Fëanáro had wept in the gardens for he knew not how long. By the time he
rose at last, he was utterly drained, and his mind, which had been swirling
with emotions, was now empty. Completely empty. He could remember little of
what had happened, save only as a blurry dream. And he saw his life, from
his meeting with Nerdanel, and the birth of their children, and the love he
had felt for her. The love he still felt.
Only now he observed this as an outsider, and he saw how she suffered through it all, and how he had been blinded by the fire of his own soul, only thinking of himself. But still he could not understand what had caused her to begin to shun him. If she had not done that, none of this would of happened. It was her who drove him to hit her. It was her fault. And he convinced himself of this, and so at last would not humble his pride to go help her. He turned his back on their house and walked away. He knew not where.
Makalaurë came at last to his uncle Nolofinwë's house. Only then did he realize how late it was. Nolofinwë would be sleeping, and he would rouse him and everyone in the house, begging that they help the wife of his half- brother whom he hated. He could not do that. He wished he had Maitimo with him, who knew Nolofinwë and his sons well, being close in friendship with Nolofinwë's son Findekáno. Makalaurë hardly knew his uncle and his cousins since his father was loath to ever speak of them, never mind visit them. But this was an important matter. Moreover, Nerdanel was friends with Nolofinwë's family. So he resolved at last to knock on the door.
He walked silently up the white marble steps. The marble house shone dimly in the light of Telperion, which was now beginning to wane. He stepped up to the great doors and gently knocked. When no response came he tried again. Still, no one answered. He wanted to give up. He didn't know what he would say. Why was he afraid of his own uncle? But he had tried, and no one had answered. No, he hadn't tried, not hard enough. So he timidly pushed open the door, which was never locked, and stepped quietly inside. He realized then that he had left his house in his night-clothes! Well, it would have to do now. He stepped down the large, dark, empty hall.
After only a few steps, he was surprised to see light coming from the dining room straight ahead of him. He walked towards it, and was aware of two figures at the table, speaking with hushed voices. He approached them cautiously, but they seemed completely oblivious of his presence, absorbed in their own talk. Makalaurë recognized them. It was Nolofinwë and his daughter Írissë. Makalaurë knew Írissë because she would often go riding with his brothers, especially his brother Tyelkormo. Írissë seemed to be telling her father something that he found to be very important. Then, Makalaurë became aware that they were talking about his mother and father.
"Father, I think there is something terribly wrong. Tyelkormo has always denied it, and believed him until now. I would still believe it, if I hadn't seen Fëanáro trying to hit Maitimo. And Findekáno says that Maitimo told him his father and mother have both been acting strangely lately. There is something terribly wrong, I can feel it. You must do something!"
Her voice sounded urgent. Makalaurë had noticed his parents odd behavior, and his father's short-temper, but he had thought nothing of it. But now he thought of it, and he understood Írissë's urgency. He had dismissed the unhappiness in his family, going on pretending nothing was wrong, but now he could not dismiss it. For a moment he remembered how he had seen Nerdanel, lying on the floor, and he thought of his father and their frequent arguments. No. Fëanáro would not do that. He could not do that.
Makalaurë stepped forth from the shadows, making himself visible. "Uncle Nolofinwë" he said, quietly. Nolofinwë looked up, and if he was surprised at the sudden intrusion, he showed no sign of it. Írissë was a little more surprised, perhaps since she had just been talking of his family. "Makalaurë" she said, "What are you doing here?"
"I need your help" he began.
"Whatever it is, I will help if I can." Nolofinwë said. He had always been kind to Makalaurë and his brothers, even if he showed little kindness for their father. He had a right to dislike Fëanáro, since his brother showed him nothing but contempt for a reason Nolofinwë could not help: his mother. Makalaurë had never really understood his father's hate for his half- brothers and their children. The kind gaze of Nolofinwë set him at ease. He began his tale.
"I found my mother- Nerdanel -and she was fallen on the ground, bruised along her face. I tried to wake her, and she did not seem to hear me. I then went to find my father, but I could not find him and I suspected he was still in Tirion. I did not want to worry my brothers, and so there was no where else for me to go but to you."
A look of worry came over Nolofinwë, and he looked up at Makalaurë, solemnly. Then he looked at Írissë, his eyes somehow saying, "Alas that you spoke true," then he spoke aloud, saying "This is grave news indeed. Írissë stay here, and explain the news ot your brothers, should they awake before I return-"
"But I want to come!" She pleaded.
"No. You will stay here." The command sound eerily like Fëanáro's own voice, and Makalaurë saw the slight resemblance in the half-brothers. "Makalaurë, you will lead me back to your house, with all haste."
