Title: When the World is Running Down… (Chapter 24 of Don't Stop the Dance)


Author: Xionin

Rating: R

Pairing: Buffy/Spike. Other major characters included.

Feedback: Mercy buckets!
Lynne C. and Jude Space - you guys are inspirations to me.

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Joss. The rest is mine all mine!!!
Bwah ha hahahaha…

Notes: Takes place during 'End of Days' and 'Chosen'


Muchas Gracias: Miss Kitty and Siobhan: What would I do with out you guys?

Enjoy!

~Xionin

Previously on Buffy [courtesy of UPN.com]: Caleb is furious Buffy got away with the scythe. The First has "merged" with Caleb, and plans to do the same with everyone on earth to create a new world. Right now, though, it makes do with merging only with Caleb to provide him with strength, and for a moment, it reveals its true self. With Willow's help, Buffy finds the ruins of an unconsecrated burial ground behind the cemetery. She discovers an overgrown tomb and, once inside, she is surprised by an old woman. Once "one of many," the woman was one of the group that created the scythe hundreds of years before and placed it in the rock. It was made outside the knowledge of the Shadowmen (later called Watchers), which explains why Giles had known nothing of its existence. Since there was no one watching the Watchers, this woman became a guardian for the Slayer. "Perhaps you can beat the rising dark, she tells Buffy, "One way or the other, it can only mean an end is truly near." At that moment, hands appear behind the woman's neck and break it. It's Caleb; strong after his merge with the First, and he makes some progress in defeating the Slayer. He gets the scythe away from Buffy and holds it above her head, ready to make the kill, when an arm comes out of nowhere and clocks him. It's Angel. He helps Buffy up, and offers to fight Caleb, but she knows she must do it herself. Eventually, Buffy slices Caleb in the gut, and he falls. Angel smiles, enjoying the show.

When the World is Running Down, You Make the Best of What's Still Around

"At least you could tell me you're glad to see me."

"I am." She says a little stunned at seeing her first love. "S'been a long time." She knows she's grinning like a schoolgirl, but can't help herself. Angel smiles at her reaction.

"Not so long that I've been forgotten, is it?" He steps closer to her and she begins to tremble. At the entrance to the tomb, Spike walks in but stops in his tracks when he sees the occupants. His eyes go wide and then narrow as he quietly steps back to observe from the shadows.

"H-how have y-you been?" Buffy's knees are about to give out. Stop it! She chides herself. What are you, 16? Angel smiles a little more and tilts his head to the side regarding her.

"I've been better, but it looks like time has treated you well. You look amazing." Buffy blushes and looks down. Spike clenches his jaw.

"Oh dear." The First appears at his side in the form of Buffy, he doesn't turn or even acknowledge it. His eyes are riveted to his love and her reaction to his grandsire. "Looks like you've been replaced…or…were you the replacement?" The First smiles.

"Uh thanks, you l-look...good...too." Buffy looks like a deer caught in headlights and she takes a moment to collect herself, stepping back a bit from the man in front of her.

"I like your shiny toy." He says grinning, glancing at the scythe. "Very scary."

"And useful too." She giggles nervously, avoiding his eyes.

Angel smirks and steps around her to retrieve a folder from the wall. Spike slips further into the shadows so as not to be seen. He's more than a little miffed that neither of them has even noticed he's there, actually. The Slayer and Angel both should've sensed him right away. It is obvious to him that they're…distracted. His fists begin to clench.

I knew this was comin'. Dammit, I knew it. Red was right.

Angel hands Buffy the portfolio. "I know all about what you've been fighting up here. Sorry I couldn't come sooner, we had our hands full in LA."

"Is this gonna help?" Buffy takes the dossier as she finally finds her voice.

"Yeah, I think so." Angel says admiring her focus. This is definitely not the girl he left 4 years ago. She's all woman now. Something tells him the experiences she's been through have matured her pretty quickly, but he also senses something else. Something he can't quite put a finger on.

"Is the source reliable?" She peeks inside the folder.

"Not in the least." He says chuckling.

