"Who is this… Ror?"
"Wow. Good guess."
"Wow, its been… a long time."
"Yea. Guess it has."
"How have you been?"
"To be honest, not to hot Brad." Saying his name made her shiver, why did it have that sort of effect on her? She had read the diary, she knew what went on. But actually saying his name made her body tremble like it knew what was going on, even though her mind didn't.
"How come? Is everything OK?"
"Not really. To make a long story short, I was in a car accident. I had my memory of the last few years knocked right out of me. Not knowing it was a blessing in disguise, I decided to dig up the past and guess what Brad? I found my journal. The one that explains how YOU hit me and how YOU obviously didn't care about me. You see, then I might have not been strong enough to say anything back to you, or I might have just been to scared. Now I'm not. What do you have to say for yourself?"
"Rory… I don't know what to say. When we broke up a while ago, I went and got help. Now I'm under control, I know how to manage my anger and I'm all better Rory, I swear it. I was going to call you, next week, when I ended my regular therapy sessions and tell you in hopes you would consider another shot at our relationship. It would be a new, healthy, relationship where everything is under control. I don't want you to rush into anything… I just want you to understand. Read the good entries Rory, I promise you that you were happy with me, and you can be again. I can make it work."
Rory sat, in disbelief. Something about his voice made her long for him, for who he used to be and for who he had become. Something had taken over her, wanting to know everything she possibly could about her past. She didn't want to miss out on anything, she wanted everything she knew back in her mind where it belonged, so she made an offer.
"Then show me." She blurted out.
"Show you?" He asked, obviously confused by her uncharacteristic way of showing some sort of pity on him.
"Now. Come over now, and show me how you can make things better. We are NOT doing anything physically, and I'm taking a big step here by trying this. Don't think its all for you either, I just hope maybe you can help me remember some things about my past. I mean, if I spent so much time with you, then you've got to know something others don't."
Brad smiled on the other end of the phone, obviously ecstatic about the fact that Rory might take him back. Then he quickly thought of Lorelai, and Jess, and especially Luke.
"I would," he stuttered, "but nobody really likes me there. Jess, Luke, and definatly not you Mom. I mean, I hit you Rory. I'm not going to deny it, since part of my problem was just that - always denying it. But I'm changed Rory, and I do want to make it up to you."
Rory had a gut feeling not to do this, not to invite him over. She knew it was wrong in everyway possible, but damn it, Rory wanted more than anything to start remembering her past. And if Brad had been going to therapy, well, then everything should go just fine. She only planned on inviting him over for a few minutes anyway, and definatly before her Mom got home. Once more, the gut feeling to call of the whole meeting hit her intensely, but again she shoved the feeling aside.
"No body's here, but you still should come through my window. Brad… don't screw this up. In my diary your one shitty guy but I'm giving you another chance. We ARENT getting back together, I just want to know some things."
At that, Brads smile quickly faded into frown and his eyebrows dropped. An envious expression crossed his face as he asked Rory the fateful question, "Your with that asshole Jess. Aren't you?" Rory was taken by surprise at this, figuring Brad had known.
"Yea, I am. Well, kinda. I don't know, its weird… please, just get over here before I change my mind Ok?"
Brad made a noise into the phone that Rory took as a yes, and then slammed it down. "Ha, therapy sessions, what a friggin retard," Brad mumbled to himself, looking at the pictures all over his room of Rory and him. "I cant believe she's with Jess. We could have been perfect together…" his hands slowly reached the close up picture of Rory's face and he touched her 'cheek' with his fingers, gently massaging it. "But I blew it." he said, quickly changed the soft, gentle touch on Rory's face to a quick yet forceful punch into the wall. "If I cant have her, nobody can." Brad changed his clothes in an attempt to look nice, and gelled his hair.
Then he grabbed his backpack, got on his shoes and made his way out the door, "Mom!!" he yelled, "I'm going to… the library!"
"Whatever!" His Mom called back, putting her beer in the air to signal she heard him.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Rory paced around her room, then caught sight of the window and unlocked the lock. "What the hell was I thinking!" she said to herself, quickly locking the lock again. "No, I want him here…" she unlocked the window and stepped backwards two steps. Then, just as quickly she lunged for the window and locked it again. "Dammit!" she yelled, slamming her fists on the window sill. If this is what she wanted, why was she having such a hard time follow through with it? She KNEW it was wrong already, she knew before she even invited him. But now it seemed much more wrong, like she had really done something stupid. She wished with all her might he wouldn't come over. Then she heard the doorknob…
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
"Rory?" she heard, "I'm back!" Lorelai said, opening the door, and shaking her keys out before shutting it close.
'Oh no…' Rory thought, 'She must have come back because she felt bad about the Brad thing,' she made her way out of her room and hugged her Mom.
