Ch. 2
Mending the Future
6 months later
Squall stepped out of the training center drenched in his own sweat. Wiping his forehead dry on his sleeve Squall walked down the crowded halls of Balamb garden.
It was between classes and most cadets were mingling. A few of the girls stood in groups pointing and giggling at him. Squall wished he would have stayed in the training center a little longer so then he could have come out to an empty and more importantly quiet hallways. However, this not being the circumstances Squall trudged through the crowds making his way to his dorm.
Relief washed over the young commander as he shut his door behind him. He found great comfort in the solitude that his room gave him.
He jumped into the shower letting the warm prickles of water ease his tired muscles. Why couldn't life be like a shower he wondered? Always comforting, always calm, always there. There was nothing to be questioned about a shower. It was the place where he knew he could be truly alone.just then he heard a knock on his door. The irony made him chuckle bitterly.
Squall angrily got out of the shower wrapping a towel around his waist.
"Who is it?" he growled.
"It's Zell."
Squall opened the door to find the martial arts expert standing in his door way punching invisible enemies. There was something about Zell Dincht that just screamed energy. Squall still hadn't decided if he found it amusing or annoying.
"What do you want?" Squall asked irritated.
"I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the bar tonight. It's been so long since you've been out and even Nida agreed to go out with us so like what do you say?"
Squall looked at his friend. He knew why he wanted him to go out so badly. Today would be six months since Rinoa.
Painfully Squall answered "Not tonight."
"Oh come on man," Zell pestered "You could use a night out." "I said not tonight."
From his demeanor Squall could tell that Zell finally got the hint.
"Okay then I'll be in my room if you change your mind."
Without another word Zell left. Squall shut the door behind him.
He knew that Zell just wanted to help, but this was the one thing that Zell couldn't help him with, no one could. There was no way to mend his broken heart.
Squall still in his towel laid down on his bed. It had been six months, six agonizing months since his world came crashing to an end. Not a day passed by since that fatal day that Squall didn't think of her. She haunted him day and night. Her beautiful image forever imprinted in his heart.
It was unhealthy the way Squall was living, but he didn't try to stop it. He truly couldn't let her go he never wanted to.
The day slowly went on when all the while Squall lay in bed his heart lost in love that could never truly love again. His soul lost in a feeling that would never feel again. Eventually the sadness engulfed him to the point where Squall couldn't take it.
He got up from his bed, got changed into his usual entire then after grabbing his gunblade Squall left the garden.
Balamb beach always had a rare beauty that few places could compare to. It was unusually tranquil, but this Squall didn't mind.
Taking off his boots and rolling up his pants Squall sat down on the empty beach burying his feet in the sand feeling the waves strike up against his ankles. It was dark and the stars were glowing brightly the scene made him think immediately of Rinoa. How he wished that she could be sitting next to him enjoying the moment.
Out from no where Squall heard a familiar arrogant voice call out to him.
"Well, well if it isn't commander puberty boy."
Squall turned around even though there was no need to for he immediately knew who it was.
"What the hell are you doing here?" He snarled at his former rival.
"I live here the question really is what the hell are you doing here?"
"It's none of your business." "It never is Squall, but you know somehow I always tend to make it mine."
Squall sighed this isn't what he needed at the moment. Seifer walked up next to him Squall didn't move from his place in the sand.
"So how long has it been?" Seifer asked.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Squall's patience was already running thin.
"You know damn well what I'm askin. I bet anything your thinking bout it right now."
He didn't say anything. Squall couldn't talk about it with any of his friends there was no way he was going to talk about it with Seifer. Who the hell did he think he was anyway?
"So how long?" Seifer persisted, but still Squall didn't say anything.
"Fine be like that you never had the guts to stand up for anything anyway. Why would you for her?"
That was it, Squall stood up looking daggers at his old rival.
"I'm glad that I finally got a rise out of you." Seifer says pulling out his gunblade and holding it an attack position. "What do you say Squall just one fight for old time sake?"
Raising his own gunblade Squall glared menacingly at Seifer. It had been awhile since he had a skilled opponent. However, it wasn't about old rivalries or skills at the moment Squall just wanted to give Seifer an old fashion beating.
