2:07 a.m. Fulton's POV:
CRACK! The shock of the impact, combined with the pain, which was brief but intense as my entire body cried out at once, left me disoriented, and I floundered about, unsure which way was up. Strong arms grabbed me around the middle and hauled me in a direction that felt like downwards until I broke the surface, my head spinning as my eyes burned and my hair clung to my face in thick wet clumps, obscuring my vision. I struggled to fill my angrily protesting lungs with air, coughing and spitting out water as I tried to get my bearings.
"Are you okay?" Portman's concerned face appeared before mine.
"Dandy," I said sarcastically. "Are we finished now?"
"Yeah, I guess you're just not cut out for swimming, huh?"
"Gee, what tipped you off?"
"Oh, don't be so grouchy."
"I have every right to be grouchy. This was your idea, genius."
"Hey, it's not like you didn't make any progress."
"I can float and tread water. Big deal, I can still barely make it to the other end of the pool to the other, and your diving tips were a flop, so to speak." I gestured to my body, which had turned bright red from the impact with the water.
Portman giggled. "Well, at least it gave your pasty-ass skin some colour. You look like a lobster."
"Yeah, a lobster with rocks tied to his ankles."
"Oh, cheer up, you're not that bad." I looked at him, and he grinned. "Okay, you are, but who cares? If we're ever stuck on a sinking ship, I'll save you. Besides, your talents lie elsewhere."
Now that we were in the armpit-deep water of the middle of the pool, I was more at ease, and I laughed as Portman began to swim around me in tight little circles, eyeing me like a shark and tugging seductively on the waistband of the old cutoff jeans I was wearing. I glanced around me. No one was around. I'd never been skinny dipping before, but I figured this was probably as good a time as any to try it out. It was the middle of the night, the only time I would agree to swimming lessons because the other Ducks would all be in bed. Or so I thought.
2:19 a.m. Adam's POV:
"Sshhh!" I giggled as Charlie raced down the stairs ahead of me. "You'll wake the others!"
"Are you kidding? A nuclear war wouldn't wake the Bashes up!"
He was probably right, but I was nervous all the same. It was mostly excitement; when Charlie woke me up at two in the morning and suggested we go swimming, there was a glow in his eyes that I'd seen before. I knew he planned for this late-night excursion to turn romantic, and I was all for that, but I wasn't so fond of the idea of one of the Ducks walking in on the two of us "in flagrante dilecto."
"Relax, Adam," Charlie said as he opened the door leading to the pool and leaned against the doorway. "Everyone's asleep. We'll have the whole place to ourse..."
His voice trailed off as he saw my eyes fixate on something behind him. "What is it?" He turned around. "Oh shit!"
It looked as if someone had beaten us to the punch. Fulton and Portman were in the shallow end of the pool, getting it on like there was no tomorrow. Fulton was up against the wall, and Portman's legs were wrapped tight around his waist. They looked up at the sound of Charlie's voice, and the look of naked surprise on Portman's face would have been funny if I hadn't been so taken aback myself.
"What are you guys doing here?" Charlie asked in open astonishment.
"The same thing you two came down here to do, I imagine," Fulton said dryly, and it was then that I noticed two pairs of soggy cutoff jeans draped over the pool's edge.
"Charlie, they're naked, let's get out of here," I whispered, tugging on his arm.
"But...but..." Disappointment was etched across my boyfriend's face, and I knew how he felt. We weren't exactly what you would call wild and spontaneous; this was obviously Charlie's idea of a crazy romantic gesture, and I had been looking forward to it as well. We didn't do things like this very often.
"Forget it," Fulton said, grabbing one pair of shorts and tossing the other to Portman, who was looking decidedly displeased. "We'll be out of your way in a sec."
"Fult, you can't be serious! We--"
"I know somewhere we can go," he broke in with a smile, giving Portman a playful little pinch. "You'll love it, I promise, and we can finish what we started."
