Original characters, world and backstory belong to Squaresoft, lucky folks.
This version has been censored to R-rating in line with ffnet policy; the full version is at my website, http:www.scribblemoose.co.uk
Feedback very welcome, here or by e-mail (fanfic@scribblemoose.co.uk)
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Memories 37 - Waves
Rinoa was already calling Leviathan as Irvine ran out of the cave and onto the beach. He heard the rush of water as she flooded the rock, the crash of ice as Shiva froze it in seconds, blasting the cave mouth to pieces. There was a loud rumble of new boulders settling into place, and then quiet, except for the pull of the ocean, and the distant sound of fighting.
Irvine buried his face in Frila's hair, listening to her breathe as if expecting her to stop any minute, dimly aware of Selphie calling his name.
"It's alright, Selph, she's alive," Rinoa was explaining.
The link was still fresh; Squall and Rinoa had been with him, he realised. They knew. Amazed relief was coming off them in waves, they didn't dare believe this any more than he did.
"Are you okay?" He whispered in her ear. "Are you really okay?"
"Yes," she whispered back, laughing suddenly, warming his heart. She pulled back to look at him properly. "Yes, I am."
"What happened? I tried to cure you but…" Irvine's best guess so far was that the curatives had just taken a while to work.
"Oceanus sent me back," she tried to explain, knowing it sounded impossible. Then there were other arms round her: Rinoa and Selphie, hugging her and Irvine all at once.
She heard a familiar squeak of leather and thought for a moment that Squall was going to join in, but he just put a hand to her shoulder and squeezed, with a murmur of "welcome back, Hotshot," before wandering off up the beach a little ways, radio in hand.
Squall Leonhart had called her Hotshot.
She was still coming to terms with that when Irvine told her Bane was gone, Chet dead. Squall jogged back to tell them the battle was all but over: the Dians were about to retreat.
She blinked, trying to understand what all this meant.
"Are you really alright?" asked Irvine again.
"Yes," she said. "I'm fine. We can talk later. I need to go and find Sanke."
"Sanke?" Irvine frowned. "Why?"
"It's a long story," said Frila, "but I made a promise, and I need to see her." She turned to Squall. "Can I?"
"Don't see why not," said Squall. "Is Oceanus…"
"Oceanus is dead," she said, her voice flat.
"I'm sorry," said Squall, obviously itching to ask questions, but somehow restraining himself. "Report to Quistis when you get to Garden; she'll debrief you. Get yourself checked out by the Doc, alright?"
She nodded.
"You too, Selphie," he added. "You're off duty. We can manage this."
"But Squall…"
"Go see Xu," he said, gruffly.
Selphie flashed him a warm smile, and might have hugged him, had he not already turned away to fiddle urgently with some part of his gunblade.
Irvine suddenly realised he was required to let go of the warm body in his arms, and he wasn't entirely sure he could. He hugged her tight until she pulled herself away, smiling at him, touching his face with gentle fingers. "Later," she whispered. "I'll come to your room."
Irvine nodded. He suddenly noticed that Squall and Rinoa were already striding up the beach towards the remains of the battle, and felt a pang of anxiety. He gave Frila one last hug, and headed after them at a jog.
Selphie watched them, with an unpleasant sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach all of a sudden, the lurch of a memory.
"Come on Hotshot," she said, reaching out for Frila's hand. "Let's go see what miracle they pulled out of the bag this time, eh?"
Frila followed her back to Garden.
* * * * * * *
With one blast of magical fire, Rinoa convinced the last of the Dians to flee to the ocean, even though the tunnel they'd emerged from had long-since collapsed, and apparently they didn't swim very well. Once again the medical teams were fully stretched, all junctioned SeeDs assisting with healing magic. Squall, Rinoa and Irvine worked together, dipping back into their link to cure ten, twenty casualties at a time, until Ether was too drained to produce magic any longer. Even then Squall and Rinoa continued with the other Guardians. Irvine stayed with them, until finally the last truck had left the beach, the last squad gone back to Garden, and it was just the three of them and the patrol that had been assigned to watch the beach, just in case the Dians were stupid enough to come back for more.
"I guess we should go back," said Rinoa, scrubbing at her bare leg with her knuckles to remove a bit of dried-on pink goo. "Don't know about you guys, but I could really use a shower."
"Yeah," agreed Irvine. "And I want to go check on Frila."
