In case I forgot to state in the first chapter, I don't own Utena. And I don't know a thing about fencing. Wish I did. And I must apologize for the length of this chapter.
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Love is a Chain Gang
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In the fencing gym locker room, Juri found she couldn't fit all her books in her locker. She ended up just stacking them on top and hoping no one would steal them. The fencing uniform was itchy; the full-length pale blue bodysuit under the leotard armor was too small for some one of her height. Being taller than any other girl in the class, and most of boys, Juri was intimidating enough to scare away practice partners out on the floor.
Every class consisted of a warm up (stretching and simple thrusts) and then Kira-sempai teaching them a new technique which they all practiced in unison, with him strolling around them, pointing out mistakes. After, they formed duos and practiced on each other. At the end of the class, each student went up against Kira-sempai who would give them advice and tips. Juri constantly found herself paired up with Ruka. Every time groups were formed, the rest of the students left her alone, and Ruka, who avoided pairing up with others, was her only choice.
On the second day, when he made his way over to her, he began to become friendly with her. Not physically, but Juri soon found him talking to her, almost constantly throughout the class. She only made short replies and quick questions, but he talked at length, sometimes on fencing, other times on the people around them, or his ideas.
"Do you believe everyone around you is deserving?" He asked her once.
"What do you mean?"
"I look at the people around me, and sometimes find them of such horrible countenance it makes me sick. Sara Mudo, over there, is a manipulative little crybaby, used to not having to deal with any actual problems. Kato Yue smokes pot right after this class, in the locker room. And yet they are each respected by the people around them, as if people are afraid to admit that some people might not be worth the space they take up."
"That's harsh."
"But how can you disagree with me? Everyone likes Kato Yue, even Kira-sempai's polite to him, but he isn't deserving of affection. He receives attention that would benefit some one of more importance and greater character. Like you, for example."
"Me?"
"Everyone's afraid of you, and they keep a distance. Kira-sempai is very careful around you, as if he's afraid to make you mad. I know you are avoided by the other girls your age, and yet you are superior to almost everyone here."
"Even you?"
He smiled. "Do you have any friends? Not going to answer me, are you? You are cold to everyone around you, but I see you with that other girl everyday after school. What makes her different from other people?"
"She's not afraid of me."
"Neither am I."
Their practice bouts were never as serious as the first time. They practiced off each other, both utilizing the other's moves with their own technique. Ruka carefully evaluated her moves and still found her wanting, which he never hesitated in telling her. She told him his sword was too cocky. He took it as a compliment.
Because Shiori could never make it to any of Juri's fencing classes, they instead ate lunch together after class. Everyone remarked on how such good friends they were. The amazing and untouchable Juri, the lioness, and the innocent and sweet Shiori, the lamb. It was no secret, that though she was avoided, Juri was close to worshipped by girls her own age and younger who envied Shiori. "It's not fair," they whispered. "How can Juri like Shiori? That girl's so plain and witless." However, none of these girls actually approached Juri. After school, Juri would often study by the fountain, not talking to any one unless Shiori could be found to communicate to. Ruka had his own life to contend with: a growing popularity among the girls, awe inspiring to the boys. He was usually invited to dorms by women and to play games with boys. He took advantage of all of it.
"Do you ever wish you were me?" Ruka once asked Juri after practice.
"What would I do with you're body? It's too slow."
"How cruel. I could take you with me, you know. Doing normal teenager stuff. If you ever wanted to interact with me outside fencing."
"Would you want me to?"
Drawing closer to her, with a look of mock amazement, he said, "My my. I think we've actually become friends."
The next day, Ruka was absent from school. When Kira-sempai asked them to pair up, Juri was left utterly alone. She was used being alone, but she was also used to having Ruka there. She stood still in the middle of the grouping freshman, everyone staring at her.
"We do have an odd number today, so I'll pair up with somebody," Kira-sempai said. He began to walk over to Juri when a boy stopped him.
"I'll be partners with Arisugawa-san. It's okay." The brown haired boy abandoned his other usual partner and came over to stand beside Juri. He was just barely taller than her, a single strand of unruly hair hanging in his green eyes. "You don't mind, do you?"
"Not if you don't."
"My name's Hideki Anou."
"Arisugawa Juri."
"I know."
Hideki wasn't a master swordsman, but he held his own. He was friendly, but in a manner completely different from Ruka: it was not predatory. Hideki was pleasant and open, and did not tease her. It was nice having some one different to be with, even if he wasn't a match for her skill.