That quelled Portman's protests in a hurry, and moments later they were dressed and out of the pool. I handed them some extra towels, and as they left, Portman patted Charlie's arm and grinned wickedly. "Have fun, you guys. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Well, that didn't rule out much, did it?
"You know," Charlie said slyly, looking at me out of the corner of his eye as we walked hand in hand down to the deep end. "I think Fulton and Portman had the right idea. Bathing suits are overrated, don't you think?"
I turned to face him, and when I did I saw Charlie, the same Charlie who had swept me off my feet all those months ago, who had showed me what I wanted before I even knew it myself. He was something I hadn't expected; he wasn't part of the careful plan I had laid out for myself, and while that scared me, it thrilled me too. I needed a wild card like him in my life, something I didn't understand and couldn't control.
Things had been difficult for us lately, what with coming out to the Ducks and all, and we had been doing a lot of arguing. Charlie had already told his mother about us, and he wanted me to do the same, but I was stalling. I wasn't sure if I could tell my dad, and I didn't mean right now, I meant ever. I had never shown him the person I was when I was with the Ducks, Charlie in particular; I didn't think he'd approve.
For what felt like a long time, Charlie and I had been so caught up in what other people thought of us, that we had begun to lose sight of what was really important, of why we were together in the first place. Well, not anymore. I ran my fingers down my boyfriend's cheeks, and kissed him delicately on the corner of his mouth. I backed up a step, holding him at arm's length, and tilted my chin downwards, looking up at him in that way that always made him go crazy. Then I turned away, slowly stepped out of my red Speedo, and slipped quietly into the pool.
The water was a clear, light blue, reflecting back the yellow lights that lined the walls of the pool. I watched Charlie's distorted reflection as he fumbled eagerly with his swimming trunks and dove into the pool headfirst. He emerged right in front of me, his head popping out of the water like a dolphin. I backed up slowly, still giving him that look. I had picked it up from the actresses in those old black and white movies of the forties and fifties that I loved to watch.
"Come and get me, Mr. Conway." I was flirting like all hell, and it was working. Charlie swam towards me, his eyes fixed on mine, his mouth open slightly. He was practically drooling.
It felt good, being wanted so badly by somebody else, but it felt even better wanting them just as badly in return. Our faces were almost touching now, and I could feel Charlie's breath, warm and soft like a gentle breeze against my cheek.
Adam, stop, this is crazy. What would your father say? It was the voice in my head that always made itself heard when I was about to get intimate with Charlie. It used to bother me, but I was getting better and better at ignoring it. There was a part of me that knew the voice was right, that this was just going to complicate things and make my life difficult, but there was also a part of me that said screw it, that it was worth any price, just to feel the way I was feeling now. It was worth it, because of the way Charlie made me feel, not just about him, but about myself as well. He brought out something inside me, a fire, a passion, that I didn't know I had. He made me feel so good and so bad at the same time. My emotions were all roiling up inside of me and as I pulled him in close, I could feel the perfect little life I had been building for myself start to slip away, but it was replaced by something different, something better. Maybe there could be beauty in chaos, after all.
2:21 a.m. Julie's POV:
"But you still haven't told me how it happened!"
"To be honest, I'm not really sure."
"You're not sure? Who made the first move?"
"Well, I guess I did, but it was complicated."
"What do you mean? Why'd you do it?"
"I did it because he told me that he thought I was beautiful and amazing, and because I knew he'd never do it himself, and because I was as high as a kite... I don't know, I'm still pretty confused."
"Wow. But you're glad you did, right? Even the icing..."
"Oh, would you shut up about that already?"
"No way in hell! It isn't every day I walk in on four of my friends getting wet and wild with confectioneries. I still can't believe it, you and Kenny. Hey, we can go on double dates together!"
