Chapter 6
Carter paced up and down the staff lounge. He didn't know why he was so nervous. Kyle wasn't even anything to do with him; he wasn't even that close to his mother. He stopped and glanced over at Cleo who was sitting perfectly still on one of the chairs by the window, biting her nails and staring into space.
Carter walked over and sat down next to her. She looked up, registering that he was there and went back to staring at the wall. "I should be there" she stammered, "He needs me."
Carter placed a hand on her shoulder. "You heard what Kerry said. She'll come and tell you when they know more."
Cleo looked up at Carter, looking for comfort. "You saw him, Carter. You saw how bad he was. He could die. Oh god, what if he's already dead?"
"Hey." Carter stopped her, "don't think like that, he'll be fine, you know that. Don't blame yourself."
"But I wasn't there. I left him with that woman. I trusted her. It was my bad judgement that got him hurt."
Carter opened his mouth to say something but was stopped when the lounge door opened. Kerry slowly opened the door and walked inside. Cleo swung around in her chair and looked up worryingly. Her tears had just about subsided as she sunk into numb shock but now they were once again pricking the backs of her eyes.
"Cleo, he's stable." Kerry came in and shut the door, immediately putting Cleo's mind at rest, preventing her from getting even more worried.
An overwhelming sense of relief swept over Cleo at Kerry's words but the sombre expression still on Dr. Weaver's face made her panic all over again.
Kerry took a deep breath and carried on. "He suffered major head trauma and massive internal bleeding. We had to open his chest down here to prevent further blood loss. He was down for a few minutes but we managed to get him back. Dr. Romano is on his way to take him up to surgery."
Cleo covered her mouth with her hands and stood there, silently shaking her head as this news sunk in. Kerry looked at her with sympathy and concern. Her instinct was to tell her not to worry, that everything was going to be fine but this wasn't like talking to any normal parent. Cleo was aware of all the risks and knew full well that his condition was critical.
Carter spoke up for the first time since Kerry had entered the room. "Can she see him?"
Kerry nodded her head slowly. "We've still got a few minutes until he goes upstairs, you can sit with him until then."
Cleo numbly made her way over to the door and turned the handle. Carter stood up and started walking over too but Kerry gestured for him to sit down again. "I really think it's best if she sees him on her own."
Carter nodded in understanding and sat back down. "I better get back to work. It looks like we're really filling up out there."
Kerry smiled at him and led Cleo out into the hall. Cleo was only vaguely aware that everyone was looking at them as they made their way to Trauma 2, but it didn't matter.
"Will everyone get on with their jobs please?" Kerry yelled. "Thank you."
Both doctors stopped just before they got to the trauma room. "Cleo, be aware that there will be lots of tubes and wires attached to him, and his chest is open. If it's to distressing for you, you don't have to go in."
Cleo lifted her head and looked at Kerry. "No, I need to see him." Kerry nodded and led the way through the doors.
Cleo felt more tears run down her face at the scene but all she could focus on was being there for her baby. She walked around to the other side of the table as Kerry stood by the door and a nurse rushed around, trying to clear up.
"Kyle, Mommy's here." She crouched down so she was at the same height as the table and ran her hand down his face. "Can you hear me? I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." Cleo leant over and kissed the top of his head. She gave a half-hearted smile and stood up just as Dr. Romano and a team of nurses burst though the doors. Kerry stopped him and pulled him to one side, no doubt telling him the situation. He looked shocked for a moment then nodded his head.
He walked over to Cleo, as the nurse got ready to take Kyle up to the OR. "Dr. Finch, we're talking him upstairs now, if you would like to follow me, I'll explain the situation on the way."
He gave her a sympathetic smile and Cleo nodded in reply. She walked slowly behind as they rushed Kyle to the elevator and wheeled him inside.
* * *
"Hey, how is he doing?" Carter walked up to Cleo in the surgical corridor and sat down next to her on the bench.
