Chapter 8 - Rachel
I flew to Cassie's. She had, after all, wanted to talk to me. I didn't really want to talk about that touchy subject right then, but she's my best friend, and I have to trust her to keep my secrets.
My bald eagle morph may control the day, but owl rules the night. Even the faintest glimmer of moonlight enables the owl to see everything. I mean everything! Every twitch of grass was processed in my mind as prey. I could hear the mice in their burrows eating seeds while I flew. I was king of darkness!
Whenever Tobias comes to see me, it's usually easy for me to let him in. My windowsill protrudes just enough to allow him to sit and perch there.
Cassie's is a whole different story. She had nothing to hold onto.
I forgot about that. I swooped, heading towards Cassie's window. Then, I realized.
AHHHHH! I screamed. Oops. Cassie, if you can hear me, OPEN THE WINDOW! I shot towards it. I didn't have time to turn.
I hit the glass. I grabbed at the thin, tiny slice of wood bordering the window. Talons grabbed! Missed!
A hand reached out, and with clear veterinarian experience, grabbed me and pulled my owl body through the window.
Cassie set my down on the floor. Breathing heavily, I demorphed. Slowly my owl body melted into my human one. I let out a deep breath.
"I owe you one Cassie," I said thankfully. She waved her hands dismissively.
"No prob. It's hard to fall asleep when idiot birds crash into my window at 10:30 at night," She grinned. I grinned back. Cassie walked over to her closet.
"Do you need some clothes? It must be freezing in that leotard. My mom and dad turn off the heating at night. You know, so we don't waste electricity that we could use to help heat or monitor the animals," She said apologetically. I gave her a sidelong look.
"Cassie, you're my best friend and all, but no. Do you even go shopping without me? Ever? What do I have to do to make you understand?" I said, raising my hands in defeat.
"Knock me unconscious, strap me to your mom's car, and lock me in the Gap. Then, when I try to get out, threaten me by morphing to grizzly. That's how." She grinned. Then her face turned serious.
"Rachel, about today...about you know..." I put on a blank face. Or I at least tried to.
"I think I'm okay now. I mean, I was just mad at Marco. That's all." Cassie gave me a look that said right away she disapproved. She sighed.
"Rachel, love doesn't 'go away'. It doesn't leave. It's always there. I know you care for Tobias. I know he cares for you. Don't avoid it... especially not in your head. I don't care how you act around Jake and the others, or even Tobias. Just don't pretend it's not there, okay?" Cassie looked at me. I blushed at her speech. I tried to think of a comeback. But this isn't Marco. This is Cassie, my best friend. I choked on my words. I felt like an idiot.
"Cassie," I said at last, "What should I do? I mean, somehow or another...you know...I mean, seriously, I like a guy that flies the thermals and eats rodents for breakfast. What can I do? I can't help myself!" I blurted out suddenly. I surprised even myself. Cassie lowered her head. Unshed tears glistened in her eyes. When she came up, I expected a look of pure sorrow. Instead, she was smiling happily.
"You care so much for him, don't you?" She sighed and grinned. I nodded my head slowly. Reluctantly. Even my emotions being said, I couldn't bring myself to be something less than a warrior. I was, after all, Xena.
"I knew," Cassie said suddenly.
"What?"
"I knew. You know, before the Student Awards when you were talking. I knew it was Tobias when you left the awards to see us. Nobody else could have made you that happy. Marco was right. You were never as happy until right then." She gave me a quick smile. I blushed again.
"That's not it though," Cassie said, raising an eyebrow at me, "You were, all weird at the meeting. Totally out of it. I know that Marco made some, um, unnecessary comments, but you still were gone. It was really creepy, you know?" She stared at me questioningly.
"Yeah. About that. Um, well," I blushed bright red. My face was on fire, "I, ah, kissed Tobias. Twice," Cassie stared. She didn't say a word. I started getting angry. I shook with rage.
"What's wrong with that? Huh?" I said defensively, "It just happened, okay?" Cassie looked at my angry, embarrassed face.
"Nothing. Nothing at all."
"Really Cassie? Don't you think it's strange that I care about a bird? That I kissed him? I don't know if you do Cassie - you're my best friend. But the others..." I took a breath. Cassie just shook her head.
"I don't think it's strange. And the others? Do you mean Marco? Well, don't let him get to you. He teases Jake and me almost every day," She grinned and leaned closer to me and whispered in my ear, "Shhh. Don't tell anyone, but I think he's jealous." She grinned again. I began to feel a bit better. I got up, yawned, and stretched my back. Cassie hugged me.