"Ah, well…any port in an apocalypse, right?" She mutters. He steps closer to her.

"How are you really?" He tone turns serious. Buffy sighs and her shoulders sag a bit.

"I'm…alright, considering, but…"

"But? I get the impression something's going on with you; something non-apocalyptic." He leans down to meet her eyes.

"That depends on your idea of an apocalypse. Things around here have been…tense." She tucks the folder under her arm and runs her hand down her neck; Angel's eyes follow. A shadow of lust crosses his features and it doesn't go unnoticed by Spike. He has to restrain himself from growling.

"Yeah, Spikey…" the First taunts. "She needs you real bad." It laughs.

"Oh yeah? Well, have you considered a move?" Angel's not sure why he'd said the words, but the seed is suddenly flowering in his mind.

"A move?" Buffy looks at him questioningly.

"LA's got great shopping." His voice lowers intimately. It's the affect she has on him. 4 years and nothing's changes, well…seemingly nothing. She's more beautiful than he'd remembered. And she's more confident now. Quite a gir- no, woman.

Buffy's eyes go wide at his blatant offer. Spike's eyes close and he turns around only to open them again to the First grinning at him with her face.

"Wow, Spike. Guess last night really was 'nothing'." He does growl this time and walks through the apparition back out into the night.

"Are you…you want me to…" Buffy's mind is suddenly flooded with memories and possibilities. "But what about…"

"Buffy-" Angel steps into her and her head tilts up to look him in the eye. "I didn't come here with this in mind, but…seeing you again…maybe when this is finished..."

Buffy closes here eyes. What is this? My God, I mean… Angel's asking me to move to LA? Angel studies her face and he lowers his mouth to hers. When their lips brush each other, Buffy's eyes pop open.

Angel. Kissing Angel. It feels…feels so…

You are going to be tested, Buffy. Tempted. Don't give in.
You will know what is right and what is true.

Wrong. It feels wrong!

Buffy breaks the kiss and steps away from him, shaking her head to clear it. Just then, Caleb rises up and strikes Angel in the back of the head with a statuette. He slumps to the floor and Caleb steps over him.

"You ready to finish this now, you dirty girl?" He grins menacingly, his eyes streaking black evil. Buffy steps back, tossing the folder aside, and swings the scythe comfortably in her hand.

"Bring it on."

Caleb lunges after her and she sidesteps him, swinging around with the weapon but he ducks and grabs her arm, throwing her into the wall. It hurts. She slides down but jumps right back up clutching the scythe. Angel is still unconscious on the floor.

She advances first, this time, and gets a few good kicks in before he grabs her again and throws her first to the ceiling and then to the floor. She rolls out of the way just before his foot comes crashing down where her throat would have been.

"Stop dancin' around, girlie, you're only puttin' off the inevitable." Caleb's voice has taken on an otherworldly timbre, no doubt the effect of his infusion with the First Evil. He grabs the center of the scythe and twists her arms so that she almost loses her grip but then she pulls it, and him, towards herself; bringing her knee up to his head.

He stumbles back, momentarily fazed, but recovers quickly. He curls his arms and his fists and launches into another attack but Buffy delivers a stunning roundhouse kick to his face. It doesn't have the desired effect, however, as he simply absorbs the energy of the blows.

He reaches for her, but she ducks and brings the scythe, blade up, to his groin. She stands in front of him, watching the pain work its way across his distorted features. A moment later she wrenches the blade upward effectively slicing the man in half.

She is standing over the remains when Angel slowly returns to consciousness. He jumps up and spins around to face her.

"Okay now I'm pissed! Where is he?" he looks at Buffy and then at the mutilated carcass on the ground. He opens his mouth in a silent 'wow.'

"Guess he had to split." Buffy says cheerily. Angel approaches her with an enormous feeling of pride.

"And here I thought I was coming to rescue a damsel in distress." He smiles at her.

"Never been one for the damsel-ing." She smiles back, but when he closes the distance between them, she turns away.

"Angel…" She looks down.