"I want to go check the cave entrance before I go back," said Squall. "Just to be sure. You guys go ahead."
"Nah, that's okay," said Rinoa, quickly. "Let's all go."
It just felt right to Irvine, to go with them.
They walked down the beach together, leaving the remains of the carnage behind them for the pale, untarnished sand that could have been a hundred miles away from the battlefield. The cave was just as they'd left it, sealed with rubble. The tide was nearly all the way in, leaving just a few feet of pale Balamb sand between surf and cliff.
"I'll get a squad down here tomorrow to seal this properly," said Squall, casting one final scan spell to be certain. "But there's no sign of life."
"Good," said Rinoa, with feeling. "Gods, I'm tired all of a sudden. And my feet hurt." She sat down on the sand, and started to untie her boots.
"It's the link," said Irvine. "You've used a fuck of a lot of energy. I guess Gemini must be all done in. I know Ether is. Here, let me help." He knelt behind her, and started to knead her shoulders with his talented fingers.
Squall helped her take off her boots, and worked on her ankles.
Rinoa closed her eyes, and let herself relax. "Mmm… feels good…" she murmured, leaning back into Irvine's massage, wiggling her toes.
Irvine smiled, and without thinking, bent to kiss her neck.
Squall ran his hand up her leg to her thigh, rubbing the strong muscles with his thumb.
She arched her back a little, stretching her arms above her head, her breasts thrust forward. It was still dark, and Irvine couldn't see Squall's face properly in the low light that floated down from Garden, still perched on the cliff top. But he could catch his friend's contentment through the remains of the link.
Ether hummed softly in the back of his mind.
Rinoa tangled her fingers in Squall's hair, and drew his face close for a kiss. Irvine watched, thinking he should leave them, go back to Garden and find Frila… Squall broke his and Rinoa's kiss and caught Irvine's gaze, and suddenly Irvine didn't want to leave any more.
Squall looked at him, cloudy eyes smouldering in the scant light, shadowed by the messy hair that tumbled over his face.
"Squall…?" breathed Irvine, uncertainly.
~Ether. It's Ether.~
"Irvine."
Squall leaned over Rinoa's shoulder, and brushed his lips against Irvine's.
A thrill shot up Irvine's spine; he tangled his fingers in Squall's hair and kissed him back with a passion, thrusting his tongue in his friend's mouth, and when he paused it was only to find the same pleasure with Rinoa, each of them taking turns to kiss each other.
Rinoa pulled her vest over her head; Irvine deftly helped her out of her bra, while Squall stripped her shorts and underwear over her hips and down her sleek legs. Her skin still glowed with the after-effects of Gemini's magic; she looked stunningly beautiful. Again he kissed her, feeling Ether's power growing, thriving on their need, the pleasure they were giving each other. She struggled to free first Irvine and then Squall from their clothes, with only bare co-operation from either, both intent on each others' bodies, stroking firm chests, mouths locked together, hardness pressing to hardness. Finally naked, the three of them fell back on the sand, the gentle surf teasing their feet.
* * * * * * *
"Looks like we found him," whispered Duck.
Zephyr followed her gaze to a writhing heap of bodies just ahead of them.
Zephyr's face broke into a broad grin, partly amusement, but mostly relief.
"Who's that he's with?" mused Duck. "Has he got rid of the little redhead already?"
Zephyr fought to keep himself from laughing; they were close enough to be heard in the still night air. "If I'm not mistaken," he tilted his head to one side to confirm his suspicions in the dim light, "that's the Commander of Balamb Garden and his Sorceress."
"Well fuck me si…" Duck found herself silenced by Zephyr's palm across her mouth, and resumed in a whisper. "..sideways. Leonhart? Again? That's not fair. I want him. Do you think we could…"
Zef held her back with a firm arm around her middle, and kissed her neck. "Not this time, lover. Maybe one day. But seeing as we've found Shotgun, and we know he's safe… what d'you say we go to bed and celebrate another escape from a certain and slimy death? I heard a rumour they were giving out champagne in Balamb cafeteria."
Duck grinned, and ruffled his hair.
"Just this once, then," she said. "But I'll have words with Shotgun about this, you see if I don't. He has to learn to share."
Zephyr kissed her adorable, pouting, lips, and led her back to Garden.