"If it makes you feel any better, just know you can talk to me, okay?" I smiled at Cassie.
"Thanks." I said gratefully. She rolled her eyes in mock annoyance.
"Anytime Rachel. Anytime." I began to morph to owl again. As I melted into the great horned owl body, I turned my luminous eyes on Cassie.
Oh, and Cassie? I said, You're coming with me to the mall after school tomorrow. No arguments. Cassie gasped in shock. Then laughed.
"Sure, why not?"
I flew slowly back to my house. I had no reason to go back home, since I told my mom and sisters that I was working on lots of homework and couldn't be bothered in the least. I sighed in my head. Lies came so easily now. I mean, what was I going to say? 'Hey Mom, I'm going to fly over to Cassie's to discuss some problems I'm having with a boy. What boy? Didn't I tell you? He's a red-tailed hawk. Surprise!' Yeah. That would go well.
I flew through my open window and landed on my unmade bed. I demorphed. Closed the window.
For a while, I just sat on my bed, my chin resting on the palm of my hand. Why I asked myself, why can't I live a normal life? Hang out with normal people? Why do I have to lie about everything? I shook these thoughts from my head. No use thinking that, I thought bitterly, my life is ruined anyway...
I picked up my pillow and threw it against the wall. It hit the wall with a soft plop and fell to the floor in a heap. My eyes followed it to the ground. I sighed again. That's my life. It was fun when it started. Then we found the Andalite and our lives crumpled. I shivered and threw off my clothes. I didn't bother to brush my teeth. Who cares? I might die tomorrow anyways...
I rummaged impatiently through my dresser drawer.
I finally found the shirt I was looking for. The Mariners. Even though I never lived in Seattle, I had always loved that baseball team. I shut my eyes...
"Come on, Daddy!" I said as I pulled my father's hand into my own. What was he waiting for? The game was about to start!
"Just a second sweetheart - yes, we'd like two tickets for the M's game. Thank you." He took the two tickets from the lady at the desk and grinned at me. As we walked hand-in-hand into the baseball stadium, Dad gave me a playful shove.
"Ready to trash-talk some umpires?" He smiled, showing about a hundred white teeth. I shuddered with excitement. He grinned.
"This is going to be great!" I said, skipping with joy.
Tap...tap...tap...
"Stop! The game's about to start!" I blinked. Stared at my surroundings. Where was I? Where was Daddy?
Tap...tap...tap...
I jerked my head. There was a bird at my window. My window. In my room. It has a pretty red tail. I should let him in. He looks cold...
I opened the window.
Hi Rachel, A voice in my head! Where was it?
"Who's there?" I squeaked, terrified, "Where are you?" I pulled my knees to my chest and rocked back and forth on my bottom. I whimpered.
Rachel? Are you okay? It's me, Tobias. Your friend, I sighed. A friend. Then I giggled. A boy was talking, I was sure of it. I giggled again, blushing bright red. A boy!
"Where are you?" I asked again. Then I noticed the bird edging towards the window. I leapt up.
"Pretty bird. Pretty bird. Don't go. It's too cold outside." I shut the window.
"There. Now let's find you a nice place to sleep, pretty bird."
Rachel! What are you doing?! What's wrong? I gasped. The boy again. I pouted. Why doesn't he come out and play? Why not? Why...
I gasped. Couldn't breath.
Memories. All coming back to me now. Animorphs. Yeerks, Andalites, Chee, Pemalites, Hork-Bajir, Taxxons... Visser Three, Tom...
Cassie, my best friend forever. Jake the unofficial leader. My cousin. Ax the Aristh Andalite. Marco. Funny Marco. Tobias the red-tailed -
"Hawk!" I screamed. I stared at the red-tail, my eyes wild and frightened. He began to morph.
"Oh-my-god. Tobias...Tobias..." I gasped for breath. Breathing heavily, I collapsed onto the bed. Eyelids closed. Can't hold them open.
Dizzy, weak...
Blackness...
I woke up. Not necessarily a good thing.
"What happen - Arggghuhhh..." I threw up. All over my clean bed sheets I had placed on the floor. Mom is going to have a fit! I thought. I tried to sit up. That was a mistake.
"Ahhhhhhh!" I screamed. A stabbing pain in my chest! It was on fire! I yelled and someone clamped a hand gently over my mouth.
