I don't own anything here, blah, blah, blah.
Episode 2
Jeopardy them plays, then stops
Alex: Welcome back to our Metal Gear Solid version of Celebrity Jeopardy. For those of you watching, I assure you walk out of living room right now. Let's look at the scores. Raiden . . . no last name given . . .has -$2500, because he repeated the questions I asked him every time?
Raiden: Every time?
Alex: Yes, every time. Did you not listen to the words I just said?
Raiden: Words? Said? I don't understand.
Alex: For the love of God, shut your mouth. Revolver Ocelot has a commanding lead of $0, for he has never rung in, all he did in the first round was polish his revolver.
Ocelot: Ha! This whole Jeopardy act is actually a scripting for the Patriots called AT, short for Alex Trebek.
Alex: I feel like I want to punch you. And finally, setting a new Jeopardy record with -$1,300,625 . . . Sean Connery.
Sean: Trebek, you dare queshtion my intelligence? Well then, how 'bout I queshtion your mother's virginity? Hahahahaha.
Alex: Terrific. Let's look at the categories. They are, POTENT POTABLES, SOCKS, LETTERS BETWEEN A AND C, POTPOURI, KITTIES, FAMOUS CONDOS, and finally, NAP TIME. Unfortunately, Mr. Connery, it's your board.
Sean: I'll play your little game Trebek. I'll take SOCKS for $10 thousand.
Alex: How about SOCKS for $400. And the answer is, These are parts of the body where you put your socks on.
beep
Alex: Mr. Raiden.
Raiden: Me? I'm not so sure.
Alex: If you're not so sure, then why did you buzz in?
Raiden: Buzz in?
Alex: Please NBC, fire me.
beep
Alex: Mr. Connery.
Sean: Alex Trebek.
Alex: Yeah, that's my name so?
Sean: Ishn't that the anshwer? The category is SUCKS and I shaid Alex Trebek, who sucks. Hahahahahaha
Alex: Someone, kill me now.
Ocelot: Don't mind if I do.
Alex: That was supposed to be sarcastic. Anyway if I died, Mr. Connery would probably kill himself and torture me in hell.
Sean: Damn shtraight.
Alex: Mr. Connery, pick another category.
Sean: I'll take FAMOUS CONDOMS for $3 million? Hahahahahahahaha!
Alex: That's FAMOUS CONDOS, not CONDOMS. Ocelot just pick any category.
Ocelot shoots the $600 space for LETTERS BETWEEN A AND C
Alex: I wish I had a gun to shoot you all! Anyway, LETTERS BETWEEN A AND C for $600. This is the only letter between A and C.
beep
Alex: Raiden, and please don't repeat anything.
Raiden: Understood.
Alex: Thank God. Name the only letter between A and C.
Raiden: Letter? A and C? Only? This is too hard!
Alex: Good Lord! Obviously the only letter between A and C is B. B. B. B!
Raiden: I have a bitch for a wife.
Alex: I really don't care.
Sean: You should be talking Trebek. You have your mother as your wife, who's alsho my wife, and all this mans's brothers' wife?
Sean Connery points to random man in audience.
Alex: You know what, let's move onto Final Jeopardy. And the category is, WHAT IS YOUR NAME? All you have to do is right your name.
Final Jeopardy theme plays
Alex: You can write your first name, last name, nickname, A name, I really don't care as long as it is a name.
Theme stops
Alex: OK, let's see how you guys messed up. Raiden you wrote down, What is my name??? You don't know your own name?
Raiden: No, I'll pick my own name, and pass on more than just DNA to my child.
Alex; Shut up. Let's see what you wagered, $???, 3 question marks next to a dollar sign. I'm speechless. Ocelot, you wrote, you put a bullet-hole in the podium.
Ocelot: No one knows that my real name is Ivan Shalashaska, and no one will ever find that out.
Alex: I wish I can choke you, but according to NBC law, I can't harm any contestant, that's why I'm filing a lawsuit. Finally, Sean Connery, you wrote, SC, you wrote your initials. I think we'll accept that as an answer. And you wagered, Suck Cock Trebek.
-uck is under S and -ock is under C and Trebek is under both words.
Sean: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Alex: Very funny. Once again, I'm going home, and plotiing the murder of Mr. Connery. Good nght everyone.