* * * * * * *
Frila made her way down the corridor towards the Infirmary, pleased to have escaped the excursion to the cafeteria reasonably unscathed. Quistis had been getting very drunk, and displaying her affection for her colleagues in a way that Frila was certain an impressionable cadet shouldn't be witnessing. Quistis had been especially intent on Laguna, for some reason. Probably because he seemed to have taken it into his head to look after her, and try to swap her champagne for fizzy water when she wasn't looking. A brave man indeed.
She was fairly certain that Quistis wouldn't remember Frila reporting back to her in the morning, but never mind. She'd followed her orders, and now she and Selphie were off to the infirmary at last, Selphie on the trail of Xu, who had been helping the Doc care for the wounded, and herself to take a good look at her new responsibility.
She caught a flash of Galbadian uniform out of the corner of her eye, and recognised Zef.
"Hotshot!" he said, delightedly. "Glad you made it."
She smiled at him, and took his proffered hand to shake. "So am I," she murmured, just as she spotted Duck, a little behind him. "Sorry, I've got to go," she said. "But I'm glad you're alright."
He nodded and moved on, Duck following with an outrageous wink which Frila scowled at.
"Who's that?" asked Selphie, curiously.
"Irvine's friends from Galbadia," said Frila, "Zephyr and Duck…"
"Oh, that's Zephyr and Duck," said Selphie with a knowing grin. "I always wondered what they looked like, Irvine never had photos…"
Duck's voice drifted back down the corridor as they moved away, and Frila caught her name.
"Poor Hotshot. You don't suppose she knows Shotgun's cheating on her down on the beach, with our glorious commander and his little witch?"
Frila's cheeks were suddenly hot, her head was spinning, and she could see by Selphie's expression that she'd heard, too.
Duck's voice faded to laughter as she and Zef disappeared down the hall.
"Frila," said Selphie, gently. "You shouldn't…"
Frila stopped in her tracks, fists clenched at her sides. "How could he…"
"No," said Selphie. "It's not like that. I'm sure it's not. Look, my quarters are just down here. Come with me. Let me explain."
"You're going to say it's Ether," said Frila. "Like it was when he cheated on you." She took a deep breath. "You're going to tell me Ether made him do it."
Selphie looked a little surprised. "Well… yes," she admitted. "But it's true. Irvine thinks the world of you. You saved his life. He wouldn't do this unless…"
Frila shook her head. "It's not the same," she said. "He didn't know about Ether back then. He does now. Ether can't make him do what he doesn't want to do."
"But… Frila, there's a lot of things we don't understand about Guardians. Until today we didn't think they could junction you against your will, but believe me, they can." The shadow of remembered fear in Selphie's eyes underlined her point. "It wasn't just any old battle for any of them, and the link was so intense. I know how you feel," she said. "I just don't want you to make the same mistake I made. Please. At least wait until you've heard his side of it."
"No," said Frila. "It's not the same." He loved you. He really, really loved you. That was the difference.
"But… come to my quarters. We should talk about this."
Frila shoved a hand roughly through her hair. "No," she said. "I can't think about this now. I need to go and see Sanke. That's all."
"Okay." Selphie squeezed her arm gently. "But please, don't do anything rash. Give him a chance. Hear his side of things. Please? For me?"
She was surprised to see the longing in Selphie's eyes, as if she really did regret losing Irvine, after all.
"You're happy with Xu," she said. "Aren't you?"
Selphie looked startled by this sudden change in conversation, and took her hand away from Frila's arm. "Yes," she said, after a longer pause than Frila had expected. "Of course, yes. But that doesn't mean… if it hadn't happened, if I hadn't left Irvine…" She shook her head impatiently. "I don't believe in ifs. I want to be with Xu more than anything. I just don't want you to make the mistakes I made. That's all."
Frila looked down at her feet, trying to stop the maelstrom of thoughts surging through her mind.
"Thanks," she said, a little awkwardly.
"Hyne, listen to me," said Selphie, her voice returning to its usual light tone. "I sound like I'm your mother. Take no notice, girl. I'm sure you can make your own decisions. Now, let's go see what you've let yourself in for, eh?"
She set off down the corridor towards the infirmary, and Frila fell into step beside her.
* * * * * * *
Rinoa kissed whatever flesh she came across, feeling it all, feeling Squall's fingers around Irvine's cock, Irvine's teeth nibbling Squall's neck; her own body thrumming with expectant pleasure. A hand reached out, Squall's, she thought, although it was getting increasingly difficult to tell, and felt between her legs; Irvine rolled over to kiss her, and yes, it was Squall between her legs, touching her exactly how she wanted to be touched, knowing, knowing, knowing… his lips replaced Irvine's, and then he was rolling her over on top of him, the head of his cock at her entrance, nudging inside her. She squeezed him with her thighs and slid down on him as the sea splashed across her back and over her shoulders, drenching them both.