"Buffy…think of it. I mean, I know we can't…but just having you there…" The more he thinks about it the more he wants it to happen. He'd just lost two people he loved deeply, it seems so wrong to waste time away from the one that still holds such a huge piece of his heart. Whatever there would be between them, Angel believes that they will always be a part of one another. It suddenly doesn't make sense for them to be separated any longer.

"I-I…Angel...it's tempting, but-" I love Spike. She picks up the folder and pretends to skim through it.

"But what?" Angel is beginning to suspect the 'something' he'd sensed earlier.

"I just...can't." She says, walking through the entrance. When she steps outside, the cool air feels so good; she takes a deep cleansing breath. Angel follows close behind.

"Can't or won't?" She ignores him. "Buffy…wait up…there's something else." She stops and turns around.

"What is it?" Angel holds out an amulet with a clear crystal center. "What's that?" He walks up to give her a closer look.

"I got it from the same place I got the folder. It's meant to help in the battle. It's supposed to worn by a champion."

"Me?" She reaches for the object.

"No. Not you. Someone ensouled but more than human…Me."

"You?" She looks at him, the surprise etched in her features.

"Yeah. I'll be fighting with you." He smiles.

"You're going to stay and fight?" She smiles disbelievingly.

"Til the end. Shoulder to shoulder." His voice softens. "I'm yours."

Buffy contemplates his words, but the meaning behind them sets in.

"No." She looks away.

"No?" It's Angel's turn to be confused. "What do you mean 'no'?"

"I mean no as in you have to go back to LA." She turns from him and walks further into the cemetery.

"Buffy, hold on…" He runs to catch up with her. "Why do you want me to leave?" she stops and turns towards him.

"Angel…if I lose…if this thing beats me…it could be days…hours even before the rest of the world goes. I need you in LA. I need a second front." Angel squints his eyes and then he nods.

"O…K. That's one reason. What's the other?" Buffy panics for a moment and she turns from him and walks a little further. She's not in any shape to handle Angel's reaction to her feelings for-

"Is it Spike?" His voice freezes her on the spot. She turns back to him as he approaches. "I have a pretty good memory of his scent."

"Um…can I just say gross?" She shuffles from one foot to the other and Angel picks up on her discomfort.

"Is it?" He stops in front of her, but she turns as walks even further. Angel laughs suddenly. "It is, isn't it? Geez, Buffy! Is that why you don't want to come to LA?"

"You don't understand!" She says, still walking. He runs up and catches her arm, spinning her around to face him.

"Damn right I don't! We're talking about Captain Peroxide here! You're throwing me over for him?" Buffy bristles at his tone.

"Spike's different. He's changed...He has a soul now." That stops Angel's mounting anger.

"He…what?"

"He has a soul, but it's more than that. He…we…" She trails off.

"Are you in love with him?" Angel's voice has lowered to a whisper. "Is he…your boyfriend?"

"No." Angel sighs in relief. "But he is, in my heart."

"You're in love with him." He states rather than asks. Buffy merely looks at him and he can see it.

"That'll end well all right." He snorts and walks over to lean on a tomb.

"I'm sorry, and what was the highlight of our relationship? Would that be when you left me or when I killed you and sent you to a hell dimension?"

"C'mon Buffy, you can't honestly expect me to believe that-"

"That what? I love Spike? I do. I'm totally, completely, head-over-heels, nutso facto in love with him. There. Happy to hear the words?" Angel's mouth drops open stunned. He closes it with a snap.

"But…it's Spike!"

"You know, you've been gone a long time. A long time! I can't believe you'd waltz in here and expect everything…everyone to be the same. We don't live in a bubble up here, Angel. People grow. They change."

"Not Spike, Buffy, I've known him for over a century. He doesn't change." Buffy exhales sharply as she levels an angry gaze at him.

"You're bloody unbelievable!" Angel laughs out loud.

"Good grief, now you even sound like him!" He laughs again, and she soon joins him as the tension breaks. They gaze at each other for a while, both shaking their heads.

"So...tell me about your Spike," he says quietly. She softens immediately as her feelings for the blonde lay themselves out in the open.