After class, she continued to talk with Hideki. Shiori approached them quietly and introduced herself. "Ah!" Hideki exclaimed. "You're Shiori. The guys were right. You are very cute."
"Oh, thank you," Shiori murmured, turning pink. Juri scoffed
"Are you two going to the ball?" Both Juri and Shiori looked at him questioningly. "You don't know? It's in the Physics building tomorrow night. Full on Grande Ball. Everybody's going. I bet you both would look beautiful in dresses."
Walking back to the dorms, Shiori asked Juri about the ball. "We could go. Everyone would love to see you in a gown."
"I don't have one."
"I have one for you. Come to my dorm and I'll show you. It'd look wonderful!"
Shiori had a dorm room all to herself because of her late admittance. The sign on the door read Shiori in Hiragana with a little heart next to it. The room was covered in stuffed animals and anime posters of pretty bishoujo in short skirts backed by strong bishounen. Her closet was full of frills and ruffles that seemed to expand every time she removed an outfit, trying to find the one she wanted. "Dang! I know I have in here somewhere. It belonged to my mother, it's too big for me, but it would fit you like a glove. I want you to look elegant and adult, all the boys would go wild!"
Juri glanced at the stuffed bunnies and bears that lined her bed, staring at her with beady eyes that flashed maliciously. In the middle, buried behind a giant Hello Kitty, there was a very small brown teddy bear. Picking it from the sea of fuzzy monsters, its velvet fur was sticky and dirty.
"I found the dress." Juri turned around to see Shiori holding up an elegant white silk evening gown. It was long sleeved with a ruffled v-shaped neckline. The sleeves also ended in ruffled cuffs. "I see you found Bi-chan. Remember when you gave him to me?"
"No, I don't."
"I know you do. I was crying because Akira, the bully in the second grade, had told me I was ugly. You gave me this and told me you thought I was very pretty."
"I remember. I stole it from the toy shop because I didn't have any money."
"You were very brave." The smaller girl held up the dress to Juri. "I knew it was perfect. Do you like it?"
"Yes, it's very beautiful."
"You can't try it on now, if you stay here any longer you won't have time to get back to you dorm before curfew. Take it with you. I'll get a plastic bag." While Shiori went looking, Juri carefully replaced the little bear. "Here you go." It was a small Sanrio bag. "Now we have to go to the ball tomorrow. Meet me here at eight?"
"All right."
Juri moved to the door and put her hand on the knob. Small pale arms encircled her waist, tightening around her abdomen. Shiori's body pressed up against Juri's back with a ruffling of fabric. The bigger girl froze. Shiori's small head nuzzled up against Juri's neck, like a puppy. She hid her face in the golden girls and hugged Juri very tightly. Heat seemed to flow from the smaller body, trying to melt the larger one. "See you at eight. I'll look really pretty." Her voice was small even next to Juri's ear.
"Okay," Juri replied weakly.
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Ruka was back in fencing class the next day. "Were you worried about me?"
"Where were you?"
"Were you worried?" He repeated.
"Can you still swordfight?"
"Of course."
"Then that's all I need to know."
"You missed me, didn't you?"
"Hurry up and fight me."
Ruka was just a little slower than before, as if he was sore from an extreme work out the day before. Juri won easily. Ruka found himself lying on the floor of the gym, gasping for breath.
"What's wrong with you?" Juri demanded, glaring down at him.
He sighed and leaned his head back against the cold floor. "If I was to suddenly disappear, would you miss me?"
"Don't ask silly questions."
"I think you would." He began to get up.
"Nobody else could fight me like you do."
"True, true."
"Arisugawa!" Kira-sempai called out. "Ruka was just in the hospital, go easy on him!"
Ruka got up and assumed the fighting stance.
"You could have told me about your sickness." She mimicked him.
"Do you plan to go the ball tonight?"
"Yes."
"Yes? Do you have a date?"
"None of your business."
"I'll be there, in case you want one."
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The bright lights of Ohtori drowned out the stars even after the sun had set two hours before. The whole campus lay in hibernation, waiting for the tolling of the bell to announce the beginning of the ball. Juri dawned the silk evening gown. It flowed easily over her supple body and dragged on the floor when she moved. A pair of earrings her father had given her when she was younger graced her ears and winked at her from beyond the mirror. Juri did look like an older woman, not young, but experienced. A little before eight she was called down to the center dorm office to accept a phone call. There was only one phone line allowed in the dorm and it was usually in the constant use of a certain girl on the upper floor with a boyfriend in America.