"Hey, why are you home so early?" Rory asked, pretending she had no idea why.
"Well, I felt bad just leaving you without telling you about Brad." Lorelai said apologetically, starting to put her purse down.
"Oh, well Its ok. I read my diary and I know everything about him." Rory stated, as if she said it all the time, and turned around beginning to walk back to the kitchen. Lorelai quickly, but gently, grabbed her arm to pull her back, and Rory threw her arm out of Lorelai's grasp as if by habit. Lorelai stepped back, momentarily stunned, then dropped her hand. "Sorry…" she said, her face toward the ground.
"Mom, sorry… I just, I don't even know. My body sometimes does and feels these things I cant understand because I simply cant remember. This sucks, I just want to remember!" Rory said it more angrily than sad, and defensively hugged herself.
"Aw but Rory baby, its not that easy. Are you Ok about this whole Brad situation? Now that you know about it?" Lorelai put her arm around Rory and placed her head on top of hers, leading them both to the kitchen. After a few steps, Rory pushed them away and faced Lorelai.
"Listen, can I just have some time alone?" Lorelai was hurt by Rory's rejection, but didn't show it. "Yea," she said, " are you sure? Its a lot to take in finding out these things about your past. I meant to tell you Ror, I really did… I'm sorry you found out this way."
"Mom I'm fine I promise. I don't even remember it, to me its just like reading another book. Just, go back to Sookie's for a little bit. I need some time to think, I'm sure you do to. When you come home, we will talk about it. I promise." Rory half smiled and Lorelai did the same.
"Ok babe, Ill just, be back around 11 then." Lorelai backed up and grabbed her purse, sadly making her way out the door again.
Rory sighed with relief, as she watched her Mom leave. She knew what a disaster it would be if the two had run into each other, she read all about how much her Mom hated him and the things Luke and Jess did to him. It only gave her all the more reason to regret her decision to invite him over, though, knowing that everyone hated him and that they would lose trust in her if they found out what she was doing. She walked over to the phone, thinking of possibly calling Brad again, and uninviting him or telling him something came up. But she figured it was to late, and sat down on the couch, waiting for his arrival.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
A/N - Not much to say except I expect the next chapter to be full of intensity and regrets. I haven't written it yet, I'm in the beginning process's of it though. Please R&R so I know where I should go with my next chapter, and wish me luck on my exams!
"Wow. Good guess."
"Wow, its been… a long time."
"Yea. Guess it has."
"How have you been?"
"To be honest, not to hot Brad." Saying his name made her shiver, why did it have that sort of effect on her? She had read the diary, she knew what went on. But actually saying his name made her body tremble like it knew what was going on, even though her mind didn't.
"How come? Is everything OK?"
"Not really. To make a long story short, I was in a car accident. I had my memory of the last few years knocked right out of me. Not knowing it was a blessing in disguise, I decided to dig up the past and guess what Brad? I found my journal. The one that explains how YOU hit me and how YOU obviously didn't care about me. You see, then I might have not been strong enough to say anything back to you, or I might have just been to scared. Now I'm not. What do you have to say for yourself?"
"Rory… I don't know what to say. When we broke up a while ago, I went and got help. Now I'm under control, I know how to manage my anger and I'm all better Rory, I swear it. I was going to call you, next week, when I ended my regular therapy sessions and tell you in hopes you would consider another shot at our relationship. It would be a new, healthy, relationship where everything is under control. I don't want you to rush into anything… I just want you to understand. Read the good entries Rory, I promise you that you were happy with me, and you can be again. I can make it work."
Rory sat, in disbelief. Something about his voice made her long for him, for who he used to be and for who he had become. Something had taken over her, wanting to know everything she possibly could about her past. She didn't want to miss out on anything, she wanted everything she knew back in her mind where it belonged, so she made an offer.
"Then show me." She blurted out.
"Show you?" He asked, obviously confused by her uncharacteristic way of showing some sort of pity on him.
"Now. Come over now, and show me how you can make things better. We are NOT doing anything physically, and I'm taking a big step here by trying this. Don't think its all for you either, I just hope maybe you can help me remember some things about my past. I mean, if I spent so much time with you, then you've got to know something others don't."
Brad smiled on the other end of the phone, obviously ecstatic about the fact that Rory might take him back. Then he quickly thought of Lorelai, and Jess, and especially Luke.
"I would," he stuttered, "but nobody really likes me there. Jess, Luke, and definatly not you Mom. I mean, I hit you Rory. I'm not going to deny it, since part of my problem was just that - always denying it. But I'm changed Rory, and I do want to make it up to you."