She tells him everything. Every detail, excluding the complete story about the time he'd attacked her. She tells him of his protection of Dawn, his enduring torture at the hands of Glory and the First. She tells him of his quest for the soul: everything. Angel slides down the tomb and sits on the grass. He is shaking his head in disbelief. This certainly doesn't sound like the Spike he's known for over a hundred years.

"And now…" Buffy sighs and sits next to him. "Now I've got to make him understand…I have to tell him…how I feel."

"Wait. You mean he doesn't know?" He turns to her, his brow knit in confusion.

"No. He doesn't. It's been a mess, Angel…a really big mess. I may have lost him, but I'm going to try to set things right. Tonight. I know he loves me, I just hope he can forgive me." She finishes softly. Angel places his hand on hers.

"Buffy…if I know Spike at all, I think he already has. But-" he takes her chin in his hand. "If he makes you happy, you've got to tell him. Now, before it's-." Buffy smiles, noting the pain in his features. He returns it. "Go to him."

They both stand and embrace. Angel turns to walk away. "Oh!" He hands her the amulet. "Here." She smiles and tilts her head.

"I have real issues when it comes to relationships, don't I?" She asks, turning the item over in her palm.

"Who doesn't?" He replies. "I think you've grown quite a bit, if you don't mind my saying."

"Yeah, well I don't feel so grown–up." She pouts. He smiles. There's my Buffy.

"You're still growing, Buff. Constantly. There's no rush."

"Yeah, I guess...I guess I've always thought that I needed to hurry up and get as much life in as possible you know? Before-"

"Hey, now, none of that." They both smile. "So…you see a future with Spike?" She takes a moment to think about that.

"Yeah, I do." She looks down so that she doesn't see the hurt in his eyes.

"It's okay, Buffy. Really." He lifts her chin and looks into her eyes. "I haven't seen this look on you, even when we were-"

"Oh Angel…don't compare."

"I'm not." He smiles a little, caressing her face. "It's just…I wish it could've been me." She smiles but doesn't respond. "But if he makes you glow…like this…" He pulls her into an embrace. "Spike's a devoted man, Buffy. If you let him he'll follow you to the ends of the earth. I do know that much about him."

His voice is a whisper in her ear. She closes her eyes relishing this one last time to feel him this close. She wraps her arms around him and buries her face in his chest. He strokes her hair. They stand this way for several moments, rocking slowly back and forth. It's the last goodbye. Finally she pulls back and looks up into his face.

"Part of me will always love you." He smiles and the tears tickle the backs of his eyes.

"All of me will always love you, Buffy Summers." His voice falters as he crashes his lips over hers for a moment and then abruptly lets her go and walks away without looking back.

She stands there for a moment, a few tears dripping down her face. She smiles and looks down at the amulet in her hand.