It had been several days since what Connie and the others had come to refer to as "the icing incident," and I was still trying to digest it all. Ever since Fulton told me about Kenny, I had been watching him, and the more I did, the more I liked the idea of making the sweet little Asian boy mine. I didn't know if I had subconsciously used the effects of the brownie to do what I didn't feel I was free to do under ordinary circumstances, but I didn't regret a thing. Had I really sucked on Kenny's chest for half an hour? I knew I was never going to live it down. Connie would tell the rest of the team, and Kenny and I would take the brunt of it, because everyone was a bit wary about teasing the Bashes, and besides, everyone was used to them doing weird things. I was dreading Averman and Goldberg's reactions in particular, but I was also secretly pleased. Everyone thought I was such a golden girl, it'd be nice to shed that image for awhile.
Kenny and I had spent a lot of time alone together since that night, but we hadn't done anything but talk. It was good, I guess, because I felt I was really getting to know him, but he'd only kissed me twice, and they had both been sweet little goodnight kisses. Frankly, I was starting to think I'd never get any action at this rate, and I thought I'd ask Connie, you know, to see if this was normal.
"Connie, how long were you and Guy dating before, you know..."
"He kissed me, I went down on him, we had sex, what?"
"The last one."
"Two and a half years, but we'd been going out since we were ten, so that can't really be applied to your situation. Why, are you worried about it or something?"
"No, just curious. Connie, did you ever want more than Guy was giving? I mean, Kenny's barely touched me and I was just..."
"Of course I did! Hell, I had to practically beg him to sleep with me the first time. He was so worried about going too far, that he never went anywhere at all. You know, Jules, there's nothing wrong with taking the initiative. You did it the first time, and it worked, right? From what you told me, Kenny's been crushing on you for ages, he's probably scared to piss you off. You need to let him know it's okay."
"You're right. Besides, who says guys get to make all the decisions?"
"There you go! Oh, and Jules, don't let him go around kissing your ass all the time. He needs to see you as a normal girl, not some sort of goddess. Idolatry's no basis for a relationship."
Damn, I had no idea Connie was so wise about these sorts of things. I'd have to remember to bring her any further questions I had.
Connie had got up from the bed we had been sitting on, and was leaning against the door connecting our room to Kenny and Guy's. She jerked her thumb over her shoulder and grinned wickedly. "Do you think our boys are asleep yet? Cause I wouldn't mind getting a little action myself, come to think of it."
I stood up and went over to join her. I guess I wouldn't be going to sleep anytime soon. Oh well. Look out, Kenny Wu. Julie the Cat is coming for you.
3:02 a.m. Fulton's POV:
It was the perfect night for stargazing; the air was cool and clear, and you could see forever. As Portman and I lay on our backs on the roof of the lodge, I took his hand in mine and pressed my face firmly against his, guiding his vision through the night sky with my pointed finger until I found what I was looking for.
"See that? That's Cassiopeia, the queen. She's sitting on her throne." I traced our fingers around the constellation.
"Oh, I see. Cass-ee -oh-pee-ah. Show me another."
I showed him all the constellations I could find; Navis, the magical ship Poseidon had left in the sky to guide sailors, Orion the mighty hunter, Draco the dragon, Pegasus the winged horse. The moon, swollen and round, hung low in the sky, and Venus and Mars were both clearly visible. It was a beautiful night, and I was grateful to Charlie and Adam for walking in on us like they had.
Portman and I loved to look at stars, and he was always pumping me for information about planets and comets and stuff. I thrived on the quiet evanescence of the night, it made me all romantic and philosophical, and Portman was affected in a similar way. Most of our best conversations had been held in the wee hours of the morning.
"You know," Portman began slowly, and I could tell immediately that this was something I wanted to hear. "Before I met you and the Ducks, I was happy. I thought my life was great. It was only at night, when I'd lie on my roof or look out the window and watch the stars, that I ever felt differently. It was the only time I wasn't more than satisfied with what I had, the only time I ever thought that there might be something better out there, that I was missing something important. Then I'd go to sleep and wake up the next morning and wonder what the hell I was thinking, but then you came along, so I guess I had it right the whole time, didn't I?"
