I walked along behind Akio. How did I let him convince me to go for a ride with him? A mystery. The mysterious Akio car loomed ahead in all its crimson glory. Almost crimson… except for a telltale dull silvery line running from the back of the car to the front.

Akio stopped in his tracks. "MY CAR!" He ran up and kneeled beside the car. "SOMEONE KEYED MY CAR!"

"Uhh, that's too bad…" I muttered. "Maybe this is a bad, time. We'll just go on that drive some other time."

Akio took a wavering breath. "This is fixable. I can fix this. It's okay."

"Err, Akio?"

"I'm fine!" Akio's voice cracked. "Get in the car!"

"Okay, but I'm telling you right now that I don't want to see the Ends of the World or the end of anything for that matter. Do we understand each other?"

Akio smiled.

"No weird costume changes…"

Akio smirked.

"No weird saxophone music…"

Akio chuckled.

"No jumping onto the hood of the car while it's in motion."

Akio leaned on the car door casually. "Just a short drive."

I opened the car door and sat down on the leather seat and buckled my seat belt. Akio went around and got in on the driver's side.

He started the car—or tried to. The car coughed and sputtered, but wouldn't start.

VVMM VVMM VVMM…

Akio made an annoyed face… and tried again.

VVMM VVMM VVMM…

And again.

VVMM VVMM VVMM…

"KUSO!" Akio moaned, letting his head slam down on the steering wheel.

HOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNK!!!

Akio smashed his fist down onto the dashboard… and we heard a KLUNK from the front of the car. The front bumper had fallen off.

Akio went up front and reattached the bumper… using a roll of duct tape he happened to have on hand. Meanwhile, I was still sitting in the car, waiting patiently, albeit nervously.

With nothing better to do, I reached absently over and turned the key in the ignition. The car started up and purred beautifully. Before I knew it, the car started rolling forward, with Akio still out of the car.

The car must have been going nearly twenty miles an hour and Akio was still chasing the car behind me. Wow… he's fast.

Akio dove—head first—back into the car. He got himself oriented and then began "driving," wearing the infamous I'm-dead-sexy-and-mysterious-to-boot smirk.

I sat, looking ahead, waiting for him to say something. Instead, he gave me a smug look and turned on the radio.

"~oops, I did it again…~"

Akio smashed the radio with his fist a couple of times until it began playing the Akio car theme.

I looked up from rummaging around in the glove compartment (stuffing maps and several assorted unpaid parking tickets back in). "You said no Akio Car music!"

Akio looked over. "Something wrong?" He smirked. His right hand reached over between the seats where the seat-adjusting levers were.

"Akio-san, what are you doing? I'm perfectly fine the way my seat is, no need to—"

KERCHUNK! Akio's seat flew forward a few feet, slamming Akio's face into the steering wheel.

HOOOOOOONNNNNK!!

"Ow…"

I stifled a giggle. I reached absently over and readjusted Akio's seat back to its normal position.

Akio straightened himself out.

Not wanting to make eye contact, I looked the other way out of the car.

"Akio-san, where are we? Where are you driving us?"

I looked over at him, expecting an answer. Instead, I saw him wearing that same sexy smirk, his hair now blowing free in the wind. In shock I realized that his clothes had changed! He was now wearing—

--a ballet tutu.

"Akio-san…" I giggled. "You look absolutely ravishing in pink!"

Akio looked down. A quiet growling sound could be heard. "Would you mind… looking the other way for a moment?"

I looked away. I could, however, hear Akio behind me.

*shuffle shuffle* *RIP* "Dammit!" *shuffle* *snap* *zip* "OW!"

"Okay… you can look now."

Akio's smirking face was no less than three inches from mine. He was now fully clad in that princelike outfit.

"…"

"Is this better?"

"Er… yes." Okay. Now he was getting really creepy.

Akio's right hand rested on the headrest of my seat. His left hand rested on my thigh—a little too close to a region I prefer to keep to myself.

"A- Akio-san…" I squeaked.

He leaned forward to whisper in my ear… I had scarcely felt his warm breath when we heard--

KRA-BOOM!

The sound of thunder signaled the beginning of a rainstorm. Rain began pouring down into the car.

I sighed in relief as Akio scrambled to put up the roof of the car. In his haste he managed to screw up the position of my seat so it moved all the way back and I was looking directly at the sky.

That's it. I'd had it.

"I'm sitting in the back seat."

"Go ahead!" Akio shouted back, him being too busy fiddling with the car's controls.

"Akio-san, my seatbelt is stuck…" I wiped rain out of my hair once Akio got the roof up. Pinned into the seat as I was, I couldn't even see Akio.

THUD! HOOOOOOOONNNNK!!!…

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Nothing!"

KERCHUNK! HOOOOOONNNK!!

"What happened?" I asked.

"Nothing!" I heard his voice say.

I lay there for a moment. "You tried jumping onto the hood of the car and forgot the roof was up, didn't you?"

"No!" Akio said indignantly.

"I'm ready to go home now."

Akio moved around to my side, bringing himself into my view (I noticed that he had a very large bump on his head).

"I want to show you something first," he purred.

"If you say 'Ends of the World,' I'll scream," I said flatly.

"Ri-chan…" He moved closer.

"Akio, don't you—AAHHHHH! Get away!!!"

He leaned forward to whisper in my ear. "Let me show you…"

"Don't touch me! I'll hit you!"

"Let me show you the Ends of the—"

POW!

…

Akio's sexy smirk faded to a frustrated frown. I had been just about ready to start pleading with him. I opened one eye cautiously.

"What's happened now?" I asked.

"I think we have a flat tire," Akio muttered. He groaned in exasperation and let his head fall forward—not onto the steering wheel, but rather onto my chest.

"PERVERT! GET OUT Of THERE!"

The flat tire began sending the car out of control. Akio flew forward—onto the steering wheel.

HOOOOOOOONNNNNNK!!!

"Ow…"

"You should have been wearing your seat belt!"

I heard the car door open.

"Where are you going now?"

"To change the tire."

What? The car can't change its own tires? I almost said it aloud.

Akio came back into the car about the time I had freed myself from my seatbelt bondage and readjusted my seat. His long lavender hair was no longer stately and flowing. It hung down, flat and dripping with rainwater.

"I'm having a bad day," he muttered.

"Can we go home?"

"As soon as I figure out where we are."

"WHAT?! You mean we're lost?"

Akio thrust his hand into the glove compartment and pulled out a stack of badly folded maps.

"Jeez, for Dios' sake, can't you even fold a map properly? I we ever get back to Ohtori, remind me never to take a ride from you again!"

"Here. Make yourself useful." He shoved a map into my arms and began driving again. "We'll be back at Ohtori before you know it, and don't expect me to stop and ask for directions, either!"

"Dios help me…" I groaned.

To be continued…