"Let's do this." Squall mumbled.
Seifer's eyes light up and without any transition he threw a mighty blow in Squall's direction, the Balamb commander gracefully defended.
Their blades clashed again and again every strike as fierce as the last. They didn't say anything for a long time letting their blades do all the talking.
At last when they took a break to catch their breathes Seifer asked.
"Do you still miss her?"
Did he still miss her? Of course he still missed her not a day goes by when he doesn't think of her, but of course Squall didn't say any of that he just stood there silently. "I know you cared for her it's not ever day that Squall Leonhart will go out of his way for a girl, but it's not like she didn't care for you too. I saw the way she looked at you; she never looked at me like that."
Still Squall remained silent. Why was he saying all this? Without a signal of his actions Seifer continued his attacks this time, unfortunately for Squall, he wasn't silent.
"You know I never got to say goodbye. I didn't even get to come to her funeral."
"You could have come," Squall argued.
"Oh yeah I'm sure that would have gone over real well. Last time I checked all of garden sees me as the spawn of the devil."
"Do you have a point Seifer?"
"Yeah, you're not the only one who misses her. You should stop being so self-centered and take a look around you."
Squall eyed Seifer carefully "Did you still have feelings for her?" He asked swinging his gunblade at Seifer's head, which Seifer carefully reflected.
"Not in the way you think. Like I said she never looked at me the way that she looked at you. I just wish.I wish I could have said goodbye."
Squall staggered as he stepped away from Seifer. What was he saying? Noticing Squall's confusion Seifer continued to talk this time with his head down.
"You still got a lot going for you puberty boy. I hate to see you throw it all away. I'm sure Rinoa would too."
"What do you care?"
"If I can't be on top then the next best thing is you. Were one of the same Squall, two sides of the same coin. I mean all things set aside I never hated you.well at least most of the time."
"I'm not on the top Seifer not without Rinoa."
"Who says she's gone? Maybe you just have to look harder inside yourself."
Squall couldn't believe he was having this conversation with Seifer. He would have been better off going out with Zell and Nida.
Turning around Squall started walking away when Seifer called after him.
"You can't run away from it forever Squall. Someday it's gonna come back and bite you in the ass."
Squall stopped, was he running? It never felt like running, but rather hiding. Somehow he realized that running and hiding our the same thing. He didn't want to run or hide it was just easier that way. Just to be alone with his thoughts of her. That was what he wanted, but was that what he needed? Squall didn't think so.
He walked up to Seifer who was still standing there.
"What about you? No one's heard of you in over a year isn't that running too."
"I don't have the options that you do. If I had a choice.well it wouldn't be this."
If they were the same coin then Squall had to admit he defiantly saw the light more then his other side. Squall didn't know if he could change the road he was on, but then looking up at Seifer he saw that he had jumped from road to road and he was right about one thing he didn't have the options that Squall had.
"What would you change Seifer?"
Seifer takes a moment to think before answering "I would go back a year, never commit the mistakes that I had made."
"But you can't," Squall told him.
"As much as you can't bring back Rinoa. That's kind of why you have to roll with the punches. Play with what you've got."
Dammit, he was making sense. Squall hated to admit it, but Seifer was getting through to him. He was right about him not able to change the past. If anything the whole Ultimicia ordeal should have taught him that. Still there were something's about the future that Squall could change. He looked at Seifer.
"Seifer given the chance would you come back to garden?"
Seifer gave him a funny look "What are you saying?"
"Would you or wouldn't you?"
With a sigh Seifer answers "If given the chance I guess I would."
And Seifer was given that second chance. After some convincing by Edea and himself headmaster Cid allowed Seifer to come back to the garden on the basis that he behaved.
At first Squall wasn't sure about his decision especially with Zell and Quistis always on his back about it, some are more willing to forgive then others, although Squall could hardly blame them. Seifer, however, soon changed their mines he worked hard and kept his toe in line.
Squall knew Rinoa would have been proud of him for helping Seifer. Squall still did everything he did for her.