I didn't say anything. When Portman got like this, you wanted to let him get it all out before he realised what he was saying and got all self- conscious.
"Remember when you told me that I'd be happy no matter where I was, or what I was doing, or who I was with? You're probably right, but I wouldn't be happy like this. There are different levels of happiness, and the one I'm on right now is definitely the best. I mean, if you died tomorrow and I was alone for the rest of my life, I still wouldn't regret a thing. It'd be worth it, just to have the memory of moments like this. Can you imagine what life would be like if we never met, if there were no Ducks? We'd be just like all those other people, the ones who never get to feel like we do, and don't even know what they're missing. I can't think of a worse fate, now that I know there is someone like you in the world."
A world without Ducks, without Portman? I shuddered, the idea was too awful even to think about. I fished around in my pocket; Portman and I had spent part of the afternoon teaching Julie and Kenny to roll joints, and I thought I had saved one for later. Success! I pulled it out and fired up, willing the thought of a world without Ducks out of my head. The smoke rose slowly into the air and quickly disappeared, and it wasn't long before it felt like we were doing the same. The rest of the world fell away, leaving only me and Portman, alone together under a great bowl of stars. Soon I could no longer feel the roughness of the shingles beneath my body, nor the cold night air on my face. It was as if we had left our bodies behind us and were riding the Milky Way all the way to eternity.
"I saw eternity the other night/Like a ring of pure and endless light."
"Where'd you learn that?"
"It's from a poem, I don't remember the rest of it."
"It's perfect, that's just what I was feeling. Do you know any others?"
"What, poems? Yeah, a few."
"Tell me one."
"Okay, as long as you promise to make me blueberry pancakes tomorrow."
"Deal." I tried to think of a poem that fit the occasion. There was one called The Learned Astronomer that I liked, but I couldn't recall how it began. Finally, I had it.
"I have been one acquainted with the night.
I have walked out in rain--and back in rain.
I have outwalked the furthest city light.
I have looked down the saddest city lane.
I have passed by the watchman on his beat,
And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain.
I have stood still and stopped the sound of feet
When far away an interrupted cry
Came over houses from another street,
But not to call me back or say goodbye;
And further still at an unearthly height,
One luminary clock against the sky
Proclaimed the time was neither wrong nor right.
I have been one acquainted with the night."
Portman didn't say anything for a while, he just smiled at me. "I like that," he said softly.
"It's Robert Frost, I'll show you some of his stuff. You'd like him, he's not like other poets; he doesn't hide anything."
"What did he mean about the clock in the sky, proclaiming things?"
"He was talking about the moon."
"It's weird isn't it, having someone you don't even know put words to these feelings you've had for forever."
"Yeah," I sighed happily, blowing a smoke ring.
"Show-off."
"Only for you, sweet cheeks. Want me to show you how?"
"Hell yeah!"
By the time we finally went back inside, it was near daybreak. We fell asleep on the Banks' enormous bed, and the next day Portman made blueberry pancakes for breakfast.
*I planned for chapter 8 to be the last camping chapter, but I just couldn't leave those storylines hanging like that, so there's still one more, though it is written in a slightly different format than that to which my readers have become accustomed. Hope it works! Faith, I did see the interview you mentioned, I thought it was really good, even though I'm not always such a big fan of our PM. Hey Kelly, did you catch the Vancouver Dallas game? Pretty sweet, huh? The St. Louis one was good too, up till the last half of the third. Rrr. Guess who my favourite player is? Could it be the guy with #44 on his back? The one who scored a hat trick against Dallas, the same one who can smash anything in his way and still handle the puck and stick deftly and gently? I think so! One more thing: Quimby, I have to ask, what exactly does "stoob" mean?*
CRACK! The shock of the impact, combined with the pain, which was brief but intense as my entire body cried out at once, left me disoriented, and I floundered about, unsure which way was up. Strong arms grabbed me around the middle and hauled me in a direction that felt like downwards until I broke the surface, my head spinning as my eyes burned and my hair clung to my face in thick wet clumps, obscuring my vision. I struggled to fill my angrily protesting lungs with air, coughing and spitting out water as I tried to get my bearings.
