Chapter 2

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They stayed in a hotel during the day because Angel couldn't drive in the sun. Dawn fell asleep from exhaustion and Angel waited until he was sure she was settled before doing the same. He panicked when he woke up and saw the bed was empty; if his heart could beat it would have been beating like crazy. She was sitting outside watching the sunset but her blue eyes were troubled and her face did not wear a smile. Angel almost went to sit beside her but then shrank back inside.

When night came they drove to LA in silence. The only question Dawn asked was why Cordelia hadn't received a vision. Angel didn't have an answer; the only explanation was that the Powers were too preoccupied but that wasn't satisfactory to Dawn.

Angel didn't press her with questions. He sensed she wasn't ready and that she probably wouldn't be for a long time. Dawn wasn't sure why she had taken Angel's hand and as they drove endlessly, she wondered what the point of her going with him to LA was. She had managed her mother's death and she had managed Buffy's death, although both times she had been close to breaking point. This was too much though, they had all gone at once and there was no one there to pick all the pieces up. She turned her head to look at Angel and he met her eyes. She looked away quickly and reiterated the thought in her head; there really was no one.

They drove through the night and finally arrived at the Hyperion. Dawn had never seen it and had never met Angel's friends apart from Cordelia and Wesley. Even then she had never really met them, only been given memories of them by the monks.

She shook her head "No, no, I don't want to do this now. No, no, I can't go in there. I need to be alone. Can you understand? Alone." In reality she knew she was alone but she didn't want Angel's presence everywhere she turned.

Angel sighed "I'll find you a hotel. You can have as much time as you want."

"I can find one myself. I have some money. Just go."

"Dawn, I'm not leaving you out in LA by yourself. It just isn't safe."

Angel realised the stupidity of what he had just said but Dawn did not react.

"I think I'll manage. I live on the… I used to live…" she didn't finish the sentence. She walked away from him for the second time.

Of course he followed her. She wasn't aware of him but he stalked her everywhere she went. She found a park, with flowers circling a pond and sprigs of daisies littering the grass. She curled up on the ground and listened to the earth because it seemed more real to her. She didn't actually have any money so she couldn't go to a hotel but she didn't care. Angel watched her sleep for an hour or so before lifting her gently into his arms and taking her to the Hotel. She snuggled against him in her sleep, breathing softly, her heart thudding gently inside her.

He entered the hotel where Cordelia was sleeping on the couch. He quietly climbed the stairs but Cordelia woke up with a start and exclaimed "Angel! Where have you been? We tried your cell-phone but…" Angel silenced her with furious shaking of his head and a finger to his lips. He turned around revealing Dawn to Cordelia.

"Oh my god," she whispered, "What the hell happened?" Tears were already forming in her eyes as she looked upon the shattered innocent girl.

Angel gave her a look that said he would explain later and took Dawn to a room on the top floor where she wouldn't be disturbed. She would probably despise him in the morning for taking her here and he didn't want to force her to meet people with questions and scrutinising eyes. He laid her in a bed and kissed her on the forehead gently and the reality of what had happened started to sink in making him groan. She moaned in her sleep and rolled to the side, eyelids fluttering delicately. Angel couldn't look at her anymore but he didn't want to have to face Cordelia's inquisition. He forced himself to get up and head downstairs where Cordelia was waiting hands on hips.

"Angel, What is this? Where did you go? Why is Buffy's sister sleeping in one of the rooms covered in dirt and blood? Is Buffy hurt?"

"Cordelia sit down."

"Angel tell me now. What has happened?"

"The First."

"The what?"

"The First Evil."

"It's coming?"

"It's been. It's gone, but it produced a large path of destruction whist it was here."

"Angel what exactly do you mean?"

Angel proceeded to tell her everything that had happened. Her face grew paler and paler as he spoke and she shook her head slowly. "Why didn't I get a vision? Why couldn't you tell me? I could have helped."

"I don't know Cordy, maybe the First had a hold over the Powers. I was a coward I suppose but I didn't want you getting hurt which was selfish."

Cordelia looked at him with a mixture of pain and disbelief, "Everyone is dead in Sunnydale? Buffy and Faith are dead? Oh my god, Xander too. But Dawn…how did she escape? Oh god, poor Dawn."