Meant for a champion. My Champion.

~~~~~~~~

When Buffy walks through the front door, Dawn is standing there looking…rather cross. Buffy smiles and says "It slices, it dices and it makes julienne Caleb."

"You killed him?" Xander chirps from the dining room.

"Yep." Buffy grins.

"Way to go, Buff!" Willow smiles in relief.

Buffy turns back to Dawn who looks less than impressed. She wrinkles her brow trying to figure out what's wrong. Dawn huffs and kicks Buffy in the shin.

"Ow!"

"Dumbass." Dawn arches her eyebrow. It's very Spike-like. Buffy looks at her confused.

"What'd I do?" She turns to Xander and Anya who is massaging his shoulders.

"Don't look at me, Buffy. All of you Summers women are violent." Xander holds up his hands. Buffy frowns and looks back at Dawn.

"What's going on?"

"What did you say to Spike?" Dawn crosses her arms and taps her foot impatiently.

"Huh? I haven't seen Spike since I left. Is he here?" She attempts to step around her sister, but Dawn blocks the way.

"I don't know what you said, Buffy, but he came back from the cemetery in a foul mood. He's been in the basement punching things for the last hour."

"He wha-? The cemetery…I-I didn't see him th-…oh…oh no…" Buffy's eyes go wide and Dawn uncrosses her arms.

"Buffy, what happened?"

"Angel." She says quietly, bending to lean the scythe against the staircase. She hands Xander the folder.

"Angel's here?" He asks, taking it from her.

"He was. At the cemetery." Dawn's mouth forms an 'o' but she doesn't speak. Then the anger returns as her face goes red.

"And what was he doing here?" Buffy turns to Willow as Giles enters the room.

"H-he brought me that folder…it has information on the First. Stuff we can use." Giles puts on his glasses and takes the folder from Xander. "He said that the source isn't too reliable, but it's better than nothing."

"And that's what has Spike so upset?" Dawn asks her. "He gave you a folder?" Willow glances up from the files and looks at Buffy.

"N-no. He must've…he must've seen Angel…kissing…me." Buffy reluctantly looks at her sister whose eyes squint. Willow's eyes go wide, however, and she gasps. Buffy looks over at her.

"Yeah…exactly. Look, i-it was o-only a moment, and I pulled away, but to the right person…at the wrong time..."

"It could look like more." Anya finishes solemnly. Buffy nods.

"What's the big?" Xander says. "I mean so what Spike saw you kissing Angel, which, I might add, is not a phrase I ever thought I'd hear myself say."

"Shut up Xander." Willow snips. She walks over to Buffy and Dawn who hasn't stopped glaring at her sister.

"Buffy…where's Angel now?"

"Gone. I sent him back to LA. Second front. He wanted to stay, but-"

"But?" Willow's expression becomes nervous. Uh oh. Did I misinterpret the vision?

"I told him about Spike."

"What did you tell him, Buffy?" Dawn's tone is softer. She knows how hard it must have been for her sister to see her first love and to tell him that she had a new one, especially given the history between the two vamps. Buffy merely looks at her. "You told him."

"Yeah." It's a whisper.

"Well," Dawn takes her sister's hands and squeezes them encouragingly. "Now you gotta tell him." She nods towards the basement. Buffy smiles and releases her sister's hands, steps around her and heads to the door. Everyone turns to watch her leave.

When they hear the sound of the door closing, they all turn to Dawn. Giles takes off his glasses and he looks at her.

"She's…"

"In love." Dawn finishes the thought, her head high. Willow frowns. Xander grunts.

"Well, duh!" Anya says which makes Dawn laugh.

"I don't understand." Willow says.

"That makes two of us, Will." Xander pipes in.

"No…n-not that, I meant…I saw them…together…her and Angel. I saw them kissing."

"How could you have seen that, Will, you've been here the whole night," Xander asks.

"No, I didn't see it, see it…I saw it...in a vision." She looks at Giles.

"Willow…would this be the same vision you showed to Spike?" She nods.

"Wait…" Dawn crosses her arms again. "You showed Spike a vision? Of Angel and Buffy kissing?" Willow nods again as she winces. "And why?"

"Yeah, Will…why?" Xander, Anya and Giles all stare at her in various degrees of confusion, disbelief and concern.

"I-I-I thought he should be prepared." She stammers.

"Prepared for what?" Anya asks.

"For them, her and Angel. I didn't think she would turn him away, I mean it's Angel!" She begins pacing. "Look, I just wanted to make sure he would still stay and fight even if he knew she didn't want him." She wrings her hands and then holds them out as if to say 'see?'

"But she does want him, Willow. Wow! You don't know what you've done." Dawn's face is reddening further still.

"Dawn...what do you mean?" Giles steps around the table and approaches her.

"I mean you…all of you…you all hate him so much."

"Dawnie, no, it's just-" Willow attempts to explain.

"What? He's not good enough?"

"He's a…vampire, Dawn." Xander cuts in. "I know that may seem kinda cool to you, but-" Dawn cuts him off with a sharp laugh.

"You people treat me like a goddamned child!" She glares at them all. "You're the children here. You turned on Buffy last night and today you act like nothing happened. She was hurting but she still got up this morning and went on with the fight. She saved your sorry asses again and you're still trying to manipulate her!" Giles clears his throat.

"I'm sorry Giles, is my using dirty words damaging your view of me? I. Am. Not. A. Little. Girl. And Buffy is my sister. I want her to be happy. Spike makes her unbelievably happy! Had you even noticed that?"

They all look down, avoiding her accusing eyes.

"Of course not because it doesn't fit into your narrow fucking views!"

"Dawn!"

"What are you going to do, Willow, punish me? Haven't you done enough punishing for one day? Do you have any idea at all how close we came to losing her last night?" No one answers. "She had no intention of fighting anymore. None. I cried myself to sleep because I just knew that you had finally done it. You'd finally crushed her." Her voice begins to break and Willow reaches out for her, but she pulls away.

"Spike brought her back to you…to us. I don't know what happened between them, but I do know that whatever it was brought her back to me." She turns to Willow.

"That vision stunt of yours may have cost Buffy the only shot at happiness she'll ever get, Willow. Do you get that?" She turns to the rest of them. "Do you even see how much they love each other? Do you care? Does it get in the way of your battle plan? Your lives?" They all stare in stunned silence.

"Then why?" The tears are flowing freely now, but she ignores them. Big girls cry too. "Why do you hate her…them…so much?" She is sobbing now and Willow does take her into her arms. Giles glances around the room and all of the expressions are the same: shame and guilt.

Willow meets Giles' eyes and she lifts her eyebrows as if to say 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.' Giles nods. Dawn straightens up and looks around at them once more.

"Please let them have this. They really, really need each other…and we could all die tomorrow." She finishes softly, turns and runs up the steps.

"Wow." Xander whispers.

"Yeah." Willow responds. They all gather around the table to look of the documents each determined to ignore what may be happening in the basement. They speak in hushed tones as the go over the new information.