The coldness of the receiver jolted her back into the immediate reality. "Juri-san?"
"Shiori?"
"You'll never guess the good news. I found a date!"
Juri's nails bit into her palm. "That's wonderful."
"I know! He's picking me up at eight. I'll see you at the ball, okay?"
"Who is he?"
"Saionji Kyouichi. He's here right now! Gotta go!" The line went dead.
Juri robotically hung up the phone. The bells tolled telling all of the campus they were now welcome in the main ballroom in the physics hall. Girls danced out of their rooms to meet their dates waiting for them outside, the stairway was a continuous stream of color and jewelry for several minutes. She watched all this with moderate fascination for a few moments and eventually removed herself from the dorm building by way of the back door. By now the campus was drained of its students that had been sucked up by the ball.
Finding herself a cool fountain to sit by, Juri breathed in the cold, misty air, arching her back to look at the gray sky. No, no stars at all. The coldness of wet marble of the fountain easily made it's way through the silk, causing her to shiver and close her eyes.
The sound of footsteps came from her right. She turned to see a long legged older man stalking his way over towards her, his thin ponytail gently dancing from side to side. "Do you like the view?" His voice was incredibly deep, resonating down within the wide expanse of his chest.
"There aren't any stars."
"There will be later tonight, once the ball is over. And if there isn't any then, there might've been a better excuse for my planetarium than I thought."
"Planetarium?" The older man had a dark completion that combated with his silver hair.
"Yes. They're re-installing it the Ohtori tower currently."
"Re-installing?"
"There was another one, but it wasn't big enough. Are you planning to go to the ball?"
"I don't believe so."
"That's unfortunate. I, however, must attend. I'm making a guest appearance."
"Good bye."
"I'll see you around." The man slowly passed her, leaving behind him a faint scent of roses.
Juri lay herself down on the edge of the fountain, being careful not to get her dress in the water. Shiori had a date. With a boy. There was no reason for Juri to go to the ball. She could stay here for the rest of the night and it wouldn't matter. Nothing mattered. Hah! She actually got herself all dressed up. What a stupid dolt she was. As if Shiori would really want to go the ball with her. Really. What a stupid fucking moron she was. Why would Shiori even like her any way? All she cared about was fencing, nothing else. Nothing else mattered. Except Shiori.
"You're not crying, are you?"
Juri jerked herself upwards to see Ruka staring at her with a perturbed expression. She quickly began wiping her face on her sleeve, hiding behind her mane of curls.
"Didn't fancy you the type to cry." He sat down next to her, concerned. After she had finished with her sleeve, she still kept her head down, not looking up at him. Ruka figured she didn't want to respond. "I was looking all over for you at the ball. I expected to see you with an extremely hot date. When I didn't find you, I left my extremely hot date and decided to come and pester you. Now you're all unhappy and I can't annoy you. Damn. What happened? Did you get dumped?"
"No." She said.
"Ah! She speaks! But 'no'? You didn't have a date to begin with?"
"No."
"Then why are you out here?"
"I have no one to go with."
"Somehow, I find that extremely unlikely. Also, I don't think that's the reason you're upset. It must be something more than that. You won't tell me? Fine. But you must know, if you don't, I'll find out some other way and I'll do something drastic to rectify it. And I don't think you'll like my methods."
"Why are you always around me?" She asked.
He gave her a puzzled look. "Isn't it obvious? Because I like you." Then he smiled that smile, leaving his eyes to crease up and disappear into his dark eyelashes.
"You only like me because of my ability with the sword."
"I want to show you something," he said, standing up.
"Huh?"
"C'mon!" He grabbed her hand, pulling her up and along with him. For a moment he pulled Juri against him, his stiff suit rustling. "You're not afraid of me, are you?"
She growled. "I'm not afraid of anything."
"We'll see if you'll ever become afraid of me. In time." Juri found herself being pulled along by her arm, Ruka almost tearing it off at the pace he kept. They wound between fountains, foliage, and buildings, to the opposite side of the campus. Moonlight highlighted the dew on the grass and gleamed in Ruka's hair. When they reached a point on campus that Juri had never seen before, Ruka finally let up and stopped.