"Are you okay?" Portman's concerned face appeared before mine.
"Dandy," I said sarcastically. "Are we finished now?"
"Yeah, I guess you're just not cut out for swimming, huh?"
"Gee, what tipped you off?"
"Oh, don't be so grouchy."
"I have every right to be grouchy. This was your idea, genius."
"Hey, it's not like you didn't make any progress."
"I can float and tread water. Big deal, I can still barely make it to the other end of the pool to the other, and your diving tips were a flop, so to speak." I gestured to my body, which had turned bright red from the impact with the water.
Portman giggled. "Well, at least it gave your pasty-ass skin some colour. You look like a lobster."
"Yeah, a lobster with rocks tied to his ankles."
"Oh, cheer up, you're not that bad." I looked at him, and he grinned. "Okay, you are, but who cares? If we're ever stuck on a sinking ship, I'll save you. Besides, your talents lie elsewhere."
Now that we were in the armpit-deep water of the middle of the pool, I was more at ease, and I laughed as Portman began to swim around me in tight little circles, eyeing me like a shark and tugging seductively on the waistband of the old cutoff jeans I was wearing. I glanced around me. No one was around. I'd never been skinny dipping before, but I figured this was probably as good a time as any to try it out. It was the middle of the night, the only time I would agree to swimming lessons because the other Ducks would all be in bed. Or so I thought.
2:19 a.m. Adam's POV:
"Sshhh!" I giggled as Charlie raced down the stairs ahead of me. "You'll wake the others!"
"Are you kidding? A nuclear war wouldn't wake the Bashes up!"
He was probably right, but I was nervous all the same. It was mostly excitement; when Charlie woke me up at two in the morning and suggested we go swimming, there was a glow in his eyes that I'd seen before. I knew he planned for this late-night excursion to turn romantic, and I was all for that, but I wasn't so fond of the idea of one of the Ducks walking in on the two of us "in flagrante dilecto."
"Relax, Adam," Charlie said as he opened the door leading to the pool and leaned against the doorway. "Everyone's asleep. We'll have the whole place to ourse..."
His voice trailed off as he saw my eyes fixate on something behind him. "What is it?" He turned around. "Oh shit!"
It looked as if someone had beaten us to the punch. Fulton and Portman were in the shallow end of the pool, getting it on like there was no tomorrow. Fulton was up against the wall, and Portman's legs were wrapped tight around his waist. They looked up at the sound of Charlie's voice, and the look of naked surprise on Portman's face would have been funny if I hadn't been so taken aback myself.
"What are you guys doing here?" Charlie asked in open astonishment.
"The same thing you two came down here to do, I imagine," Fulton said dryly, and it was then that I noticed two pairs of soggy cutoff jeans draped over the pool's edge.
"Charlie, they're naked, let's get out of here," I whispered, tugging on his arm.
"But...but..." Disappointment was etched across my boyfriend's face, and I knew how he felt. We weren't exactly what you would call wild and spontaneous; this was obviously Charlie's idea of a crazy romantic gesture, and I had been looking forward to it as well. We didn't do things like this very often.
"Forget it," Fulton said, grabbing one pair of shorts and tossing the other to Portman, who was looking decidedly displeased. "We'll be out of your way in a sec."
"Fult, you can't be serious! We--"
"I know somewhere we can go," he broke in with a smile, giving Portman a playful little pinch. "You'll love it, I promise, and we can finish what we started."
