Okay, Laura gave me the idea of a lake… Not the falling over part, mind
you, just the whole 'lake' thang… oh and she begged me to write more Billy
and Dominic… cos she loves him, apparently… I think she likes The Balding
Man…
LEGOLAS NAKED!! WOOHOO! I actually imagined this whilst in the car, driving through Mankychester with Laura, who was dancing at the side of me to 60's music…she is sad… okay, she has just made a good point, I was dancing also… less said about that the better… have u realised how amazingly well the fellowship fit into a musical?
'Stridy! Remember me!'
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The fish and chip incident had unsettled the fellowship a little, but not enough to stop Sam, Merry and Pippin having seconds and thirds, and fourths for Pippin, though he claimed he was full after the second helping. It was just after Orlando and Elijah had reappeared that they realized Billy and Dominic hadn't appeared for three chapters.
"You think we should go look for them?" Aragorn looked over at the elf, who had a mouthful of chips and salty gravy. He shrugged. Boromir, his fish and chips already eaten, looked longingly at the battered fish lying at the bottom of Aragorn's plate.
"They'll be alright." He said, sneakily reaching over to steal it with his plastic fork. Aragorn slapped his hand away.
"Maybe, in an hour or so." Legolas looked around the clearing and his gaze rested on Elrond sitting alone at a table and looking around as if paranoid someone, or thing, was going to come and talk to him. "Um, back in a minute." He slid from the bench and made his way over to the half-elf. Aragorn watched him go with a slight pout. Elijah and Orlando grinned at each other and smiled sweetly holding hands. Sam sat next to Sean and was biting into his chip butty. Sean was chatting to Merry and Pippin, watching in fascination as undisclosed amounts of food disappeared in their direction.
"Aragorn's jealous." Boromir whispered to Sam, and several elves on the table next to them looked up in interest.
"Legolas doesn't like Elrond…" Sam said, putting his chip butty back onto the plate. Boromir grinned knowingly. "He does?!"
"Yep." Boromir reached over and stole a chip from Orlando's plate, as the Thing was a little preoccupied with Elijah.
Billy woke up with a start. He shook his head, blinked several times, then looked around. Dominic was sat on a fallen log a little way away, smirking at him.
"Morning." He said as Billy sat up and stretched.
"What time is it?"
"I have no idea." Dominic stood up and walked over to Billy, crouching next to him. "We'd better go find the others." Billy nodded, and rubbed his eyes roughly.
"How'd we get here anyway?" Dominic shrugged.
"I have no idea. By all accounts it doesn't make sense." Billy shivered.
"Cold." He muttered, and Dominic smiled gently and slid his arm around Billy's shoulders.
"Come on Billy." He squeezed Billy's shoulders reassuringly. "Get up." He tried standing whilst still holding onto Billy, failed miserably and ended up flopping back down, landing on Billy's lap. "Oh, you are up."
Aragorn chewed on the straw to his drink, glaring at his foster father at the other side of the clearing. Elrond was talking to… well, being talked to by Legolas, smirking occasionally at the younger elf. Aragorn sighed and tried to concentrate on sucking the straw, but the images that conjured up were distracting him.
"That's it." He stood, brushing himself off and grabbing Anduril. "I'm going to find Billy and Dominic. Be back later." They watched him go with mild interest.
Dominic looked down at Billy, who was watching him with an unfamiliar predatory look in his eyes.
"We're all mucky Billy." He murmured, leaning closer. Billy grinned.
"We'd better get these dirty clothes off then." Billy pushed his body up against Dominic's, hearing the younger man groan.
"What good will that do?" Dominic closed his eyes and tried to focus on something a little less mind-numbingly incredible than Billy rubbing up against him.
"You're complaining?"
"Oh god, no!"
Aragorn fell over a lake. With a yelp, he landed face first in some shallow water. Spluttering, he sat up and looked round in shock. He was standing at the shore of a medium sized lake, where trees had been just moments before. His eyes widened.
"Oh crap." He muttered, then frowned in confusion at the unfamiliar word.
Billy led Dominic through the woods by the hand, his eyes widening in anticipation as he saw the lake.
"Dominic, time to get naked."
Aragorn crept round the lakeside. He had heard something that sounded suspiciously like moaning. Aragorn had been a ranger for a long time, and had seen many strange things in his travels. But what he hadn't expected to see was the two missing Things kissing madly in the lake. Especially when they looked like Merry and Pippin, only taller… with different hair, ears and probably various other things as well. As Aragorn watched, and felt like a dirty old man, the slightly shorter Thing started… thrusting? There was thrusting now? Aragorn, having not seen anything like that since he'd accidentally wandered into Haldirs room in Lothlorien, decided to wait a little further in the forest and confront the two Things when they'd finished. Maybe that would give him time to stop seething about Elrond, get the image of the two Things from his mind, and stop thinking about Legolas… in the water… naked in the…
Aragorn groaned to himself and banged his head against the nearest tree.
Unbeknownst to Aragorn, Billy or Dominic, the others had finished their fish and chips, waved goodbye to the elves, left Lord Elrond talking to a strange girl who kept calling him Elly, and had set off to find the remaining members of the fellowship.