"Shh... Rachel, it's okay..." I recognized the voice. I focused my eyes on the person leaning over me. Tobias! Thank god...
"Tobias!" I cried weakly, "What happened?" Tobias pushed some dirty-blond hair out of his eyes. He was white. And shaking. With fear?
I puked again, my insides heaving in pain. Tobias squeezed my hand tightly.
"Rachel, you passed out." He said, trembling, "You were acting all weird and then you fainted. You stopped breathing."
"Am I..." I gasped, tasting the bile in my throat and mouth.
"No. I, ah, had to use CPR. But, you lived. And you're alive." He clasped my hand again, "Good thing I took that class, huh?" He shivered. All of a sudden, he blushed bright red. He stared fixedly at my face. I looked at him, confused. He just saved my life. Why should he be embarrassed?
It's only CPR...
I took the course too. Last year. One of the only classes I never really enjoyed. Health. I didn't know Tobias was in my class...
I remember it perfectly. Step one, call 911. I sure hoped Tobias didn't call 911. He would have to explain what he was doing in my room in the first place. I didn't want to think of what my family would say to that, let alone the police. I went through all of the steps - tilt head to open airway, check breathing, give two breaths... oh. The compressions. That's what gave me my broken ribs. Then...
I too blushed scarlet. There it was, clear in my mind: 'remove all necessary articles of clothing on victim prior to attempting compressions'. Tobias had read the handbook all right. Blushing furiously, I allowed him to help me get my shirt back on. He looked at my face the whole time. Finally he spoke. Softly.
"You can morph; it'll heal your ribs. You'll probably still be nauseous though... you might throw up again." I nodded, causing my head to spin in confusion. Tobias stepped back a ways.
I began to change to bald eagle. One of my many favorite morphs.
Usually morphing doesn't hurt. This time it did.
The pain! Twisting, agonizing, searing pain throughout my body! Piercing my skin. A thousand knives! Twisting me, choking me, killing me... My broken ribs, which would have taken months to heal, fit together like a puzzle. After the last bone was in place, the pain subsided. I continued the morphing. When I stopped, I was an eagle. The nausea came with me. But, not really. It was weird. I didn't really understand it. It didn't bother me, not at a conscious level.
It was like, what sickness?
I wished I could've stayed in that body for a while. To settle down and calm my nerves. But that would've been admitting cowardice. And I'm not a coward.
I began to morph back.
This time, the morphing process didn't bother me. I felt no pain, just the strange, slightly disturbing feeling of wings melting into arms, beaks shifting to become lips, talons softening to become toes...
Tobias looked away. Blushing, I made my way to my closet and made myself decent. I felt like I hadn't walked in days. My legs felt like liquid, and my insides were threatening to heave once more.
"Done." I said simply. I breathed deeply. A layer of cold sweat broke out on my forehead. I shivered. Tobias looked at me, confused. I sat down on the bed and he immediately rushed over to help. I felt his arm around my shoulders as he guided my back to the bed. He slipped his arm from beneath my shoulders and set me down as gently as he could.
"Are you okay, Rachel?" He whispered over and over again. I couldn't talk. I closed my eyes. I'm not used to be so weak...
I licked my chapped and cracked lips. I drew a raspy breath.
"Fine." I managed to crack a grin, "Glad you're not Marco." I sighed.
"Tobias..." I coughed, "Get the others. Get Ax." He looked at me and squeezed my hand.
"But..." I glared at him.
"Do it. Do it..." I laid my head against my pillow. So tired. I felt like I had just done ten morphs without stopping and then sprinted five miles. Not to mention the fact that I felt sick to my stomach. Literally. I sighed again. So tired...
I heard Tobias get up and leave. The air outside smelled sweet and warm. Suddenly it dawned on me.
I was alone.
Chapter 9 - Tobias
I couldn't believe it. What had happened?
I used every trick I could muster with my fading strength. I gained altitude, dove, flew with the wind...
Why Rachel? Oh, God. Why her?
I flew about the rooftops, each small, but incredibly strong. My eyes, though not very good at night, could still see better than a human...
Was it me? Did I push love away? Was I a sort of jinx?
Too many questions. Not enough answers. I couldn't think.
Finally I reached the meadow. My meadow. I swooped down. I must have looked like a bird going on a kamikaze mission.
"TSEEERRR!" I screamed. Pure red-tail instincts now.
