Title: The Logic of Risk Taking
Author: Chocolatequeen
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Enterprise is owned by rich people, I am not rich, therefore I
do not own Enterprise. How's that for logic, T'Pol? The chapter title is a
quote by William Morris, and the last line is a quote by Alexander Smith.
Archiving: Just ask, and make sure you send me a link.
Summary: After First Flight, Archer and T'Pol both ponder the logic found
in taking risks. There will be 3 parts, the first two are both stream of
consciousness POV's, the third will include dialogue.
A/N: I'm integrating the last paragraphs of the previous two chapters into
the opening of this one.
Part 3: Boundless Risk Must Pay for Boundless Gain
That resolved, she opened the door to her quarters and stepped into the corridor, walking towards Archer's cabin with a purpose she had never known. Taking risks certainly increased the single-mindedness in one's character, she realized.
At the same time, he became aware of the fact that there was really no question as to what to do next. There was only one answer-go ask her if she was willing to trust him again and take the risk of a lifetime. He strode to the door with more confidence than he felt, ready to march down the corridor and talk to her right now.
As sure as she was that she was doing the right thing, she was still glad the passageways were empty. This was a difficult enough mission without others wondering why she was standing outside the captain's cabin at 1:30. Wrapping herself in her determination, she pressed the chime. On the other side of the door, Archer's groan of frustration melted away into nervous anticipation when Porthos ran over to the door and started wagging his tail eagerly.
Unwilling to waste a second, he opened the door himself. "Come on in, T'Pol," he invited, stepping back to give her room to enter.
A quick blink was her only outward sign of surprise when the door opened in front of her before her finger had even left the chime. Raising one eyebrow, she answered his invitation easily. "Thank you Captain, but it was unnecessary for you to leave your seat to open the door. I am perfectly capable of operating the mechanism from the corridor."
He grinned, shaking his head at her precise phrasing. "I know you are T'Pol, but I was up anyway. Actually, I'm glad you're here. I was just coming to see you myself. He watched her closely, looking for any reaction. There it was again-a flash of surprise and maybe something more that was quickly blinked away.
"Was there something you wished to speak with me about Captain?" she asked mildly.
"T'Pol, it's 1:30 in the morning and we're standing in my quarters. Don't you think you can call me Jonathan?"
"If you have business you wish to discuss, it would be inappropriate for me to address you by your first name, Captain," she replied evenly, attempting to maintain some distance before she allowed herself to become vulnerable.
Shaking his head firmly, he replied, "I never said I was coming to talk to you about the ship." Mimicking her raised eyebrow, he waited for her response.
"Very well Jonathan. What was it you wished to speak with me about?" she repeated.
Before beginning, he gestured for her to sit down and then pulled up his chair so he was facing her. "I contacted Admiral Forrest when we got back. It will have to go through channels of course, but he agreed that the Robinson Nebula would be a good name. I wanted to thank you for thinking of it."
She shrugged delicately, a human expression of nonchalance she had picked up since joining Enterprise. "Captain Robinson clearly played a large role in making this voyage possible. It seemed only logical to name the nebula after him, in honor of his efforts."
"You're right, it is logical," he answered with a nod. "But I wasn't just thanking you for acknowledging what he meant to Star Fleet, I was thanking you for realizing what he meant to me and why I was so determined to find the nebula. Not everyone would have understood and it means a lot to me that you did."
"You're welcome, Jonathan." She hesitated for a moment, then decided this was the best segue she was likely to get. "I did have some more questions about Captain Robinson, if that is acceptable." Seeing his brief nod of acquiescence, she said, "Clearly the risks both you and Commander Tucker took paid off. Is that always the case?"
Jon looked up at the ceiling, trying to hide his anticipation at her choice of topic. "Of course not, or they wouldn't be risks," he responded, keeping his tone as measured as possible. "Sometimes you take a risk and end up worse off than you were before, but part of wisdom is learning to determine which risks are safe."
Both eyebrows went up at that remark. "I was not aware there was such a thing as a safe risk," she commented drily.
Laughing, he admitted the veracity of her statement. "You're right. I guess I should have said safer instead of safe."
Her brow wrinkled in confusion. "I do not understand. How can one risk be safer than another, and how do you discover how safe a risk is?"
Taking a deep breath, he gathered his thoughts before explaining. This was the most important discussion of his life and there was no way he was going to mess it up. "It's really a matter of using logic," he began. "It isn't difficult to determine the possible outcomes an action can bring, both good and bad. If the possible benefits outweigh the possible consequences, then it's considered a safe risk. The more the scale tips one way or the other, the better or worse the risk is."
