Is There More?
Author: Knowhere
Chapter 9: Approval
Rating: Pg-13
Disclaimer: Zero, Zilch, Zip.
AN: Thanks for staying with me all this time. I really appreciate all of you taking the time to read this. When I started to write fan fiction, I swore to myself that lack of reviews would not cease my writing because I know there are people who just like to lurk, and yet read everything…actually, I'm one of those people; but all these reviews have made me so freaking happy and it makes writing easier and faster. So, thanks again for your enthusiasm.
FYI: Important: For those who read chapter 8 as soon as I had posted will have read the version in which I accidentally named Jess's new girlfriend Kate. I had not noticed that I also named Tyler's best friend the same…Jess's new gal's name has been changed to JILL. Note the change, or it might get a little confusing.
Summary: AU. College life is a journey of ups and downs; are Rory and Jess ready to take on what life is about to throw at them including a prospect of a new relationship, or will they choose the path of friendship like they did years ago? Literati.
I can't move. My feet are nailed to the ground. This is not happening; my world is not spinning away from me just as I was able to figure things out. How could I screw up so badly?
"Rory? Hey, you okay?" Jess seems pretty concerned about me and I decide to put up a good face just as long as she's here.
"Oh, yeah. Sorry, I just kinda spaced out there. I'm sorry, what was your name again?" Yep, that's good Rory…make yourself look like a fool in front of Jess's new girlfriend.
I see him wrapping an arm around her waist as she steps forward extending a hand of friendship towards me. "I'm Jill." She smiles oh-so sweetly at me and I can't help but think that she's unlike any other girl Jess has ever dated. She actually seems friendly and seems like someone I would get along with.
I shake her hand and try to smile through the tears that are building up at the back of my throat. "Hi, it's nice to meet you."
I drop her hand as gently as possible and I rock back and forth on my heels trying to think of something to say. I glance over at Jess and he just seems so happy. Why must he seem so happy with her? "So, how long have you and Jess been friends? He's told me so much about you; he just couldn't wait for us to meet." I hate how she's so realistically sincere.
"Oh, Rory and I have been friends for five years now." He walks over and places his arm around my shoulder, "Anyways, I just wanted you to meet my best friend. We better get going, Jill, we don't wanna be late for the movie." Just as soon as he placed his arm on me, it's gone just as fast.
"Right; you guys don't wanna miss the previews. 'Cause I've heard that there are some pretty good previews going on the movies now…you better get going or else the popcorn might be stale and you know how bad popcorn can throw off a good movie…" I trail off as they give me a quick wave and they shut the door behind them.
Was I just rambling about previews and bad popcorn to them? God, I'm lame.
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"So, you just stood there like an idiot in front of the new girl?"
"I didn't just stand like an idiot…I talked, I rambled."
"Oh, Rory. I'm sorry this is happening but look on the bright side."
Disbelief enters my voice as I speak into the handset, "What bright side, Mom? I think this is the darkest side there is. There is no sun, there is no light…nothing!"
"Calm down honey; I'm sure I can find a bright side here somewhere. Um, I'm thinking…let me just put on my thinking cap here. Oh, I've got it! When they break up, you'll be the shoulder that he leans on. And in the mean time, you can observe him to see if he's boyfriend material and if you really are in love with him." She sounds proud; I can hear the smile that's radiating through the phone. "Oh, I'm sorry to cut you off Rory, but I have to get to work okay? Call me tonight or something and we can sit and watch You've Got Mail and wish how all the men are as charming as Mr. F-O-X."
"Sure Mom. See ya." I'm feeling a little bit better now. Maybe Mom was right, I could be just blowing this new relationship out of proportion; Jess has never had a real long-lasting relationship, why should this one be any different than all the other girls that he's been with?
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"Ror? Rory?" I groggily open my eyes and I see that Jess is hovering over me with the t.v remote in his hand. I must have fallen asleep after the movie and the extremely long chat with Mom. "Hey there. You better go to your bed or else tomorrow you're going to have a bad kink in your neck."
As I'm sitting up he scoots me over and relaxes on the couch with me. I take a moment to take in what he's wearing and I can't help my let my thoughts and eyes wander all over his body. His hair is messy in the usual way, and his black jacket does nothing to hide the fact that he works out. He seems really comfy in the casual jeans and the black Converses that adorn his feet. Well, at least I know he didn't take Jill to some fancy place for an impressive swanky dinner or something.
"So, what do you think of Jill?" This is my chance; maybe if I tell him what's really on my mind, he'll forget all about Jill since that relationship is so new.
I try to gather up my courage to tell him that I love him and to forget about his new girlfriend. I glance up into his eyes to begin my speech and then it happens. I see that he's really happy. I've never really seen Jess quite as delighted as I do now. My heart breaks at the thought that I might dispel the joy that he has by saying a couple of words. I just can't do it. I love Jess, but he was my friend first, and I just can't hurt him like that. I lie through my teeth once again as I utter the painful words, "I think she's great."
His face lights up with excitement as he received my approval. "That's great Ror. I'm so glad that you like her; it'd be really hard if my best friend didn't get along with my girlfriend. Thanks Rory, this means a lot to me." He gives me a hug and a quick kiss on the cheek silently thanking me again for accepting his new relationship. As we lean back on the couch, he turns on some late night talk show and I look over at him and see that his smile has not left his face. He shifts his head and throws me a glance and says, "Thanks for being a great friend, I love you Rory."
I love you too Jess. I'm smiling at him, but I know I'm doing nothing but crying on the inside. I think Jess is actually in love; and then I come to the sad conclusion that I want him to be happy, and if Jill is the one that makes him happy, then I'll let her be the lucky one to be by his side.
AN: More to come, don't worry. Keep reading. For the You've Got Mail reference: for those that haven't seen the movie, Tom Hanks' character has a really young half brother (or something to that degree) and this little kid spells out his last name to Meg Ryan, and all he does for a couple of minutes is say, F-O-X. It's a pretty comical scene.