Juri saw they had reached a porch of some kind overlooking a magnificent view of the city, which sparkled like raw diamonds in the night. Criss-crosses of marble grew from the terrace, overshadowing a small white bench.
"Nobody comes to this side of the campus. It's too far off from the classrooms. These buildings are just storage. C'mon, let's sit down." Ruka lead her over to the bench. The wood was cool against her skin.
They said nothing for a while, and just gazed at the city below. The headlights of cars traversed the main streets below, making rivers of light on a giant grid.
"Have you ever been down there?" Ruka asked. "To the city?"
"No."
"I can't remember if I have. Sometimes it seems Ohtori is all there is in the world, all that ever was."
"Do you like it that much here?"
"Not particularly. Do you?"
"No."
"No, you don't like it here?"
"No, I don't like it or hate it." Juri was here, why would she bother to wish she were somewhere else?
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"You don't like it or hate it. Do you like anything? Do you hate anything? Do you love anything?" Ruka eyed her questioningly.
"I enjoy fencing."
"Why?"
"You're asking too many questions."
"Okay then. I'll tell you what I think." Ruka leaned in closer to her, his lips next to her ear; his breathe making her earring bob. "You like fencing because you like using your body. You like the way it feels to move fast and attack. You like it because you're good at it."
"Is there anything wrong with that?"
"I suppose not. But do you want to become the best at it?"
"I am the best."
"Have you forgotten that I beat you?" Juri turned to glare at him and found herself face to face with him, their noses brushing. Ruka's eyes were of a darker blue than his hair, black sapphires hidden under thick lashes. "I think you have the potential to become better than me." He kept his voice loud, choosing to ignore the proximity of her face. "But I don't understand what holds you back."
Juri turned away to face the lights of the city and Ruka did the same. They said nothing for a while, each deciding to ignore the presence of the other. The lights twinkled below them, almost like a sea of stars. Juri briefly felt a moment of vertigo, as if the sky were below her and the ground above.
"Would you ever open up to me?" Ruka asked, not turning to look at her.
"Haven't I given you enough?"
"No." He said it as if it were obvious, angry that she didn't know it.
"Want do you want from me?" She asked.
Ruka paused, and for a moment seemed unsure. He regained his composure and stiffened. "Why do you let me near you? Is it just because you're so indifferent to me it's too much of a bother to push me away. I'll go away if you want me to. I'll leave; I won't talk to you anymore. Is that what you want?"
Juri's eyes glazed over. She couldn't understand why Ruka became emotional like this. She kept her voice level as she spoke: "You still haven't said what you want from me."
Ruka turned to face her, and when she didn't respond, he took her chin and forced her to look him in the face. She complied merely because she didn't want to upset him more.
"You. I want you. Can't you tell?"
She stared at him, her feelings kept behind the mask of her face, his clear in the intensity of his eyes. A wave of indigo hair caressed her cheek. His grip softened on her chin and he brought a finger to her lips, gently brushing against them. His skin felt like velvet, gently pressing against her. Hesitating, his gaze drifted from her eyes to her mouth. His breath came faster, hot. Crinkles appeared on his forehead in concentration, as if to keep himself in check. Juri didn't lean forward or away. Ruka moved in closer, bringing his lips to hers.
Did you honestly expect me to let you have me?
"Stop".
He froze, staying where his was, lips on the verge of touching, and moved away.
"I'm going now," she said, her voice lacking any emotion. "Good night".
Ruka avoided her gaze as she stood up. Juri wrapped her arms around herself as she walked away, trying to keep the coldness from the gnawing at her.
"Don't forget that I admitted to it!" He called out after her, angry and alone. "I won't do it again! I won't try and get close to you again! Things will stay the same! But I want you to remember that I admitted to it!"
Juri didn't look back.
When Juri reached her dorm, she was welcomed at her door by a beset Shiori, eyes red with crying, her gloves wet with tears. When Juri had soothed her to the point of understandable speech, she learned the date had gone the way of the Roman Empire. The boy had spent the entire time fussing over his best friend, annoyed at the company of women the best friend had brought with him. Shiori had spent the evening ignored and lonely, wandering around looking for Juri and hiding in the corner.
Juri kissed the tears away, cooing compliments of Shiori's prettiness into her ear. That night Juri expelled her roommate from the dorm, forcing her to (unlawfully) bunk with her boyfriend, and let Shiori spend the night in the lower bunk. Juri listened to Shiori's quiet breathing, in and out, until it lulled her to sleep.