That quelled Portman's protests in a hurry, and moments later they were dressed and out of the pool. I handed them some extra towels, and as they left, Portman patted Charlie's arm and grinned wickedly. "Have fun, you guys. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Well, that didn't rule out much, did it?
"You know," Charlie said slyly, looking at me out of the corner of his eye as we walked hand in hand down to the deep end. "I think Fulton and Portman had the right idea. Bathing suits are overrated, don't you think?"
I turned to face him, and when I did I saw Charlie, the same Charlie who had swept me off my feet all those months ago, who had showed me what I wanted before I even knew it myself. He was something I hadn't expected; he wasn't part of the careful plan I had laid out for myself, and while that scared me, it thrilled me too. I needed a wild card like him in my life, something I didn't understand and couldn't control.
Things had been difficult for us lately, what with coming out to the Ducks and all, and we had been doing a lot of arguing. Charlie had already told his mother about us, and he wanted me to do the same, but I was stalling. I wasn't sure if I could tell my dad, and I didn't mean right now, I meant ever. I had never shown him the person I was when I was with the Ducks, Charlie in particular; I didn't think he'd approve.
For what felt like a long time, Charlie and I had been so caught up in what other people thought of us, that we had begun to lose sight of what was really important, of why we were together in the first place. Well, not anymore. I ran my fingers down my boyfriend's cheeks, and kissed him delicately on the corner of his mouth. I backed up a step, holding him at arm's length, and tilted my chin downwards, looking up at him in that way that always made him go crazy. Then I turned away, slowly stepped out of my red Speedo, and slipped quietly into the pool.
The water was a clear, light blue, reflecting back the yellow lights that lined the walls of the pool. I watched Charlie's distorted reflection as he fumbled eagerly with his swimming trunks and dove into the pool headfirst. He emerged right in front of me, his head popping out of the water like a dolphin. I backed up slowly, still giving him that look. I had picked it up from the actresses in those old black and white movies of the forties and fifties that I loved to watch.
"Come and get me, Mr. Conway." I was flirting like all hell, and it was working. Charlie swam towards me, his eyes fixed on mine, his mouth open slightly. He was practically drooling.
It felt good, being wanted so badly by somebody else, but it felt even better wanting them just as badly in return. Our faces were almost touching now, and I could feel Charlie's breath, warm and soft like a gentle breeze against my cheek.
Adam, stop, this is crazy. What would your father say? It was the voice in my head that always made itself heard when I was about to get intimate with Charlie. It used to bother me, but I was getting better and better at ignoring it. There was a part of me that knew the voice was right, that this was just going to complicate things and make my life difficult, but there was also a part of me that said screw it, that it was worth any price, just to feel the way I was feeling now. It was worth it, because of the way Charlie made me feel, not just about him, but about myself as well. He brought out something inside me, a fire, a passion, that I didn't know I had. He made me feel so good and so bad at the same time. My emotions were all roiling up inside of me and as I pulled him in close, I could feel the perfect little life I had been building for myself start to slip away, but it was replaced by something different, something better. Maybe there could be beauty in chaos, after all.
2:21 a.m. Julie's POV:
"But you still haven't told me how it happened!"
"To be honest, I'm not really sure."
"You're not sure? Who made the first move?"
"Well, I guess I did, but it was complicated."
"What do you mean? Why'd you do it?"
"I did it because he told me that he thought I was beautiful and amazing, and because I knew he'd never do it himself, and because I was as high as a kite... I don't know, I'm still pretty confused."
"Wow. But you're glad you did, right? Even the icing..."
"Oh, would you shut up about that already?"
"No way in hell! It isn't every day I walk in on four of my friends getting wet and wild with confectioneries. I still can't believe it, you and Kenny. Hey, we can go on double dates together!"