"You okay?" she peered anxiously at him, dimly aware that something had changed, but not knowing exactly what. He was soaked, long, wet hair clinging to his face, water beading on his ivory skin, eyes blinking from the shock of the water. He was, quite possibly, the sexiest thing she'd ever seen.
He laughed, spluttering brine. "Oh yeah." He licked his lips. "Sea water. Of all the kinds of water to get dripping wet with, the ocean's my favourite."
She laughed with him, and dipped her head to taste for herself.
Irvine watched them as he finished dressing, shaking the worst of the sand out of his hat before perching it back on his head. He took one last look as Rinoa started to move her hips in slow circles, long dark hair clinging wetly to her naked back. They were lost in each other, Squall gently caressing the sides of her breasts with his fingertips, smiling at her, his eyes closing briefly from time to time with pure pleasure. They looked so beautiful together. He bit his lip, yearning so strongly to be with them, but just as sure that there was too much at stake. The love Squall and Rinoa had finally found with each other, Frila… the newly-discovered memory of the last time was sharp and bitter sweet in his head, a temptation and a deterrent all at once.
Irvine smiled, and walked away, Ether grumbling loudly in his head.
By the time they noticed, he was long gone.
* * * * * * *
She looked so young.
Frila sat on the edge of the bed, and took one frail hand in hers. Sanke's fingers curled gently into Frila's palm, and she sighed, without waking, a tiny smile on her face. She looked calm, contented, peaceful. Frila traced the crystal-scar on her fragile wrist, contemplating the twist of fate that had taken Risha's life and liberated Sanke's. If Xu hadn't loved Selphie, if Bane hadn't been in that crystal, if Chet hadn't wanted to breed Guardians…
She looked so fragile.
Frila cast her eyes over the pictures on the wall next to the bed.
If she hadn't thought to give up the gunblade…
If she hadn't wanted Irvine Kinneas… or let him break her heart…
If she hadn't run to the beach and found Oceanus…
Frila leaned over and kissed Sanke's hair. It felt soft and clean, and rather than the antiseptic smell of infirmary pillow that Frila had expected, it carried the faint scent of the ocean.
She snuggled into Frila's touch with a sigh.
"Shield…" she murmured.
"Yes," Frila whispered back. "I'm here."
* * * * * * *
Squall lost himself in Rinoa's soft, wet body, all thoughts of Irvine forgotten. His feet flat on the shifting sand, knees raised, he flexed his hips to meet her as she rode him. Her head was thrown back, her full, firm breasts bouncing, her skin gleaming, stretched taut over lean muscles.
When the next wave hit, she pulled him up to sitting, wrapping her legs around his waist and changing to a grinding rhythm, draping her arms over his shoulders, growling triumph.
He pulled her head close to his and kissed her deeply, thrusting as deeply inside her as he could, drowning in her hot, wet mouth. She hitched in her breath and her body went impossibly tense for a long moment, before another wave broke over them, and she came, clenching around him, holding him tight and biting into his shoulder. The sand shifted underneath them as the tide pulled back, the water tugging at their bodies. Squall locked his mouth on hers, clutching handfuls of her hair in his long fingers, plunging deeply inside of her as the roar of the ocean filled his ears and his mind. There was a moment of quiet, of stillness, as he felt his body pause on the brink, and then he was coming, filling her, spurting over and over inside her.
The next wave crashed over their heads, reaching all the way to the cliff behind them now, the last wave, the furthest wave, the longest reach, before the tide retreated.
* * * * * * *
Frila wrapped her hair in a large towel, and peered in her closet. She didn't want to turn on the light for fear of waking Kellon, but it was hard to find specific items in a dark, untidy cupboard, especially when most of her clothes were black.
She tripped over something that was probably her boots, and swore.
"You can put the light on," her room-mate sighed. "I'm awake."
"Sorry," said Frila, turning on the desk light with an apologetic grin. "I was trying to be quiet."
"You don't do quiet," said Kellon, rubbing her eyes sleepily with the heels of her hands. "Where are you going, anyway? Did you kill anything today? And, by the way, glad you're still alive."