6 months later
Squall stepped out of the training center drenched in his own sweat. Wiping his forehead dry on his sleeve Squall walked down the crowded halls of Balamb garden.
It was between classes and most cadets were mingling. A few of the girls stood in groups pointing and giggling at him. Squall wished he would have stayed in the training center a little longer so then he could have come out to an empty and more importantly quiet hallways. However, this not being the circumstances Squall trudged through the crowds making his way to his dorm.
Relief washed over the young commander as he shut his door behind him. He found great comfort in the solitude that his room gave him.
He jumped into the shower letting the warm prickles of water ease his tired muscles. Why couldn't life be like a shower he wondered? Always comforting, always calm, always there. There was nothing to be questioned about a shower. It was the place where he knew he could be truly alone.just then he heard a knock on his door. The irony made him chuckle bitterly.
Squall angrily got out of the shower wrapping a towel around his waist.
"Who is it?" he growled.
"It's Zell."
Squall opened the door to find the martial arts expert standing in his door way punching invisible enemies. There was something about Zell Dincht that just screamed energy. Squall still hadn't decided if he found it amusing or annoying.
"What do you want?" Squall asked irritated.
"I was just wondering if you wanted to go to the bar tonight. It's been so long since you've been out and even Nida agreed to go out with us so like what do you say?"
Squall looked at his friend. He knew why he wanted him to go out so badly. Today would be six months since Rinoa.
Painfully Squall answered "Not tonight."
"Oh come on man," Zell pestered "You could use a night out." "I said not tonight."
From his demeanor Squall could tell that Zell finally got the hint.
"Okay then I'll be in my room if you change your mind."
Without another word Zell left. Squall shut the door behind him.
He knew that Zell just wanted to help, but this was the one thing that Zell couldn't help him with, no one could. There was no way to mend his broken heart.
Squall still in his towel laid down on his bed. It had been six months, six agonizing months since his world came crashing to an end. Not a day passed by since that fatal day that Squall didn't think of her. She haunted him day and night. Her beautiful image forever imprinted in his heart.
It was unhealthy the way Squall was living, but he didn't try to stop it. He truly couldn't let her go he never wanted to.
The day slowly went on when all the while Squall lay in bed his heart lost in love that could never truly love again. His soul lost in a feeling that would never feel again. Eventually the sadness engulfed him to the point where Squall couldn't take it.
He got up from his bed, got changed into his usual entire then after grabbing his gunblade Squall left the garden.
Balamb beach always had a rare beauty that few places could compare to. It was unusually tranquil, but this Squall didn't mind.
Taking off his boots and rolling up his pants Squall sat down on the empty beach burying his feet in the sand feeling the waves strike up against his ankles. It was dark and the stars were glowing brightly the scene made him think immediately of Rinoa. How he wished that she could be sitting next to him enjoying the moment.
Out from no where Squall heard a familiar arrogant voice call out to him.
"Well, well if it isn't commander puberty boy."
Squall turned around even though there was no need to for he immediately knew who it was.
"What the hell are you doing here?" He snarled at his former rival.
"I live here the question really is what the hell are you doing here?"
"It's none of your business." "It never is Squall, but you know somehow I always tend to make it mine."
Squall sighed this isn't what he needed at the moment. Seifer walked up next to him Squall didn't move from his place in the sand.
"So how long has it been?" Seifer asked.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Squall's patience was already running thin.
"You know damn well what I'm askin. I bet anything your thinking bout it right now."
He didn't say anything. Squall couldn't talk about it with any of his friends there was no way he was going to talk about it with Seifer. Who the hell did he think he was anyway?
"So how long?" Seifer persisted, but still Squall didn't say anything.
"Fine be like that you never had the guts to stand up for anything anyway. Why would you for her?"
That was it, Squall stood up looking daggers at his old rival.
"I'm glad that I finally got a rise out of you." Seifer says pulling out his gunblade and holding it an attack position. "What do you say Squall just one fight for old time sake?"
Raising his own gunblade Squall glared menacingly at Seifer. It had been awhile since he had a skilled opponent. However, it wasn't about old rivalries or skills at the moment Squall just wanted to give Seifer an old fashion beating.