It had been several days since what Connie and the others had come to refer to as "the icing incident," and I was still trying to digest it all. Ever since Fulton told me about Kenny, I had been watching him, and the more I did, the more I liked the idea of making the sweet little Asian boy mine. I didn't know if I had subconsciously used the effects of the brownie to do what I didn't feel I was free to do under ordinary circumstances, but I didn't regret a thing. Had I really sucked on Kenny's chest for half an hour? I knew I was never going to live it down. Connie would tell the rest of the team, and Kenny and I would take the brunt of it, because everyone was a bit wary about teasing the Bashes, and besides, everyone was used to them doing weird things. I was dreading Averman and Goldberg's reactions in particular, but I was also secretly pleased. Everyone thought I was such a golden girl, it'd be nice to shed that image for awhile.
Kenny and I had spent a lot of time alone together since that night, but we hadn't done anything but talk. It was good, I guess, because I felt I was really getting to know him, but he'd only kissed me twice, and they had both been sweet little goodnight kisses. Frankly, I was starting to think I'd never get any action at this rate, and I thought I'd ask Connie, you know, to see if this was normal.
"Connie, how long were you and Guy dating before, you know..."
"He kissed me, I went down on him, we had sex, what?"
"The last one."
"Two and a half years, but we'd been going out since we were ten, so that can't really be applied to your situation. Why, are you worried about it or something?"
"No, just curious. Connie, did you ever want more than Guy was giving? I mean, Kenny's barely touched me and I was just..."
"Of course I did! Hell, I had to practically beg him to sleep with me the first time. He was so worried about going too far, that he never went anywhere at all. You know, Jules, there's nothing wrong with taking the initiative. You did it the first time, and it worked, right? From what you told me, Kenny's been crushing on you for ages, he's probably scared to piss you off. You need to let him know it's okay."
"You're right. Besides, who says guys get to make all the decisions?"
"There you go! Oh, and Jules, don't let him go around kissing your ass all the time. He needs to see you as a normal girl, not some sort of goddess. Idolatry's no basis for a relationship."
Damn, I had no idea Connie was so wise about these sorts of things. I'd have to remember to bring her any further questions I had.
Connie had got up from the bed we had been sitting on, and was leaning against the door connecting our room to Kenny and Guy's. She jerked her thumb over her shoulder and grinned wickedly. "Do you think our boys are asleep yet? Cause I wouldn't mind getting a little action myself, come to think of it."
I stood up and went over to join her. I guess I wouldn't be going to sleep anytime soon. Oh well. Look out, Kenny Wu. Julie the Cat is coming for you.
3:02 a.m. Fulton's POV:
It was the perfect night for stargazing; the air was cool and clear, and you could see forever. As Portman and I lay on our backs on the roof of the lodge, I took his hand in mine and pressed my face firmly against his, guiding his vision through the night sky with my pointed finger until I found what I was looking for.
"See that? That's Cassiopeia, the queen. She's sitting on her throne." I traced our fingers around the constellation.
"Oh, I see. Cass-ee -oh-pee-ah. Show me another."
I showed him all the constellations I could find; Navis, the magical ship Poseidon had left in the sky to guide sailors, Orion the mighty hunter, Draco the dragon, Pegasus the winged horse. The moon, swollen and round, hung low in the sky, and Venus and Mars were both clearly visible. It was a beautiful night, and I was grateful to Charlie and Adam for walking in on us like they had.
Portman and I loved to look at stars, and he was always pumping me for information about planets and comets and stuff. I thrived on the quiet evanescence of the night, it made me all romantic and philosophical, and Portman was affected in a similar way. Most of our best conversations had been held in the wee hours of the morning.
"You know," Portman began slowly, and I could tell immediately that this was something I wanted to hear. "Before I met you and the Ducks, I was happy. I thought my life was great. It was only at night, when I'd lie on my roof or look out the window and watch the stars, that I ever felt differently. It was the only time I wasn't more than satisfied with what I had, the only time I ever thought that there might be something better out there, that I was missing something important. Then I'd go to sleep and wake up the next morning and wonder what the hell I was thinking, but then you came along, so I guess I had it right the whole time, didn't I?"