Frila smiled, thinking how odd that sounded, considering what had happened. She didn't want to stop and explain right now, though. In fact she wasn't sure she should tell anyone just yet. She had a feeling there were some parts of the story that Squall might decide shouldn't be spread around.
"No, I didn't kill anything," she said. "Did a bit of damage, is all. And I'm going out."
"Where? You've got someone, haven't you? Oh, come on, Frila, I know you have. That creepy Almasy guy was dropping some pretty big hints yesterday."
"Kind of," Frila admitted, poking about in the closet and producing a slightly faded T-shirt, a pair of old, worn jeans and a broad leather belt.
"Frila…" Kellon growled, hooking strands of wine-coloured hair behind her ears. "I'm your friend, even if I haven't seen much of you for the past fortnight. Tell."
Frila dropped her towel and started to dress. "Alright, then, yes. I've been seeing someone." It felt surreal, having what appeared to be a perfectly normal conversation all of a sudden. Only a couple of weeks ago she and Kellon had shared their lives in a steady rhythm of conversation and affection, as they had done from the day they arrived at Garden together. Yet since she'd met Irvine it was as if Kellon had ceased to exist. Her best friend was completely oblivious to the biggest events of her life. She'd not realised how much she'd missed it, this normality.
"Who?" Kellon bounced excitedly. "Who is it? It's not that guy with the pinky hair, is it? Only he's wanted you for the longest…"
"No, I can't tell you. It's no-one you know, not personally."
"Oh, please," Kellon wheedled. "Please? Your secret's safe with me, I promise. I stuck up for you with Almasy and everything, didn't I? Come on, please…"
Frila pulled her 'gunbladers do it in leather' T-shirt over her head, a mischievous smile appearing on her lips. After all, he was supposed to have been a trophy fuck, and his friends knew… and it was so lonely, not being able to tell anyone. And she'd had one hell of a day…
"Please?" Kellon was looking at her with wide, puppy dog eyes.
"It's Irvine Kinneas," said Frila, enjoying the moment.
Kellon squealed. "Captain Kinneas? No! Really?"
"You mustn't tell anyone," Frila said, suddenly panicked now the thrill of confession was fading. "We'd get chucked out. And anyway… it's just a… just one of those things, alright?"
Kellon nodded, grinning broadly. "'Course. I knew there was something, but… wow. Is he as good as they say he is?"
Frila failed to suppress a grin, twisting round to thread her belt through the loops of her jeans. "You wouldn't believe how good he is," she said. "And I shouldn't be having this conversation." She buckled her belt swiftly, and shook the towel from her head. "In fact, I haven't had this conversation, okay? You tell anyone and I'll just claim you made it all up." She tipped her head forwards so her hair hung upside down, and started to pull a comb through it.
"I wouldn't do that," said Kellon, a bit peeved. "I really am your friend, you know, whatever you think. So, is it serious?"
Frila laughed. I died for him. How serious can you get? "You know what he's like," she said, certain that Kellon had no idea.
"Well, I'm envious," Kellon admitted, snuggling back under the covers. "I expect details tomorrow."
"Hn. Don't expect too much." Frila tossed her hair back. "But I do have some other stuff to tell you later, if you'll listen?"
Kellon picked up a shadow of hurt in her voice, and caught her friend's gaze, propping herself up on her elbows.
"Of course," she said, softly. "I'll be right here."
"Thanks." Frila turned to the door.
"Will you be back?" asked Kellon, a little anxiously. "Tonight, I mean?"
Frila paused in the open doorway, silhouetted in the light from the hallway.
"I don't know," she whispered. "I really don't know."
The door swooshed shut behind her.
* * * * * * *
The bath water was just hot enough to turn her skin pink, without being so hot as to make her dizzy; the soothing scent of lavender and rose petals floated on the warm air, and the world fluttered pleasantly in the candlelight.
"I love you so much," Xu whispered into her damp hair.
"Me too." Selphie lazily stroked Xu's arm, idly stroking the tap with one toe.
There was a long pause. Selphie's eyes flickered closed.
She floated for a moment, almost asleep, and then suddenly, out of nowhere, she remembered the shriek of Bane's voice as it left her, the black invasion of its junction...
Her eyes snapped open, focusing with relief on a candle flame.
"You okay?"
"Yeah. Um. Yeah." She forced herself to relax, suddenly realising she was gripping Xu's arm so tightly that her flesh was white under Selphie's fingers.