~~~~~~~~~~

Buffy hears the grunts and the punches as she walks down the steps. Spike looks up when he senses her. He stops pummeling the bag and scowls.

"Hey." She says softly.

"Where's Peaches?" He grinds out.

"Gone." She steps closer to him.

"Oh. Stop by for a quickie then?" She winces.

"Good. Good. Don't hold back. I haven't had enough jealous vampire crap for one day." She walks past him and notices a rather crude caricature of Angel taped to the punching bag. She has to laugh. "Cute. Your work?" He ignores her.

"Buffy, I can't do this." He isn't angry as much as he is resigned. She softens.

"Do what…exactly?" She repeats her question from earlier.

"This." He points to the floor.

"Spike. I know why you're angry."

"M'not." He sighs. "Well…I am, but not at you. I'm…"

"What?" She steps towards him.

"I'm mad at m'self for believin'…you could…"

"I could…what?" She takes another step and forces herself not to smile.

"Let's not do this, luv." His voice is a hoarse whisper. She stops advancing when she sees how deeply hurt he really is.

"Spike-"

"S'ok. I know what he means to you." He whispers.

"No…you don't." She takes another step forward.

"Yes. I do. I used my enhanced vampire eyeballs to watch you two together. He still wants you. Can't blame 'im."

"Yes, part of him does want me. He asked me to move to LA when this is over." Spike feels a sharp pain in his gut. Damn you, Angel.

"I'm not going, Spike." He tilts his head and stares at her.

"Why not? It's what you've wanted."

"Is it really?" She takes another step.

They're less than a meter apart now. Spike searches her face, but he doesn't know how to interpret what he sees. She smiles and reaches across the distance between them to caress his cheek. His eyes instinctively close as he leans into her touch. She steps into him. He looks down at her and begins to tremble.

She traces her finger along his jaw line, across his lips and down the bridge of his nose. His eyes go wide. She smiles again.

"Why did he leave, Buffy?"

"I don't need him."

"What do you need?"

"I need you, Spike." He inhales sharply and steps back from her.

"Yeah, w-well, y-you've got Angel breath."

She merely smiles. Feeling in her pocket, she pulls out the amulet.

"Wha's that?" He eyes the object. "A gift from pookie?"