Angel nodded, "I don't know how Dawn survived but I found her alone away from Sunnydale and I brought her back here. She's pretty messed up as can be expected. She doesn't want to be here. She fell asleep in some park and I brought her home. She doesn't want to talk to anyone and I feel so helpless because she hates me and I don't know how to help her."

"She'll need time. You can't expect her to be acting like your best buddy Angel. She's lost her family and no matter how hard you try you will never replace them. All we can do is give her everything she needs and what she needs is for you to back off and give her space."

Angel looked taken aback at her words.

She spoke more softly, "You thought you were doing the right thing Angel and eventually she'll understand that. You were right to bring her here. Who knows what would have happened if you'd left her."

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Dawn woke up in a large bed with light streaming through the window and for a second, just a second, she forgot about reality. Then everything came flooding back and she shut her eyes to make it all go away. She realised Angel must have taken her here and she half hated him but half appreciated it. She put her feet on the ground, wincing as she lifted herself off the bed. Her arm must have taken quite a bruising in the battle and ugly red and grey splotches decorated it. She opened the door and was greeted by a corridor of identical rooms with a lift and set of stairs at the end. She went back into her bedroom and then turned on the shower in the bathroom. Hot water spurted out of the shower head and she gingerly peeled off her clothes before stepping in and letting the water wash over her. It stung her bruises and her tear stained face but it felt so good to be clean, to wash away the memories of the battle. Not that she would or could ever forget. Dirty water pooled at her feet before disappearing down the plug and she leant against the shower wall until it ran clear. Turning off the water she wrapped a towel around herself which Angel must have left and went to sit on her bed. She ran her fingers through her hair which was still tangled since she didn't have a comb and absentmindedly rubbed a red scar on her stomach.

Angel appeared in the doorway. "Are you ok Dawn? Do you want anything?"

Dawn did not reply.

"I'm sorry for bringing you back here. Actually that isn't true because I couldn't leave you out there but I'm sorry…"

"Angel you…"

"I'm sorry for going against your wishes."

"…don't have to be sorry. Thank you for doing this."

He smiled, apparently relieved she was responding to him. "I told Cordelia what happened. Don't worry, you don't have to talk to her but I had to explain things to her."

Dawn nodded. "I need some…Well my clothes are dirty and torn and I don't have any others." It hit her that she had left everything in Sunnydale; all the photos of Buffy and her mother, Buffy's stuffed pig which she had adopted, her entire life. She looked at Angel with a blank expression, "So I need some clothes."

Angel nodded, "I'll ask Cordy to lend you some of hers for now. Later…you can get some of your own…if you want."

Dawn wrapped herself more closely in the towel and shivered, her wet hair sticking to her shoulders. Angel stepped into the room to give her his jacket but immediately shrunk back as he stepped into sunlight. Dawn could have got up to close the curtains but she stayed where she was.

"Right, I'll go and find Cordy. Get those clothes organised."

Dawn didn't reply.

He paused, as if about to say something and then swept away from the door.

Soon after a voice called from the corridor. "Dawn, it's me, Cordelia. I'm gonna leave these clothes here for you. I hope they fit and everything. I can always go shopping tomorrow and get you some new ones." There was a pause. "Dawn I know you've been through hell and I realise you want to cut yourself off but I want you to know that you can talk to me at anytime you want. I…I know I'm the only person…apart from Angel who knows…but there's Wesley too…oh well I used to know Sunnydale which may make it even harder to talk to me but I just want to say that I am so sorry for all of this and that I will do anything to make it easier for you."

Dawn lay on the bed whilst Cordelia spoke, her eyes closed, listening to her heart beat. Eventually the 'lub-dub' of her heart drowned out Cordelia's voice and she lay contentedly.

"…So yeah. I'll see you later Dawn. Just call if you need anything."

Cordelia's footsteps thudded down the corridor and the 'ping' of the lift sounded. Dawn waited until she was sure she was gone and then went to pick up the clothes which were lying outside.

They weren't a perfect fit but that didn't matter. She realised she was hungry; a strange sensation because she hadn't had an appetite for a few days. She padded down the corridor and pressed the button on the lift. The arrow swung from left to right and Dawn stepped in. On the ground floor she came out at the same time as Gunn walked into the hotel. Wesley was close behind him. Dawn's initial instinct was to jump back in the lift and go straight to the top floor but she stood bravely on the stairs.