"Tell me." Xu smoothed Selphie's hair over her shoulders, marvelling at how long it was without its usual perky flip.
"I… I can't. Soon. Just… not yet."
Xu pressed her lips against the damp skin at Selphie's neck. "Soon as you're ready, sweetheart," she said.
"It was horrible," said Selphie, in a very small voice. I couldn't stop it. It came into my mind, and I couldn't stop it.
Xu rested her chin on Selphie's shoulder, sliding her arms further around her tiny waist.
"It's evil. Pure evil." It made me evil. It made me want to kill the people I love the most.
"I know, darling. I know."
Selphie's voice was lowered to a whisper. "It's still out there, Xu."
Xu closed her eyes, and hugged Selphie closer.
"It can't hurt you any more," she said. "I won't let it. Squall won't let it. We'll track down whatever crystal it's got itself into and we'll destroy it. I promise you. I'll keep you safe. I'll find a way to stop it junctioning. Something. Anything. Whatever happens, I promise I'll keep you safe."
"Really?" But it was you who let it loose. Can you really stop something that powerful? Can Squall? Can anyone?
"I swear. I love you so much. So, so much."
"Can you make me forget?"
"No, Selphie. At least, not forever. But I can make it better. I can always make it better."
"Please?" Almost a whimper.
Xu gently twisted Selphie's shoulders so she could kiss her, wet lips searching wet lips, tongue tips dancing. She brushed silky fingertips over a nipple, smiled into their kiss as Selphie responded to her touch.
Selphie arched, water spilling over the sides of the bath, and sighed. She surrendered herself completely to Xu's hands, resting her head back on Xu's shoulder, rocking her body into Xu's caress, little cries escaping from her throat.
It was heaven, and comfort, and bliss, and for a little while, she almost forgot.
Almost.
* * * * * * *
Irvine lay on his bed, and worried about Frila's gunblade.
He couldn't get out of his head that he'd left it in the cave, that he hadn't thought to pick it up, and that she'd be sad. It was a stupid thing to worry about, on the scale of things that had happened that night, but he couldn't seem to stop himself. That, and he was tired; Ether had been complaining so loudly he'd had to unjunction, and he was still dimly but unavoidably aware that his Guardian hadn't forgiven him for leaving Squall and Rinoa on the beach.
It was bound to mean a lot to her, the gunblade. Her father had made it for her, and it had her emblem engraved on the blade.
She'd saved his life with it.
He jumped at the sound of the door chime.
She was still alive, looking amazingly hot in old jeans and t-shirt, her hair loose and freshly-washed. He felt a jolt through his body that made him pleased Ether wasn't junctioned right then.
"Hey," he said.
"Hi." She wasn't smiling.
"Come in," he frowned, leading her into the room. "You want anything? Disgusting coffee, water…"
"You had sex with Squall and Rinoa on the beach," she said, flatly.
He turned to her, stunned, wondering how on earth she could have even guessed. "No, I didn't," he said. "Not…quite."
"It's none of my business," she said. "I just want to know the truth. I guess it was Ether, right? From the mind link."
"After today, I think it is your business," he said, horrified by the pain in her eyes. "Yes, we were close, because of the mind link, and things were getting carried away. Ether wanted it real bad, but I didn't. I wanted you. So I left them there, and came back. That's the truth, Hotshot, I swear."
She wanted so badly to believe him.
"I…"
"Hotshot, I won't have you thinking I did that. We can settle this once and for all. Come look in my head."
"What?" She felt so tired, all of a sudden, that all she wanted was to go back to her room, crawl under the covers, and sleep. She's had enough drama and excitement, enough late nights and emotional roller-coaster rides, and she missed the calming presence of Oceanus in her mind so much it actually made her head ache.
Irvine took her hand, and led her to the bed. "Ether can link us," he said, eagerly. "You can look in my mind, and see that I'm telling the truth."
It would be nice to know, for certain. She was sick of uncertainty, too, she realised.
Then they were sitting opposite each other on the bed, and he was holding her hands. "Just be careful not to get involved, Hotshot, okay? Just watch, or you could do some damage…"
She pulled her hands out of his. "No," she whispered. "I don't want this."
"But…"
She searched his anxious eyes, and knew the truth as clearly as if she'd gone into his mind. She reached out and touched his face. "I trust you," she said. "If you say it didn't happen, it didn't happen. I don't need to get in your head."
He threaded his fingers through her hair. "It didn't happen," he promised.