"Let's do this." Squall mumbled.
Seifer's eyes light up and without any transition he threw a mighty blow in Squall's direction, the Balamb commander gracefully defended.
Their blades clashed again and again every strike as fierce as the last. They didn't say anything for a long time letting their blades do all the talking.
At last when they took a break to catch their breathes Seifer asked.
"Do you still miss her?"
Did he still miss her? Of course he still missed her not a day goes by when he doesn't think of her, but of course Squall didn't say any of that he just stood there silently. "I know you cared for her it's not ever day that Squall Leonhart will go out of his way for a girl, but it's not like she didn't care for you too. I saw the way she looked at you; she never looked at me like that."
Still Squall remained silent. Why was he saying all this? Without a signal of his actions Seifer continued his attacks this time, unfortunately for Squall, he wasn't silent.
"You know I never got to say goodbye. I didn't even get to come to her funeral."
"You could have come," Squall argued.
"Oh yeah I'm sure that would have gone over real well. Last time I checked all of garden sees me as the spawn of the devil."
"Do you have a point Seifer?"
"Yeah, you're not the only one who misses her. You should stop being so self-centered and take a look around you."
Squall eyed Seifer carefully "Did you still have feelings for her?" He asked swinging his gunblade at Seifer's head, which Seifer carefully reflected.
"Not in the way you think. Like I said she never looked at me the way that she looked at you. I just wish.I wish I could have said goodbye."
Squall staggered as he stepped away from Seifer. What was he saying? Noticing Squall's confusion Seifer continued to talk this time with his head down.
"You still got a lot going for you puberty boy. I hate to see you throw it all away. I'm sure Rinoa would too."
"What do you care?"
"If I can't be on top then the next best thing is you. Were one of the same Squall, two sides of the same coin. I mean all things set aside I never hated you.well at least most of the time."
"I'm not on the top Seifer not without Rinoa."
"Who says she's gone? Maybe you just have to look harder inside yourself."
Squall couldn't believe he was having this conversation with Seifer. He would have been better off going out with Zell and Nida.
Turning around Squall started walking away when Seifer called after him.
"You can't run away from it forever Squall. Someday it's gonna come back and bite you in the ass."
Squall stopped, was he running? It never felt like running, but rather hiding. Somehow he realized that running and hiding our the same thing. He didn't want to run or hide it was just easier that way. Just to be alone with his thoughts of her. That was what he wanted, but was that what he needed? Squall didn't think so.
He walked up to Seifer who was still standing there.
"What about you? No one's heard of you in over a year isn't that running too."
"I don't have the options that you do. If I had a choice.well it wouldn't be this."
If they were the same coin then Squall had to admit he defiantly saw the light more then his other side. Squall didn't know if he could change the road he was on, but then looking up at Seifer he saw that he had jumped from road to road and he was right about one thing he didn't have the options that Squall had.
"What would you change Seifer?"
Seifer takes a moment to think before answering "I would go back a year, never commit the mistakes that I had made."
"But you can't," Squall told him.
"As much as you can't bring back Rinoa. That's kind of why you have to roll with the punches. Play with what you've got."
Dammit, he was making sense. Squall hated to admit it, but Seifer was getting through to him. He was right about him not able to change the past. If anything the whole Ultimicia ordeal should have taught him that. Still there were something's about the future that Squall could change. He looked at Seifer.
"Seifer given the chance would you come back to garden?"
Seifer gave him a funny look "What are you saying?"
"Would you or wouldn't you?"
With a sigh Seifer answers "If given the chance I guess I would."
And Seifer was given that second chance. After some convincing by Edea and himself headmaster Cid allowed Seifer to come back to the garden on the basis that he behaved.
At first Squall wasn't sure about his decision especially with Zell and Quistis always on his back about it, some are more willing to forgive then others, although Squall could hardly blame them. Seifer, however, soon changed their mines he worked hard and kept his toe in line.
Squall knew Rinoa would have been proud of him for helping Seifer. Squall still did everything he did for her.