Ax! Ax! Wake up! Please... I landed above Ax's scoop. Sometimes I come to his "home" when I feel bored. It's pretty awesome. He has a T.V. Sometimes I think he's addicted to television. Although he still wonders why it's only two-dimensional.
My talons gripped the wood and I flapped my wings, restless.
Tobias? I heard a distant shuffling, and Ax appeared, his stalk eyes searching the forest. His tail was posed behind him, cocked for attack.
Ax, in the tree. He looked at me and lowered his tail, Listen. Rachel's sick. I need your help. She's cold, and clammy, and... I trailed off. Ax began his morph to northern harrier.
Tobias. I'll go find Prince Jake. Keep Rachel warm.
With that, he flew off. I shook with fear and raced back to Rachel's house. I had heard worry in Ax's thought-speak.
I need to help Rachel now. She needed me.
I had to help my friend. The girl who took a lonely hawk under her wing.
Chapter 10 - Marco
Marco!
THUUMMPP! THUUMMPP!
"Ahhhhhh! Who's there?" I sat up in a cold sweat, screaming. Okkaay... being an Animorph was really getting to me. I forced myself to move my shaking hands and wipe the sweat off my brow. I shivered. I looked around my room.
Marco, please open your window. I am slowly dying from lack of significant oxygen. I jumped up and shoved open the window and grabbed the northern harrier hanging onto my windowsill with one talon. Ax. I set him on my floor.
"Oh. No trouble then." I rolled my eyes. "You know, Ax, you've really got to tell us these things." I looked around. Where are the others?
Ax began to demorph. You think it's weird going from human to bird and back again?
Well, let me say this a nice way. You're wrong.
Bird to Andalite - and back again - is extremely gross and disturbing. And did I mention gross? And disturbing? I mean, who can say otherwise when you're staring at this perfectly normal bird when -pop- all of a sudden, extra eyes sprout from the top of its head? Get the picture?
I waited patiently while Ax-man finished his change. His totally disgusting, wrong... wait. I went into that already.
I had an Andalite in my room. Oh goody.
"Can I have your autograph?" I asked.
What is an autograph? Is it another primitive device that you humans use? I laughed. Ax looked at me again.
Is it tasty? Is it good to eat? I shook my head and rolled my eyes.
"Never mind." I sat down and crossed my arms, "So. Ax. Is there any particular reason that you are visiting me, or are you just bored?"
Ax paced the room, his sharp black hoofs scratching the carpeting.
Marco, Rachel is ill. We need to get Cassie and Prince Jake. Tobias seemed very worried. We must move quickly. The time is precious.
I was about to make a crack about precious time, but I knew better. Tobias was worried. And when that guy is worried, you'd better listen to him. He may be a red-tailed hawk, but he is extremely smart.
But, hey, grasp any joke when it comes to you. Use it. Quickly. It might get old. Nothing, nothing, is as bad as an old joke.
"Well," I started, "Of course Tobias is worried, Rachel's his girllffhgghhh-," I said as my mouth became the razor sharp beak of a great horned owl. Ax was right behind me.
I finished morphing.
Ready to fly? I spread my wings.
Chapter 11 - Tobias
I left the window open.
I knew I would have to come back. Rachel's strong, body and mind, but she can't do anything to cure sickness. Except wait.
Stop, I wanted to tell her, let your body do the fighting.
You can't do anything to make yourself better right now. You can't cure it now.
Especially when I haven't seen it before.
I flew into the room and immediately began my human morph. I thought back to Ax. How many Animorphs has he told by now? I hoped he was moving quickly. Rachel's life may be on the line...
I blinked back tears. Why me? Why?
I don't admire people who pity themselves and drown in sorrow, but this was way too much! Ellimist, why can't you bend your rules? Why can't you find a loophole? If Rachel dies...
No! I couldn't think about that!
I walked over to Rachel's desk and pulled out her chair. It was blue, like the sky. My sky.
I pulled the chair up close to Rachel's bed and studied her. She was still alive, for sure. Her breathing was short and shallow. At first I couldn't see or hear her breaths, but then I saw her chest rise and fall, rise, and fall...
That's it Rachel. Breathe. Live.
"Hey Rachel." I whispered softly. My voice seemed different. Unnatural. I saw the faintest of smiles. Rachel's eyes fluttered.
"Tobias? Is that you?"
"Yeah. I'm here."
"Don't leave me." She reached up to touch me. I grabbed her clammy hand.
"I won't."