She let him pull her closer, and brush her lips with his. "I know," she whispered, and melted into his kiss.
He held her and kissed her for a long time, stroking her hair, moaning softly when she pressed her body against his. Eventually she glanced her lips past his ear with a whisper. "Ether?"
"You sure? He's mighty hungry, and I don't want… I just want to be with you, Hotshot, if you don't…"
"Irvine Kinneas," she pulled back a little to show him the wicked grin on her face. "Will you ever get the message that I really, really," she clasped the buckle of his belt and tugged, "really want to get in your pants?"
His answering grin was pure Kinneas, and set her body on fire.
He pulled Ether swiftly into junction, letting his Guardian choose what power to put where, just welcoming him into his mind, gasping at the flood of need that threatened to overwhelm him.
~Want. Need. Take.~
Irvine pulled her t-shirt cleanly over her head, dipping his head to taste her creamy flesh, engulfing one nipple and a good amount of breast with his hungry mouth. She threw her head back, soft hair caressing her naked back, clutching his shoulders.
~Share.~
Irvine tentatively opened his mind to Frila's, letting Ether rush between them.
~Sniper. Shield. Want. Need. Take.~
Irvine looked up at her, startled, her nipple falling from his mouth. "Shield?"
She let out a little whimper at the sudden loss of his touch to her aching breast. "It's a long story," she gasped. "Explain later. Fuck now."
Ether's need filled them both, and Irvine's curiosity vanished.
They clung feverishly to each other, a frenzy of wet kisses and stroking fingers, lost to their own desire and Ether's song. Clothes were flung to the floor and they explored each others' flesh with tongues and lips, limbs twining together, a mass of red hair and flushed skin, copper and flame.
After what felt like a long time, he rolled on top of her, and slipped inside her, hot and tight, felt the kick of her heels on his back as she wrapped her legs around him. He took her with full, unfettered passion, letting her love flow through the mind link to surround him, her body hot and eager and hungry underneath his. He thrust into her without fear, without regret, without restraint, devouring her mouth with his, tasting her thoughts, her feelings, her own overwhelming passion.
When she came, Ether sang in his head so loud he could hardly think; he could only sink into her pleasure and feel it with her, the pulsing release flowing through her body; he pressed his lips to her chest, where the wound had been, and felt her heart thumping, strong and hard, her lungs gasping air and letting it out on a long sigh. He closed his eyes tight and fell over the edge before he'd really believed he was there, shooting his come inside her in steady streams, each one pulling another thrill of bliss from his body.
~Sniper. Shield. You are glorious.~
Glorious? That makes a change, thought Irvine, wearily, as the last jerks of his orgasm subsided and he sought out her mouth with his for a final, sated kiss.
~I think that surpassed magnificent.~ Her voice, in his head.
~Definitely,~ he agreed.
"Mmmm…" she murmured, out loud. "That was worth coming back for."
Irvine rolled slowly to one side, suddenly no longer confident that his arms were strong enough to keep him from crushing her. He lay on his back, and pulled her into his side, tucking her head under his chin, and settled to stroking her gorgeous, fascinating hair.
He sighed contentedly, and carefully closed the mind link, pulling Ether back.
They lay, still and quiet, as the first light of dawn came, lightening shadows to grey through Irvine's room.
"I'm really sorry I left your gunblade behind," he said.
"That's okay."
"No, I mean, I'm really sorry. I know what it's like getting attached to a weapon. If I were ever to lose Exeter…"
"Don't be," she said. "It wasn't exactly lucky for me. It was my mother's. I never liked it much."
"Your mother's?"
"Yes. Dad insisted, family heirloom and all."
"Wow. There's so much I don't know about you, Hotshot. You know, I'm really looking forward to putting that right." He gave her a little hug.
She squeezed her eyes tight, drawing her breath deep into her lungs.
She had to tell him. It had to be now. There would be no better time, and no worse time. It had to be now.
"I can't stay," she said, the breath that bore her words making a tendril of his hair flutter on his chest.
He didn't say anything, but his hand stilled on her hair.
"I can't be with you any more," she continued. "I have to let you go."
His mind was racing suddenly, as he tried to understand what she was telling him. He knew she loved him. She'd died for him, and he'd been in her head, and he knew she loved him. He frowned.
"What if I don't want to be let go?"
She pulled herself up onto one elbow, and looked into his eyes. "I have to do it just the same," she said.