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Love is a Chain Gang
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In the fencing gym locker room, Juri found she couldn't fit all her books in her locker. She ended up just stacking them on top and hoping no one would steal them. The fencing uniform was itchy; the full-length pale blue bodysuit under the leotard armor was too small for some one of her height. Being taller than any other girl in the class, and most of boys, Juri was intimidating enough to scare away practice partners out on the floor.
Every class consisted of a warm up (stretching and simple thrusts) and then Kira-sempai teaching them a new technique which they all practiced in unison, with him strolling around them, pointing out mistakes. After, they formed duos and practiced on each other. At the end of the class, each student went up against Kira-sempai who would give them advice and tips. Juri constantly found herself paired up with Ruka. Every time groups were formed, the rest of the students left her alone, and Ruka, who avoided pairing up with others, was her only choice.
On the second day, when he made his way over to her, he began to become friendly with her. Not physically, but Juri soon found him talking to her, almost constantly throughout the class. She only made short replies and quick questions, but he talked at length, sometimes on fencing, other times on the people around them, or his ideas.
"Do you believe everyone around you is deserving?" He asked her once.
"What do you mean?"
"I look at the people around me, and sometimes find them of such horrible countenance it makes me sick. Sara Mudo, over there, is a manipulative little crybaby, used to not having to deal with any actual problems. Kato Yue smokes pot right after this class, in the locker room. And yet they are each respected by the people around them, as if people are afraid to admit that some people might not be worth the space they take up."
"That's harsh."
"But how can you disagree with me? Everyone likes Kato Yue, even Kira-sempai's polite to him, but he isn't deserving of affection. He receives attention that would benefit some one of more importance and greater character. Like you, for example."
"Me?"
"Everyone's afraid of you, and they keep a distance. Kira-sempai is very careful around you, as if he's afraid to make you mad. I know you are avoided by the other girls your age, and yet you are superior to almost everyone here."
"Even you?"
He smiled. "Do you have any friends? Not going to answer me, are you? You are cold to everyone around you, but I see you with that other girl everyday after school. What makes her different from other people?"
"She's not afraid of me."
"Neither am I."
Their practice bouts were never as serious as the first time. They practiced off each other, both utilizing the other's moves with their own technique. Ruka carefully evaluated her moves and still found her wanting, which he never hesitated in telling her. She told him his sword was too cocky. He took it as a compliment.
Because Shiori could never make it to any of Juri's fencing classes, they instead ate lunch together after class. Everyone remarked on how such good friends they were. The amazing and untouchable Juri, the lioness, and the innocent and sweet Shiori, the lamb. It was no secret, that though she was avoided, Juri was close to worshipped by girls her own age and younger who envied Shiori. "It's not fair," they whispered. "How can Juri like Shiori? That girl's so plain and witless." However, none of these girls actually approached Juri. After school, Juri would often study by the fountain, not talking to any one unless Shiori could be found to communicate to. Ruka had his own life to contend with: a growing popularity among the girls, awe inspiring to the boys. He was usually invited to dorms by women and to play games with boys. He took advantage of all of it.
"Do you ever wish you were me?" Ruka once asked Juri after practice.
"What would I do with you're body? It's too slow."
"How cruel. I could take you with me, you know. Doing normal teenager stuff. If you ever wanted to interact with me outside fencing."
"Would you want me to?"
Drawing closer to her, with a look of mock amazement, he said, "My my. I think we've actually become friends."
The next day, Ruka was absent from school. When Kira-sempai asked them to pair up, Juri was left utterly alone. She was used being alone, but she was also used to having Ruka there. She stood still in the middle of the grouping freshman, everyone staring at her.
"We do have an odd number today, so I'll pair up with somebody," Kira-sempai said. He began to walk over to Juri when a boy stopped him.
"I'll be partners with Arisugawa-san. It's okay." The brown haired boy abandoned his other usual partner and came over to stand beside Juri. He was just barely taller than her, a single strand of unruly hair hanging in his green eyes. "You don't mind, do you?"
"Not if you don't."
"My name's Hideki Anou."
"Arisugawa Juri."
"I know."
Hideki wasn't a master swordsman, but he held his own. He was friendly, but in a manner completely different from Ruka: it was not predatory. Hideki was pleasant and open, and did not tease her. It was nice having some one different to be with, even if he wasn't a match for her skill.