Makalaurë grew afraid. He had never seen his uncle in such a state of uncertainty and it frightened him even more. Surely, it could not be as serious as he made it sound? Makalaurë walked out the large door, Nolofinwë following.
Only now he observed this as an outsider, and he saw how she suffered through it all, and how he had been blinded by the fire of his own soul, only thinking of himself. But still he could not understand what had caused her to begin to shun him. If she had not done that, none of this would of happened. It was her who drove him to hit her. It was her fault. And he convinced himself of this, and so at last would not humble his pride to go help her. He turned his back on their house and walked away. He knew not where.
Makalaurë came at last to his uncle Nolofinwë's house. Only then did he realize how late it was. Nolofinwë would be sleeping, and he would rouse him and everyone in the house, begging that they help the wife of his half- brother whom he hated. He could not do that. He wished he had Maitimo with him, who knew Nolofinwë and his sons well, being close in friendship with Nolofinwë's son Findekáno. Makalaurë hardly knew his uncle and his cousins since his father was loath to ever speak of them, never mind visit them. But this was an important matter. Moreover, Nerdanel was friends with Nolofinwë's family. So he resolved at last to knock on the door.
He walked silently up the white marble steps. The marble house shone dimly in the light of Telperion, which was now beginning to wane. He stepped up to the great doors and gently knocked. When no response came he tried again. Still, no one answered. He wanted to give up. He didn't know what he would say. Why was he afraid of his own uncle? But he had tried, and no one had answered. No, he hadn't tried, not hard enough. So he timidly pushed open the door, which was never locked, and stepped quietly inside. He realized then that he had left his house in his night-clothes! Well, it would have to do now. He stepped down the large, dark, empty hall.
After only a few steps, he was surprised to see light coming from the dining room straight ahead of him. He walked towards it, and was aware of two figures at the table, speaking with hushed voices. He approached them cautiously, but they seemed completely oblivious of his presence, absorbed in their own talk. Makalaurë recognized them. It was Nolofinwë and his daughter Írissë. Makalaurë knew Írissë because she would often go riding with his brothers, especially his brother Tyelkormo. Írissë seemed to be telling her father something that he found to be very important. Then, Makalaurë became aware that they were talking about his mother and father.
"Father, I think there is something terribly wrong. Tyelkormo has always denied it, and believed him until now. I would still believe it, if I hadn't seen Fëanáro trying to hit Maitimo. And Findekáno says that Maitimo told him his father and mother have both been acting strangely lately. There is something terribly wrong, I can feel it. You must do something!"
Her voice sounded urgent. Makalaurë had noticed his parents odd behavior, and his father's short-temper, but he had thought nothing of it. But now he thought of it, and he understood Írissë's urgency. He had dismissed the unhappiness in his family, going on pretending nothing was wrong, but now he could not dismiss it. For a moment he remembered how he had seen Nerdanel, lying on the floor, and he thought of his father and their frequent arguments. No. Fëanáro would not do that. He could not do that.
Makalaurë stepped forth from the shadows, making himself visible. "Uncle Nolofinwë" he said, quietly. Nolofinwë looked up, and if he was surprised at the sudden intrusion, he showed no sign of it. Írissë was a little more surprised, perhaps since she had just been talking of his family. "Makalaurë" she said, "What are you doing here?"
"I need your help" he began.
"Whatever it is, I will help if I can." Nolofinwë said. He had always been kind to Makalaurë and his brothers, even if he showed little kindness for their father. He had a right to dislike Fëanáro, since his brother showed him nothing but contempt for a reason Nolofinwë could not help: his mother. Makalaurë had never really understood his father's hate for his half- brothers and their children. The kind gaze of Nolofinwë set him at ease. He began his tale.
"I found my mother- Nerdanel -and she was fallen on the ground, bruised along her face. I tried to wake her, and she did not seem to hear me. I then went to find my father, but I could not find him and I suspected he was still in Tirion. I did not want to worry my brothers, and so there was no where else for me to go but to you."
A look of worry came over Nolofinwë, and he looked up at Makalaurë, solemnly. Then he looked at Írissë, his eyes somehow saying, "Alas that you spoke true," then he spoke aloud, saying "This is grave news indeed. Írissë stay here, and explain the news ot your brothers, should they awake before I return-"
"But I want to come!" She pleaded.
"No. You will stay here." The command sound eerily like Fëanáro's own voice, and Makalaurë saw the slight resemblance in the half-brothers. "Makalaurë, you will lead me back to your house, with all haste."
Makalaurë grew afraid. He had never seen his uncle in such a state of uncertainty and it frightened him even more. Surely, it could not be as serious as he made it sound? Makalaurë walked out the large door, Nolofinwë following.