Legolas was inspecting his tunic with a concerned look on his face. It was in danger of becoming smelly. He unbuttoned the top layer and peered down under it. Yes, it needed a wash.
"Everyone. We need a wash." He called out, and the others regarded him with a skeptical look. "What? It's a possibility that I might get smelly! We can't let that happen!" Merry, Pippin, Frodo, Sam and Boromir knew, by now, not to get between an elf and his hygiene, and quickly stopped Sean, Elijah and Orlando questions and curious looks. After a few moments of quiet listening, Legolas pointed. "That way! I hear splashing… And moaning, for some inexplicable reason."
Dominic was surprised. Billy was unlike anything he had ever known. Mainly because he could do that thing with the tongue and… He moaned again as Billy did that tongue thing again.
"Billy…" He gasped, twisting Billy's short hair between his fingers. "Did you hear that?" Billy raised his head.
"Hear what?"
"Something." In an amazing feat of self-control, or great idiocy, Dominic pushed Billy's body away from his. "What if someone's coming?"
"Give me a chance and you will." Billy muttered, but moved away and turned towards the shore.
"Water!" With a triumphant cry, Legolas raced from the trees and hastily started stripping on the shore. The others, minus Aragorn, followed him, stopping in shock at the now half-naked elf. Sam turned his head away and blushed bright red. Frodo, Merry, Pippin and Boromir stared in fascination. Sean's mouth fell open; Elijah reached over and closed it for him, whilst grinning mischievously at Orlando, "Hey, there's Billy and Dom." Orlando waved at the two Things, who had moved as far apart as possible. They waved back nervously. "What are you doing?"
"What does it look like? We're having a bath!" Dominic called back.
"A very good idea." Legolas grinned, having completely disrobed and was undoing the braids in his hair. Even Sam was staring at the naked elf, still blushing.
"Legolas!" Aragorn ran out from between the trees, to stand in front of the nude elf (did I mention he was NAKED) to hide him from the others, particularly Sam, who had started to hyperventilate.
"What?" Legolas looked confused. The ranger sighed.
"Do you mind? Just because elves have no idea what 'modesty' is, doesn't mean that you have to walk around naked in front of innocent young…" He glanced over at Merry, Pippin and Frodo, who were trying to peer round the ranger's legs to see the elf again. "Walk around naked in front of hobbits, that shouldn't be distracted at a time like this!"
"Hey, don't hate me cos I'm beautiful." He flashed Aragorn a big, cheesy grin, then ran full tilt into the water. Aragorn was left with an image of Legolas running, wearing only a big grin, and he groaned again, searching for the nearest tree to bang his head against.
LEGOLAS NAKED!! WOOHOO! I actually imagined this whilst in the car, driving through Mankychester with Laura, who was dancing at the side of me to 60's music…she is sad… okay, she has just made a good point, I was dancing also… less said about that the better… have u realised how amazingly well the fellowship fit into a musical?
'Stridy! Remember me!'
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The fish and chip incident had unsettled the fellowship a little, but not enough to stop Sam, Merry and Pippin having seconds and thirds, and fourths for Pippin, though he claimed he was full after the second helping. It was just after Orlando and Elijah had reappeared that they realized Billy and Dominic hadn't appeared for three chapters.
"You think we should go look for them?" Aragorn looked over at the elf, who had a mouthful of chips and salty gravy. He shrugged. Boromir, his fish and chips already eaten, looked longingly at the battered fish lying at the bottom of Aragorn's plate.
"They'll be alright." He said, sneakily reaching over to steal it with his plastic fork. Aragorn slapped his hand away.
"Maybe, in an hour or so." Legolas looked around the clearing and his gaze rested on Elrond sitting alone at a table and looking around as if paranoid someone, or thing, was going to come and talk to him. "Um, back in a minute." He slid from the bench and made his way over to the half-elf. Aragorn watched him go with a slight pout. Elijah and Orlando grinned at each other and smiled sweetly holding hands. Sam sat next to Sean and was biting into his chip butty. Sean was chatting to Merry and Pippin, watching in fascination as undisclosed amounts of food disappeared in their direction.
"Aragorn's jealous." Boromir whispered to Sam, and several elves on the table next to them looked up in interest.
"Legolas doesn't like Elrond…" Sam said, putting his chip butty back onto the plate. Boromir grinned knowingly. "He does?!"
"Yep." Boromir reached over and stole a chip from Orlando's plate, as the Thing was a little preoccupied with Elijah.
Billy woke up with a start. He shook his head, blinked several times, then looked around. Dominic was sat on a fallen log a little way away, smirking at him.
"Morning." He said as Billy sat up and stretched.
"What time is it?"
"I have no idea." Dominic stood up and walked over to Billy, crouching next to him. "We'd better go find the others." Billy nodded, and rubbed his eyes roughly.
"How'd we get here anyway?" Dominic shrugged.
"I have no idea. By all accounts it doesn't make sense." Billy shivered.
"Cold." He muttered, and Dominic smiled gently and slid his arm around Billy's shoulders.