"Angel said it might help us win. He said it's meant to be worn by someone with a soul that's more than human." She twirls the pendant in her fingers, watching the light play across the facets of the cut crystal. Spike is mesmerized for a moment but then he puts his hand out.

"Hand it over, then."

"Why?" She grins.

"If Angel was meant to wear it, and you sent 'im away, that leaves me."

"It's volatile. We don't know what-"

"So? You'll need someone strong, unless you plan t'have Super Andrew wear it."

"It's meant to be worn by a champion." She states softly. His expression changes then as he realizes she doesn't mean to give it to him. He lowers his head embarrassed to have thought himself worthy.

Buffy steps to him once more and she takes his hand. He looks up at her before watching her place the amulet in his palm. His gaze darts back to her eyes and Buffy can see the truth dawning on him as his mouth goes slack with amazement.

"Buffy-" his hand closes around the charm. He looks at her with complete awe and wonder in his eyes. "'Been called a lot of things in my day." She smiles with pride.

"Everyone is always so sure they know what I want." She says quietly, again tracing her fingertips across his features. "Everyone is always so sure they get me." She looks up into his eyes and sees the tears glistening there. She places her hands on either side of his face and brings his forehead to meet hers. He exhales slowly.

"Buffy." It's softer than a whisper. She closes her eyes.

"I'm in love with you, Spike."

There is a brief moment of absolute silence. They are in a vacuum.

Oh God, Buffy, I am so desperately in love with you.

Buffy opens her green orbs and looks into the purest blue she's ever known. She is trembling now.

"Say it out loud, Spike. Please. I need to hear you say it." Tears are dancing in her eyes now too. Spike reaches up a trembling hand and wipes some of the salty liquid from her cheek. He shuts off his gaze for a moment and then looks into her green pools determinedly.

"I…am in love with you, Buffy Summers." His voice is strong despite the shaking of his knees. Buffy smiles through a frown and then dissolves into tears as she melts into him. He crushes her to his body and rains kisses all over her hair and shoulders.

After a few moments, they pull back simultaneously. Spike wipes her cheeks again and she returns the favor. They look on each other with a new recognition. There are no barriers left. It's all out in the open, finally. They can hardly believe it isn't a dream.

Both gazes drift southward as they lock onto each other's mouths. Spike leans in hesitantly and Buffy tilts her head. Both sets of eyes slowly close as their lips meet.

The kiss is oh…so…soft.

It brings more tears out of the pair, being better than they'd ever imagined.
Love tastes so different when it's equal on both sides.

They move together instinctively and Spike lowers Buffy to the cot. He walks across the room, his eyes never leaving hers, and turns off the light. The moon casts thin ribbons of silver across the room. They hit the angles of his face and make his dark blue sparkle. Buffy loses her breath at the sight of him.

He walks over and climbs into the space between her body and the wall, bringing her close and wrapping his arms around her possessively. His touch is gentle. Buffy sighs and lays her head on his chest, draping one arm across his waist. She traps his thigh between hers. He strokes her back in small circles and kisses the top of her head.

Buffy closes her eyes and soon her breathing slows as she slips into contented sleep.

Spike follows closely behind but occasionally he wakes and squeezes her closer to him, afraid it's all a dream.

~~~~~~

Tonight, for them, is more glorious than anything in Heaven or on earth.

It's been a long, difficult road, but this night they get to rest.
This night, things make sense.

They know they can't hold on to this; that this is only a moment. They know that moments don't last and that they slip through your hands despite, or perhaps because of, how tightly you grasp them.

The world is running down and tomorrow they may face death.

But tonight...

Tonight theirs' is a world of beauty: a moment of love.
There is peace to be found and they find it this night.
They find it in each other.

Tomorrow they may say it was too little and too late.

But tonight...none of it matters.

TBC Chapter 25: Can't Stand Losing You

Author's note: I must thank Mary Anne over at BAPS for unknowingly helping me with the ending to this chapter. She wrote such a beautiful post about Spike and Buffy's scene in "Touched." I paraphrased some of it here.