He started to believe she was serious. Panic flickered through his mind. He didn't want to lose her. She felt too good, in his arms like this. Too good. He swallowed hard.
"But I lo.."
She silenced him with a finger to his lips. "No," she said. "You don't. Not like I love you. Not like you love Selphie."
"That's not…" That doesn't matter. You feel good. I want you.
"I've shared your mind, remember?" She stroked the hair back from his face. "Twice, now. I know exactly what you feel for me. It's nice. It's very hot," her eyes flashed lust for a second. "But you're not in love with me. And I have things to do."
"What kind of things?"
"Well, growing up, for one. I'm not sure I'm ready for all this… stuff. It's too big, too scary. I need to work hard, to pass my exams and graduate and be as strong as I possibly can. Much as I hate to admit it, being with you isn't really conducive to being a good student. At least, not in all the areas I need to be good in."
"When I thought I'd lost you, I…"
"Oceanus gave his life to send me back for a purpose, Irvine."
"I could help." He reached out to touch her face, tracing a finger along her cheekbones, her blue-green eyes more intent and focused than he'd ever seen them.
"You'll have your own life to worry about. I can't believe Squall's going to leave you to your own devices for long. He'll be wanting to go dig up those caves and search every single crystal till he finds Bane. He's got the governments of the world getting really worried about the amount of power he's got, and that's not going to exactly get better after tonight's little incident. He'll need yet another recruitment drive after all the casualties… and he needs you, Irvine. You keep him balanced, you help him cope with it all. He needs your help. I've got to find my own way."
"But…"
"I have other shit to deal with. I've got to sort out what happened with Sen, and come to terms with losing Oceanus, and Sanke… it's big stuff, and I've always done the big stuff on my own. It's how I am."
"You're dumping me," said Irvine, as if it had only just dawned on him.
She kissed him longingly, lingeringly. "Yes," she said.
"I thought you…"
"You know," she corrected. "You know I love you."
He looked at her, confused, and started to stroke her hair again. "I don't understand," he said.
"Trust me," she replied, snuggling back down against his chest. "I know I'm just a kid, and all this is kind of new to me, but I think it's close to what you were trying to tell me all along."
Irvine didn't want to think about it. He wanted to hold her like this for a long time, and for it not to be the last time, and if he didn't love her, if he wasn't in love with her, well, did that really matter?
Deep in his heart, he remembered Selphie, and he knew that it did.
* * * * * * *
Squall sat leaning against the cliff, holding Rinoa close, his arms wrapped around her middle, her back nestling against his chest, as they watched the sunrise. The first grey wash of light was slowly being replaced by a rich glow of purple and gold; soft, buttery rays of sunshine just starting to slant across the sea. He rested his chin on Rinoa's salt-tangled hair, and smiled.
"Do you really think Quistis was ill?" she asked.
"Laguna said so." Squall gave her a little squeeze with his thighs, the leather of his jeans squeaking against her bare legs. "I said we wouldn't be back until this morning, and he said she was too far gone to care. When I said 'what?' he said something about champagne and her needing to lie down for a while. He promised to look after her."
"You think she's actually pissed, then? Quistis? Drunk?"
"Sounds like." Squall smiled. "I guess it must have been a weight off her mind, what with Seifer and everything. Nice to know she can cut loose."
"She's more fun than you'd think, once she lets her hair down," said Rinoa.
Squall wondered when she might have found that out, but he didn't say anything.
"I have sand absolutely everywhere," she added. "Just in case you were wondering."
"Me too," he agreed with a rueful grin. "We ought to go back for a shower. In a bit."
"Hmm."
They sat in silence for a while, listening to crash of waves on the beach, the distant chorus of birdsong.
"I hope Hotshot's okay," said Rinoa, eventually.
"Yes," said Squall. "Whatever happened back there, it's tough losing a Guardian. I remember when I lost Odin…"
"And Oceanus was her first Guardian." Rin rubbed her cheek slowly up and down his arm, raising goose-bumps and making the barely-visible hairs stand up, his skin suddenly tingling.
He nodded, kissed the top of her head. "The first one's always special." Shiva murmured to him, somewhere in the back of his mind, like a puff of misty breath in cold air.
Squall looked out to sea, an early morning breeze ruffling his long dark hair. For a moment, he thought he saw a shape in the surf, something like a dragon, gathering form and substance, wings and scales and noble head.
But it crashed to the shore, just a wave after all.