"Could you give me an example?" she requested.
He thought for a moment before answering. "A Star Fleet captain leaving the ship unaccompanied is considered a poor risk. There is little benefit it can offer, and a lot of trouble it can cause."
"Interesting. I had not realized humans could be so logical about something that appears to be highly illogical." She pondered for a minute and then continued. "So when Captain Robinson suggested stealing the NX prototype, the risk to your careers was considered minimal because without a warp program-"
"We wouldn't have had careers anyway. Exactly, T'Pol."
"And then today you were willing to search for the nebula even though sensor readings could not prove its existence because there would not be any negative results caused by the search even if we did not find it."
"The phrase is, 'There's no harm in looking,' T'Pol."
"Indeed."
The ticking of the small bedside clock became deafening as silence fell between them. Jon could see T'Pol had turned inward; her eyes were no longer focused on him. Instead, she appeared to be staring at her hands, clasped together in her lap.
Finally, unable to stand the nearly palatable tension as second longer, he said inquired, "T'Pol?" She came out of her daze immediately, her eyes meeting his in silent question. "Good, I thought I'd lost you for a moment there," he said with a hint of relief.
The corners of her lips turned up the barest fraction of an inch. "I can assure you Jonathan, I did not go anywhere. I was simply wondering-" Her words trailed off and her eyes drifted back down to her hands.
Jon's heart skipped a beat and a knot of tension tightened in his gut. T'Pol had never left a sentence hanging like that as long as he had known her, the uncertainty it signaled was completely out of character for her. "Yes?" he asked quietly, bringing her back to him once more.
This time when she looked at him, the hesitancy in her eyes caused the knots in his stomach to tighten and then explode, leaving him with the empty feeling of being caught in a freefall. If she didn't speak soon, he had the irrational fear that they would have to peel him off the deck.
"I was hoping you would be willing to teach me how to take risks," she finished quietly.
Upon hearing the words he had been waiting for, he closed his eyes and allowed the wonder he felt to wash away every remnant of tension he had felt. He'd never expected this to feel so good. Opening his eyes again, he saw her looking at him with an expression that was half hope, half fear. Instinctively taking one of her hands in his, he regarded her seriously for a moment. "We're not talking about warp trials or nebulae anymore, are we?" he whispered.
Glancing down at their joined hands, she replied in a voice just as soft. "I don't believe so, Jonathan." Then with a light in his eyes she had never seen before, he brought her hand up and brushed his lips along her knuckles. "Why didn't I know anything could be so wonderful?" she asked, amazed.
His answer was simple. "Because T'Pol, everything is sweetened by risk."
Part 3: Boundless Risk Must Pay for Boundless Gain
That resolved, she opened the door to her quarters and stepped into the corridor, walking towards Archer's cabin with a purpose she had never known. Taking risks certainly increased the single-mindedness in one's character, she realized.
At the same time, he became aware of the fact that there was really no question as to what to do next. There was only one answer-go ask her if she was willing to trust him again and take the risk of a lifetime. He strode to the door with more confidence than he felt, ready to march down the corridor and talk to her right now.
As sure as she was that she was doing the right thing, she was still glad the passageways were empty. This was a difficult enough mission without others wondering why she was standing outside the captain's cabin at 1:30. Wrapping herself in her determination, she pressed the chime. On the other side of the door, Archer's groan of frustration melted away into nervous anticipation when Porthos ran over to the door and started wagging his tail eagerly.
Unwilling to waste a second, he opened the door himself. "Come on in, T'Pol," he invited, stepping back to give her room to enter.
A quick blink was her only outward sign of surprise when the door opened in front of her before her finger had even left the chime. Raising one eyebrow, she answered his invitation easily. "Thank you Captain, but it was unnecessary for you to leave your seat to open the door. I am perfectly capable of operating the mechanism from the corridor."
He grinned, shaking his head at her precise phrasing. "I know you are T'Pol, but I was up anyway. Actually, I'm glad you're here. I was just coming to see you myself. He watched her closely, looking for any reaction. There it was again-a flash of surprise and maybe something more that was quickly blinked away.
"Was there something you wished to speak with me about Captain?" she asked mildly.
"T'Pol, it's 1:30 in the morning and we're standing in my quarters. Don't you think you can call me Jonathan?"
"If you have business you wish to discuss, it would be inappropriate for me to address you by your first name, Captain," she replied evenly, attempting to maintain some distance before she allowed herself to become vulnerable.
Shaking his head firmly, he replied, "I never said I was coming to talk to you about the ship." Mimicking her raised eyebrow, he waited for her response.
