perfectly. When she saw him watching, his eyes expressing his pleasure, she gave a little spin.

Xander noticed the tiny ring on her second toe of her left foot, and saw the line running up the back of her nylons and almost went into meltdown.

"You like?" she asked.

"Very much," he said as he slowly walked over to her.

He took her hands and looked into her eyes.

"You are so very beautiful, Faith." Xander told her in a low voice, as he looked into her eyes. "Almost more than I can take."

Faith wanted to reply, but her throat started to choke up when she tried to speak, so instead, she asked when dinner was. Xander leaned in and kissed her on the lips softly, barely a peck, then pulled back. Taking her hand, they headed toward the door.

In the convertible on the way to the restaurant, Faith checked Xander out. Dressed casually, yet stylishly, and muscular in way that many hope to obtain, but never do, Xander wore clothes very well. He was definitely not the boy she had once used and abused. Before she knew it, her mood had darkened as she thought of their past.

"What's up, Faith?"

"Huh?" she replied, looking up, confused.

"You look upset, Faith. I was wondering what was wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing, Xan…" she answered.

"Faith, you never have to hide things from me. What is it?"

Faith looked like she didn't know what to do, then grinned.

"I was just thinking about our first time together, and how badly I treated you. I was also thinking how much you have changed."

"That's in the past, Faith. Neither one of us was mature enough to know what was going on. I was all hormones, and you were coming down from an adrenalin high. It happened, just forget it and go on."

Faith looked at him as he said it and realized he truly believed it. That thought made her feel much better.

They arrived at the Amazonia, undeniably the best restaurant on the island, and situated on a beautiful stretch of beach.

They were seated by the windows overlooking the beach, and took a moment to glance at the menus they were given. Xander ordered wine for them when their waiter came up for their drink order, and then looked into Faith's eyes.

\\ God I could drowned in her/his eyes, // they each thought.

As the two enjoyed their dinner, talking the time to savor the food and each other's company, they talked. About everything that had happened to them over the years, and what they'd been through, both together and separately. And finally, when they were finished with dinner, they moved into the lounge and sat near the dance floor.

They sat in the love seat together, relishing the closeness it offered, but fearful of where their thoughts were heading.

\\ Why is it that I can't decide how I really feel about him. Why is it so hard?. // thought Faith.

\\ I know how I feel and why, so why can't I tell her? // wondered Xander.

The band started to play a gentle soft rock song and Xander suddenly stood and turned to Faith, holding out his hand for hers.

"Would you like to dance?"

"Love to," she smiled .

They made their way to the dance floor and began to dance, not too close, but not too far apart.

The song ended all too soon, and the band quickly started again and started playing a soft rock ballad that was one of Xander's favorites. It was a very slow song and he wasn't sure how Faith would deal with it, but he thought 'what the heck.'

He opened his arms in invitation, and was pleasantly surprised when Faith stepped into his embrace. As the song played, he hugged her tighter.

Faith danced slowly along with Xander, and listening to the words of the song, she felt like she was hearing them for the very first time.

I've been lonely
I've been waiting for you
I'm pretending and that's all I can do
The love I'm sending
Ain't making it through to your heart

And in a way she was hearing for the very first time, because she had never really cared about love before.

Their first time together had been a mistake; not because they did it, but because of how badly it had ended. She had always made jokes about the "Hungry and Horney" bit about Slaying, but Buffy had confided to her once that she felt the same way. It had happened, and now it couldn't be taken back.

You've been hiding - never letting it show
Always trying to keep it under control
You got it down and you're well
On your way to the top
But there's something that you forgot

As she listened to the words, her thoughts came back to the man who was holding her, and she lay her head on his shoulder. She could hear his heart beating as she thought about her troubled past.

What about love
Don't you want someone to care about you
What about love
Don't let it slip away
What about love
I only want to share it with you
You might need it some day

When she blew into Sunnydale all those years ago, she was hurting. Hurting because of having seen her Watcher killed in front of her. The woman who treated her more like a daughter, as someone worth caring about, rather than as a Slayer, a tool to be used until it broke, had died because of her. If she had never met Faith, she would probably still be alive today.

She was hurting so badly when she finally arrived in Sunnydale that she created a false personality for everyone else to see. A personality that allowed her to hurt everyone she came into contact with, Xander most of all, because she suspected that he saw right through her façade.

I can't tell you what you're feeling inside
And I can't sell you what you don't want to buy
Something's missing and you got to
Look back on your life
You know something here just ain't right

She hugged him tighter. She knew he loved her, but could she love him? Turning slightly and pulling back a bit, she looked up at him. He was looking directly at her and their eyes met. What she saw in his eyes told her everything she needed to know.

What about love
Don't you want someone to care about you
What about love
Don't let it slip away
What about love
I only want to share it with you
What about love
Don't you want someone to care about you
What about love
Don't let it slip away
What about love
I only want to share it with you

She slid one hand up behind his neck and pulled his head down for a kiss. His lips were warm and soft as he gently brushed them against hers. He was teasing her, lightly brushing his lips against hers until she pulled him closer and deepened the kiss.

Both poured every ounce of feeling that they could into that single touching of the lips. Then, as it deepened, they lost themselves in each other.

They broke apart and looked at each other, passion darkening their eyes.

"Let's get out of here," Faith whispered huskily.

Xander paid the bill and they drove home in silence, holding hands and exchanging intense long glances with each other that spoke more loudly than words.

They pulled into the driveway, parked the car, then entered the house.

Faith disappeared into her room for a moment to remove her nylons and then reappeared, heading to the door.

"Let's go for a walk on the beach,." she suggested.

Xander followed her as she made her way down to the water. Standing at the edge of the gently lapping waves, she spoke, her back to him.

"Where are we going, Xan?" she asked softly. "I mean, I know I love you, and I think you love me, but where are we heading?"

"Where do you want to go?" was his quiet reply.

Faith walked out a little further into the ocean, letting the warm water splash over her ankles.

"I don't know, Xan. I've never had this kind of chance before, and I don't know what to expect."

"I didn't ask what you expected, I asked what you wanted."

Faith turned to face him, the moonlight dancing off the highlights in her hair.

"I want you Xan, just you," she said.

Xander stepped up to her quickly and picked her up, spinning her around.

"Faith, I have always loved you, it seems, and I want you, forever," he said softly before kissing her soundly.

The two exchanged kisses on the beach for several more minutes, until they were forced to break apart to catch their breath. Then, they started back up to the Villa.

Neither of them noticed several pairs of glowing eyes that watched them as they walked.

They entered the Villa and locked up for the night. Xander asked Faith if she would like a glass of wine before bed, and she agreed that it would be nice.

"Bring the bottle," she told him from the door to the bedroom.

Xander turned to acknowledge her when he saw her. She stood inside the doorway, and reached up behind her neck and untied the halter top of the dress. It must have already been unzipped, because it slid off her body with a soft rustle.

Faith stood there in all her glory, wearing only a pair of tiny black lace panties.

Xander almost spilled the wine.

"Don't be all night," Faith smiled at him, as she disappeared into the bedroom.

Xander grabbed two glasses, the bottle of wine and followed, shutting the door behind him as he entered the room.

TBC