After class, she continued to talk with Hideki. Shiori approached them quietly and introduced herself. "Ah!" Hideki exclaimed. "You're Shiori. The guys were right. You are very cute."
"Oh, thank you," Shiori murmured, turning pink. Juri scoffed
"Are you two going to the ball?" Both Juri and Shiori looked at him questioningly. "You don't know? It's in the Physics building tomorrow night. Full on Grande Ball. Everybody's going. I bet you both would look beautiful in dresses."
Walking back to the dorms, Shiori asked Juri about the ball. "We could go. Everyone would love to see you in a gown."
"I don't have one."
"I have one for you. Come to my dorm and I'll show you. It'd look wonderful!"
Shiori had a dorm room all to herself because of her late admittance. The sign on the door read Shiori in Hiragana with a little heart next to it. The room was covered in stuffed animals and anime posters of pretty bishoujo in short skirts backed by strong bishounen. Her closet was full of frills and ruffles that seemed to expand every time she removed an outfit, trying to find the one she wanted. "Dang! I know I have in here somewhere. It belonged to my mother, it's too big for me, but it would fit you like a glove. I want you to look elegant and adult, all the boys would go wild!"
Juri glanced at the stuffed bunnies and bears that lined her bed, staring at her with beady eyes that flashed maliciously. In the middle, buried behind a giant Hello Kitty, there was a very small brown teddy bear. Picking it from the sea of fuzzy monsters, its velvet fur was sticky and dirty.
"I found the dress." Juri turned around to see Shiori holding up an elegant white silk evening gown. It was long sleeved with a ruffled v-shaped neckline. The sleeves also ended in ruffled cuffs. "I see you found Bi-chan. Remember when you gave him to me?"
"No, I don't."
"I know you do. I was crying because Akira, the bully in the second grade, had told me I was ugly. You gave me this and told me you thought I was very pretty."
"I remember. I stole it from the toy shop because I didn't have any money."
"You were very brave." The smaller girl held up the dress to Juri. "I knew it was perfect. Do you like it?"
"Yes, it's very beautiful."
"You can't try it on now, if you stay here any longer you won't have time to get back to you dorm before curfew. Take it with you. I'll get a plastic bag." While Shiori went looking, Juri carefully replaced the little bear. "Here you go." It was a small Sanrio bag. "Now we have to go to the ball tomorrow. Meet me here at eight?"
"All right."
Juri moved to the door and put her hand on the knob. Small pale arms encircled her waist, tightening around her abdomen. Shiori's body pressed up against Juri's back with a ruffling of fabric. The bigger girl froze. Shiori's small head nuzzled up against Juri's neck, like a puppy. She hid her face in the golden girls and hugged Juri very tightly. Heat seemed to flow from the smaller body, trying to melt the larger one. "See you at eight. I'll look really pretty." Her voice was small even next to Juri's ear.
"Okay," Juri replied weakly.
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Ruka was back in fencing class the next day. "Were you worried about me?"
"Where were you?"
"Were you worried?" He repeated.
"Can you still swordfight?"
"Of course."
"Then that's all I need to know."
"You missed me, didn't you?"
"Hurry up and fight me."
Ruka was just a little slower than before, as if he was sore from an extreme work out the day before. Juri won easily. Ruka found himself lying on the floor of the gym, gasping for breath.
"What's wrong with you?" Juri demanded, glaring down at him.
He sighed and leaned his head back against the cold floor. "If I was to suddenly disappear, would you miss me?"
"Don't ask silly questions."
"I think you would." He began to get up.
"Nobody else could fight me like you do."
"True, true."
"Arisugawa!" Kira-sempai called out. "Ruka was just in the hospital, go easy on him!"
Ruka got up and assumed the fighting stance.
"You could have told me about your sickness." She mimicked him.
"Do you plan to go the ball tonight?"
"Yes."
"Yes? Do you have a date?"
"None of your business."
"I'll be there, in case you want one."
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The bright lights of Ohtori drowned out the stars even after the sun had set two hours before. The whole campus lay in hibernation, waiting for the tolling of the bell to announce the beginning of the ball. Juri dawned the silk evening gown. It flowed easily over her supple body and dragged on the floor when she moved. A pair of earrings her father had given her when she was younger graced her ears and winked at her from beyond the mirror. Juri did look like an older woman, not young, but experienced. A little before eight she was called down to the center dorm office to accept a phone call. There was only one phone line allowed in the dorm and it was usually in the constant use of a certain girl on the upper floor with a boyfriend in America.