"Very well Jonathan. What was it you wished to speak with me about?" she repeated.
Before beginning, he gestured for her to sit down and then pulled up his chair so he was facing her. "I contacted Admiral Forrest when we got back. It will have to go through channels of course, but he agreed that the Robinson Nebula would be a good name. I wanted to thank you for thinking of it."
She shrugged delicately, a human expression of nonchalance she had picked up since joining Enterprise. "Captain Robinson clearly played a large role in making this voyage possible. It seemed only logical to name the nebula after him, in honor of his efforts."
"You're right, it is logical," he answered with a nod. "But I wasn't just thanking you for acknowledging what he meant to Star Fleet, I was thanking you for realizing what he meant to me and why I was so determined to find the nebula. Not everyone would have understood and it means a lot to me that you did."
"You're welcome, Jonathan." She hesitated for a moment, then decided this was the best segue she was likely to get. "I did have some more questions about Captain Robinson, if that is acceptable." Seeing his brief nod of acquiescence, she said, "Clearly the risks both you and Commander Tucker took paid off. Is that always the case?"
Jon looked up at the ceiling, trying to hide his anticipation at her choice of topic. "Of course not, or they wouldn't be risks," he responded, keeping his tone as measured as possible. "Sometimes you take a risk and end up worse off than you were before, but part of wisdom is learning to determine which risks are safe."
Both eyebrows went up at that remark. "I was not aware there was such a thing as a safe risk," she commented drily.
Laughing, he admitted the veracity of her statement. "You're right. I guess I should have said safer instead of safe."
Her brow wrinkled in confusion. "I do not understand. How can one risk be safer than another, and how do you discover how safe a risk is?"
Taking a deep breath, he gathered his thoughts before explaining. This was the most important discussion of his life and there was no way he was going to mess it up. "It's really a matter of using logic," he began. "It isn't difficult to determine the possible outcomes an action can bring, both good and bad. If the possible benefits outweigh the possible consequences, then it's considered a safe risk. The more the scale tips one way or the other, the better or worse the risk is."
"Could you give me an example?" she requested.
He thought for a moment before answering. "A Star Fleet captain leaving the ship unaccompanied is considered a poor risk. There is little benefit it can offer, and a lot of trouble it can cause."
"Interesting. I had not realized humans could be so logical about something that appears to be highly illogical." She pondered for a minute and then continued. "So when Captain Robinson suggested stealing the NX prototype, the risk to your careers was considered minimal because without a warp program-"
"We wouldn't have had careers anyway. Exactly, T'Pol."
"And then today you were willing to search for the nebula even though sensor readings could not prove its existence because there would not be any negative results caused by the search even if we did not find it."
"The phrase is, 'There's no harm in looking,' T'Pol."
"Indeed."
The ticking of the small bedside clock became deafening as silence fell between them. Jon could see T'Pol had turned inward; her eyes were no longer focused on him. Instead, she appeared to be staring at her hands, clasped together in her lap.
Finally, unable to stand the nearly palatable tension as second longer, he said inquired, "T'Pol?" She came out of her daze immediately, her eyes meeting his in silent question. "Good, I thought I'd lost you for a moment there," he said with a hint of relief.
The corners of her lips turned up the barest fraction of an inch. "I can assure you Jonathan, I did not go anywhere. I was simply wondering-" Her words trailed off and her eyes drifted back down to her hands.
Jon's heart skipped a beat and a knot of tension tightened in his gut. T'Pol had never left a sentence hanging like that as long as he had known her, the uncertainty it signaled was completely out of character for her. "Yes?" he asked quietly, bringing her back to him once more.
This time when she looked at him, the hesitancy in her eyes caused the knots in his stomach to tighten and then explode, leaving him with the empty feeling of being caught in a freefall. If she didn't speak soon, he had the irrational fear that they would have to peel him off the deck.
"I was hoping you would be willing to teach me how to take risks," she finished quietly.
Upon hearing the words he had been waiting for, he closed his eyes and allowed the wonder he felt to wash away every remnant of tension he had felt. He'd never expected this to feel so good. Opening his eyes again, he saw her looking at him with an expression that was half hope, half fear. Instinctively taking one of her hands in his, he regarded her seriously for a moment. "We're not talking about warp trials or nebulae anymore, are we?" he whispered.
Glancing down at their joined hands, she replied in a voice just as soft. "I don't believe so, Jonathan." Then with a light in his eyes she had never seen before, he brought her hand up and brushed his lips along her knuckles. "Why didn't I know anything could be so wonderful?" she asked, amazed.
His answer was simple. "Because T'Pol, everything is sweetened by risk."