End of episode.
Episode 2
Jeopardy them plays, then stops
Alex: Welcome back to our Metal Gear Solid version of Celebrity Jeopardy. For those of you watching, I assure you walk out of living room right now. Let's look at the scores. Raiden . . . no last name given . . .has -$2500, because he repeated the questions I asked him every time?
Raiden: Every time?
Alex: Yes, every time. Did you not listen to the words I just said?
Raiden: Words? Said? I don't understand.
Alex: For the love of God, shut your mouth. Revolver Ocelot has a commanding lead of $0, for he has never rung in, all he did in the first round was polish his revolver.
Ocelot: Ha! This whole Jeopardy act is actually a scripting for the Patriots called AT, short for Alex Trebek.
Alex: I feel like I want to punch you. And finally, setting a new Jeopardy record with -$1,300,625 . . . Sean Connery.
Sean: Trebek, you dare queshtion my intelligence? Well then, how 'bout I queshtion your mother's virginity? Hahahahaha.
Alex: Terrific. Let's look at the categories. They are, POTENT POTABLES, SOCKS, LETTERS BETWEEN A AND C, POTPOURI, KITTIES, FAMOUS CONDOS, and finally, NAP TIME. Unfortunately, Mr. Connery, it's your board.
Sean: I'll play your little game Trebek. I'll take SOCKS for $10 thousand.
Alex: How about SOCKS for $400. And the answer is, These are parts of the body where you put your socks on.
beep
Alex: Mr. Raiden.
Raiden: Me? I'm not so sure.
Alex: If you're not so sure, then why did you buzz in?
Raiden: Buzz in?
Alex: Please NBC, fire me.
beep
Alex: Mr. Connery.
Sean: Alex Trebek.
Alex: Yeah, that's my name so?
Sean: Ishn't that the anshwer? The category is SUCKS and I shaid Alex Trebek, who sucks. Hahahahahaha
Alex: Someone, kill me now.
Ocelot: Don't mind if I do.
Alex: That was supposed to be sarcastic. Anyway if I died, Mr. Connery would probably kill himself and torture me in hell.
Sean: Damn shtraight.
Alex: Mr. Connery, pick another category.
Sean: I'll take FAMOUS CONDOMS for $3 million? Hahahahahahahaha!
Alex: That's FAMOUS CONDOS, not CONDOMS. Ocelot just pick any category.
Ocelot shoots the $600 space for LETTERS BETWEEN A AND C
Alex: I wish I had a gun to shoot you all! Anyway, LETTERS BETWEEN A AND C for $600. This is the only letter between A and C.
beep
Alex: Raiden, and please don't repeat anything.
Raiden: Understood.
Alex: Thank God. Name the only letter between A and C.
Raiden: Letter? A and C? Only? This is too hard!
Alex: Good Lord! Obviously the only letter between A and C is B. B. B. B!
Raiden: I have a bitch for a wife.
Alex: I really don't care.
Sean: You should be talking Trebek. You have your mother as your wife, who's alsho my wife, and all this mans's brothers' wife?
Sean Connery points to random man in audience.
Alex: You know what, let's move onto Final Jeopardy. And the category is, WHAT IS YOUR NAME? All you have to do is right your name.
Final Jeopardy theme plays
Alex: You can write your first name, last name, nickname, A name, I really don't care as long as it is a name.
Theme stops
Alex: OK, let's see how you guys messed up. Raiden you wrote down, What is my name??? You don't know your own name?
Raiden: No, I'll pick my own name, and pass on more than just DNA to my child.
Alex; Shut up. Let's see what you wagered, $???, 3 question marks next to a dollar sign. I'm speechless. Ocelot, you wrote, you put a bullet-hole in the podium.
Ocelot: No one knows that my real name is Ivan Shalashaska, and no one will ever find that out.
Alex: I wish I can choke you, but according to NBC law, I can't harm any contestant, that's why I'm filing a lawsuit. Finally, Sean Connery, you wrote, SC, you wrote your initials. I think we'll accept that as an answer. And you wagered, Suck Cock Trebek.
-uck is under S and -ock is under C and Trebek is under both words.
Sean: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Alex: Very funny. Once again, I'm going home, and plotiing the murder of Mr. Connery. Good nght everyone.
End of episode.