"I, umm. I don't know." She shook her head and looked nervously at the door into OR 1. "There's no news yet" she told him, "Romano's still operating."
Carter nodded. He placed a hand comfortingly on her shoulder. "And how are you feeling?"
Cleo shrugged. "Just numb. I can't believe this is happening."
Carter didn't say anything, he just listened. He couldn't imagine how she was feeling, he didn't pretend he did. There wasn't anything he could say so he didn't try.
"Three days ago I wasn't even his mother, now this." Cleo rested her head in her hands and a began to cry.
"You've always been his mother" Carter reassured her, "Just because he wasn't living with you, doesn't mean he wasn't a part of you."
"You have no idea" she said, not lifting her head. "You don't know how I acted."
"That doesn't matter either. The important thing is that you're looking after him now."
"And a great job I'm doing of it so far" Cleo said with a pained laugh. She lifted her head and looked Carter straight in the eye. "I love him so much. I just couldn't care for him. I thought it would be best to stay away."
"Did you ever stop thinking about him?"
A single tear slid down her cheek. "God no."
* * *
"Look Reese, we're home again." Peter smiled at his son and pointed out of the window of the cab as they pulled up outside the hospital. "Let's go and see Cleo, ok?"
Reese nodded wildly as Peter finished sighing. He paid the driver the fare from the airport and lifted Reese out, swinging their bag over his shoulder.
He walked up to the double doors and they slid open.
"Dr. Benton" Abby greeted glumly.
"Hi" he said back, more than a bit confused. "Where's Cleo?"
Malucci turned around to face Abby. They looked at each other. "She didn't call you?" He asked.
"About what?"
"Kyle was in a car accident, I would've thought she'd what you with her." Malucci said, picking up a pile of paper work, oblivious to the look of shock on Peter's face.
Benton looked at the resident with a questioning glance. "Who's Kyle?"
"Oh, god!" Abby said, turning away. "You didn't know. Kyle's her son."
Carter paced up and down the staff lounge. He didn't know why he was so nervous. Kyle wasn't even anything to do with him; he wasn't even that close to his mother. He stopped and glanced over at Cleo who was sitting perfectly still on one of the chairs by the window, biting her nails and staring into space.
Carter walked over and sat down next to her. She looked up, registering that he was there and went back to staring at the wall. "I should be there" she stammered, "He needs me."
Carter placed a hand on her shoulder. "You heard what Kerry said. She'll come and tell you when they know more."
Cleo looked up at Carter, looking for comfort. "You saw him, Carter. You saw how bad he was. He could die. Oh god, what if he's already dead?"
"Hey." Carter stopped her, "don't think like that, he'll be fine, you know that. Don't blame yourself."
"But I wasn't there. I left him with that woman. I trusted her. It was my bad judgement that got him hurt."
Carter opened his mouth to say something but was stopped when the lounge door opened. Kerry slowly opened the door and walked inside. Cleo swung around in her chair and looked up worryingly. Her tears had just about subsided as she sunk into numb shock but now they were once again pricking the backs of her eyes.
"Cleo, he's stable." Kerry came in and shut the door, immediately putting Cleo's mind at rest, preventing her from getting even more worried.
An overwhelming sense of relief swept over Cleo at Kerry's words but the sombre expression still on Dr. Weaver's face made her panic all over again.
Kerry took a deep breath and carried on. "He suffered major head trauma and massive internal bleeding. We had to open his chest down here to prevent further blood loss. He was down for a few minutes but we managed to get him back. Dr. Romano is on his way to take him up to surgery."
Cleo covered her mouth with her hands and stood there, silently shaking her head as this news sunk in. Kerry looked at her with sympathy and concern. Her instinct was to tell her not to worry, that everything was going to be fine but this wasn't like talking to any normal parent. Cleo was aware of all the risks and knew full well that his condition was critical.