The coldness of the receiver jolted her back into the immediate reality. "Juri-san?"
"Shiori?"
"You'll never guess the good news. I found a date!"
Juri's nails bit into her palm. "That's wonderful."
"I know! He's picking me up at eight. I'll see you at the ball, okay?"
"Who is he?"
"Saionji Kyouichi. He's here right now! Gotta go!" The line went dead.
Juri robotically hung up the phone. The bells tolled telling all of the campus they were now welcome in the main ballroom in the physics hall. Girls danced out of their rooms to meet their dates waiting for them outside, the stairway was a continuous stream of color and jewelry for several minutes. She watched all this with moderate fascination for a few moments and eventually removed herself from the dorm building by way of the back door. By now the campus was drained of its students that had been sucked up by the ball.
Finding herself a cool fountain to sit by, Juri breathed in the cold, misty air, arching her back to look at the gray sky. No, no stars at all. The coldness of wet marble of the fountain easily made it's way through the silk, causing her to shiver and close her eyes.
The sound of footsteps came from her right. She turned to see a long legged older man stalking his way over towards her, his thin ponytail gently dancing from side to side. "Do you like the view?" His voice was incredibly deep, resonating down within the wide expanse of his chest.
"There aren't any stars."
"There will be later tonight, once the ball is over. And if there isn't any then, there might've been a better excuse for my planetarium than I thought."
"Planetarium?" The older man had a dark completion that combated with his silver hair.
"Yes. They're re-installing it the Ohtori tower currently."
"Re-installing?"
"There was another one, but it wasn't big enough. Are you planning to go to the ball?"
"I don't believe so."
"That's unfortunate. I, however, must attend. I'm making a guest appearance."
"Good bye."
"I'll see you around." The man slowly passed her, leaving behind him a faint scent of roses.
Juri lay herself down on the edge of the fountain, being careful not to get her dress in the water. Shiori had a date. With a boy. There was no reason for Juri to go to the ball. She could stay here for the rest of the night and it wouldn't matter. Nothing mattered. Hah! She actually got herself all dressed up. What a stupid dolt she was. As if Shiori would really want to go the ball with her. Really. What a stupid fucking moron she was. Why would Shiori even like her any way? All she cared about was fencing, nothing else. Nothing else mattered. Except Shiori.
"You're not crying, are you?"
Juri jerked herself upwards to see Ruka staring at her with a perturbed expression. She quickly began wiping her face on her sleeve, hiding behind her mane of curls.
"Didn't fancy you the type to cry." He sat down next to her, concerned. After she had finished with her sleeve, she still kept her head down, not looking up at him. Ruka figured she didn't want to respond. "I was looking all over for you at the ball. I expected to see you with an extremely hot date. When I didn't find you, I left my extremely hot date and decided to come and pester you. Now you're all unhappy and I can't annoy you. Damn. What happened? Did you get dumped?"
"No." She said.
"Ah! She speaks! But 'no'? You didn't have a date to begin with?"
"No."
"Then why are you out here?"
"I have no one to go with."
"Somehow, I find that extremely unlikely. Also, I don't think that's the reason you're upset. It must be something more than that. You won't tell me? Fine. But you must know, if you don't, I'll find out some other way and I'll do something drastic to rectify it. And I don't think you'll like my methods."
"Why are you always around me?" She asked.
He gave her a puzzled look. "Isn't it obvious? Because I like you." Then he smiled that smile, leaving his eyes to crease up and disappear into his dark eyelashes.
"You only like me because of my ability with the sword."
"I want to show you something," he said, standing up.
"Huh?"
"C'mon!" He grabbed her hand, pulling her up and along with him. For a moment he pulled Juri against him, his stiff suit rustling. "You're not afraid of me, are you?"
She growled. "I'm not afraid of anything."
"We'll see if you'll ever become afraid of me. In time." Juri found herself being pulled along by her arm, Ruka almost tearing it off at the pace he kept. They wound between fountains, foliage, and buildings, to the opposite side of the campus. Moonlight highlighted the dew on the grass and gleamed in Ruka's hair. When they reached a point on campus that Juri had never seen before, Ruka finally let up and stopped.