I didn't say anything. When Portman got like this, you wanted to let him get it all out before he realised what he was saying and got all self- conscious.
"Remember when you told me that I'd be happy no matter where I was, or what I was doing, or who I was with? You're probably right, but I wouldn't be happy like this. There are different levels of happiness, and the one I'm on right now is definitely the best. I mean, if you died tomorrow and I was alone for the rest of my life, I still wouldn't regret a thing. It'd be worth it, just to have the memory of moments like this. Can you imagine what life would be like if we never met, if there were no Ducks? We'd be just like all those other people, the ones who never get to feel like we do, and don't even know what they're missing. I can't think of a worse fate, now that I know there is someone like you in the world."
A world without Ducks, without Portman? I shuddered, the idea was too awful even to think about. I fished around in my pocket; Portman and I had spent part of the afternoon teaching Julie and Kenny to roll joints, and I thought I had saved one for later. Success! I pulled it out and fired up, willing the thought of a world without Ducks out of my head. The smoke rose slowly into the air and quickly disappeared, and it wasn't long before it felt like we were doing the same. The rest of the world fell away, leaving only me and Portman, alone together under a great bowl of stars. Soon I could no longer feel the roughness of the shingles beneath my body, nor the cold night air on my face. It was as if we had left our bodies behind us and were riding the Milky Way all the way to eternity.
"I saw eternity the other night/Like a ring of pure and endless light."
"Where'd you learn that?"
"It's from a poem, I don't remember the rest of it."
"It's perfect, that's just what I was feeling. Do you know any others?"
"What, poems? Yeah, a few."
"Tell me one."
"Okay, as long as you promise to make me blueberry pancakes tomorrow."
"Deal." I tried to think of a poem that fit the occasion. There was one called The Learned Astronomer that I liked, but I couldn't recall how it began. Finally, I had it.
"I have been one acquainted with the night.
I have walked out in rain--and back in rain.
I have outwalked the furthest city light.
I have looked down the saddest city lane.
I have passed by the watchman on his beat,
And dropped my eyes, unwilling to explain.
I have stood still and stopped the sound of feet
When far away an interrupted cry
Came over houses from another street,
But not to call me back or say goodbye;
And further still at an unearthly height,
One luminary clock against the sky
Proclaimed the time was neither wrong nor right.
I have been one acquainted with the night."
Portman didn't say anything for a while, he just smiled at me. "I like that," he said softly.
"It's Robert Frost, I'll show you some of his stuff. You'd like him, he's not like other poets; he doesn't hide anything."
"What did he mean about the clock in the sky, proclaiming things?"
"He was talking about the moon."
"It's weird isn't it, having someone you don't even know put words to these feelings you've had for forever."
"Yeah," I sighed happily, blowing a smoke ring.
"Show-off."
"Only for you, sweet cheeks. Want me to show you how?"
"Hell yeah!"
By the time we finally went back inside, it was near daybreak. We fell asleep on the Banks' enormous bed, and the next day Portman made blueberry pancakes for breakfast.
*I planned for chapter 8 to be the last camping chapter, but I just couldn't leave those storylines hanging like that, so there's still one more, though it is written in a slightly different format than that to which my readers have become accustomed. Hope it works! Faith, I did see the interview you mentioned, I thought it was really good, even though I'm not always such a big fan of our PM. Hey Kelly, did you catch the Vancouver Dallas game? Pretty sweet, huh? The St. Louis one was good too, up till the last half of the third. Rrr. Guess who my favourite player is? Could it be the guy with #44 on his back? The one who scored a hat trick against Dallas, the same one who can smash anything in his way and still handle the puck and stick deftly and gently? I think so! One more thing: Quimby, I have to ask, what exactly does "stoob" mean?*