Carter spoke up for the first time since Kerry had entered the room. "Can she see him?"
Kerry nodded her head slowly. "We've still got a few minutes until he goes upstairs, you can sit with him until then."
Cleo numbly made her way over to the door and turned the handle. Carter stood up and started walking over too but Kerry gestured for him to sit down again. "I really think it's best if she sees him on her own."
Carter nodded in understanding and sat back down. "I better get back to work. It looks like we're really filling up out there."
Kerry smiled at him and led Cleo out into the hall. Cleo was only vaguely aware that everyone was looking at them as they made their way to Trauma 2, but it didn't matter.
"Will everyone get on with their jobs please?" Kerry yelled. "Thank you."
Both doctors stopped just before they got to the trauma room. "Cleo, be aware that there will be lots of tubes and wires attached to him, and his chest is open. If it's to distressing for you, you don't have to go in."
Cleo lifted her head and looked at Kerry. "No, I need to see him." Kerry nodded and led the way through the doors.
Cleo felt more tears run down her face at the scene but all she could focus on was being there for her baby. She walked around to the other side of the table as Kerry stood by the door and a nurse rushed around, trying to clear up.
"Kyle, Mommy's here." She crouched down so she was at the same height as the table and ran her hand down his face. "Can you hear me? I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." Cleo leant over and kissed the top of his head. She gave a half-hearted smile and stood up just as Dr. Romano and a team of nurses burst though the doors. Kerry stopped him and pulled him to one side, no doubt telling him the situation. He looked shocked for a moment then nodded his head.
He walked over to Cleo, as the nurse got ready to take Kyle up to the OR. "Dr. Finch, we're talking him upstairs now, if you would like to follow me, I'll explain the situation on the way."
He gave her a sympathetic smile and Cleo nodded in reply. She walked slowly behind as they rushed Kyle to the elevator and wheeled him inside.
* * *
"Hey, how is he doing?" Carter walked up to Cleo in the surgical corridor and sat down next to her on the bench.
"I, umm. I don't know." She shook her head and looked nervously at the door into OR 1. "There's no news yet" she told him, "Romano's still operating."
Carter nodded. He placed a hand comfortingly on her shoulder. "And how are you feeling?"
Cleo shrugged. "Just numb. I can't believe this is happening."
Carter didn't say anything, he just listened. He couldn't imagine how she was feeling, he didn't pretend he did. There wasn't anything he could say so he didn't try.
"Three days ago I wasn't even his mother, now this." Cleo rested her head in her hands and a began to cry.
"You've always been his mother" Carter reassured her, "Just because he wasn't living with you, doesn't mean he wasn't a part of you."
"You have no idea" she said, not lifting her head. "You don't know how I acted."
"That doesn't matter either. The important thing is that you're looking after him now."
"And a great job I'm doing of it so far" Cleo said with a pained laugh. She lifted her head and looked Carter straight in the eye. "I love him so much. I just couldn't care for him. I thought it would be best to stay away."
"Did you ever stop thinking about him?"
A single tear slid down her cheek. "God no."
* * *
"Look Reese, we're home again." Peter smiled at his son and pointed out of the window of the cab as they pulled up outside the hospital. "Let's go and see Cleo, ok?"
Reese nodded wildly as Peter finished sighing. He paid the driver the fare from the airport and lifted Reese out, swinging their bag over his shoulder.
He walked up to the double doors and they slid open.
"Dr. Benton" Abby greeted glumly.
"Hi" he said back, more than a bit confused. "Where's Cleo?"
Malucci turned around to face Abby. They looked at each other. "She didn't call you?" He asked.
"About what?"
"Kyle was in a car accident, I would've thought she'd what you with her." Malucci said, picking up a pile of paper work, oblivious to the look of shock on Peter's face.
Benton looked at the resident with a questioning glance. "Who's Kyle?"
"Oh, god!" Abby said, turning away. "You didn't know. Kyle's her son."