Juri saw they had reached a porch of some kind overlooking a magnificent view of the city, which sparkled like raw diamonds in the night. Criss-crosses of marble grew from the terrace, overshadowing a small white bench.
"Nobody comes to this side of the campus. It's too far off from the classrooms. These buildings are just storage. C'mon, let's sit down." Ruka lead her over to the bench. The wood was cool against her skin.
They said nothing for a while, and just gazed at the city below. The headlights of cars traversed the main streets below, making rivers of light on a giant grid.
"Have you ever been down there?" Ruka asked. "To the city?"
"No."
"I can't remember if I have. Sometimes it seems Ohtori is all there is in the world, all that ever was."
"Do you like it that much here?"
"Not particularly. Do you?"
"No."
"No, you don't like it here?"
"No, I don't like it or hate it." Juri was here, why would she bother to wish she were somewhere else?
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"You don't like it or hate it. Do you like anything? Do you hate anything? Do you love anything?" Ruka eyed her questioningly.
"I enjoy fencing."
"Why?"
"You're asking too many questions."
"Okay then. I'll tell you what I think." Ruka leaned in closer to her, his lips next to her ear; his breathe making her earring bob. "You like fencing because you like using your body. You like the way it feels to move fast and attack. You like it because you're good at it."
"Is there anything wrong with that?"
"I suppose not. But do you want to become the best at it?"
"I am the best."
"Have you forgotten that I beat you?" Juri turned to glare at him and found herself face to face with him, their noses brushing. Ruka's eyes were of a darker blue than his hair, black sapphires hidden under thick lashes. "I think you have the potential to become better than me." He kept his voice loud, choosing to ignore the proximity of her face. "But I don't understand what holds you back."
Juri turned away to face the lights of the city and Ruka did the same. They said nothing for a while, each deciding to ignore the presence of the other. The lights twinkled below them, almost like a sea of stars. Juri briefly felt a moment of vertigo, as if the sky were below her and the ground above.
"Would you ever open up to me?" Ruka asked, not turning to look at her.
"Haven't I given you enough?"
"No." He said it as if it were obvious, angry that she didn't know it.
"Want do you want from me?" She asked.
Ruka paused, and for a moment seemed unsure. He regained his composure and stiffened. "Why do you let me near you? Is it just because you're so indifferent to me it's too much of a bother to push me away. I'll go away if you want me to. I'll leave; I won't talk to you anymore. Is that what you want?"
Juri's eyes glazed over. She couldn't understand why Ruka became emotional like this. She kept her voice level as she spoke: "You still haven't said what you want from me."
Ruka turned to face her, and when she didn't respond, he took her chin and forced her to look him in the face. She complied merely because she didn't want to upset him more.
"You. I want you. Can't you tell?"
She stared at him, her feelings kept behind the mask of her face, his clear in the intensity of his eyes. A wave of indigo hair caressed her cheek. His grip softened on her chin and he brought a finger to her lips, gently brushing against them. His skin felt like velvet, gently pressing against her. Hesitating, his gaze drifted from her eyes to her mouth. His breath came faster, hot. Crinkles appeared on his forehead in concentration, as if to keep himself in check. Juri didn't lean forward or away. Ruka moved in closer, bringing his lips to hers.
Did you honestly expect me to let you have me?
"Stop".
He froze, staying where his was, lips on the verge of touching, and moved away.
"I'm going now," she said, her voice lacking any emotion. "Good night".
Ruka avoided her gaze as she stood up. Juri wrapped her arms around herself as she walked away, trying to keep the coldness from the gnawing at her.
"Don't forget that I admitted to it!" He called out after her, angry and alone. "I won't do it again! I won't try and get close to you again! Things will stay the same! But I want you to remember that I admitted to it!"
Juri didn't look back.
When Juri reached her dorm, she was welcomed at her door by a beset Shiori, eyes red with crying, her gloves wet with tears. When Juri had soothed her to the point of understandable speech, she learned the date had gone the way of the Roman Empire. The boy had spent the entire time fussing over his best friend, annoyed at the company of women the best friend had brought with him. Shiori had spent the evening ignored and lonely, wandering around looking for Juri and hiding in the corner.
Juri kissed the tears away, cooing compliments of Shiori's prettiness into her ear. That night Juri expelled her roommate from the dorm, forcing her to (unlawfully) bunk with her boyfriend, and let Shiori spend the night in the lower bunk. Juri listened to Shiori's quiet breathing, in and out, until it lulled her to sleep.