"Come on Billy." He squeezed Billy's shoulders reassuringly. "Get up." He tried standing whilst still holding onto Billy, failed miserably and ended up flopping back down, landing on Billy's lap. "Oh, you are up."
Aragorn chewed on the straw to his drink, glaring at his foster father at the other side of the clearing. Elrond was talking to… well, being talked to by Legolas, smirking occasionally at the younger elf. Aragorn sighed and tried to concentrate on sucking the straw, but the images that conjured up were distracting him.
"That's it." He stood, brushing himself off and grabbing Anduril. "I'm going to find Billy and Dominic. Be back later." They watched him go with mild interest.
Dominic looked down at Billy, who was watching him with an unfamiliar predatory look in his eyes.
"We're all mucky Billy." He murmured, leaning closer. Billy grinned.
"We'd better get these dirty clothes off then." Billy pushed his body up against Dominic's, hearing the younger man groan.
"What good will that do?" Dominic closed his eyes and tried to focus on something a little less mind-numbingly incredible than Billy rubbing up against him.
"You're complaining?"
"Oh god, no!"
Aragorn fell over a lake. With a yelp, he landed face first in some shallow water. Spluttering, he sat up and looked round in shock. He was standing at the shore of a medium sized lake, where trees had been just moments before. His eyes widened.
"Oh crap." He muttered, then frowned in confusion at the unfamiliar word.
Billy led Dominic through the woods by the hand, his eyes widening in anticipation as he saw the lake.
"Dominic, time to get naked."
Aragorn crept round the lakeside. He had heard something that sounded suspiciously like moaning. Aragorn had been a ranger for a long time, and had seen many strange things in his travels. But what he hadn't expected to see was the two missing Things kissing madly in the lake. Especially when they looked like Merry and Pippin, only taller… with different hair, ears and probably various other things as well. As Aragorn watched, and felt like a dirty old man, the slightly shorter Thing started… thrusting? There was thrusting now? Aragorn, having not seen anything like that since he'd accidentally wandered into Haldirs room in Lothlorien, decided to wait a little further in the forest and confront the two Things when they'd finished. Maybe that would give him time to stop seething about Elrond, get the image of the two Things from his mind, and stop thinking about Legolas… in the water… naked in the…
Aragorn groaned to himself and banged his head against the nearest tree.
Unbeknownst to Aragorn, Billy or Dominic, the others had finished their fish and chips, waved goodbye to the elves, left Lord Elrond talking to a strange girl who kept calling him Elly, and had set off to find the remaining members of the fellowship.
Legolas was inspecting his tunic with a concerned look on his face. It was in danger of becoming smelly. He unbuttoned the top layer and peered down under it. Yes, it needed a wash.
"Everyone. We need a wash." He called out, and the others regarded him with a skeptical look. "What? It's a possibility that I might get smelly! We can't let that happen!" Merry, Pippin, Frodo, Sam and Boromir knew, by now, not to get between an elf and his hygiene, and quickly stopped Sean, Elijah and Orlando questions and curious looks. After a few moments of quiet listening, Legolas pointed. "That way! I hear splashing… And moaning, for some inexplicable reason."
Dominic was surprised. Billy was unlike anything he had ever known. Mainly because he could do that thing with the tongue and… He moaned again as Billy did that tongue thing again.
"Billy…" He gasped, twisting Billy's short hair between his fingers. "Did you hear that?" Billy raised his head.
"Hear what?"
"Something." In an amazing feat of self-control, or great idiocy, Dominic pushed Billy's body away from his. "What if someone's coming?"
"Give me a chance and you will." Billy muttered, but moved away and turned towards the shore.
"Water!" With a triumphant cry, Legolas raced from the trees and hastily started stripping on the shore. The others, minus Aragorn, followed him, stopping in shock at the now half-naked elf. Sam turned his head away and blushed bright red. Frodo, Merry, Pippin and Boromir stared in fascination. Sean's mouth fell open; Elijah reached over and closed it for him, whilst grinning mischievously at Orlando, "Hey, there's Billy and Dom." Orlando waved at the two Things, who had moved as far apart as possible. They waved back nervously. "What are you doing?"
"What does it look like? We're having a bath!" Dominic called back.
"A very good idea." Legolas grinned, having completely disrobed and was undoing the braids in his hair. Even Sam was staring at the naked elf, still blushing.
"Legolas!" Aragorn ran out from between the trees, to stand in front of the nude elf (did I mention he was NAKED) to hide him from the others, particularly Sam, who had started to hyperventilate.
"What?" Legolas looked confused. The ranger sighed.
"Do you mind? Just because elves have no idea what 'modesty' is, doesn't mean that you have to walk around naked in front of innocent young…" He glanced over at Merry, Pippin and Frodo, who were trying to peer round the ranger's legs to see the elf again. "Walk around naked in front of hobbits, that shouldn't be distracted at a time like this!"
"Hey, don't hate me cos I'm beautiful." He flashed Aragorn a big, cheesy grin, then ran full tilt into the water. Aragorn was left with an image of Legolas running, wearing only a big grin, and he groaned again, searching for the nearest tree to bang his head against.