Rory had a gut feeling not to do this, not to invite him over. She knew it was wrong in everyway possible, but damn it, Rory wanted more than anything to start remembering her past. And if Brad had been going to therapy, well, then everything should go just fine. She only planned on inviting him over for a few minutes anyway, and definatly before her Mom got home. Once more, the gut feeling to call of the whole meeting hit her intensely, but again she shoved the feeling aside.
"No body's here, but you still should come through my window. Brad… don't screw this up. In my diary your one shitty guy but I'm giving you another chance. We ARENT getting back together, I just want to know some things."
At that, Brads smile quickly faded into frown and his eyebrows dropped. An envious expression crossed his face as he asked Rory the fateful question, "Your with that asshole Jess. Aren't you?" Rory was taken by surprise at this, figuring Brad had known.
"Yea, I am. Well, kinda. I don't know, its weird… please, just get over here before I change my mind Ok?"
Brad made a noise into the phone that Rory took as a yes, and then slammed it down. "Ha, therapy sessions, what a friggin retard," Brad mumbled to himself, looking at the pictures all over his room of Rory and him. "I cant believe she's with Jess. We could have been perfect together…" his hands slowly reached the close up picture of Rory's face and he touched her 'cheek' with his fingers, gently massaging it. "But I blew it." he said, quickly changed the soft, gentle touch on Rory's face to a quick yet forceful punch into the wall. "If I cant have her, nobody can." Brad changed his clothes in an attempt to look nice, and gelled his hair.
Then he grabbed his backpack, got on his shoes and made his way out the door, "Mom!!" he yelled, "I'm going to… the library!"
"Whatever!" His Mom called back, putting her beer in the air to signal she heard him.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Rory paced around her room, then caught sight of the window and unlocked the lock. "What the hell was I thinking!" she said to herself, quickly locking the lock again. "No, I want him here…" she unlocked the window and stepped backwards two steps. Then, just as quickly she lunged for the window and locked it again. "Dammit!" she yelled, slamming her fists on the window sill. If this is what she wanted, why was she having such a hard time follow through with it? She KNEW it was wrong already, she knew before she even invited him. But now it seemed much more wrong, like she had really done something stupid. She wished with all her might he wouldn't come over. Then she heard the doorknob…
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
"Rory?" she heard, "I'm back!" Lorelai said, opening the door, and shaking her keys out before shutting it close.
'Oh no…' Rory thought, 'She must have come back because she felt bad about the Brad thing,' she made her way out of her room and hugged her Mom.
"Hey, why are you home so early?" Rory asked, pretending she had no idea why.
"Well, I felt bad just leaving you without telling you about Brad." Lorelai said apologetically, starting to put her purse down.
"Oh, well Its ok. I read my diary and I know everything about him." Rory stated, as if she said it all the time, and turned around beginning to walk back to the kitchen. Lorelai quickly, but gently, grabbed her arm to pull her back, and Rory threw her arm out of Lorelai's grasp as if by habit. Lorelai stepped back, momentarily stunned, then dropped her hand. "Sorry…" she said, her face toward the ground.
"Mom, sorry… I just, I don't even know. My body sometimes does and feels these things I cant understand because I simply cant remember. This sucks, I just want to remember!" Rory said it more angrily than sad, and defensively hugged herself.
"Aw but Rory baby, its not that easy. Are you Ok about this whole Brad situation? Now that you know about it?" Lorelai put her arm around Rory and placed her head on top of hers, leading them both to the kitchen. After a few steps, Rory pushed them away and faced Lorelai.
"Listen, can I just have some time alone?" Lorelai was hurt by Rory's rejection, but didn't show it. "Yea," she said, " are you sure? Its a lot to take in finding out these things about your past. I meant to tell you Ror, I really did… I'm sorry you found out this way."
"Mom I'm fine I promise. I don't even remember it, to me its just like reading another book. Just, go back to Sookie's for a little bit. I need some time to think, I'm sure you do to. When you come home, we will talk about it. I promise." Rory half smiled and Lorelai did the same.
"Ok babe, Ill just, be back around 11 then." Lorelai backed up and grabbed her purse, sadly making her way out the door again.
Rory sighed with relief, as she watched her Mom leave. She knew what a disaster it would be if the two had run into each other, she read all about how much her Mom hated him and the things Luke and Jess did to him. It only gave her all the more reason to regret her decision to invite him over, though, knowing that everyone hated him and that they would lose trust in her if they found out what she was doing. She walked over to the phone, thinking of possibly calling Brad again, and uninviting him or telling him something came up. But she figured it was to late, and sat down on the couch, waiting for his arrival.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
A/N - Not much to say except I expect the next chapter to be full of intensity and regrets. I haven't written it yet, I'm in the beginning process's of it though. Please R&R so I know where I should go with my next chapter, and wish me luck on my exams!