"Dawn? Dawn!" Wesley exclaimed in surprise.

She couldn't manage a smile but she nodded, "Hi Wesley."

She felt the tall black man staring at her which made her feel self-conscious.

"Dawn, why are you here? Not that it isn't good to see you. I heard that you were created to act as a human form of the key so we haven't really met have we. How decidedly strange. Well Dawn Summers it is certainly nice to meet you." He was scrutinising her now as well and she was surprised to want Angel beside her.

Wesley and Gunn looked at her, waiting for her to answer. She stammered "I..I..the First…" As if reading her thoughts Angel appeared from the office and went to stand beside her.

"Angel, you're back. Where did you go? Does this have something to do with Dawn being here. Angel you had better tell me what is going on" Wesley said in a quiet but demanding voice.

"Yeah Angel, where you been at?" Gunn raised an eyebrow in Angel's direction.

"Dawn do you want to go back upstairs? Cordelia's next door if you want something to eat. God Dawn you haven't eaten for days, you must be starving." Pure concern etched Angel's face as she started to walk slowly towards the kitchen.

"Angel." Wesley said less quietly.

"In a minute, Wes. Do you not have any decency?" Angel almost growled.

Dawn left Angel to explain things to the others. She wasn't ready to relive the experience for anyone.

As Angel had promised, Cordelia was in the kitchen but there was also a green demon with red horns. Dawn could have been scared but he was wearing a purple suit and humming 'the hills are alive with the sound of music'.

He caught sight of her, "Hey sweetcheeks, you must be Dawn. Angel filled me in on the nasties. I couldn't be more sorry, honey. You're not feeling too good are you." He could sense her distorted emotions a mile off. "I'm Lorne, honey, a good demon if ya hadn't guessed."

Dawn liked him and managed to turn the corners of her mouth up a little. Lorne flashed a grin and turned to Cordelia.

"Hey Dawnie. What do you feel like eating?" Cordelia spoke uncertainly not wanting to say anything that might upset her.

Dawn shrugged and sat on a bar stool, "I'm really not bothered. Maybe pancakes….Willow usually makes really good pancakes."

Silence hit the room as both Dawn and Cordelia tried to comprehend the fact that Willow would never make pancakes again.

"I'll see what I can do Dawnie," she said quietly

At that moment, Dawn heard raised voices in the foyer.

"I can't believe you would do this Angel. You didn't trust us. We could have helped save Buffy…and everyone." Wesley sounded incredibly angry.

"Oh come on Wesley. If Buffy and Faith couldn't beat it then you would hardly have stood a chance."

"We could have held off the numbers. We could have made a difference," Wesley's voice rose dramatically towards the end of the sentence. "We could have saved Dawn's only family. You think she's ever going to completely get over this."

Then Dawn assumed Wesley had hit Angel because she had heard a groan from Angel and a crash of furniture.

Gunn's voice had shouted "Guys, break it up, break it up, this is NOT the time."

Cordelia had looked at Dawn "I'm sorry Dawn. I don't know why they are doing this."

Dawn did. They were fighting because it was a way for them to mourn and understand. She followed Cordelia into the foyer anyway. Gunn was holding the two men apart but they had fixed each other with their eyes. He stepped back once Cordelia came in but they pounced at each other again. "Angel!" Cordelia's voice rang out sharp and clear. Angel ignored her and threw a punch in Wesley's direction. "Angel," Dawn whispered meekly, "Wesley, Angel, stop." They both stopped instantaneously and looked embarrassed.

Wesley moved towards her, "I'm sorry Dawn, that was completely insensitive. I can only give my deepest sympathies for…everything."

"Dawn, why don't you go up to your room. We need to sort some things out down here," Angel said firmly.

Wesley snorted "You can't tell her what to do. You've ruined her life more than enough."

They launched into a fight again and Cordelia threw up her hands exasperated, "Guys, stop it you stupid macho men, this isn't going to solve anything."

While they argued, voices growing louder, Dawn slipped past them and through the big entrance doors. No one noticed for a moment.

"Guys, look," Cordelia said pointing to the exit. The glass door swung back and forth and Dawn was no where to be seen.