PART III
Je te désire. / I long for you.


Different day. Different job. Buffy really liked her new job. The restaurant was nice and she was able to start immediately. She worked the late afternoon/evening shift. That meant Angel could sleep during the day.

They had argued late into the night and neither had slept until dawn. Her head ached and she had dark circles under her eyes. But she was here, and Angel was meeting her at the end of her shift. She checked her appearance in a mirror. God, I look ghastly. Skinny, pale, bony cheeks. I could almost pass as a vampire.

She chatted with the other waitresses while she waited for Angel. They invited her to a dance club to celebrate her first day.

"Hey, Anne, I think your boyfriend's here. And if not, my boyfriend's here." Shirley's eyes ran appraisingly over Angel's trim body. Boyfriend? Buffy looked up and saw Angel casually standing in the restaurant's entrance. He's certainly boyfriend material. "Where'd you find him?" At the entrance of Hell. "Don't suppose he's got a twin brother?" As a matter of fact, yes. Name's Angelus. "Anne? Are you in there?"

Buffy snapped out of her reverie. "I'm kinda tired. First day and everything. Maybe another time. Good night." She walked up to Angel. "Hey."

"Hey. You sure you don't want to go with them?"

Buffy glanced back at Shirley and the others. She missed dancing. Five weeks ago she was dancing at the Bronze with Willow. Two weeks ago… Two weeks ago I nearly sent Angel to Hell. A tall gawky man slid an arm around one of the girls and licked the outer shell of her ear before he swallowed her lips in a ravishing kiss. Angel used to kiss me like that. She watched the man slide his hand down the girl's back and cup her buttocks as he deepened the kiss. Buffy realized she was staring. She abruptly turned away and collided with Angel.

"Let's go," she snapped and pushed past him.

*****

Angel watched her march away. Buffy was obviously upset about something. He tried to think what it might be. She had seemed happy to see him. For a brief moment, she had actually seen him and not looked through him. What had changed?

Last night's argument had been about money. Buffy only had what she earned; Angel had plenty of money to spare. They didn't need to live the way they were living. And that, apparently, was the problem. Buffy refused any monetary support from him. She hadn't used the term "blood money", but the implication was there. This time she had threatened to leave. Angel thought she was too young to waste her life in dead end jobs. Buffy had made a scathing comment about "living with the dead, so what the hell difference does it make?" The argument had gone back and forth until the early hours of the morning.

Their arguments always left him drained. They never really made up. They just retreated to separate corners. In this case, Buffy had locked herself in the bathroom, and Angel had escaped into the night and the merciless pounding of a thieving Arach demon. When he returned just before dawn, she was asleep. Or so he thought until she whispered "Good night".

Buffy stopped in front of a store window filled with overpriced dresses and shoes. Angel stood silently beside her.

"That looks likes something Cordelia would wear. Although I like the shoes."

He squinted at the price tag. "Buffy, those shoes cost almost $200!!!"

"Yes, they do, don't they?" she replied dreamily. She sighed before moving away from the window.

Angel lengthened his stride to catch her. "How was your first day?" he inquired.

"Fine. It's a nice place to work." She absently peered into the shop windows as they walked.

"You sure everything's fine?" Angel knew she was avoiding something but he couldn't guess what it was. Buffy stopped and faced him.

"Angel, I'm fine. Don't I seem fine?" He was about to answer when Buffy cut him off. "Know what? I don't want to know." She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I know I'm cranky. I think… I think I'm just tired and feeling bleah."

"And late," added Angel.

"I'm what?"

"You're late."

"I'm late for what?"

Angel actually managed to look embarrassed. "Your um your monthly cycle. It's late." This was another conversation he didn't want to have.

Buffy opened and closed her mouth in shock. "And you know this how?"

"Vampire, remember? Highly developed sense of smell."

"Too bad it didn't come with a highly developed sense of tact."

This wasn't going right. "You're not pregnant," he offered helpfully.

Buffy spun away from him. "Oh this just gets better and better." She paced a three-foot line. "Do I want to know how you know I'm not pregnant?"

"Well," Angel realized that he was trapped. There was no right answer here. "Vampires can't have children." He managed not to look at her.

"What makes you think there hasn't been anyone else?" The words erupted from Buffy's mouth before she could stop them. She watched the pain dance across his face before his features hardened.

"Angelus would have killed him," the vampire spat coldly before he swept past her.

*****

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Buffy chased Angel for two blocks before she caught him. "Angel, stop. Wait. I'm sorry." She pulled on his arm. "I'm sorry," she repeated. "Please. Angel. I am sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

"You're the one that wanted me to stay," Angel said harshly. "Why do you keep pushing me away?"

I'm afraid. "I don't know. I don't want to fight with you. It seems like that's all we do." Buffy placed her hand on his cheek until he relaxed his clenched jaw. "Truce?"

Angel closed his eyes and savoured her touch. What he wanted to do was wrap both arms around her and never let go. He opened his eyes and turned his face to kiss her palm. "We don't need a truce, Buffy, we need to trust each other."

"I do trust you." Angel raised his eyebrows. "It's just a little weird to be talking about my period with a guy. Any guy. But especially you. I mean we've been …" she waved her hands, "close. But this is girl stuff and even if you weren't who you are I still wouldn't want to talk about this with you because you're a guy and you just wouldn't get it."

"I wouldn't get what, Buffy? That you're all mixed up because you're late? That you think you're pregnant? That you're miserable because you're bloated? That you've been living on chocolate for the past couple of days? What won't I get?" Angel's voice grew louder.

"How about a period for starters," Buffy muttered under her breath and spun away from him.

Angel's arms slipped around her waist as he pulled her back to him. His chuckle rumbled in his chest. "God, I hope not." He kissed the nape of her neck. "Are you like this every month?"

Buffy relaxed into his embrace. "Nope. Some months I throw things. Pointy wooden things."

"I'll try to remember that."